Help ladies before I punch someone... PLEASE

Sugar_Junkie

In need of opinions and please only serious ones. I have crazy mood swings (not just because I am a woman) and absolutely NO PATIENCE. Being a single parent is insanely hard to do sometimes add a bf that only gets off the couch to ask if I need help when I am half way done with everything I need to do, a full time job, a full time side business (the bf’s but we both run it), and all the other issues life randomly throws in your face, I don’t handle stress or change well. Anyway I have been to a couple different docs. One wants to try me on a bagillion different depression meds, which haven’t worked. They either make me so tired that I am sleeping my way through work or they interfere with other meds I take. End result I told her she was just pissing me off because she is treating me for depression which is not my issue—its ANXIETY lady good grief. So the next doc said diet and exercise, and cutting out some things. Ok doc, I exercise daily or at least 4 times a week, I cut out school to focus on my kid and work, and my diet is not bad overall. NONE of this has helped! Do any of you have any suggestions on what may help because I am at my whits end here…..:grumble:

Lauren8239

St. John's Wort. If your not taking any meds, this would help you with your anxiety and stress. I too am a single mother, and when my daughter was young and I was severely stressed out, this is what I tried and found it helped tremendously.
Hang in there. :flowerforyou:

kaned_ferret

On the medication side of things, it might be worth having a balanced conversation with your doctor - just because the medications are antidepressants, it doesn't mean they won't work for anxiety / stress. I am on antidepressants for that very reason. As for the side effects, it really depends on how long you were taking them for, as it can take some time to get used to them - I was a zombie for the first month of taking my current tablets, felt like I had the flu for the first few weeks and couldn't even get out of bed before the afternoon, but it has setlled for me now thankfully.

Meditation? Relaxation sessions? I found tai chi to be very theraputic a few years ago.

I'm probably not the best person to give advice, I'm a total stress head and haven't found a "happy place" for the entirety of my adult life! I always feel like I am just getting somewhere then something else piles on top of all the stress, but I just keep going regardless. Good luck!

dls06

As a mother of 4 I know what you are going through. I was told years ago it was Housewives syndrome. I could have punched the doctor but now that my kids are grown and I'm able to look back with an open mind, it was. Being a mother and a housewife is the toughest job you will ever have. You need to go back to the Doctor and find something that works. Sometimes it takes time to see results. Good luck.

beduffbrickie

have you tried a talking therapy? like CBT?

Klamber26

I do NOT advise this, but I keep a reserve pack of cigarettes in my car console for just that purpose. When life gets stressful I just take a few minutes to myself outside and I usually feel better.

Maybe if you could find something that completely relaxes you (hot bubble bath, eating your favorite little treat, etc. ), then no matter what time it is, if you start feeling overwhelmed you can just take a mini-break from life and do this thing. Then when you're done you'll hopefully have a clearer head.

But I have to ask, since this is MFP, do you think perhaps the anxiety is diet related? Are you on a deficit or did you maybe cut out carbohydrates?

2143661

St. John's Wort. If your not taking any meds, this would help you with your anxiety and stress. I too am a single mother, and when my daughter was young and I was severely stressed out, this is what I tried and found it helped tremendously.
Hang in there. :flowerforyou:

I was just about to recommend that! I take St. John's Wort every day and it has really improved my over all mood. I too have zero patience.

Sugar_Junkie

I do NOT advise this, but I keep a reserve pack of cigarettes in my car console for just that purpose. When life gets stressful I just take a few minutes to myself outside and I usually feel better.

Maybe if you could find something that completely relaxes you (hot bubble bath, eating your favorite little treat, etc. ), then no matter what time it is, if you start feeling overwhelmed you can just take a mini-break from life and do this thing. Then when you're done you'll hopefully have a clearer head.

But I have to ask, since this is MFP, do you think perhaps the anxiety is diet related? Are you on a deficit or did you maybe cut out carbohydrates?

I know I have a vitamin d definency-- my diary is open, and as i said the past two weeks havent been good but your free to look back at it and see if that could be a factor. I never thought about it being diet related tho

Sugar_Junkie

St. John's Wort. If your not taking any meds, this would help you with your anxiety and stress. I too am a single mother, and when my daughter was young and I was severely stressed out, this is what I tried and found it helped tremendously.
Hang in there. :flowerforyou:

I was just about to recommend that! I take St. John's Wort every day and it has really improved my over all mood. I too have zero patience.

This sounds like a cheaper alternative to depression meds and I assume it doesnt have all the crazy side effects?.?. I may try this to see if it helps. Thank you

Sugar_Junkie

have you tried a talking therapy? like CBT?

I used to see a therapist, tho I am not sure what CBT is. It did help having a non-bias party to talk to about things, but $$$$ is an issue when it comes to things like that .

rprussell2004

Yoga?

Tdk4685

I went to the dr for anxiety and all they wanted to do is fill me with pills. I didnt want that and they didnt help either so a friend suggested acupuncture. So I started going to the acupuncture dr and yes they treat anxiety. The very first visit I was so much better already it was amazing. I had to go for about 15 more visits until I felt I was done so that can be costly but I would suggest at least once or twice to see if it helps you. Now I go back every other month or so just to keep myself in balance.

buffybabe

St. John's Wort. If your not taking any meds, this would help you with your anxiety and stress. I too am a single mother, and when my daughter was young and I was severely stressed out, this is what I tried and found it helped tremendously.
Hang in there. :flowerforyou:

I actually was going to suggest this or passionflower extract. I personally make a passionflower/vervain tea and it really helps me feel very relaxed. Also, if you have trouble sleeping, I would go with a tea made with jamaican dogwood. It's not very tasty so I usually put cinnamon and honey in it, but it helps me sleep SO well.

marynmarty

I can feel ya....I was diagnosed with Genralized Aniexty Disorder back when I was in college. I got some help for it and now all I do is I just have to realize certain situations aren't worth fighting or worring about. It's very hard and my Aniexty kicks in ALL THE TIME. I have realized that when I started this journey with my weight loss that my aniexty has went down soooo much and I'm way more happier now. It still shows it's ugly face but I can better control it now. I do agree with your doctor about the exercise and eating right. I had to go on pills for it when I was in college and it did the same to me with being sleepy. I was told that if they make you sleepy then you don't need them so I went off of them. It's just something you have to learn to live with and just take one day at a time. Good luck with everything and just breathe when you feel it kick it!! Thinking about you!

mississippi_queen

I've found sometimes it helps to just go ahead and punch somone.... :mad:

But if that's not an option, I would say go find a new doctor. It sounds like the one you have is not listening to you, and how you feel, at all. Find someone who actually takes your opinion into account.

Snow__White

well what kind of anxiety do you have?
social anxiety?
panic attacks?
specific phobias?
OCD ?
PTSD?
Generalized anxiety disorder?
what meds have you tried and for how long?

Emancipated_Tai

Maybe you need a new boyfriend. One that can do s*it and actually run his own business. That's probably about 50% of your stress right there.

Nigerianebony

This is a personal question. But I know quite a few people who have experienced this. Are you on birth control? I know sometimes certain new birth controls can affect moods.

Also, there are some people who naturally worry a lot. It seems like you are a very reliable and dependent person. You have taken on a lot. So there are people , if you don't have control or if they feel like they can't get things done, they begin to worry or suffer from anxiety. The people around you take advantage of that. Unfortunately, it they have been this way since they were young, it will stick with them as they get older. I am not a therapist, but a therapist should be able to point this out.

Tangerine302

Sometimes when you feel stressed or overwhelmed it helps to make a list of things you need to get done. Sometimes everything you have to get done is in your head and you are going from one thing to another. If I make a list, it takes a lot of my mind, and you can cross of as you go. Kind of a feeling of letting some things leave your mind once they are on paper. I don't know if it makes sense, but it helps sometimes. You can go from the most important to the least. Hope you can feel better very soon!

Emancipated_Tai

I've found sometimes it helps to just go ahead and punch somone.... :mad:

THIS!!

debbies807

Are you taking a birth control? My daughter-in-law was on a birth control (sorry don't know which one) and she was having terrible mood swings and getting irritated very easily. She got off the and it's a night and day difference. If you are you might want to do some research on it. Only thing that comes to mind atm.

Good Luck

Articeluvsmemphis

I have advice, it's all spiritual though, so if you want it feel free to inbox me.

ediesmommy

In all honesty, the first thing I would lose is the couch potato boyfriend. You seem to have enough stress in your life. Get rid of some of it. He's good for at least, what, maybe 180lbs of it?? Then you need to re-analyze and re-prioratize. How much time and energy is the "side business" using up, and how much actual income is it bringing in? You have enough on your plate. Before I turn to meds or anything, I would simplify and see where you are then.

SarahLee10

odd question, but are you on birth control pills? I had to switch pills about 5-6 years because whatever the hormanal compound was just did not agree with me. I wanted to slap anyone who looked at me funny. I hope you find the answers you need. Good Luck!

lokun1

Since punching someone can have some really negative repercussions (even though it would feel SO GOOD) why not try something just as physical? Zumba is a great stress buster for me ~ when I was younger I did kick-boxing which wore off all the stress & had the added benefit of actual contact with the heavy bag or sparring partner

You can also try a good balanced multi-vitamin + a B-complex (150mg). That has helped me a lot with the lack of energy issues. If you are going the herbal route, make sure you get it from a reputable source since they are not regulated by the FDA and have been known to have issues with potency levels and unlabeled additives.

wickedcricket

first of all, breathe. Your drs are NOT trying to harm you, they are trying to help. What you're describing are SYMPTOMS, NOT your actual illness (experience) Your brain is producing little, or NO serotonin. THIS is causing your symptoms. When our brains stop making serotonin, they are INCAPABLE of fixing this WITHOUT MEDICATION. period. so you need medication. Serotonin uptake meds DO NOT work overnight. It takes time- 4 to 6 weeks before you begin to feel better. Remember, your ILLNESS is fighting this- YOUR ILLNESS DOES NOT WANT TO GO AWAY.
Discuss this with your drs. Take your anti-depressant and CAREFULLY track side-effects - they will change the ones not working until they find one that DOES work with fewer side-effects. HOWEVER - a CHANGE is taking place in your brain & your body, there are going to be SOME side effects until you stabilize. Ask your doctor for anti-anxiety meds for every day in the meantime symptoms. for example, I was taking Paxil (anti depressant) daily then ativan for anxiety.
Channel your aggression - work out, punch a bag ... USE that energy in a positive way. Journal. This saved my sanity. Write about how you feel - get it out - don't hold stuff in.
If individual therapy is too expensive, you can possibly find a group therapy program for little or nothing. Even just going to AA meetings and talking will help.
It helped me immensely to research my illness. I read everything I can get my hands on to try to understand myself.
Try to understand - YOUR BRAIN, NOT YOUR DOCTORS, is your enemy right now. and punching someone does not help anything and just gets you a reputation that will haunt you the rest of your life. don't be me.
Get well, feel better - we're here for you!
and PS - I was just looking at this article this morning - check it out
http://www.realage.com/major-depression-mdd/self-help-for-major-depression

ickybella

I have some very real anger issues/mood swings like you but I am finally learning to control this stuff. Find a therapy. If you can't pay for one (I can't) then figure out something you can do that is like therapy. Maybe just take half an hour out of your day for some "me" time, start a journal or even a blog. Read, make a video blog, get some sort of hobby. Yoga helps some people. It won't be easy and you'll probably go through phases of doing better and then going all hulk on everyone you meet and then doing better again, but eventually it's something you can work out.

You might be entirely different, but I can be really defensive. The hardest thing to figure out was that not everyone is out to get me and maybe I am actually overreacting. It freaking sucks having to take a look at yourself from this point of view, but it helps so much. I hope you can work through it!

Juliet_622

have you tried a talking therapy? like CBT?

I used to see a therapist, tho I am not sure what CBT is. It did help having a non-bias party to talk to about things, but $$$$ is an issue when it comes to things like that .

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. It's a type of psychotherapy that is often used for anxiety, depression, eating disorders, etc.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_behavioral_therapy

evita6983

Sometimes when you feel stressed or overwhelmed it helps to make a list of things you need to get done. Sometimes everything you have to get done is in your head and you are going from one thing to another. If I make a list, it takes a lot of my mind, and you can cross of as you go. Kind of a feeling of letting some things leave your mind once they are on paper. I don't know if it makes sense, but it helps sometimes. You can go from the most important to the least. Hope you can feel better very soon!

I LIVE off of my lists!! Between work, being a mom, running a business and just the regular life stuff, I get easily overwhelmed. Making lists takes all the stress out of my head and puts it into reality of what needs to get done. If I don't write it down, I'm constantly thinking that I have to do this or remember that. Mental stress is exhausting!

Contrary03

First, let me give you a big ((hug))
When my boys were 3yr & 3 mos i instantly became a single mother one day. Thought i was going to lose my mind! I know how you feel. Trying to keep up with the house and all the bills, work full time & take care of little ones ALL on your own can be overwhelming to say the least. I was either crying all the time or screaming at my toddler and was a total B#$tch! I ran to the doctor and asked for an anti-depressant. Did NOTHING for me. All i can say is, do your best and if you feel a meltdown coming on, put yourself in timeout! Keep the mantra "This too, shall pass".... and trust me, it will:flowerforyou:

Elizabeth_C34

I have some very real anger issues/mood swings like you but I am finally learning to control this stuff. Find a therapy. If you can't pay for one (I can't) then figure out something you can do that is like therapy. Maybe just take half an hour out of your day for some "me" time, start a journal or even a blog. Read, make a video blog, get some sort of hobby. Yoga helps some people. It won't be easy and you'll probably go through phases of doing better and then going all hulk on everyone you meet and then doing better again, but eventually it's something you can work out.

You might be entirely different, but I can be really defensive. The hardest thing to figure out was that not everyone is out to get me and maybe I am actually overreacting. It freaking sucks having to take a look at yourself from this point of view, but it helps so much. I hope you can work through it!

I had the same problem in my early 20's. I was pissed off most of the time.

Eventually you realize it's a huge waste of energy and time, but it takes a lot of work to get there. Just keep doing things you enjoy and try to not think the worst of others.