Exes..

tashaa1992

What would you do if you received a love letter from an ex?

I've written one to my ex, broke up in august, and stopped speaking two months ago, and I want to post it. I know we broke up ages ago, but my feelings for him haven't changed even though we haven't seen each other since, so friends have said I may aswell just tell him how I feel because if I don't there will always be that 'what if.' It feels so lame that I've actually written it, like no one ever does that do they? I'm just nervous about sending it.

sktllmdrhmz

I never click on .exes.

sktllmdrhmz

How long were you together and why'd you break up?

PaperThinLips

i would prob end up writing a love letter to my ex..
but i was always told to move on cuz someone better is waiting for you!

Cliffslosinit

Send me the letter. I'll read it...but i am NOT getting back with YOU!!!

EmCarroll1990

Honestly? Let it be. An ex is an ex for a reason.

korsicash

I have done this, he searched me out. I thought things would be just as memory served...turns out my memory had him as a shinning prince and honestly he was a drunken hobo. I am better off having moved forward.

lil_pulp

Writing the letter is fine. Sending it is another story, and I guess it depends on your motivation. If I got a love letter from an ex, I would feel really uncomfortable.

(I was in a relationship once where my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend sent ME an email saying how she was still in love with him and would I please break up with him so that she could have him back, but I should not tell him about the email. That was weird, too, and it didn't work.)

odusgolp

What would be your point?

1. To make him vomit b/c it's a love letter
2. To make it known you're still pining over him even though you know it's not reciprocated
3. To inflate his ego
4. To make him come crawling back nearly a year later


Think logically here....

LivetoRun07

Sometimes after a while of being apart the reasons the break up happened are forgotten. An ex is an ex for a reason. Who's to say the reasons you broke up won't surface again if you got back together. Not to mention, the second time around isn't always great. Best to hold on to the good memories, keep them in your heart, and move on.

That is my advice. But you do what your heart tells you. I don't know the situation and, obviously, have no idea how you feel. Hope everything works out!

odusgolp

I have done this, he searched me out. I thought things would be just as memory served...turns out my memory had him as a shinning prince and honestly he was a drunken hobo. I am better off having moved forward.

Isn't retrospect a wonderful thing

SpydrMnky27

I wouldn't want a love letter from my ex.

It's hard to say without more info but I'd just let it go.

UsedToBeHusky

I've written love letters to my exes, but always thought twice about sending them. It usually helps the healing process just to get those feelings out. But the reality of it is, he has already moved on. I don't know what your break up was like or how long you were together, but odds are that sending him that letter might not lead to anything good. You really need to think about what his reaction will be to this before you set yourself up for some hurt.

Expialidojess

It's one thing to write the letter for yourself as a way to get your feelings out, but I would not send it.

Let go.

skullshank

i would greatly enjoy the feeling of knowing that she finally realized how kick *kitten* i am, and i would take great pleasure knowing that it probably took a LOT to suck it up and write me.
i wouldnt be mean about it at all, but would make it clear that the feelings are not mutual, and that i am all set and 110% happy.

then i would high-5 myself and rub one out thinking about how awesome i am.

lil_pulp

Just send him a brief note saying something like, "Hey, I was just wondering what you're up to these days. Hope you're doing well!" That way, you'll make it known you're open to re-connecting if he wants and the ball will be in his court. If he doesn't respond, let it go.

Pedal_Pusher

You got nothing to lose................

tashaa1992

How long were you together and why'd you break up?

It was coming up to two years before I broke up with him and we broke up because I wasn't trying to recover(I'm in recovery from anorexia)and we didn't fight over me not eating everynight, it was more he'd get angry, make me feel guilty, I'd cry and it was just too much. His brother and wife really didn't like me and kept telling him I was cheating, I didn't. He was telling other girls he wanted to sleep with them, but I finally broke up with him because he wasn't there at all when we lost our baby, like that was the final straw.

Around christmas time, he told me he still loved me and still wanted there to be an us, but since deleting his number two months ago, he hasn't tried to make any contact. I've tried to move on, I went on my first date since our break up last weekend but the whole time I was thinking about mark. Ugh I really don't know what to do

taxidermist15

i I got a letter from my ex, I found find the return address, hunt him down and punch him in the face

sktllmdrhmz

He wasn't there for you then, he's not going to have magically manned-up in the meantime. "On to the next one..."

odusgolp

Then, you're not ready to date... but if he hasn't contacted you it is over. As hard as that is to accept. Break-ups are usually harder for one person than the other. In this case, you're still pining.

Work on your self esteem, your recovery, and the things you enjoy. Take up classes or something to occupy your time. But for the love of gravy, do not send him a love letter.

Cindym82

He wasn't there for you then, he's not going to have magically manned-up in the meantime. "On to the next one..."

THIS!!!

iLoveMyPitbull1225

leave it be honey. trust me

UsedToBeHusky

How long were you together and why'd you break up?

It was coming up to two years before I broke up with him and we broke up because I wasn't trying to recover(I'm in recovery from anorexia)and we didn't fight over me not eating everynight, it was more he'd get angry, make me feel guilty, I'd cry and it was just too much. His brother and wife really didn't like me and kept telling him I was cheating, I didn't. He was telling other girls he wanted to sleep with them, but I finally broke up with him because he wasn't there at all when we lost our baby, like that was the final straw.

Around christmas time, he told me he still loved me and still wanted there to be an us, but since deleting his number two months ago, he hasn't tried to make any contact. I've tried to move on, I went on my first date since our break up last weekend but the whole time I was thinking about mark. Ugh I really don't know what to do

You're really young, and you are going through some tough stuff. Now might not be the best time for you to be in a relationship. I'm sure the feelings that you have for him are real. Even if the baby was miscarried, a bond is formed between two people who make a child together. He is having a hard time dealing with his own feelings about you and the baby. He probably blames you for losing the baby since you weren't taking care of your body. For now, you really need to focus on you and getting yourself right. I can't say for sure if he is lost to you forever or not, but you know that you aren't in the right place to be with ANYONE right NOW. When you are responsible enough for yourself that you are no longer co-dependent in relationships, then you can begin again. If he is still around and has managed to forgive you, then maybe he will be that one, but even if he isn't, when you are ready, the right one will be there for you. Stay strong! Remember that you can't take care of others if you can't take care of yourself. :flowerforyou:

DaBossLady24

How long were you together and why'd you break up?

It was coming up to two years before I broke up with him and we broke up because I wasn't trying to recover(I'm in recovery from anorexia)and we didn't fight over me not eating everynight, it was more he'd get angry, make me feel guilty, I'd cry and it was just too much. His brother and wife really didn't like me and kept telling him I was cheating, I didn't. He was telling other girls he wanted to sleep with them, but I finally broke up with him because he wasn't there at all when we lost our baby, like that was the final straw.

Around christmas time, he told me he still loved me and still wanted there to be an us, but since deleting his number two months ago, he hasn't tried to make any contact. I've tried to move on, I went on my first date since our break up last weekend but the whole time I was thinking about mark. Ugh I really don't know what to do

Write the letter. Know that the feelings are still there on your part and not his. Rip the letter to shreds and burn it. Then go out with your friends and have a few drinks... it'll still hurt, BUT at least you get some good out of it :drinker:

htmlgirl

I've done something similar. It wasn't a full-out love letter, more like a "I miss you and still have feelings for you. Is there a chance we could get back together"... now we're married. My reasons for ending it the first time had to do with my shortcomings not his and we had about a year and a half of not really talking all that much in between.

I say if you do, keep it short, don't be mushy about it, just say you still have feelings. Just be prepared for him to say no or ignore it. The worse that can happen is he doesn't want to get back together... just be prepared for that

jzrharv

Will there be any kind of explosive device or weaponized bioagent attached?

sportsforfun

Don't do it.

sculley

Speaking from experience, ex's aren't always ex's for a reason. Sometimes it's the right person but the wrong time. I am now married to the person I wrote a letter too many years after our breakup. So I am testimony that it isn't always a no-go.

tomomatic

Sounds like you had good reasons to make him an Ex.

I'm not gonna lie: I used to have What-If thoughts about my ex-gf when things with my gf were going bad. The grass is always greener elsewhere.

You have "graduation goggles" right now where you remember all the good things and have problems remembering the crappy things. It's kinda like remembering the kid across the street as "playful" when in reality he gave you noogies and swirlies and teased you mercilessly. Don't make decisions in this state of mind.

Find a reason to get angry and stay angry. It sounds like you have plenty of good reasons. It can be petty. Just hold onto that feeling and think about that whenever you think of him.

camelgirlmn

I believe that exes are exes for a reason, however you cant help who you love or who you dont love. If he hasnt tried to contact you in so long maybe the feelings are not mutual. If you are going to send him a letter a tip of advice- dont be mushy just let him know that you still have feelings.