depression

cheesy_blasters

Erm, well. I don't really know how to take some of these replies so I'm just going to pretend they don't exist.

Some people get depression and some people don't.

I have depression too (bi-polar disorder) and I get exactly what you're saying. I don't take prescription meds because I hate them. I just think they're awful and destroyed my life. I know people who take them and sometimes they seem to work and sometimes they don't. I don't see them as a solution for everyone. I took them for awhile when I was younger and they made everything so much worse. Now I use a routine created by my Naturopathic Doctor. It has really helped.

I don't know if you ever explored that option but I would recommend it. I still have low days sometimes but I can go to school, work, go out, socialize, enjoy things. It's so different than how I was a few years ago (not being able to leave my apartment, having no energy, pushing all my friends away, skipping classes, not being able to work).

I know there's a way for you to get your life on track. It took me so long to do but there is a way.

I don't have any advice for you off hand. I know that even when you want to change things, depression can keep you from doing it. It's like being stuck in a deep hole and unless you have the right tools, you aren't going to be able to climb out. If you ever want someone to talk to, feel free to add me or message me or whatever.

I really hope you find the tools you need.

tanyaslosingit

Depression is a Catch-22 and many people don't seem to understand that to just "Be Happy" is not a real solution. That said, you are probably not going to like what I have to say next: You really need to see a professional, your suspicions regarding lack of confidentiality be damned. The cost of living with undiagnosed depression is too expensive versus having "everybody know." More people suffer from depression that you would suspect and it simply isn't the stigma that it was even ten years ago. If nothing else, you could find out what kind of depression you have (e.g. anemia-based vs a major chemical imbalance) and decide on your approach from there.

I really do understand and hope you take that first step: Be brave and move upwards and onwards :-)

KiwiKim25

Based on personal experience:

I had tried a few medicine therapies. My doctors were great and started me on low doses that very slowly increased so that I wasn't over medicated. Unfortunately, I had to stop in order to get another health issue under control.

Because of this:

I would suggest finding online help support (there are some out there specifically for depression) and trying a meditation class. I can not meditate on my own, but really enjoy the classes. Also acknowledging the balance between making yourself go out and be social/interact/get stuff done days and allowing "Me Days".

There is a lot of help online for this in many areas. Articles, forums, classes, books and more. I hope you find one (or more) that works for you!

foxyforce

Erm, well. I don't really know how to take some of these replies so I'm just going to pretend they don't exist.

Some people get depression and some people don't.

I have depression too (bi-polar disorder) and I get exactly what you're saying. I don't take prescription meds because I hate them. I just think they're awful and destroyed my life. I know people who take them and sometimes they seem to work and sometimes they don't. I don't see them as a solution for everyone. I took them for awhile when I was younger and they made everything so much worse. Now I use a routine created by my Naturopathic Doctor. It has really helped.

I don't know if you ever explored that option but I would recommend it. I still have low days sometimes but I can go to school, work, go out, socialize, enjoy things. It's so different than how I was a few years ago (not being able to leave my apartment, having no energy, pushing all my friends away, skipping classes, not being able to work).

I know there's a way for you to get your life on track. It took me so long to do but there is a way.

I don't have any advice for you off hand. I know that even when you want to change things, depression can keep you from doing it. It's like being stuck in a deep hole and unless you have the right tools, you aren't going to be able to climb out. If you ever want someone to talk to, feel free to add me or message me or whatever.

I really hope you find the tools you need.

this post made me happy. I too took meds when I was younger, but hated them as well. I actually felt it intensified some of my feelings. Later on I started taking Ativan, that was a couple years ago just because my self-esteem was so shot that I literally felt choked up during presentations in University.

I started taking lots of vitamins last week and have been pretty consistent with them. Naturopaths can be so expensive, maybe I can look for some plans online for free.

Thank you for the post.

foxyforce

One good start would be to change your depressing ID name

i've had this name for forever, in tribute to one of my fav songs: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6uJya5YgZps

Sezmo83

I have depression and a psychiatrist who believes medication is way over prescribed. His advice to me was basically (in nicer words) to get off my *kitten*, stop feeling sorry for myself and get out there and do things. Take a course to give my mind something to do, physically do something to give my body something to do. Make myself get out of bed and actually do things no matter how little I feel like doing them. He says it's a vicious circle, the less you do the more depressed you become, the more depressed you come the less you want to do.

I've taken his advice and while I wouldn't say life is all sunshine and light and happiness I'm feeling a hell of a lot better. Well enough in fact to stop pigging out on rubbish and get my eating back under control which is something I wasn't able to do before making myself get out of bed and do things.

I appreciate it may not be that simple for everyone and that some people may need medication or counselling or whatever to help but it's working for me.

foxyforce

why do so many people get off saying that people with depression "FEEL SORRY FOR THEMSELVES", i don't feel sorry for myself. that is a hoot and a half.

Bentley2718

I completely understand! And don't let people get on you for not taking medication. Statistically anti-depressants do not work. I am going to message you with some info.

Define "work." If drug companies could not provide evidence that their product produced a statistically significant decrease in symptoms of depression vs. a placebo, in a double-blind study, then they would not receive FDA approval. There are a lot of issues in the clinical approval process, including the fact that in the past, clinical trials did not have to be per-registered, meaning that companies would only report studies showing significant results (now studies are pre-registered so this should not be such an issue). Whether or not to take anti-depressants (or any other medicine for that matter) is a personal decision, that an individual should make in conjunction with information from a health care provider, but please don't go spouting off about what is "statistically" true if you do not understand statistics or the approval process for new medications. Thanks!

For the OP, I do understand what you are going through to some extent. I have a long history of depression that was not particularly responsive to conventional treatment strategies (e.g. medication, therapy). I find what makes the biggest difference in my ability to function is making sure I get enough sleep, eat well, and exercise regularly. It's hard to make yourself do these things starting off, but they can be of great benefit to at least some people--or at the very least, they keep me functional.

FiercelyBeautiful

I'm sure there are volunteer group sessions around?

Well to start off make yourself get up, and follow a good meal plan daily, also keep up the exercise it will make you feel better.

Really too bad you're too stubborn to get professional help, you're playing with fire. good luck

most professionals really don't know what they are doing anyway, i have worked with enough of the goofballs!

I take offense to this, I am a mental health professional and it is an extremely involved process, a ton of schooling, supervision, and more. The reality is we are not meant to "fix" people, we are trained to encourage and support them. Many people think it is our job to give them all of the answers but what good would that do? A person has to take responsibility for their choices, behaviors, and their feelings so that they can achieve lasting change. I struggle with depression myself even though I am a mental health professional; however, I have to continue to acknowledge where I am, identify triggers, and continue finding ways to combat those negative feelings. It isnt easy and it is a process.

To the poster, I understand your feelings and hope you can find the support you need because human beings werent engineered to do life alone. There is no shame in getting help, in fact even though I am a trained professional (working on licensure) one of the conditions of our training is to get our own mental health in check by regularly seeking therapy. The stigma attached to it is one reason we live in such a sick world, many people refuse help to uphold a certain image even though they really need it. We all do on some level.

gsurface28

A few things that might help (or not?) Volunteer or do something for someone else.. Bless someone with your time or actions. Its amazing how good we start to feel when we take our focus off ourself - problems & reach out to help others!
Also - You might really enjoy Joyce Myers book "Battlefield Of The Mind" - its life changing
Praying for ya!

serentity78

I am depressed too just alot in my life at this moment.....I do seek therapy and so far meds aren't needed but would consider them if it got worse. I am not a pill person either but sometimes they help even if temporary.

For me the best thing is to keep going trying new things.....I am just getting back on track with eating and exercise but that always helps alot...diet can play a big role in how many of us feel....then you think it would be easier for me to stay on track! LOL I hope you feel better and I can relate to being depressed....

foxyforce

A few things that might help (or not?) Volunteer or do something for someone else.. Bless someone with your time or actions. Its amazing how good we start to feel when we take our focus off ourself - problems & reach out to help others!
Also - You might really enjoy Joyce Myers book "Battlefield Of The Mind" - its life changing
Praying for ya!

i am volunteering, but it is only once a week. and i work on call at two shelters while i look for something fulltime.

maricash

No wonder you are depressed. Change your outlook.

If a depressed person could just "change their outlook" and be fine, then they wouldn't be depressed. Depression is an illness that robs you of energy and of the ability to just "change your outlook", "think positive" or whatever other tired cliche you'd like to use.

To the OP: I have suffered through several deep depressions. I used to be against taking medication as well, but I finally decided to give it a try and it did help a bit. It at least made me feel well enough to do some of the things that other people who responded have recommended (better diet, more exercise etc.).

You seem to fear that you will become some kind of medicated zombie. I don't think you will (I didn't, no one that I know who has taken medication for depression has), but keep in mind that, if that happens, or if you have other side effects, you can just stop taking it. You aren't obligated to take it forever just because you started.

If you had a physical illness would you not try medication for that? A mental illness is no different. I know it can seem like it's different (in part due to ignorance on the part of people who think depression is something you can just snap out of), but it really is no different. Something is wrong inside your brain. Medication might help you fix it.

Good luck and I wish you well on whatever course you decide to take.

shbretired

Only a fool thinks they're smarter than a doctor. Talk to your family doctor, he/she can prescribe something, give it a chance.

Don't let this get worse.

foxyforce

No wonder you are depressed. Change your outlook.

If a depressed person could just "change their outlook" and be fine, then they wouldn't be depressed. Depression is an illness that robs you of energy and of the ability to just "change your outlook", "think positive" or whatever other tired cliche you'd like to use.

To the OP: I have suffered through several deep depressions. I used to be against taking medication as well, but I finally decided to give it a try and it did help a bit. It at least made me feel well enough to do some of the things that other people who responded have recommended (better diet, more exercise etc.).

You seem to fear that you will become some kind of medicated zombie. I don't think you will (I didn't, no one that I know who has taken medication for depression has), but keep in mind that, if that happens, or if you have other side effects, you can just stop taking it. You aren't obligated to take it forever just because you started.

If you had a physical illness would you not try medication for that? A mental illness is no different. I know it can seem like it's different (in part due to ignorance on the part of people who think depression is something you can just snap out of), but it really is no different. Something is wrong inside your brain. Medication might help you fix it.

Good luck and I wish you well on whatever course you decide to take.

my brain is fine thanks

and the pharmacology for mental health is different than that of infection and other disease

foxyforce

Only a fool thinks they're smarter than a doctor. Talk to your family doctor, he/she can prescribe something, give it a chance.

Don't let this get worse.

i never said i was smarter than a doctor...so that is interesting.

Sezmo83

why do so many people get off saying that people with depression "FEEL SORRY FOR THEMSELVES", i don't feel sorry for myself. that is a hoot and a half.

I never said you were feeling sorry for yourself, I said my psychiatrists words basically amounted to me getting off my backside, making an effort to do things and stop feeling sorry for myself. And yeah, at times I DID feel sorry for myself and sit wallowing in self pity which made me feel even worse. I don't know anyone who can honestly say they don't have those moments though.

I still suffer with depression but at least I can function now.

xLexa

I did not believe in medication either until one very good doctor explained to me that it is a medical condition, an imbalance of "chemicals" for want of a better word in the brain. If someone had cancer, and a doctor recommended a certain course of action, I think the majority will do it. Depression is an illness and needs treatment, even if you don't want to go down the drug path look into natural remedies , but do something for it. I used to tell myself to stop being such a wuss and to give myself a good shake and get over it. heck some days I didn't even know what I was telling myself to get over! Talk with your doctor at least, or a doctor that someone you trust recommends to you, anyone really, that is a good place to start. And well done on taking this step, because admitting it out loud to others is the first step to getting where you need to be. Best wishes.

swisspea

I have never suffered from depression, but this seems like excellent advice!

I have depression and a psychiatrist who believes medication is way over prescribed. His advice to me was basically (in nicer words) to get off my *kitten*, stop feeling sorry for myself and get out there and do things. Take a course to give my mind something to do, physically do something to give my body something to do. Make myself get out of bed and actually do things no matter how little I feel like doing them. He says it's a vicious circle, the less you do the more depressed you become, the more depressed you come the less you want to do.

I've taken his advice and while I wouldn't say life is all sunshine and light and happiness I'm feeling a hell of a lot better. Well enough in fact to stop pigging out on rubbish and get my eating back under control which is something I wasn't able to do before making myself get out of bed and do things.

I appreciate it may not be that simple for everyone and that some people may need medication or counselling or whatever to help but it's working for me.

maricash

my brain is fine thanks

and the pharmacology for mental health is different than that of infection and other disease

You said in your original post that you suffer from severe depression. Your brain is, by definition, not fine. That's not an insult, that's a fact.

The sooner you can accept that you have an illness, the sooner your can recover from it.

Of course drugs for infection are different from drugs for mental health, I'd be more concerned if they weren't. That doesn't change the fact that drugs can be an effective treatment for depression. And you won't know if they can be an effective treatment for your illness unless you give them a try.

I'm not sure why you are getting so defensive with people who are sincerely trying to offer you help and advice.

kittyfrost

Going to ignore some comments on here and just put in my two cents...

I'm in the same place as you right now. I've been struggling with severe depression for a while, and have tried many therapists that for some reason just did not work for me. I also tried medication, but honestly it made my mood so much worse. I also have no friends at college, I usually spend time by myself or with my family, I try communicating all the time with other students but there's no interest,and a lot of them have their established friend groups already. It really is difficult feeling stuck and not knowing what to do.

I've turned to exercise & yoga, although it's not enough it does make you feel brighter for a short period. I'd just suggest immersing yourself in a personal project and keep fighting through the bad days. Sorry I don't have a lot of advice, but I really wish you luck.

foxyforce

my brain is fine thanks

and the pharmacology for mental health is different than that of infection and other disease

You said in your original post that you suffer from severe depression. Your brain is, by definition, not fine. That's not an insult, that's a fact.

The sooner you can accept that you have an illness, the sooner your can recover from it.

Of course drugs for infection are different from drugs for mental health, I'd be more concerned if they weren't. That doesn't change the fact that drugs can be an effective treatment for depression. And you won't know if they can be an effective treatment for your illness unless you give them a try.

I'm not sure why you are getting so defensive with people who are sincerely trying to offer you help and advice.

because many of you are seriously misinformed and callous

foxyforce

i just got called into work for tonight and i already feel WAY better.

this is the kind of issue i am having.

mill1295

I read a study that some doctors did where they had people with depression exercise everyday for an hour and gave another group prescription anti-depression drugs. There was the same amount of relief in each group and the exercise effects were longer lasting when they stopped working out vs. the group that stopped taking drugs (who relapsed almost right away).

Another thing that doesn't get enough press is that not eating enough fat can make depression worse. I no longer buy low fat products and use butter and EVOO in my cooking. I used get SAD over the winter and after making that one change it didn't happen last winter. Fat is a nutrient that your brain needs so you should try eating more fat. This is still possible in a low calorie diet, you just have to eat less other things. Or, you can also offset the calories with the exercise!

I wish you luck!

Ndunn001

People don't know how it feels to be someone with depression unless they struggle with it. I was given anti depressants at my parents insistence from age 9-22. I grew up not knowing who I was and feeling disconnected with my body. While on antidepressants I tried to kill myself three times. I found that once I became labelled as someone who was "medicated for depression" I thought that was the only thing that identified me. If I forgot to take my medication in the morning I would get painful withdrawal symptoms. Finally I was able to get off medications at age 22. Since then, I am the happiest I've ever been in my life. Granted there are times when I am depressed and I certainly have many issues but at least I can feel them and know they are a result of my self and not some medication.

I do however, advocate counseling. Being able to talk to someone is crucial. The loneliness of depression can be the most crippling aspect. Also, journaling saves me every day.

I typically try to stay away from message boards because people who comment often annoy me. However, when I saw how some people were responding to you, I felt obligated. Don't listen to the haters!!

azwildcatfan94

I used to be a case manager for "persons diagnosed with a serious mental illness." I also live in a small city and am diagnosed with depression. And trust me, I totally get what you are saying about not wanting to get therapy in your community as well as not wanting to take meds. There isn't an agency in my city where I don't know some of the staff. And, I know how people in the field talk.

Also, in reading your original post, I see common symptoms of depression in things you say that other people have slammed you for saying. If I was in a bout of depression right now, I would probably have written almost word for word what you wrote.

I take both anti-depressants and mood stabilizers. I have my periods where I'd love to get off meds, but every time I try, I crash big time. So, I frequently wish I had never started them.

When I have my periods of depression, things look so hopeless and I don't know a way out. And even going out and doing something that I would find enjoyable isn't enjoyable. But, over the years, I've discovered a few "coping strategies." One is to get out into direct sunlight. I don't know why it works for me, but it does. Second, is to keep doing those things that are enjoyable even if it doesn't feel good at that time. Those are the biggest two things for pulling me back out of the abyss.

Are you familiar with the WRAP plan? I know that in some cases it can be totally overdone, but for me, it has also been a good tool for identifying what seems to help. I know part of it is to be figuring it out while you are already in a healthy place, so you can stay there. But, depression runs in cycles and (as long as you don't kill yourself) eventually you will come out of it. So, if you can try to notice what brings you up this time, you can use it next time. And, I do totally believe in the concept that first and foremost, I am responsible for my own mental health. Therapists, doctors, support groups, friends, whatever are just tools to accomplish it. I get to choose which tools I use.

Obviously, how you get out of it, and stay out of it, will be unique to you. But, there are some good tips here. Exercising and proper eating are keys for keeping me out of a depression. The hardest part is starting. If you currently aren't exercising, maybe try walking. If it is too hot where you live, walk around a mall or do laps in one of the big box stores. If you like to swim, or some other activity, do that.

You said you don't believe in god. That's fine. I sort of waffle around atheist, agnostic, and deist (in the lightest sense of the term). But, another thing I've found that helps is meditation. I don't do it in any kind of religious sense. But, if you can find some books that focus on meditation for just the basic how to aspects, that might help you as well.

If you want to pm me and talk, feel free. I'm not a therapist and I won't pretend to be. I'll do my best to be compassionate and I'll tell you what I think. I've been DTS in the past, so that sort of stuff won't shock me.

rextcat

find a hobby, excersize, just get off the fing couch and out of the house ,you will feel better if you do, you may not feel much better but since you refuse to seek help any little bit counts:bigsmile:

foxyforce

I read a study that some doctors did where they had people with depression exercise everyday for an hour and gave another group prescription anti-depression drugs. There was the same amount of relief in each group and the exercise effects were longer lasting when they stopped working out vs. the group that stopped taking drugs (who relapsed almost right away).

Another thing that doesn't get enough press is that not eating enough fat can make depression worse. I no longer buy low fat products and use butter and EVOO in my cooking. I used get SAD over the winter and after making that one change it didn't happen last winter. Fat is a nutrient that your brain needs so you should try eating more fat. This is still possible in a low calorie diet, you just have to eat less other things. Or, you can also offset the calories with the exercise!

I wish you luck!

i just came off of a vegetarian diet, so i wonder if this had an effect. thank you

20diane

HI try Kundalini Yoga especially by Maya Fiennes. Fantastic for the mind and also good exercise for the body. I feel on top of the world when I have completed the dvd, I use one for stress good luck

Elizabeth_M

There's no shame in medication, especially if you've tried other avenues. And, until you've spoken to a professional, you haven't tried them all So, you know a lot of people in the mental health field because you work there. EVERYone (even obviously those who work in that field) may need someone to talk to from time to time. If you went with a Doctor you kind of know (not saying on a personal basis) then I am sure they would be professional enough to treat you just as they would any other client, no?

I hope you find some peace.