Something to think about: gender and insecurity.

UsedToBeHusky

Hell I just think it's funny that so many out of shape people have the nerve to comment on someone who's worked their *kitten* off to look they way they want to look. Guess if you're gonna stay on the couch with the chips and hate your own body the only option is to try to tear down those who are doing the work.

It's sad and pathetic.

This is pretty much they way I think things truly are. I think statements like that are more derived from jealously than anything else.

cmriverside

Love this.

I again am faced with the fact I am masculine. I drive a Forester. I don't wear heels, or even dresses very often. I'm not married and I'm not looking for a man. I make all my own decisions. I'm good with that. I don't judge the girly-girls. I think they're beautiful. I just prefer to be in the woods than at the mall.

Elizabeth_C34

Hell I just think it's funny that so many out of shape people have the nerve to comment on someone who's worked their *kitten* off to look they way they want to look. Guess if you're gonna stay on the couch with the chips and hate your own body the only option is to try to tear down those who are doing the work.

It's sad and pathetic.

^ Agreed.

It's amusing that on MFP, fat-bashing is a huge huge no-no (remember the Adele is Fat thread?) but bashing fit women who worked their butts off (literally) to look great and be fit is not considered a problem. Crazytalk.

iqnas

bump

Lampy00512

Excellent post! :drinker:

jetscreaminagain

As an added bonus, I got exposed to this page from following a post on Fitocracy: http://2fit-2quit.tumblr.com/#top

Talk about motivating women that obviously are secure in their femininity!!

Oh my lord they're gorgeous! Thank you SOOOO much for sharing.

Lesley2901

Great post

becoming_a_new_me

I love this post!! I think that all people are beautiful in their own unique way...I found it disheartening that a woman who obviously is very careful with what she puts in her body and takes care of herself is denegrated for the way she looks. At 64 years old, an age when most people let themselves go, she grooms herself towards good health. Just because we as a culture associate a low BF% and muscle definition as "masculine" doesn't mean that it is solely limited to men. Woman can get there too...it just takes harder work with more determination. That is why I nominate her honorary MFP Queen for the day!

nermal6873

OP, you rock! :flowerforyou: :drinker:

skinnyinnotime

Although I have no desire to have that kind of body, I know and can see how much effort has gone into getting those kind of results. Just because it's not for me doesn't mean I find it necessary to be rude about what someone else wants and has achieved.

Well written post, I hope it makes people think before they start with their insults in future.

AlsDonkBoxSquat

I find that we so often agree. Right now I'm a little softer than I like to be, but I'm becoming resolved to lean out again and get my bf% back down as I continue to lift. I find it appealing, my husband finds it appealing, quite a few mean have mentioned appreciation of my figure when I'm lean actually, no one else matters and they can take their opinions and shove them up their *kitten* because I'm not picking apart their bodies. If someone wants to pick apart my ideal I can go nose to nose with them any day of the week, but I'd prefer to keep their negativity to themselves as I've respectfully kept mine to myself.

deborahmills22

Bravo! Very eloquently stated. Thank you.

Meggles63

Yet another great image of a strong, accomplished woman has resulted in a chorus of "eeww gross" and "she looks masculin" [sic] from the chorus of those-who-believe-the-world-has-a-need-to-know-who-they-are-attracted-to.

Sometimes we see this kind of response to an overweight/obese image. And rarely we see it in response to a drastically underweight image. But mostly, and especially in these forums, the "eww" gross 5th grade reactions are targeted at strong, accomplished women.

This is incredibly misogynist. Throughout the world, there are cultural differences in what is deemed attractive in women. Some cultures value women with a high amount of body fat. Some value women who are particularly skinny. What does not happen in patriarchal societies is a valuing of women who are strong. The more equal women are, the more their strength is appreciated and sought. So there's that. The "eww" response to stong women on MFP is a reflection of how far we really do need to go to value women as they are.

Here's what I really want to say: An "ewww she looks like a man" response says much much more about the speaker than about the target of that statement.

Expressions of gender vary among individuals. Men in America must expect people to question their masculinity AND their sexual orientation (which are two separate things) if they choose to become florists or hair dressers. Women are questioned about their femininity if they say "****" in some circles, or if they drive Subarus in some places. Or if they express an interest in tools and cars and weight lifting. This is because the expected expression of masculinity does not involve decoration and pretty things and the expected expression of femininity involves speaking "sweetly" and does not allow for self-determination and self-reliance.

But lets be serious, no one strictly follows the extremes of the expected gender expression for their gender. That's because we know that even if that guy is wearing a pink shirt, he's still a guy. His masculinity is secure enough something as small as a pink shirt doesn't negate it.

This is why male to female transgendered women are so vulnerable to some particularly sick violence from strangers. The existence of a person who had a penis but now looks like a woman becomes threatening to the acknowledged masculinity of the insecure *kitten* men that are violent against her. So they are violent to prove something.

So on these boards, when a beautiful, strong, muscular woman is denigrated as mannish by a man, you have an idea of what I think of that man and the several indicators of his manhood or lack there of (yes, including that). I feel pretty comfortable with the similar assumptions I make about women who criticize other women for being strong and accomplished.

That is all.

QFT! EVERYONE on MFP should read this! Thank you for posting!

Sabine_Stroehm

Hear hear!!
:drinker:

Riawna1993

this post is the best

megsmom2

OP....thank you! Beautifully said. The whole masculine/feminine spectrum dynamic is much more complicated than many people are comfortable with, so they cover discomfort with jokes or sometimes with anger...very misplaced. Everyone needs to feel free to be the person they see inside themselves, regardless of someone else's definitions. We are all worthy of respect.

malins2

Great post!!!

Buddhasmiracle

I love this post!! I think that all people are beautiful in their own unique way...I found it disheartening that a woman who obviously is very careful with what she puts in her body and takes care of herself is denegrated for the way she looks. At 64 years old, an age when most people let themselves go, she grooms herself towards good health. Just because we as a culture associate a low BF% and muscle definition as "masculine" doesn't mean that it is solely limited to men. Woman can get there too...it just takes harder work with more determination. That is why I nominate her honorary MFP Queen for the day!

"At 64 years old, an age when most people let themselves go. . . "

Oh . .. really? So let's move on from this too!!

robin52077

As an added bonus, I got exposed to this page from following a post on Fitocracy: http://2fit-2quit.tumblr.com/#top

Talk about motivating women that obviously are secure in their femininity!!

Oh my lord they're gorgeous! Thank you SOOOO much for sharing.

yes! thank you! Love this link AND of COURSE love the OP!
♥

allisonmrn

Great Post and well written!! Thank you OP!!