To the mums out there - how do you manage

nishsuz

Ok so my PT has told me to come gym 5 times a week. He said its possible and im making excuses.

I work 9-3pm for 4 days and until 5 on one day. This is in between school hours. The boys (age 8 and nearly 7) have mountains of homework to do, with reading and handwriting practice, etc. Also i like to keep the house to a certain 'standard' otherwise i just feel uneasy (im not super OCD, but i like things tidy and in there places). On top of that, theres cooking, and healthy cooking seems to be the thing that sometimes takes forever to prepare! Then theres laundry, ironing, grocery shopping twice a week, going to the butchers for meats and preparing that, changing bedcovers, etc etc I don’t need to continue but you know how it is.

So how am I supposed to fit gym in 5 times a week AND have the energy and motivation to do so and come out feeling like I’ve had a quality workout. I also tend to feel so guilty when my husband gets home and I shoot out, especially if the boys are being hard work. Or if the boys have a pile of homework or just want me to ‘cuddle with them’.

How do I manage? My PT says im not determined enough and I need to work harder. How?

dollipop

Your PT is meant to motivate you, not make you feel like you're not dedicated enough.
I doubt he has any concept of what it's like to be a working mum. Hell, I'd love to go to the gym 5 times a week, but it's just not possible. What is realistic for you?
Edited to add: because I'm obviously making excuses... What about adding in something you can do at home, or with the kids, for your calorie burn?

MLgarcia3

A one hour workout is only 4% of your day. You just have to find the time.. Move things around or save it for another day. Before I found a gym with a daycare, I was waking up at 4:30am to get to the gym at 5am.. On days when I can't make it during the day, I go at night. There's always time for a workout.. People that say there isn't are just making excuses, in my opinion.

CharlieJuliette

It's hard. Really hard. But you can find the time if you really want to. I have two daughters, ages 8 and 6, and I work 5 days a week. I get up early 3 mornings a week to do an hour of cardio, and 3 evenings a week I do strength training after the kids have gone to bed. I do all my exercising from home because I really wouldn't have time if I factored in a drive to the gym as well! Some days the house is a tip and I hate that. And some days I'm so tired by 10pm I can't even string a sentence together! But you do it if you think it's worth it I guess.

Tamaralea88

Tell your PT that you are a mother, and he is an idiot lol j/p honestly, he doesnt know what it is like to be a mother, so he wont understand how much stress a mother has to put up with! I am not going to sit here and tell you what to do, but he needs to back off a little, there is only 24 hrs in a day, which isnt much when you are fitting sleep somewhere in there as well

nishsuz

A one hour workout is only 4% of your day. You just have to find the time.. Move things around or save it for another day. Before I found a gym with a daycare, I was waking up at 4:30am to get to the gym at 5am.. On days when I can't make it during the day, I go at night. There's always time for a workout.. People that say there isn't are just making excuses, in my opinion.

Dont you ever feel guilty though? I guess i need to learn how to get over that part of it.

Lizzie2As

I struggled to squeeze in exercise when I was working (started at 6am) & hadn't discovered Jillian Michaels Shred/Ripped DVD's either. 30 (ish) minutes of a decent work out start to end
Now, following redundancy, I am able to work out 5-6 times per week but I get up early to get it out of the way & not going to put it off. Plus I'm not taking time away from my other tasks (school run/homework/cleaning/looking after my toddler).

If I'm successful in finding a new job I shall continue to get up that little bit earlier to get it over with.

redundant33

I understand your problem. I stay home full time with my 2 year old son and nanny for my niece full time so I am on duty all of the time. I can't afford a gym membership but I am going to make it my goal to get in at least 30 minutes of exercise 3-4 days a week and I just tell myself that I will get it in when I can. Maybe if you just find a way to only to commit to, say, 15 minutes at the gym in a small window then as you get in to the habit of going at that time then you can start to shift your schedule around to allow for more time. I just keep telling myself that something is better than nothing, so if I jog in place for 5 minutes here in there then that is more than I was doing. I would just tell the PT to mind his own business and tell him that you make your choices for yourself and your family, not for him!

nishsuz

It's hard. Really hard. But you can find the time if you really want to. I have two daughters, ages 8 and 6, and I work 5 days a week. I get up early 3 mornings a week to do an hour of cardio, and 3 evenings a week I do strength training after the kids have gone to bed. I do all my exercising from home because I really wouldn't have time if I factored in a drive to the gym as well! Some days the house is a tip and I hate that. And some days I'm so tired by 10pm I can't even string a sentence together! But you do it if you think it's worth it I guess.

Wow now thats dedication - how do you find the energy and motivation? I just cant seem to keep awake.

giddybutterfly

I am a mom of 4 (12,12,10 and 6), the kids are all on 2 sports teams and three of them also have an art class, I work full time and like you need to keep the house to a certain standard -- so I can relate to everything you are saying.

My husband and I have worked out the following agreement - we both need to have "gym" time but we cant scarifice the kids needs/family needs to have it. He uses the morning as his time (he gets up at 4:30 and works out before work - leaving the house by 7am) - I do the opposite and hit the gym at 8-8:30pm after the kids are back from practice, homework is done or well on its way. I cook dinner - he cleans up from dinner, I start homework with them - he finishes it, I take them to practices - he picks them up, with the little one we trade off who stays to watch her. He also coaches one of the kids sports teams so some days we adjust.

I exercise 5 days a week - Sat/Sun and three days of the week. That way on two busy weekdays I dont have to cram it in.

Your trainer is right - if you want it you will find time to do it. Not having time is not an excuse - your health is more important! good luck figuring out what works best for you!

MLgarcia3

A one hour workout is only 4% of your day. You just have to find the time.. Move things around or save it for another day. Before I found a gym with a daycare, I was waking up at 4:30am to get to the gym at 5am.. On days when I can't make it during the day, I go at night. There's always time for a workout.. People that say there isn't are just making excuses, in my opinion.

Dont you ever feel guilty though? I guess i need to learn how to get over that part of it.

Why should I feel guilty? My husband and children are happy and I get plenty of time with them because I make the time.

MLgarcia3

It's hard. Really hard. But you can find the time if you really want to. I have two daughters, ages 8 and 6, and I work 5 days a week. I get up early 3 mornings a week to do an hour of cardio, and 3 evenings a week I do strength training after the kids have gone to bed. I do all my exercising from home because I really wouldn't have time if I factored in a drive to the gym as well! Some days the house is a tip and I hate that. And some days I'm so tired by 10pm I can't even string a sentence together! But you do it if you think it's worth it I guess.

Wow now thats dedication - how do you find the energy and motivation? I just cant seem to keep awake.

Believe it or not, being fit makes you have much more energy.

Nikstergirl

I feel your pain. I work more hours than you and my hubby is on the road as a truck driver all week so it's just me and the two teenage boys most of the time. My house is NOT my priority, never has been, so I don't feel bad about messiness, but I love the kitchen to be cleaned up after every meal. I do laundry Sunday afternoon because I can relax a little and spend time as a family between loads.

Personally, it's all about planning. I started P90X at home seven weeks ago and that's been the best thing for me. I get up at 4:30 (yes, 4:30am) and work out, shower and then get the kids up while I have breakfast. After they get on the bus I finish getting ready and get to work at 8am. I work until either 5:30 or 7pm and then come home for dinner and pretty much just a little unwind time with the kids before bed, usually by 9:30-10pm. Tuesday evenings I run 2-4 miles after work while they do homework (they don't need as much help as yours might right now) or play with neighbor kids (they love to skateboard!). Since my kids are older they do fend for themselves a little, but I still try to have a healthy dinner for the three of us most nights. Snacks are up to them. I grocery shop on Thursday which is my day off from work or on Saturday if I have to after my long run (I'm always training for another race). Today will be an easy dinner of quick fixing turkey burgers (the patties are made and in the fridge) and salad. I buy packaged salad because it's quick and easy and I don't have to wash it. I buy frozen veggies and frozen chicken to have on hand every day. Somedays it's just chicken in the crockpot and come home to boil up some veggies and maybe some rice and dinner's ready. Somedays I have time to do more. My kids are simple eaters, they like meat and certain veggies. I'd love them to be more adventurous, but it's coming with time.

Good luck. I think you CAN work out 5 days a week, but for me, going to the gym was tough. I could do 3-4 days but not 5, but now I workout 6-7 days a week at home. It's not for everyone, but do what you can. Remember, nobody is judging your house or how you raise your kids but you. Seriously, the neighbors will not come over for a white glove test on your woodwork.... take care of you! Hard for a mom, I know, but you are important. If you're not healthy, how can you show your kids to be healthy? Just food for thought, no judgement here, I've been where you are. You're doing fine. Just try some new planning and scheduling. Find what works.

reallyregina

I have two kids and I can't go to a gym. I've recently made exercise a priority. I do what I can. If I have NO time. I just keep my body moving. If I'm cleaning the windows then I throw in squats. If I'm folding or ironing the laundry I walk in place. Same goes with cooking. I walk in place, throw in some kicks and punches, put on music and dance in the kitchen. Anything to keep my body moving.

If I have some time then I play Zumba wii which I LOVE. I also have some various dvds. Jillian Michaels, Tae Bo, and two Leslie Sansone walking DVDs. The walking ones are great workouts and definitely the best for easing back into getting into shape.

If the kids are playing outside then I throw in workouts there. I'll run laps while they play. I'll do step ups at the playground. Squats. Walking lunges. etc. At first I felt silly but did it anyway. After a while I no longer felt silly and have actually had other moms join me in my "playground" work outs.

When I have no motivation I assign one of my kids to be my "coach". I have a 6 and 4 year old and let me just say. They are tough! They will work me out as well as any trainer. They say things like do 5 push ups. Ok do 15 jumping jacks. Ok run 3 laps. Now 5 push ups. They love it too.

kittymoney

i am usually at the gym most days by 4:30 and workout until 5:45, because during school year my son struggles a lot with homework and with cooking supper and finding time to work with my daughter, I never can count on an evening workout. If get one in that is great then I doubled up for the day - this usually just an evening walk to include family time. I usually make extra meals on the weekend to cover some evenings during the week and I have to do is heat them up and they are ready. I spend most of time on weekends cleaning and not during the week, just pick up stuff during the week and I have the kids help out.

CharlieJuliette

It's hard. Really hard. But you can find the time if you really want to. I have two daughters, ages 8 and 6, and I work 5 days a week. I get up early 3 mornings a week to do an hour of cardio, and 3 evenings a week I do strength training after the kids have gone to bed. I do all my exercising from home because I really wouldn't have time if I factored in a drive to the gym as well! Some days the house is a tip and I hate that. And some days I'm so tired by 10pm I can't even string a sentence together! But you do it if you think it's worth it I guess.

Wow now thats dedication - how do you find the energy and motivation? I just cant seem to keep awake.

It's best not to think about it too much! I have those set times allocated to exercising so I just do it. It becomes habit after a while, but the first couple of weeks are tough.

Swissmiss

I do feel guilty for spending so much time at the gym but, I have to think of myself also...not just my children. What I do is go to the gym right after work. If I were to go home first, then all the stuff that has to be done there will keep me from the gym. One thing I did when my girls were younger was to take them along with me. They can use the exercise also and we got to spend time together.

Flab2fitfi

I dont go to the gym - To do an hour work out would take around 2 hours in total as I don't drive. What I do do is walk everywhere - some days i can burn over 900 calories just walking. I also try and do an exercise video in the evening a few times a week.

I know many say here that anyone can find the time but it is not always possible. I have four children including one under two. By the time hubby gets home and fed is after 8pm and then its time for me to study - which I cant do during the day with a toddler running around. At weekend we have upped the amount of activities we do which also helps.

I have been told that I should get up at 6 O'clock to go but as I have two children who don't sleep (* one has Autism) so sleep is a much needed commodity in this house.

twocsmom

I'm a teacher and a single working mom of two very busy kids. Translate: I am constantly on the go. For a long time I thought I didn't have time either, and I couldn't see where I was supposed to fit it into my day with homework, activities, house cleaning, etc.

But finally I made it work. I discovered if I got up early and worked out before anyone else was up that I did indeed have the time. And some afternoons I still squeeze in 30 minutes here and there. I work out at home though as I can't afford a gym and I don't have anyone to stay at home with the kids when if I were to go to the gym.

I don't think you are making excuses, I don't think you aren't determined enough, but I do think you need to make taking care of you your first priority. You'll be a better mom if you do. It will be hard at first but you must find time for you and your workouts!

janey1306

A one hour workout is only 4% of your day. You just have to find the time.. Move things around or save it for another day. Before I found a gym with a daycare, I was waking up at 4:30am to get to the gym at 5am.. On days when I can't make it during the day, I go at night. There's always time for a workout.. People that say there isn't are just making excuses, in my opinion.

Who was looking after your children at 4am? I know they were probably asleep but some one had to be with them. This lady may be a single parent

janey1306

Id work out at home if i was in your position, dvds, etc, you can buy small weight sets I got a cross trainer, in excellent condition off ebay for £10!

mummma

i would LOVE to go to the gym 5 times a week !! there are no excuses ! i have 3 children, they come first... above the gym every time.... i run 2 businesses... these businesses make the money that pays for my kids to be fed, watered clothed and sheltered. then theres those other things like you said.... food shopping.... washing... cleaning... the school run.... etc etc etc etc.... i work out at home.... and until my daily routine changes (youngest starts full time schooling etc) then there will be no time for gym

couponfun

I'm hoping to be able to get to the gym again soon. Kind of hard to find time when you're working 2 jobs FROM home, so everyone assumes you're sitting there doing nothing. Literally up at 2 am every day for work, and after all the work/chores etc are done wasn't getting to bed til 10.

Not everyone can find a "hidden" hour somewhere, so I think folks (especially professional trainers) need to be careful not to judge. Especially in today's economy you don't know what that person has going on and they might feel guilty enough.

dhakiyya

I don't think you're making excuses. It really sounds like you don't have the time to go to the gym 5x a week. I think exercising at home would be the best solution for you, unless there's a gym at work you can use in your lunch hour. Also you could still go for a walk or jog at lunchtime even if there's no gym. IMO your personal trainer should be helping you to find ways to fit exercising into your schedule (and it doesn't have to be at the gym) rather than accusing you of making excuses.

I have a treadmill in front of the TV and I go on that while watching TV quite a lot (generally after the kids are in bed), and do weights in my room, although that can be tricky sometimes because I can't do that unless someone else is watching the kids because I obviously don't want them anywhere near my dumbbells when there's a chance I may drop one.

Anyway it's not easy for us mothers, and there are ways to fit exercise in but you have to take into account your schedule, when you can fit it in,and another trick is to do little and often, e.g. try to fit in 3 ten minute workouts rather than one 30 minute workout, just because it's easier to find 10 minutes than 30 minutes.

Aleara2012

For me the best solution is to work-out at home. Only oyu know your prioroties and your schedule and only you can find a way to workout that works for YOU. And since you are doing htis for you and not for anybody else, jsut go with what you can do and fon't listen to people whose schedules and life situations are different from yours.

Vailara

I'm a working mother, and I couldn't manage that. If you have childcare after work it's a possibility, maybe, but it means time away from the children and I know just what you mean about wanting the time with them. At that age, I'd maybe be looking at taking up hobbies you can do together, such as cycling, badminton, orienteering, walking to the park,games, etc. When my son was little we used to go out on scooters or bikes, and I did some home weights and exercise videos. You only get so much time with them when they're little. I wish I'd had more than I did have.

MLgarcia3

A one hour workout is only 4% of your day. You just have to find the time.. Move things around or save it for another day. Before I found a gym with a daycare, I was waking up at 4:30am to get to the gym at 5am.. On days when I can't make it during the day, I go at night. There's always time for a workout.. People that say there isn't are just making excuses, in my opinion.

Who was looking after your children at 4am? I know they were probably asleep but some one had to be with them. This lady may be a single parent

My husband. He's military and has PT early in the morning, so I would go and get back before he left.

cramernh

My work week is 8am-4:30pm Monday through Friday (I work in a Financial office for a large physician/provider group of about 300+ physicians). I commute 20 minutes each way.

Im also a musician with two practices per week from 6pm-8pm: 2 concerts for one group, 12 concerts for the other group

I get up at 4am - out the door by 4:45am and at the gym by 4:55am. I work out for a minimum hour each day Monday through Friday.

During the week, I tidy up one room at a time. I do the cooking while my husband does the dishes. He helps me with the laundry if he is home first. I prepare my gym/work clothes for the next day.

Saturdays is cleaning day, grocery shopping day - come home to a clean home and get food prepping for the week and do bulk cooking. All the foods I cook in bulk, are broken down into meal-portions, dated, labeled and frozen.

Sundays is finish the remainder of laundry, prepare more food/bulk cooking, run errands, do the cooking, he does the dishes, etc.

To be honest, your boys are old enough to handle chores.. they can easily help make sure their rooms are cleaned, they can learn how to fold towels/hand towels, pair up socks, etc...

Your husband needs to step up here and assume the role of parent when he comes home from work so you can leave to let you take care of yourself. I dont know what 'dynamic' is involved if any, but youre not supposed to be doing it all. Let your husband cook dinner so you can go to the gym, let the husband experience what its like to sit at the table and help with homework when needed.

Why do you feel as though you have to do it all? Your post is screaming for Mom's time off really bad.

There is (IMHO) always time to get exercise - you just have to see the bigger picture in your home environment and realize, there are two of you with kids - hubby can pitch in....

omanitshann

Maybe you shouldn't go to the gym every time, and do at home workouts. There's plenty good workouts you can find online. Or maybe go to the gym over the weekends and then do at home workouts 3 days during the week, either bright and early in the morning or maybe after dinner? It's not going to be easy, but even if 5 is too much for you, try doing four or three times a week, that's still a decent amount

SPNLuver83

Screw the gym. Work out at home. MUCH easier when you have a busy life. Do it in the morning, after the kids get on the bus and before you go to work. OR wake up earlier and get it done before the kids wake up for school. It'll be hard at first but your body will adjust to the earlier time. Just get to bed a little earlier. Exercise in the morning and 1) things won't get in the way later and 2) it'll make you feel accomplished the rest of the day.

momjmd

Feel your pain. Our gym doesn't open until 5:30 and my hubby is out the door by 4:30 leaving me home with 3 kids to get dressed and on the bus in the a.m. before I go to work from 8-5, then baseball games, practices, gymnastics, and ballet. My daughter's ballet is at the YMCA so I work out while she is in ballet and that helps. Otherwise, the kids and I take the dog for a mile long walk (sometimes longer if time allows) around 8:30 p.m. - right before bedtime- it gives us some time together to talk and still allows me some time for exercise. In the mornings, I am taking the dog for a 15 min. walk. It isn't much but it is all I can do. Going to the YMCA everyday just isn't an option with our busy schedule but I have to get the exercise in somehow. Doing it with the kids is the best option for me.