OMGosh...REALLY!!!

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24

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  • gomisskellygo
    gomisskellygo Posts: 635 Member
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    I did all of the things listed and was working outside the home. Kind of resent the implication that working moms don't care as much about their family. That is just as stupid as saying stay at homes don't work hard.

    Yup.
  • Katbaran
    Katbaran Posts: 605 Member
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    >>I respect all the moms out there who have to work outside the home and for those of us who don't I have just as much respect for as it is a lot harder than people think! Anyone else get this??? <<

    This. I have been both a working mom and a SAHM over the years. They are both hard but in different ways. A SAHM is cook, babysitter, laundress, chauffeur, bookkeeper, dispatcher, referee, gardener, housekeeper, homework helper, teacher, nurse and more.

    They both deserve respect. There doesn't have to be such hostility. We are all different and make our choices for different reasons and under different circumstances.
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
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    I'm a SAHM of 5. There are days when I wish I could go back to my corporate marketing job where someone would say, "Good job!" every now and again and pay me every 2 weeks. There are days, however, when I'm just overjoyed to be able to stay home. Yes, it's hard to stay home, but if I had to compare the two, I'd say staying home puts less overall stress on the entire family. The working parent doesn't need to spend his/her off time doing as many chores since the at home parent took care of most of them while he/she was working. As a SAHM I find myself being more naturally fugal since I don't feel the need to reward myself by buying things because I'm so darned tired and worn out from working AND keeping a home. Because my husband and I each have separate responsibilities, we both seem to have a little more energy than was my experience in a double-income home with kids.

    I do also like that I have the time to train for a half marathon right now. Let's face it, with kids, if you work outside the home, odds are you don't have the time to devote to athletics unless all your kids are in school and you work shifts or something. I'll admit I'm looking forward to my 2 year old eventually starting school :D I'm going to take up wind surfing during school hours.

    Life's too short to argue...
  • Mindmovesbody
    Mindmovesbody Posts: 399 Member
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    So many people just don't cherish family as much as others and think that stay at home moms just sit on their hind ends and do nothing. Its very sad, I stayed at home while our kids were young and went to college as well. When they got older I started working on and off and still do. Stay at home moms cherish their family and family is number 1. So many people have forgotten that family is number 1. You are wonderful for staying at home and working at home because that is what a stay at home mom does she works from the time she gets up in the morning til the time she goes to bed.

    HUH??? You are essentially implying that working Moms do not cherish their families. That should have been better thought out and written. That sounds extremely ignorant. Some people cannot stay at home even if that is what they really want. SMH! :noway:
  • quill16
    quill16 Posts: 373 Member
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    I have been on both sides of this fence. I worked fulltime for 27 years and found time for family, hobbies,chores, Scout Leader, and general living. Now that I am retired for 10 years I can tell you I am still busy with exercising(1000 cals a day) family, chores,hobbies etc. You make time for what is important and prioritize. If your health is at stake because of obesity you need to put it first to take care of your needs so you can be around and in good health to take care of your family. I think too many Moms don't realize that it is perfectly OK to put themselves first in this regard. I have discovered that exercizing has given me back the energy tenfold I need to do the other tasks of daily living.
  • CountryMom03
    CountryMom03 Posts: 258 Member
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    And as far as the WM vs SAHM they BOTH work their tails off all day long, one is not better than the other and one does not love their families more than the other;) ((HUGS))
  • dad106
    dad106 Posts: 4,868 Member
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    My mother was a stay at home mom until I was old enough to be on my own.. then she went back to work..not because she had to but because she wanted to. I grew up just fine. I became independent around 11-12 because my mom was working 12 months(she worked in a school) a year, and instead of her doing my cooking/cleaning/laundry, I did it myself.. and helped put less stress on her then so she could get what she needed to done(like taking care of my father who has a lot of medical problems).

    There is not right or wrong way to raise a family.. and personally I feel that SAM and WM do the same amount of work at the end of the day, it's just different types of work.
  • MrsPatchon1837
    MrsPatchon1837 Posts: 22
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    AMEN SISTER. I love being a SAHM but it is hard work.....
  • xHelloQuincyx
    xHelloQuincyx Posts: 884 Member
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    on that note, i hate when people say all the things you do arnt a real job. or when i get "thats so cute" as a responce to me saying "I'm a preschool teacher." or "you must have so much patience" like its a chore for me to do what i love.... *sigh* there will alway be someone i suppose.
  • Christine1110
    Christine1110 Posts: 1,786 Member
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    I agree...and stayed home with my kids. I took care of everything also. Some people are to busy worrying about others, or maybe are jealous. I never let anyones opinon bother me....If they really cared about me they wouldn't be saying such garbage!!
  • utahgirl247
    utahgirl247 Posts: 370 Member
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    stay at home mom's work harder than most people who typically work...its called a 'domestic engineer' i'm right there with you girl!!
  • onyx1972
    onyx1972 Posts: 133 Member
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    1000 calorie burns are great, I unfortunately do not hit them often, but it is achievable... Martial Arts for an 1.5 hours and boom your there, so I think that statement that you must do nothing all day to achieve that kind of burn is ridiculous... Also I am not a parent, and domestic engineering is not my strongest suit by no means... but it is a hard job and to anyone who does it and does it well with pride I commend you.
  • jnerdin
    jnerdin Posts: 39 Member
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    You have a point. I work full time as a corporate attorney and I exercise an average of two hours a day, mostly because I ride my bike to and from work (about 40-45 minutes each way). Plus, I can go to the gyms downstairs in my office building and work out during lunch. My wife is the primary caregiver for our three daughters and it is definitely more difficult for her to find the time to go to the gym and workout.
  • drusilla126
    drusilla126 Posts: 478 Member
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    I watched my mom as a kid and I still can't fathom doing everything she did as a stay at home mom. I honestly think that maybe if we lived in a society where most households didn't need two incomes to survive things would be better for the children and such. So many kids are almost raising themselves because their parents are always working. Sad.
  • Mom0fTwo
    Mom0fTwo Posts: 326 Member
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    I remember reading an article that if a mom was to get paid for the things that she does it would be something like 360,000 dollars a year, cause we are a 24 hr/day nurse, and teacher, an in home accountant and personal shopper, 24hr/day maid, personal driver, and on and on...it isn't an easy task, and to top it all off i have a part-time job working which i started recently and therefore i am also slightly more sleep deprived while doing all of this, so ya i hear you big time!!!
  • marywanoKC
    marywanoKC Posts: 176
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    A SAHM is cook, babysitter, laundress, chauffeur, bookkeeper, dispatcher, referee, gardener, housekeeper, homework helper, teacher, nurse and more.
    Well, that's the thing, so do moms who also work outside the home. Those responsibilities don't just evaporate when you choose to work outside of the home. It's not like there's a magical Mom fairy that picks up where working moms are (sarcasm) clearly slacking off while they're selfishly not caring for their kids and choosing to make money.

    I'm not a mom, and I never want to be one, but I think ANYONE who can have a child and rear it the BEST way for that child and that family in order for them all to arrive at adulthood in one piece, respectful of other people, self aware, and productive deserves my respect.

    Why there's so much fighting about who deserves more respect and "props" is beyond my comprehension, but I suspect has something to do with SAHM's feeling insecure about their roles in society, which is simply ridiculous, because most working moms I know would never put down a SAHM in any way, shape, or form.
  • FlyByJuly
    FlyByJuly Posts: 564 Member
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    I did all of the things listed and was working outside the home. Kind of resent the implication that working moms don't care as much about their family. That is just as stupid as saying stay at homes don't work hard.

    I like this. When my daughters were growing up, I was a single mom (widow at the age of 24, with an almost 3-yr-old and a 2-month-old) and I worked full time and ran a household and raised my girls. I valued my family MORE than anything else, and providing for them is/was a huge part of caring for my family. Ya do what ya gotta do.
  • SuperCork
    SuperCork Posts: 192 Member
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    It seems like you mostly wanted a good vent, so I'm glad you got that, and you also got support from people in your position. I think that when people say boneheaded/insensitive/arrogant/etc. things to or about someone, it says everything about their character and nothing about your truth.
  • gomisskellygo
    gomisskellygo Posts: 635 Member
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    There is not right or wrong way to raise a family.. and personally I feel that SAM and WM do the same amount of work at the end of the day, it's just different types of work.

    Absolutely. Agree.

    With our first child, I worked nights.I lived the SHM lifestyle during the day. Playdates, games, park, cleaning, cooking, walks, bill paying, ect. It was hard work. I get it.

    A mothers work never ends. Whether its a paying position or not.
  • gomisskellygo
    gomisskellygo Posts: 635 Member
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    A SAHM is cook, babysitter, laundress, chauffeur, bookkeeper, dispatcher, referee, gardener, housekeeper, homework helper, teacher, nurse and more.
    Well, that's the thing, so do moms who also work outside the home. Those responsibilities don't just evaporate when you choose to work outside of the home. It's not like there's a magical Mom fairy that picks up where working moms are (sarcasm) clearly slacking off while they're selfishly not caring for their kids and choosing to make money.

    I'm not a mom, and I never want to be one, but I think ANYONE who can have a child and rear it the BEST way for that child and that family in order for them all to arrive at adulthood in one piece, respectful of other people, self aware, and productive deserves my respect.

    Why there's so much fighting about who deserves more respect and "props" is beyond my comprehension, but I suspect has something to do with SAHM's feeling insecure about their roles in society, which is simply ridiculous, because most working moms I know would never put down a SAHM in any way, shape, or form.

    This. All of this. Perfect.:flowerforyou:

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