TIME magazine and breast feeding a 4 year old

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Replies

  • gemiwing
    gemiwing Posts: 1,525 Member
    How do I feel about how long people I don't know breastfeed kids I'll never meet? None of my business- period. Do what you think is right, knock yourself out.

    How do I feel about the Time cover? I think their magazine's reputation for being newsworthy has been lacking since the early 90's and using a picture to create controversy is par for the course for them. I'm not surprised. They've run many stories in the past ten years that have been sensationalist and inaccurate. Nothing new under the Sun.
  • Bmontgomery613
    Bmontgomery613 Posts: 200 Member
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.



    ^^^^^^^^this^^^^^^^^^

    i am a mother. and i also have to say, at that age, or after 1yr, has NOTHING to do with the child anymore, this has everything to do about her. research.

    Really, then why does WHO and Unicef recommend breastfeeding till at least the age of 2? The APA, on the other hand recommends to do it for at least the first year. Benefits from breastmilk don't have a magical cut off date. It may not be your cup of tea, but implying that after age 1 there are no benefits for the child and that it must be an issue on the mother is incorrect.

    But, didn't you know that breastmilk turns to water at that magical age of 12 months??

    I breastfed both of my daughters, the oldest until she was 3.5 and the youngest until she was 2.5. They're both happy, socially adjusted girls. Did the attachment parenting help? I'd like to think it did. It certainly didn't hurt and I doubt they were scarred by the experience. I still get lots of hugs and kisses and am told that I'm "the best mom in the world and (they) don't ever want another." So, I think I did something right.

    The method you choose to feed your baby and how long mother and child (people seem to forget that many extended nursers do so because they take the child's opinion and feelings into account) are personal decisions. You don't have to agree with it, but neither are you the authority on which all parents should stop doing X. And to imply that a mother is nursing past one for her own benefit is insulting and shows your lack of intelligence on the matter.
  • va_va_voom
    va_va_voom Posts: 467 Member


    oh, but its less disgusting to give your kids milk from a cow teet?

    Except we don't' let our kids suck on said cow teet...


    I don't find it disgusting. Not my personal preference (and I am currently BFing baby #4), but your statement here isn't logical.
  • kimdoes
    kimdoes Posts: 90
    I still breast feed with my mom....er.

    LMFAO!!
  • lorierin22
    lorierin22 Posts: 432 Member
    First off to each his own...none of my business

    My personal opinion is if you can breastfeed great do it. but let's wean the child a little earlier than 3. If the mother wants to continue then I agree with others, pump and put in a cup. I have read there is no significant nutritional value in breast milk after a year of breastfeeding. just my .02

    You have received incorrect information regarding the nutritional value. There is no magic age that breastmilk loses it's nutritional value. It would have the same nutritional value if an adult chose to drink it. The nutrients in the milk are different from woman to woman and may not be as high as that found in cow's milk, however the body's ability to absorb those nutrients is MUCH higher (than cow's milk or other food). Therefore it is great for babies and younger children whose digestive systems are not as developed. Just because a person/child becomes old enough to get those nutrients from food, does not negate the fact that they can still get the same nutrients from breastmilk.
  • turningstar
    turningstar Posts: 393 Member
    Im still breastfeeding at 17.5 months, but my son is very high needs, and its more of an emotional thing than sustenance. I also cosleep. In many parts of the world that is the norm, but our country is very sexualized and into making kids be independent by 6 months old. Would I like to quit nursing? Hell yeah. But my boobs and I are hoping my son will wean himself soon. If not, we will wean at two years old. Not because I find it disgusting, but because im ready to have my body and my bed back! I haven't seen the picture, but it sounds like it was done in poor taste to start a ****storm between mothers. Really, as if being a mom isn't hard enough to deal with.
  • va_va_voom
    va_va_voom Posts: 467 Member
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.



    ^^^^^^^^this^^^^^^^^^

    i am a mother. and i also have to say, at that age, or after 1yr, has NOTHING to do with the child anymore, this has everything to do about her. research.

    Really, then why does WHO and Unicef recommend breastfeeding till at least the age of 2? The APA, on the other hand recommends to do it for at least the first year. Benefits from breastmilk don't have a magical cut off date. It may not be your cup of tea, but implying that after age 1 there are no benefits for the child and that it must be an issue on the mother is incorrect.

    But, didn't you know that breastmilk turns to water at that magical age of 12 months??

    I breastfed both of my daughters, the oldest until she was 3.5 and the youngest until she was 2.5. They're both happy, socially adjusted girls. Did the attachment parenting help? I'd like to think it did. It certainly didn't hurt and I doubt they were scarred by the experience. I still get lots of hugs and kisses and am told that I'm "the best mom in the world and (they) don't ever want another." So, I think I did something right.

    The method you choose to feed your baby and how long mother and child (people seem to forget that many extended nursers do so because they take the child's opinion and feelings into account) are personal decisions. You don't have to agree with it, but neither are you the authority on which all parents should stop doing X. And to imply that a mother is nursing past one for her own benefit is insulting and shows your lack of intelligence on the matter.

    Would you agree, though, that attachment parenting does not have to include EBF? I have done attachment parenting with all four of my kids, but the longest I nursed any of them was 12 monhts (12 months for the oldest, 10 months for the next two, and still nursing the baby). They seem very well adjusted and I get told that I'm the best mom in the world, too. So, to me, the EBF part of attachment parenting seems to be optional.
  • Bmontgomery613
    Bmontgomery613 Posts: 200 Member
    I think the point of the cover was to spark just this kind of debate. I think that all of the people who say breastfeeding at 3 or 4 is "weird" or "unnatural" are dead wrong and it's long past the time when the United States needs to move past the sexualization of the breast.

    WHO recommends MINIMUM two years. And both the APA and WHO agree on the same principle: breastfeed as long as it continues to be agreeable to both child and mother. The kid will wean on his or her own. Or the mother will reach a point where she's ready to stop.

    Sorry, this thread really pisses me off. I can't believe that in the year 2012 mothers have to defend themselves for breast feeding for crying out loud. What the hell do you think women have breasts for????

    Play toys for men, duh! Didn't you know that women are simply walking sex toys?? ((sarcasm, btw))
  • I don't have an issue with it. I think it's great she breastfeeds her child, I'm all for it, just not on a cover of a magazine. I think if they wanted to put it on the cover of a magazine for all of the right reasons to show that breastfeeding is best for bablies/children they could have done it in a more positive manner but not like that. I support breast feeding mothers!!
  • momma_a
    momma_a Posts: 117 Member
    Well, here's my opinion: If the mom wants to give it for nutritional value, put it in a cup. The kid will be four in June, for cripes sake. And, as my friend put it, 'when the kid is old enough to say 'yo mom, tit', then likely they are a bit too old to be at the boob.

    The bigger issue I have with this cover is what it says; Are you mom enough? That is some BS. Just because some mother's don't breastfeed, it doesn't mean they are any less of a mother than this attention wh*re on the front of Time.
  • iaemmy
    iaemmy Posts: 13 Member
    I find it interesting all the posters who say something along the lines of "XX is too old. I don't have a problem with a mother giving her child breast milk, but If the kiddo wants the milk, put it in a cup/bottle/sippy." So the issue, for many, isn't that the mother is still lactating and the child still drinking, but the bothersome fact is that the milk comes from BREASTS. Newsflash. Milk from every mammal comes from tits/teats/breasts. That's just nature. Cows' milk comes from cow teats. Oh, but wait, cows' teats aren't sexualized by society and their biological purpose isn't sigmatized. When you think about it, which is weirder? A mother feeding her child milk that was biologically designed for that child and changes over time to meet the child's growing needs, or milk that was designed for a baby cow?
  • Bmontgomery613
    Bmontgomery613 Posts: 200 Member
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.



    ^^^^^^^^this^^^^^^^^^

    i am a mother. and i also have to say, at that age, or after 1yr, has NOTHING to do with the child anymore, this has everything to do about her. research.

    Really, then why does WHO and Unicef recommend breastfeeding till at least the age of 2? The APA, on the other hand recommends to do it for at least the first year. Benefits from breastmilk don't have a magical cut off date. It may not be your cup of tea, but implying that after age 1 there are no benefits for the child and that it must be an issue on the mother is incorrect.

    But, didn't you know that breastmilk turns to water at that magical age of 12 months??

    I breastfed both of my daughters, the oldest until she was 3.5 and the youngest until she was 2.5. They're both happy, socially adjusted girls. Did the attachment parenting help? I'd like to think it did. It certainly didn't hurt and I doubt they were scarred by the experience. I still get lots of hugs and kisses and am told that I'm "the best mom in the world and (they) don't ever want another." So, I think I did something right.

    The method you choose to feed your baby and how long mother and child (people seem to forget that many extended nursers do so because they take the child's opinion and feelings into account) are personal decisions. You don't have to agree with it, but neither are you the authority on which all parents should stop doing X. And to imply that a mother is nursing past one for her own benefit is insulting and shows your lack of intelligence on the matter.

    Would you agree, though, that attachment parenting does not have to include EBF? I have done attachment parenting with all four of my kids, but the longest I nursed any of them was 12 monhts (12 months for the oldest, 10 months for the next two, and still nursing the baby). They seem very well adjusted and I get told that I'm the best mom in the world, too. So, to me, the EBF part of attachment parenting seems to be optional.

    Yes, I would most certainly agree and would never push a mom to breastfeed if she is unable or really does not want to.
  • JennaM222
    JennaM222 Posts: 1,996 Member
    The kid is 3, not 4.

    thanks for the correction-even at 3 years old-its disgusting. Not breast feeding itself-just at that age and the cover was just disturbing.

    I agree.

    oh, but its less disgusting to give your kids milk from a cow teet? hmm. intersting. or a toddler mixed formula from some big company that has killed children in 3rd world countries for greed...yup, im talking Nestle.

    I never said any of those things. And I have also never seen a kid sucking on a cow teet. What I do THINK is that 3, 4, 5, even 2 years old is too old to still be breast feeding. I think it is more for the mother, than the child at that point. Again, Just my opinion. I believe it was Sigmund Freud who did alot of studies about breast feeding and effects it can have on a child later in life.

    Anyways...my person opinion is if your kid is walking and talking, he should be off the teet.

    and, Cheers to all the mothers out there. It is a tough job :)
  • Amaywil
    Amaywil Posts: 44
    Hmmmm , my 8 month old can say Dadadadadadadada when his dad gets home from work ( so he can speak ) My 8 month old can chew small bites of food ( so I guess he can eat ) My 8 month old can also sign for milk using baby sign language so I guess he can ask for milk . Guess I should be weaning him now ?
  • sherri85
    sherri85 Posts: 148 Member
    I think if a mother is not harming her child it is totally her business how she raises her child. Hers and the babies father of course. However with that being said I think it is ridiculous and totally not necessary to breast feed a child that long. But whatever floats your boat.. It is sooooo no ones business but their own.. :ohwell:
  • mommy7
    mommy7 Posts: 153
    I nurse my 2.5 year old. No biggie.

    However, this cover is crap. A kid who looks much older standing on a chair sucking mom's boob. Mom has that smirk. Then it says "Are you Mom enough?".

    I think she looks like a fool and is making a mockery of those who practice extended breastfeeding. I think she is also going to inflame those we already deal with who shun it.That is NOT a typical sitting at home nursing shot, so it's going to just make people more uncomfortable. Way to go Mommy Blogger!
  • butterfli7o
    butterfli7o Posts: 1,319 Member
    I think the only reason the cover was gross was because of the way the two were posed. It was posed as a sexual looking scene rather than a natural, nuturing moment.

    Seriously, I know the kid was 3 but he looks like he could be 6. And he's standing on a chair sucking on his mother's naked breast.

    I feel it' sperfectly normal to do this inpubic until a certain age, but I don't feel a large child should be sucking on their mother's breast. By that age they are exposed to tv, video games and realize what things are sexualized.

    ^All this! This cover was for pure shock value. Instead of making it look natural, they made it stand out and just look...wrong. I'm sorry, I'm a mom, and to each their own, but I too think that at this point it's more for the mother than for the child.
  • dls06
    dls06 Posts: 6,774 Member
    The child need to learn how to self soothe. I think its more about the mother not being able to let go.
    And the pose the women is doing in the picture does not look like a loving nurturing mother.
  • va_va_voom
    va_va_voom Posts: 467 Member
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.



    ^^^^^^^^this^^^^^^^^^

    i am a mother. and i also have to say, at that age, or after 1yr, has NOTHING to do with the child anymore, this has everything to do about her. research.

    Really, then why does WHO and Unicef recommend breastfeeding till at least the age of 2? The APA, on the other hand recommends to do it for at least the first year. Benefits from breastmilk don't have a magical cut off date. It may not be your cup of tea, but implying that after age 1 there are no benefits for the child and that it must be an issue on the mother is incorrect.

    But, didn't you know that breastmilk turns to water at that magical age of 12 months??

    I breastfed both of my daughters, the oldest until she was 3.5 and the youngest until she was 2.5. They're both happy, socially adjusted girls. Did the attachment parenting help? I'd like to think it did. It certainly didn't hurt and I doubt they were scarred by the experience. I still get lots of hugs and kisses and am told that I'm "the best mom in the world and (they) don't ever want another." So, I think I did something right.

    The method you choose to feed your baby and how long mother and child (people seem to forget that many extended nursers do so because they take the child's opinion and feelings into account) are personal decisions. You don't have to agree with it, but neither are you the authority on which all parents should stop doing X. And to imply that a mother is nursing past one for her own benefit is insulting and shows your lack of intelligence on the matter.

    Would you agree, though, that attachment parenting does not have to include EBF? I have done attachment parenting with all four of my kids, but the longest I nursed any of them was 12 monhts (12 months for the oldest, 10 months for the next two, and still nursing the baby). They seem very well adjusted and I get told that I'm the best mom in the world, too. So, to me, the EBF part of attachment parenting seems to be optional.

    Yes, I would most certainly agree and would never push a mom to breastfeed if she is unable or really does not want to. But, neither will I stand idly by while ignorant comments about extended breastfeeding are thrown around and the women who choose to follow their child's cues are called pedophiles for such actions.

    I was just curious about your thoughts on EBF vs. not EBF. What you do about the comments being flung around are your business. lol
  • rossi02
    rossi02 Posts: 549 Member
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.



    ^^^^^^^^this^^^^^^^^^

    i am a mother. and i also have to say, at that age, or after 1yr, has NOTHING to do with the child anymore, this has everything to do about her. research.

    Really, then why does WHO and Unicef recommend breastfeeding till at least the age of 2? The APA, on the other hand recommends to do it for at least the first year. Benefits from breastmilk don't have a magical cut off date. It may not be your cup of tea, but implying that after age 1 there are no benefits for the child and that it must be an issue on the mother is incorrect.

    But, didn't you know that breastmilk turns to water at that magical age of 12 months??

    I breastfed both of my daughters, the oldest until she was 3.5 and the youngest until she was 2.5. They're both happy, socially adjusted girls. Did the attachment parenting help? I'd like to think it did. It certainly didn't hurt and I doubt they were scarred by the experience. I still get lots of hugs and kisses and am told that I'm "the best mom in the world and (they) don't ever want another." So, I think I did something right.

    The method you choose to feed your baby and how long mother and child (people seem to forget that many extended nursers do so because they take the child's opinion and feelings into account) are personal decisions. You don't have to agree with it, but neither are you the authority on which all parents should stop doing X. And to imply that a mother is nursing past one for her own benefit is insulting and shows your lack of intelligence on the matter.

    Would you agree, though, that attachment parenting does not have to include EBF? I have done attachment parenting with all four of my kids, but the longest I nursed any of them was 12 monhts (12 months for the oldest, 10 months for the next two, and still nursing the baby). They seem very well adjusted and I get told that I'm the best mom in the world, too. So, to me, the EBF part of attachment parenting seems to be optional.

    I think there are many components to attachment parenting and don't feel you have to have a check mark by each of them to say that your parenting mode fits the attachment parenting concept.

    Bascially, that was a long way to say I don't feel you have to EBF past the age of one or two to fall into the attachement parenting catagory. :)
  • jenluvsushi
    jenluvsushi Posts: 933 Member
    There is nothing wrong or weird about nuring a three year old......a three year old still drinking from a bottle bothers me more than a three year old nursing actually!
  • leomom72
    leomom72 Posts: 1,797 Member
    i think it's way too old, but the family is the one to deal with all the **** yet to come:noway:
  • Bmontgomery613
    Bmontgomery613 Posts: 200 Member
    Hmmmm , my 8 month old can say Dadadadadadadada when his dad gets home from work ( so he can speak ) My 8 month old can chew small bites of food ( so I guess he can eat ) My 8 month old can also sign for milk using baby sign language so I guess he can ask for milk . Guess I should be weaning him now ?

    Using some of the logic on here, since your baby can ask for his dad, you should take his dad away. I mean, if he's asking for Dad, then he's certainly too old.
  • BumbyDog
    BumbyDog Posts: 70 Member
    I didn't breastfeed my first but plan on trying again with my next. I think the only reason the cover was gross was because of the way the two were posed. It was posed as a sexual looking scene rather than a natural, nuturing moment.

    Seriously, I know the kid was 3 but he looks like he could be 6. And he's standing on a chair sucking on his mother's naked breast.

    I feel it' sperfectly normal to do this inpubic until a certain age, but I don't feel a large child should be sucking on their mother's breast. By that age they are exposed to tv, video games and realize what things are sexualized.

    I agree. I've no problem with the woman breastfeeding her child til whatever age she feels is appropriate. I don't understand why she agreed to such a sexualised pose though. It totally takes from her own argument. So, it's the posed, sexualised photo and not the breastfeeding itself that's the problem.
  • Snow__White
    Snow__White Posts: 1,650 Member
    Pump it and put it in a cup...you wouldn't keep giving a 3-7 year old milk in a bottle

    I would and i did ha ha
  • Sockimobi
    Sockimobi Posts: 541
    I'm interested in the way the little boy is just sort of hanging off his Mum's breast with his arms down by his side whilst staring down the camera lens. I wonder if this was how he was told to stand?

    I imagine that usually he'd have his arms round his Mum and getting a nice cuddle at the same time? It would have been nice to see how they really go about this - unless he really does stand on a chair, arms aloof whilst staring at other people?

    There is just something about the eye contact the child is making with the veiwer that makes me scratch my head.
  • ladybg81
    ladybg81 Posts: 1,553 Member
    I think it is the picture itself that is disturbing to me. Not how old the kid is or anything else. Bfeeding is the most natural thing in the world. Each parent has their own ideas of how they want to raise their children and no one should judge that. However, I think the picture, in and of itself, is what is truly disturbing.
  • buzzcogs
    buzzcogs Posts: 296 Member
    From what I have seen, it is supplemental. The kids are eating real food and nursing whenever they feel the need which is typically emotionally driven, not hunger driven.

    Mommy becomes a living binkie.

    I love that expression "living binkie" you are spot on with that. I breast fed my daughter until she was 2 and son until he was 1 (he never had that much interest in it). I think for my daughter she just liked the closeness of it. She was always my clingy little thing and my son was much less of a clingy baby.
    I think the cover was a little in your face and over the top however. I breast fed and support it but I always thought it was better to be discreet about it.
  • xNJAx
    xNJAx Posts: 170 Member
    I'm not a mummy yet, but personally I don't understand why anyone would *want* a child that age sucking on their boob! In my opinion, if the child is old enough to 'ask' for it or bite off a nipple it's too old to have one in it's mouth! :noway:

    There are plenty of ways to give breast milk without continued breast-feeding!

    A baby asks for milk as soon as its shot out of its mummies belly, it will instinctively start to crawl towards the breast. At 4 months my son would pat my breasts for a feed, at 5 months he could sign for milk, six months he could say 'muk', when he was 1.5 he was asking for mummy milk, all 'asking' for it. Why should we stop our children. having what is naturally their right just because they can verbally communicate. As for biting off a nipple...haha!
    Annd 'wanting' to have a child suckling at that age..when you have a child its not about you anymore. Their needs come first, always,

    Sorry - I think you've misunderstood me. Let me explain...

    I realise babies and children ask to be fed from day one - that's why I said 'ask' rather than ask. What I had in mind when I wrote that was a documentary I watched a while ago where a child of about 8 was still being breast fed and was asking her mother for milk. The mother offered her child cow milk and the child said "I don't want that, I want your boob".

    I totally get that when you're a mother your children's needs come first, but parents still have choices and a child can still be given the benefits of breastmilk without the natural packaging!

    I'm not being critical of people who breastfeed older children, I'm just saying I personally don't understand it and think there are ways to get a compromise that suits mother AND child if they're of the same mind as me. The minute I have a child with teeth that milk will be going in a bottle! It makes no odds to me if other people want to do it differently.
  • thrld
    thrld Posts: 610 Member
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.

    Agree.