How Do You Know When It's Time To Stop?

DebbieMc3

Please understand that I say this with kindness and concern. In this and other posts, you shown signs of compulsivity that indicate and Eating Disorder. I would strongly suggest you seek some help.

This^

shyrina25

u think i look thin? i dont know, let me see ur recent pic. as for food diary i closed mine months ago lol people were just rude!

MinMin97

If you haven't already, start lifting heavy.. and you'll get out of that either only skinny or only fat phase.

I knew I was done just by how I looked in the mirror.. and the fact that I was fitting into a size 4 clothes.. which I haven't worn since high school!

^^^^This! Weight training by lifting heavy gives you that beautiful toned skin and tissues and body...satisfyingly trim, fit, healthy look that does not need a scale to affirm it...lift heavy and fuel your body for the weight training efforts to get an awesome look!:)MinMin

sarahrbraun

Thanks for all the words of encouragement and support. I kind of know what I need to do but I just can't make myself do it.
I've already logged what I plan to eat tonight but I'm taking my son out for lunch soon so I'll try to pinch a bit of whatever he's having.
I don't think I look thin because I have been a LOT smaller than I am now so I know I'm not that bad but I also know how I do look does not look particularly healthy.
My profile photo is me 16lb heavier than I am now and I wear girls age 10/11 jeans, so the rational part of my brain knows it's time to stop but on the other hand if I can just get down to another milestone then I'll stop. Make sense??

you need HELP. You are falling down down a slippery slope into an eating disorder. You are too darn skinny, you are constantly tired, and your diary is locked--probably to hide the tiny amount of food you eat.

even the way you talk tells me that you are in a dangerous place--you say "I'm taking my son out for lunch" instead of "my son and I are going out to lunch". IMO, it sounds like you are planning to eat a bite or so of his, and not even bother ordering food for yourself.

darrensurrey

:
Upload a very recent photo of you and we can let you know. Also open your diary.

I'll get a new photo on later but there's no way I'll have my diary open to the public again. The last time I did that I got totally battered from all sides! :frown:

Do you eat unhealthily? Or just under the Magical 1200 calories?

darrensurrey

[ramble alert]

Regarding the suggestions of an ED, it's possible. From personal experience, I can see that it's quite easy to become anorexic (in one's approach to food). I was starting to hate food as I started to think that eating is doing the opposite of what I wanted to achieve... like accelerating with a foot on the brake. I also hate bodily functions that waste time... like cooking/eating, personal hygiene (washing, shaving), toilet usage - you don't achieve anything and they are not enjoyable activities... obviously, I do them for self-respect issues but I still view such activities as tedious. Point is, I could see how I could slide into an ED. (As you can see from my food diary, though, I do eat an average of 1900 calories a day.)

janemem

Please understand that I say this with kindness and concern. In this and other posts, you shown signs of compulsivity that indicate and Eating Disorder. I would strongly suggest you seek some help.

:flowerforyou:

janemem

Thanks for all the words of encouragement and support. I kind of know what I need to do but I just can't make myself do it.
I've already logged what I plan to eat tonight but I'm taking my son out for lunch soon so I'll try to pinch a bit of whatever he's having.
I don't think I look thin because I have been a LOT smaller than I am now so I know I'm not that bad but I also know how I do look does not look particularly healthy.
My profile photo is me 16lb heavier than I am now and I wear girls age 10/11 jeans, so the rational part of my brain knows it's time to stop but on the other hand if I can just get down to another milestone then I'll stop. Make sense??

you need HELP. You are falling down down a slippery slope into an eating disorder. You are too darn skinny, you are constantly tired, and your diary is locked--probably to hide the tiny amount of food you eat.

even the way you talk tells me that you are in a dangerous place--you say "I'm taking my son out for lunch" instead of "my son and I are going out to lunch". IMO, it sounds like you are planning to eat a bite or so of his, and not even bother ordering food for yourself.

I very rarely eat during the day so yes, it would have been a case of ordering something for my son and me pinching a bite just to taste. We didn't find anywhere in the end so my son just had something when we came home.
I save my food for at night (usually in bed) when I know I won't be tempted to eat anything else afterwards so I don't go over my calorie limit.

kathyc609

i dont know how to do it. i keep pushing my goal lower also -- or just keep saying in my head i will stop after i lose another 20. i will still be in a good bmi range but my friends and family dont seem to think so.

janemem

:
Upload a very recent photo of you and we can let you know. Also open your diary.

I'll get a new photo on later but there's no way I'll have my diary open to the public again. The last time I did that I got totally battered from all sides! :frown:

Do you eat unhealthily? Or just under the Magical 1200 calories?

I eat very low fat/sugar/carb/protein which I KNOW is wrong but as I only eat once a day I like to get as much food s I can for the calories I've 'spent'.
1200 is the goal MFP have set me but I am always under, I normally net around 7 or 800.
I go over my limit most Sunday's though when I have a meal with my son. We'll eat whatever he wants, within reason. It's always something home cooked and I always log absolutely everything but I really don't worry if I go 1000 cal's over as I know I'll drop it during the week anyway.

janemem

i dont know how to do it. i keep pushing my goal lower also -- or just keep saying in my head i will stop after i lose another 20. i will still be in a good bmi range but my friends and family dont seem to think so.

That's exactly what I'm like, even though I'm getting pressure from friends/family I always want to just get down that last extra little bit.

janemem

[ramble alert]

Regarding the suggestions of an ED, it's possible. From personal experience, I can see that it's quite easy to become anorexic (in one's approach to food). I was starting to hate food as I started to think that eating is doing the opposite of what I wanted to achieve... like accelerating with a foot on the brake. I also hate bodily functions that waste time... like cooking/eating, personal hygiene (washing, shaving), toilet usage - you don't achieve anything and they are not enjoyable activities... obviously, I do them for self-respect issues but I still view such activities as tedious. Point is, I could see how I could slide into an ED. (As you can see from my food diary, though, I do eat an average of 1900 calories a day.)

Darren I'm the opposite as regards to my feelings about food. I love it, am obsessed with the stuff! I spend most of my days planning meals for my son and I also cook to sell to friends (preserves/cookies/cakes etc). I literally enjoy nothing more than thinking about food and I will readily admit that I am a 'feeder' which is great, just so long as it's other people eating the damn stuff, lol!
As regards to your other points about tedious activities (aside from cooking) I agree, I have to force myself to make myself presentable sometimes because A) it's too much effort and what's the point anyway?
I have not looked at your diary but I will now if that's ok with you?

janemem

If you haven't already, start lifting heavy.. and you'll get out of that either only skinny or only fat phase.

I knew I was done just by how I looked in the mirror.. and the fact that I was fitting into a size 4 clothes.. which I haven't worn since high school!

^^^^This! Weight training by lifting heavy gives you that beautiful toned skin and tissues and body...satisfyingly trim, fit, healthy look that does not need a scale to affirm it...lift heavy and fuel your body for the weight training efforts to get an awesome look!:)MinMin

Catch22. I don't have the energy for weight lifting, to get the energy I'd need to eat loads and I don't want to do that and risk gaining weight.

taso42

Aim for a body fat percentage rather than a weight.

Once your body composition is roughly where you want it, make goals that are performance based, i.e., weight lifting benchmarks, running benchmarks, etc.

jhoyett

Definitely sounds more psychological and borderline dangerous. You may want to talk to a therapist...

devil_in_a_blue_dress

Maybe lock the scale away for a week or two and stop eating at a deficit that amount of time as well.

If you cannot fathom doing something like that for fear of gaining weight, I have to go with the others who suggest seeing a therapist - just to make sure your perception of yourself is healthy.

darrensurrey

Darren I'm the opposite as regards to my feelings about food. I love it, am obsessed with the stuff! I spend most of my days planning meals for my son and I also cook to sell to friends (preserves/cookies/cakes etc). I literally enjoy nothing more than thinking about food and I will readily admit that I am a 'feeder' which is great, just so long as it's other people eating the damn stuff, lol!
As regards to your other points about tedious activities (aside from cooking) I agree, I have to force myself to make myself presentable sometimes because A) it's too much effort and what's the point anyway?
I have not looked at your diary but I will now if that's ok with you?

Of course it is ok otherwise I'd have locked it. :-D Since you're into cooking, I expect you're horrified by my diet.

sa11yjane

I wonder if you are focusing on your weight loss as a way of avoiding ackowledging the feelings that you may have of missing your husband? Find a reputable site to see how much you should weigh and if you fall within the weight given then maybe go onto a maintenance plan and find some other outlet for your feelings, maybe a hobby or meeting some friends to keep your spirits up and to prevent you from becoming bored or lonely x

jetscreaminagain

The thinking and behaviors you are describing are dangerous and unhealthy. It is most likely far beyond time to stop. The people who love you are expressing concern. Your thoughts and behavior about food sound obsessive. You are not modeling healthy behavior for you son.

Please get help. Please don't fill your friends list with pro-ana folks you can find around here.

Now is the time to stop.

susannamarie

You're lacking energy, you're not eating much, you're paranoid of dietary fat and hyper-concerned about gaining weight even though you're at the bottom end of the BMI range and in children's sizes.

You really need to talk to your GP about this

The longer you put it off, the harder it will be.

MsEmmy

I already replied but wanted to add this.....what messages are you sending to your son if he never sees you eat? How one earth is he going to have a normal relationship with food if you don't set an example? See a professional for your son's sake if not for yourself. The only way you are heading now is to the hospital if you carry on like this. Sorry to sound harsh but it is done only in kindness.

Hiding in your bed to eat food? Too tired to exercise or do normal activities? Eating half of the minimum calories you should in a day? Admitting you look terrible? Why are you punishing yourself, my love? People have offered some good advice - you can stay slim AND be healthy, but that is not what you are doing right now. You need some strength to be a good Mum to your boy. What you have right now is a control issue, a safety net you have created to save yourself from looking at bigger problems. You really, REALLy need to talk to a professional.:flowerforyou:

kazza2cats

I can relate. I've sent you a private message and friend request. :flowerforyou:

Sorry after seeing your diary I realize I can't relate.

kazza2cats

I hope you find the help you need.

dorothytd

I can relate. I've sent you a private message and friend request. :flowerforyou:

Sorry after seeing your diary I realize I can't relate.

I have to say the same. Not a criticism of what is on there, but you need to eat much more than you are. It would be good to see a doctor or nutritionist. Best wishes on your journey.