i'm depressed :( :'( n don't know what to do..

sandredee937

My tip is to eat small meals throughout the day (every 3 hrs or so), never eat a huge meal and try to avoid resturants and fast food as often as possiable. i used to throw up after i ate sometimes also ( AND IM NOT BULIMIC EITHER) it was just that i couldnt control my self and ate so much that i felt sick and had to yuk... anyway.. dont get discurged if one day you mess up start again the next.. follow the MFP guide for calories IT WORKS!!! and if you follow it you dont even have to exercise much (even though u shoud... lol, i dont) stay positive and remember your, your worst enemy, learn to love yourself no matter what!!!

teamnevergoingback

You're definitely in the right place! We all know how you feel and have similar goals. As long as you stick to it and put in the effort you will be able to succeed. There are a lot of helpful people here.

caraiselite

sounds like you a therapist to work on your mind first, then work on dieting and exercising.

if you don't fix your self esteem, you could weight 100 pounds and still not think you're thin enough.

dicker94

I have gone from 276lbs to 236lbs since January by logging my food on MFP, walking everyday at least a couple of miles and doing Tabata 3 times per week (look it up, 4 mins a day burns calories for 24 hrs after)

Please don't give up, there are some great success stories on here and i am becoming one of them. One of the biggest motivations for me is girls are starting to look at me again, i even got a comment the other day saying i was hot-from a complete stranger to her friend. Can't tell you how much of a boost that is. You'll get there but the best bit of advice i could possibly offer you now is to log in EVERY day! Because recording everything you eat and the exercise you've done makes yu become strict.

Good luck to you girl, you will become fitter, slimmer, sexier, more confident, happier and have the boys chasing ya. xx

EpiGaiaRepens

crap. i missed the whole bulemic thing.

ED's are an entirely different story. If you have an ED you probably don't have to lose 60 lbs and you need therapy more than you need a diet.

Still, only log food you actually keep down. And don't you dare eat less than 1200 cals a day. I lost 50 lbs eating at least 1200 cals a day, and eating my exercise cals on top of that. The closer you get to goal, the MORE you have to eat (sounds crazy, I know).

ps. I have had an ED and I'm telling you that eating right is better than puking/starving. My BF% is lower and I am hella stronger and I look WAY better than I did when I was anorexic. Food is good for you....if you make good food choices. And the occassional slobber fest of chocolate and carbs and sweets and pizza is actually a normal part of the "journey"....I've had a LOT of pizza and baked goods on my path to lose all this weight. I just balanced it out with a lot of salads and regular exercise.

MizSaz

I'm saying this with love, seriously, because I have stood exactly where you are standing, and I know how overwhelming it is, and I know it sucks, so with that in mind:

Congrats. You just threw yourself your very last pity party. Felt good to get that out, right? I know it did. So now that it's all out there, for you and everyone else to see, get it together. Being sick of being fat isn't going to change a damn thing. You have to take proactive steps to improve your life.

That negativity? Let it go. It will torment you and hold you back if you don't. So what you have to lose 60 pounds? Honestly, it's nowhere near as much as it would be if you gained another 60. Food is fuel. Food is not a reward. Food is something you need to live and function as a human being. You can't hate it. You do need to learn a healthy respect for it.

If you try to go from your normal eating routine into a 5 day water fast, you will regret it. There are healthy ways to fast, and I've gotten to know a few people who do it from time to time for not only physical, but spiritual and mental reasons as well. What you're talking about doing isn't fasting, it's setting yourself up for failure and more self loathing. Don't do that to yourself.

Spend a few days logging the things you normally eat. At the end of the few days, really look at what you're putting into yourself. Think about what changes you can make that are sustainable and realistic for you. There are millions of people on this site, and they will all give you different opinions about what works and what doesn't. The problem with that, though well intentioned, everyone is different. What works for one person may not work for another. You need to work on YOU and find out what works for YOU.

I honestly, sincerely, wish you the best, and I hope I didn't offend you. You can do this. Be strong!

xLexa

My advice would be this, take a look at the tickers under many of the people who posted here. We ALL have to start somewhere. You have 60 to lose I started with 160to lose!. Heaviest I have ever been in my life. In teens and early 20s i suffered from eating disorders also. Now I am obese... yup I said it out loud. I truly believe it is all part of the same eating disorder spectrum. You are 20 and you are lucky to have found MFP because in 20 years you could have been me! Do it the right way dear and you will succeed, and every lb you take off, remember you are on a journey that will set you up for life, if you take it off too quickly chances are you will put it right back on again. You CAN do this!

rjl64

Be proud that A) you've started this program and you are voicing your feelings. If your feelings seems too overwhelming, I would HIGHLY suggest seeing a therapist who is experienced with weight loss/overeating/eating disorders. Keep your feelings flowing and try to move past them. Let them enlighten you and inspire you to go forward.

Something else I would suggest is: For a week, stop comparing yourself to other girls/women. Stop buying fashion magazines. When you see a thin person, distract yourself and think about how smart/funny/talented you are. Try really hard to focus on this being a HEALTH journey, not a beauty journey. Really try to feel your health improving from the inside, rather than how your clothes are fitting on the outside.

These are difficult suggestions, but they help me a lot!

60_to_lose

EpiGaiaRepens : no no.. i don't have an ED (and no i'm not in denial).. i seriously need to lose 60 pounds, i'm FAT!

BR3ANDA

First: You might want to get into some therapy for the way you feel about yourself, if you go to church maybe you could talk to a mentor there. Second: "Diets" dont work, you have to make a lifestyle change, and thats not going to happen overnight and its not going to happen until you come to the root of your problem and learn to live and love yourself. Also, you cant expect to lose the 60 lbs in a few weeks, its going to take time so you need to learn patience. Make small changes you can stick with and you'll be successful. Today is going to be a good day! ~ Say that to yourself and mean it, and it will be a good day.

rlmadrid

I know exactly how you feel. I am always "happy" for everyone else and it's exhausting. I hate the way I look, I can't wear anything, and I just end up sitting around moping - or eating

Please, please stop throwing up! I believe you when you say you aren't bulimic, over-eating and being upset can make me nauseous to. I have IBS, anything and everything makes me ill.

If it makes you feel any better, I have 40 to lose and I'm only 5 lbs in. They tell me it gets better, so I'm trying. Feel free to add me on here if you want to talk. I know how hard it is dealing with depression alone and not being able to tell anyone how you are feeling.

tracyjoys

I will say this...it doesn't matter how much you weigh to love yourself. Clearly you love yourself enough to give MFP a try and reach out for suggestions and advice - give yourself a lot of credit for that! :flowerforyou:

The suggestions and advice you've gotten here already are a fantastic place to start! Truly, truly, it's about taking things one day at a time. Have some confidence that you CAN do this, and you'll have more gentle and beautiful thoughts about yourself. That's what attracts people to you, not your size.

I've been "skinny" and "one of those girls" and I've been heavy throughout my life too (a life long battle, really) and trust me, your body size doesn't = being happy. "Those girls" can feel just as crummy on the inside no matter how "awesome" the outward appearance.

Yes, seek counseling if you're depressed/purging. That's not reasonable, healthy or sustainable. Making choices each day that fuel your body & spirit ARE sustainable. Take it hour by hour if you must, and be kind to yourself along the way! Nobody expects you to be perfect, this is a learning journey that will last a lifetime. Just do the best you can each day, and remember that your best each day will fluctuate. If you "do it right" 80% of the time, you have PLENTY of room to throw in some splurges along the way, too!

Best of luck to you!!

TunnocksTeacake

Now listen here missy...... stop putting yourself down. Talk to me , what are you struggling with , was calories are you on a day, what do you want to lose every week. And no you dont need to excercise just yet :flowerforyou: It will come in time and you will start to see a difference. Take each day at a time but dont live on water, you're body will think its being starved and hang on to the fat. I try to decide what im going to have for dinner at night and if i find ive gone a bit over i opt for a low calorie pre packed meal. Morrisons do a lovely chicken dinner and its only 279 calories. Ditch normal bread, thats was my downfall, and go for crispbread, or Kingsmill 50/50 crustless its only 47 calories a slice. Its all about making the right choice of food. Good luck.

kneasles

Honey, most of have felt the desperation you're now feeling. Take baby steps. Start logging your food and start moving. Before I started about 6 weeks ago I could only think of the 50 pounds I needed to lose. It seemed overwhelming at the time. Hearing other people's stories on MFP gave me strength to know I could do it - little by little. I post my weight loss ticker because it gives me encouragement and in a weird way accountability - although I think I didn't post it until I lost 2 or 3 pounds.

Please don't eat & purge. You can damage your heart that way.

EpiGaiaRepens

EpiGaiaRepens : no no.. i don't have an ED (and no i'm not in denial).. i seriously need to lose 60 pounds, i'm FAT!

Wait. Didn't you say you make yourself puke after eating??? This is disordered behavior hon.

You said you throw up "often" after eating.

You say you are fat, but I am not sure you are. ED's are the result of a wildly distorted self image. Please see a doctor and let them tell you your BMI before you go calling yourself fat.

StrawberrySuzyQ

have faith in the mfp program. give it time. be proud of yourself for taking the steps to become healthier. don't expect results over night, this is about changing your lifestyle to becoming a healthier you. it is hard at first, but it gets easier as you adjust. find a way to contain your anxieties- go for a long walk, talk a hot bath, relax. and if you cannot then look for help from a counsellor. you can do this. deep breaths.

THIS^^

The program WILL work! It does take time and discipline. I thought I ate good but when I started to track my foods I realized what I was eating and started making better choices. I thought I was fit and strong, but when I tracked real exercise as opposed to what I just did at work (restaurant server) and started a workout program, I realized I wasn't what I thought I was.

Changes are the hardest things to make---and while you want to make changes to your body, you need to FIRST change how you THINK! If you are THINKING you are fat and ugly, then you will BELIEVE it. If you THINK "I can't do this" then you won't be able to do it. Start by changing your thinking process: There is a thin person in me screaming to get out and I'm going to let her! I can do this, even though at times it will be hard and I may have set backs. ONE set back or bad day does NOT mean you are a failure.

Please feel free to add me if you'd like a little support, or just someone to talk with. I can't promise to fix anything, but I can promise to listen and share what has worked for me and my own struggles. That is what MFP is all about! Hang in there! YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

smartgirl1540

Hi, I know how you feel. I used to weigh 400 pounds. I have been dieting and working out for four years. I now weigh 278. There are days when I get discouraged and feel like giving up. But then I wake up and realize that the reality is that I did not put the weight on overnight, and it will not disappear overnight. I am committed to making this journey. My goal weight is 160 pounds. I will make it and nothing will stop me. You can't let yourself get short-sighted on the big goal of 60 pounds that you have to lose. Break it up and celebrate small goals. Treat yourself when you do good. Every lifestyle change you make will have a positive impact on your health and your body. There are times when I get upset when I think I haven't exercised enough, or when I eat something I shouldn't. There are so many people in your life who want to see you the way you want to see you. You need to decide to use your saddness as your motivation. When you exercise, the brain releases chemicals that will make you happier. It could just be a walk outside daily. Just don't give up. We are all here to support you.

Carollsanchez

There is a lot of pressure from society about our image.please take steps in the process of loosing weight.behind our image the most important is who we are in the inside, don't let the weight makes you sad.Is it with p thatatience and encouragement from each other that we will make it.please be happy.oEne step at a time.

rlmadrid

Hi, I know how you feel. I used to weigh 400 pounds. I have been dieting and working out for four years. I now weigh 278. There are days when I get discouraged and feel like giving up. But then I wake up and realize that the reality is that I did not put the weight on overnight, and it will not disappear overnight. I am committed to making this journey. My goal weight is 160 pounds. I will make it and nothing will stop me. You can't let yourself get short-sighted on the big goal of 60 pounds that you have to lose. Break it up and celebrate small goals. Treat yourself when you do good. Every lifestyle change you make will have a positive impact on your health and your body. There are times when I get upset when I think I haven't exercised enough, or when I eat something I shouldn't. There are so many people in your life who want to see you the way you want to see you. You need to decide to use your saddness as your motivation. When you exercise, the brain releases chemicals that will make you happier. It could just be a walk outside daily. Just don't give up. We are all here to support you.

Congratulations! You've accomplished a lot and you are a great example of how hard work and healthy choices pay off. 60_to_lose, read this for motivation. Some of us have only come 5-10 pounds, but you can see real, lasting success. MFP does work to teach you to understand cals in and cals out and help you find healthy, filling foods.