Looking For Good Smelling Friends

ThePinkPachyderm
ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
edited December 2024 in Introduce Yourself
I have recently cut a few friends from my list, mainly just because they smelled really really bad. I can usually tolerate one really, but the second one.. that is where I draw the line. So I have 5 slots to fill. One of these could be you, but I need to know that you aren't smelly. So the first 5 people that can prove to me that you don't smell like the left butt cheek of a passive aggressive orangutan, will get to be on my friends list.
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Replies

  • chubby_checkers
    chubby_checkers Posts: 2,352 Member
    What if you smell like the right testicle of an overly aggressive chimpanzee?
  • Unknown
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  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    What if you smell like the right testicle of an overly aggressive chimpanzee?

    That would depend on the age of the chimpanzee in question...
  • ickybella
    ickybella Posts: 1,438 Member
    Firstly, what's happening?! Secondly, I've never seen an orangutan's butt cheek. I'm not even sure those exist but I will tell you I smell magical, like unicorn blood and smugness.
  • GasMasterFlash
    GasMasterFlash Posts: 2,206 Member
    maybe your pregnant my wife said a smeled bad when she was pregnant
  • TK266
    TK266 Posts: 3,638 Member
    the left butt cheek of a passive aggressive orangutan

    have you been checking out the colones in my bathroom?
  • chubby_checkers
    chubby_checkers Posts: 2,352 Member
    That would depend on the age of the chimpanzee in question...

    It's roughly equivalent to a 15 year old human.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    *closes legs*


    sorry....
  • acg1305
    acg1305 Posts: 224 Member
    Oh, add me...please :indifferent:
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    Firstly, what's happening?! Secondly, I've never seen an orangutan's butt cheek. I'm not even sure those exist but I will tell you I smell magical, like unicorn blood and smugness.

    Do you mean what's happening in the literal sense or are you speaking in street lingo for "how are you?". The intent of your question drastically changes my ability and willingness to provide an accurate answer.
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    maybe your pregnant my wife said a smeled bad when she was pregnant

    That would explain the swelling in my midsection... and the cravings for cheese stuffed pickles
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    You know, the compliments I get most -- and have my whole life -- are that I have beautiful hair and that I smell good.

    You're welcome to take a sniff.
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    That would depend on the age of the chimpanzee in question...

    It's roughly equivalent to a 15 year old human.

    Unfortunately the only acceptable chimp testicle scent age ranges are 0 - 10, 21 - 33, and 52.
  • ickybella
    ickybella Posts: 1,438 Member
    Firstly, what's happening?! Secondly, I've never seen an orangutan's butt cheek. I'm not even sure those exist but I will tell you I smell magical, like unicorn blood and smugness.

    Do you mean what's happening in the literal sense or are you speaking in street lingo for "how are you?". The intent of your question drastically changes my ability and willingness to provide an accurate answer.

    I meant in the literal sense. I'm not Joey from Friends.
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    the left butt cheek of a passive aggressive orangutan

    have you been checking out the colones in my bathroom?

    Yes, you have quite an extensive collection of Old Spice varieties
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    Oh, add me...please :indifferent:

    You did say please. Smelly people rarely say please.. so your story seems to check out...
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
    My farts smell like organic strawberries. That is all I need to say about that.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I wear deodorant everyday. Can I be on friends list please? :flowerforyou:
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    You know, the compliments I get most -- and have my whole life -- are that I have beautiful hair and that I smell good.

    You're welcome to take a sniff.

    Wait ... I have been lured in to the "come smell this, it's amazing" trap before ....
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    You know, the compliments I get most -- and have my whole life -- are that I have beautiful hair and that I smell good.

    You're welcome to take a sniff.

    Wait ... I have been lured in to the "come smell this, it's amazing" trap before ....

    Me, too ... Never a pleasant experience, is it?
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    I meant in the literal sense. I'm not Joey from Friends.

    Well in the literal sense of what is happening, I The Pink Pachyderm have embarked on a mission to reach my personal cut off level of 90 friends due to a recent culling of some undesirables. Due to my strong sense of smell and values around personal hygiene, I wish to have friends with similar interests and body odors. As such I have made a post on a diet and fitness website call My Fitness Pal, requesting non smelly people to apply for friendship. And that pretty much brings us to the discourse witnessed above.
  • _Timmeh_
    _Timmeh_ Posts: 2,096 Member
    I smell like aloe vera, mainly because I slathered it on myself this morning.
    Some like the smell some don't.
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    My farts smell like organic strawberries. That is all I need to say about that.

    Wait .. organic farms typically use a lot of sheep manure ... it is arguably the worst smelling of all manures ....
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    I wear deodorant everyday. Can I be on friends list please? :flowerforyou:

    Sorry, I am not a fan of people cheating their way to results. I want people that smell good naturally, not because they bought some product that claims to make them less smelly without all the hard work of showering...
  • supermom2002
    supermom2002 Posts: 180 Member
    maybe your pregnant my wife said a smeled bad when she was pregnant

    That would explain the swelling in my midsection... and the cravings for cheese stuffed pickles

    cheese stuffed pickles???!!! Where do i get these?? No i'm not pregnant. And I always smell fabulous.
  • ThePinkPachyderm
    ThePinkPachyderm Posts: 140 Member
    Me, too ... Never a pleasant experience, is it?

    Well there was that one time ..... it smelled like citrus .......
  • _Elemenopee_
    _Elemenopee_ Posts: 2,665 Member
    I'm a scratch-n-sniff kinda gal...try it out
  • Feed_the_Bears
    Feed_the_Bears Posts: 275 Member
    Lol. I like your style. But how can I really prove to you that I'm not smell? You'll never really know will you? If you looked at my food diary you'd see that I do enjoy a good helping of beans and chilli. That doesn't help my case. The carbonated mineral water I love doesn't help either. It just adds gas to the fire! What can I say?

    I do have a very nice performe, the one that Jenifer Lopez endorses. I can't remember what it's called, but you can test that out in any department store and see if you like the smell.

    I'd like to think that I'm not metaphorically smelly either. I try not to leave a bad taste in your mouth. But I love this site, so I do tend to linger :|
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    You can smell their butts through the computer. Maybe that's your *kitten* your smelling. You sound like a complete idiot. Get a life!!!

    YEAH!
  • _Elemenopee_
    _Elemenopee_ Posts: 2,665 Member
    You can smell their butts through the computer. Maybe that's your *kitten* your smelling. You sound like a complete idiot. Get a life!!!

    And you sound like a turd....plunk
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