Mom and Dad are NOT HEALTHY!

NomNomCupcakes

I'm 24 and still live with my parents who in their late 50s. . . early 60s. My dad is older than mom and works a labor heavy job. Since he's on his feet all day and working so hard he has knee problems. My mom on the other hand is a cashier at a grocery store. Both my mom and dad are overweight. They buy and eat a lot of junkfood (ice cream, chips, etc) processed food (tv dinners). They buy soda like it's going out of style. I'm worried about their health because I'm so super health conscious and want to see them healthy and happy (and living a very long time)! Does anyone have any advice on how to help my parents be healthy????

EDIT: Not trying to FORCE THEM to be healthy by the way . . . I mentioned advice to HELP. . . thank you advance lol

Saiklor

Being healthy, like getting an education or working at a nonprofit, is a choice and I think it's one you really can't make for other people.

Maybe try being concerned about their happiness instead. Are they content? Safe? Happy?

NomNomCupcakes

Wow thanks for the advice. . . lol

Louise1247

my mum and stepdad are the same. They lost a bit on Slimming World but gaind it alll back for the same reason. They cant stick to anythink and they dont seem bothered about my concern

missashley884

u cant make anyone want to be healthy. maybe try cooking for them? go for family walks?

NomNomCupcakes

my mum and stepdad are the same. They lost a bit on Slimming World but gaind it alll back for the same reason. They cant stick to anythink and they dont seem bothered about my concern

Same here it just makes me sad

Louise1247

Being healthy, like getting an education or working at a nonprofit, is a choice and I think it's one you really can't make for other people.

Maybe try being concerned about their happiness instead. Are they content? Safe? Happy?

In my case they are happy while stuffin their face then complain they are fat or get ill easy... my SD is suffering bad blood pressure, cholesterol, etc and doesnt help it. My mum is very unhappy with her appearance but doent really push to change thhat!

HauteP1nk

All you can really do is Lead by example.

You can't force them to change unfortunately. Don't continually try to motivate them with talks about what they SHOULD be doing and WHY...they already know. All you can do is try to change your own lifestyle and then maybe they will see the benefits through you and make small changes themselves...

Bobby_Clerici

Most people are just not interested - especially at their stage of life. It's natural for people like us who saw the light to become eager to lead other beggars to the bread we discovered.
Give it a try, but be ready to lay off once they reject your attempts to throw them a much needed life line.
All we can be are watchmen on the wall.
We shout, we warn, but the towns people will either mobilize or not.
And if not, we look after ourselves.
Good Luck:flowerforyou:

summer8it

Are they supportive of your weight loss/getting fit journey? Telling them what to do won't help (do you know how many times I've told my OWN mother she needs to eat more than 800 calories a day?), so the best thing you can do is to feed them nutritious food. Offer to do some of the shopping, and volunteer to cook dinner a few nights a week if you can. That way you'll know that they're sometimes eating something more nutritious than a TV dinner!

Beezil

All you can really do is Lead by example.

You can't force them to change unfortunately. Don't continually try to motivate them with talks about what they SHOULD be doing and WHY...they already know. All you can do is try to change your own lifestyle and then maybe they will see the benefits through you and make small changes themselves...

This.

Louise1247

u cant make anyone want to be healthy. maybe try cooking for them? go for family walks?

You can- its whether they see the reasoning for it! is it excuses stopping them or is it because they really dont want to? (rhetorical)

Most people who are unhappy (my example) want to be healthy but find easy excuses not to change that x


sorry cant spell!

willia123

i have no idea how busy your life is, of course, but could you ask them if they would mind if you cooked dinner a few nights a week? Maybe just to get the conversation/dialogue going?

basillowe66

My dad died when he was 59, my mom when she was 70. Neither was overweight, but both smoked their whole life. I am 76 and really healthy. When i was in my mid 40's in a stressfull jo and applied for life insurance, I was not even rated because of my lifestyle.

NomNomCupcakes

I never said that I was FORCING THEM to get healthy everyone who keeps responding in that way . . . I was just concerned, and wanted advice. Not trying to force anything on anyone lol

deadstarsunburn

After mentioning it in a positive way with no attempts you'll just have to lead by example.
That really makes a huge difference for people to actually see it happen.

Renae_Nae

Cook!! If you can cook and make at least some of what they eat healthy then it's better than nothing. Otherwise, there isn't a lot you can do. My fiance's uncle is HORRIBLE. He eats so much junk food (polished off half a gallon of ice cream last night - I was ticked because I bought it and didn't get any!) And we've learned that there is nothing we can do to stop him. It's just a choice he has to make.

SammieGetsFit

I agree with most of what others have said, but I do know from experience that little things can help. Just by you doing things in the house can help them. Odds are if you volunteer to cook, they're not going to throw a fit about what you make for them. Don't tell them you're feeding them the "healthy" option, don't make it a "hard sell" just cook some good food. They'll love, and you'll know that for at least that meal they're doing better. You can also buy some snacks that are healthier and offer them to Mom and Dad when you snack -- I hit on a vegan ice cream that I adore and when I wanted some I offered one to my mom. She didn't know it was vegan, she didn't care. She just liked it.

Lead by example. You may not change them completely, but every little bit helps.

Best of luck! :flowerforyou:

janehen12

im in a similar boat.
i ended up sending my dad an email saying i couldnt find the words to say this face to face, but i love you, and want you around for a long time so please try and get healthy.

that was the general jist, it was more heartfelt.

he emailed back saying it had made him cry knowing i care so much, hes sorry for everything (we had some rough patches) and that he'd make an effort for me.

we can't do anything but try x

supplemama

Ask them to think about their future. It could be that they consider YOU to be their insurance plan i.e be the one to take care of them when they are old and sick. maybe ask them what they think their health and their lives will look like in 20 years if they continue on in this way? in 10?

What has been the example for elderly years in their families? For example, did they have their own parents become sick and dependent?

It could also be that, like many people, they don't understand the connection between what they eat and their health.

Emancipated_Tai

I agree with a poster above, you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink. Basically, you can introduce the ideal of getting healthy, but it is their own decision as to whether the commit to the process. Think about all the people in the world who are overweight. I’m pretty sure almost all of them would love to be slimmer/healthier, but people get set in their ways. Your parents are quite up there in age so if they have a routine they are accustomed to it is not likely to change at this point.

One thing I have learned is to not force your ideals on others. I’ve tried to encourage many friends to get fit and they always seem like they are up for the challenge, but never take that first step. However, they constantly ask me how I’m losing weight, go figure!