SO WHAT if I am bragging!!!!
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Ahh the old MIL problem!
My MIL loves to cook. Really big, banquet style meals. She has quite old fashioned food tastes (well she is 71 yrs old) and she lives to feed everyone these huge meals of really fattening foods. She only eats a sparrow's portion herself though. She'll sit at the table and take maybe one small potato, and a few bites of meat.
Then, whatever you don't manage to eat (which is a lot as she cooks for double the amount of people) she actualy MAKES you take home. I'm not exagerating no-one in our family can say no to taking it home, because she gets all upset about it being a waste, and she won't be able to eat it!
Unsurprisingly, she's really slim and glamorous, and wears amazing designer outfits that fit like a glove. Also unsurprisingly, many members of the family are overweight or struggling not to be overweight, especially my teenage nieces.
It's not as simple as saying no, or saying you want to lose weight. There really is a lot of guilt involved, because it's her thing that she does for her family her 'raison d'etre'. I'm actually going there tonight for a meal, which is why I've just had to make sure to do an hour on the bike, and will do something similar tomorrow morning, to try to please everyone, and not go over my calories!!
Ah well I really do love her, even if it slows the weight loss down a bit - but people from that generation don't understand about weight loss they grew up in world war II, there were food rations(in the UK) and obesity was very rare!0 -
If you're talking about people in your real life getting tired of you droning on about your weight loss, then you need to stop talking about it. You're being rude.0
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If you're talking about people in your real life getting tired of you droning on about your weight loss, then you need to stop talking about it. You're being rude.
Absolutely NOT... In my opinion we all have the right to praise ourselves up. This is a section for motivation and support... if you don't have anything to add that is MOTIVATING and SUPPORTIVE...WHY would you post here? :huh:0 -
I talk about my weight loss and workout routine to keep myself motivated as well. I even tried to get some friends to workout with me. I have goals set and seriously want to achieve them.
There are some in my life who try to sabotage me also. Unfortunately my mother is my worst critic. I have big arms for a woman(family trait) so I lift weights,I figure if they are gonna be big anyway they might as well be tone & defined. Every time someone mentions my weight loss around my mother she always has to comment on how big my arms are and that I need to quit lifting(never anything nice about how far I have come)
I have lost a total of 44 pounds, and went from a size 14(tight) to a size 10(comfortable) and ALOT of inches!! (okay I'm done bragging) LOL
Brag away people, you should all be very proud of yourselves!!!0 -
Brag on girl, brag on!! I normally only "publicly" (ie FB posts or talk a lot about it) talk about my weight loss journey if I really need pick me ups. It gets on my SIL's nerves...and some of the people I work with. I have learned who I can talk to about it and who I can't. I try to keep my journey mostly to myself b/c I am doing it for ME, not to see how many friends I have to support me. The support is nice in those difficult times!0
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If you're talking about people in your real life getting tired of you droning on about your weight loss, then you need to stop talking about it. You're being rude.
Absolutely NOT... In my opinion we all have the right to praise ourselves up. This is a section for motivation and support... if you don't have anything to add that is MOTIVATING and SUPPORTIVE...WHY would you post here? :huh:
THANKS AMBER!
BTW, NOT that I need to explain myself, but I dont BRAG and TALK constantly about it. BUt, I do mention it and get excited when I drop more weight and tell those that I THINK should care about my health! I dont DRON-on about it and make it the topic of EVERY conversation!0 -
I have learned to pick and choose who I talk to about weightloss. I can bore people stupid because I am slightly obssessed. It would be like someone trying to talk to me about football. I would be bored and probably would not be able to hide it for long and have to change the subject.
I do talk to my husband about my journey... a lot... he tries to listen attentively but even his eyes glaze over when it comes to macro nutrients LOL
Mostly I talk to my best friend and my MFP friends they understand and are supportive.0 -
Not to be rude.. but......I learned that once I got settled into my new 'lifestyle', it was all I talked about, mostly because I was so excited and proud of myself for finally taking control. I also realized how easy it was and I wanted to drop tips to other people about how I did it, how they could do it, etc. Try to remember how you felt before you started your journey, when people talked about their diets and how you could lose weight. It's a big turn off. Sit down and listen to yourself and think about how you feel about others who obsess about something and wont shut up about it. It's annoying! I do however feel your pain about 'wanting' to talk about it. Luckily my husband joined me on mfp and that helped 100%. Also, that's what your MFP pals are for. We are all here to listen and proudly cheer on success! Congrats on your efforts and continue to be proud of yourself, regardless of other's comments!
When people tell me I'm too thin (even though I'm only 2lbs into the 'healthy' weight category, I just say that no one is used to seeing me in a healthy weigh range, I WAS obese and that I will always be working on being healthy because it's a lifestyle, not a diet!
Sometimes I do think that they are jealous and sometimes I wanted to smack the people who kept bringing me unhealthy food. Eventually, they caught on and realized that I just don't eat that 'stuff' anymore. I've gotten to the point that if I go to a family dinner (usually potluck), I'll bring my own food and add some of theirs, if it's healthy. I also DO NOT CARE what they think. Eating well and exercising is how I lost my weight and got healthier. This is for me, this is for you!
Keep up the good work.0 -
It's great that you're having wonderful success with your weight loss, but most people have a short attention span when it comes to things like this. It's no different than someone who talks about their kids constantly, or their fabulous job, or their amazing husband. People can only take so much of it and then they want to talk about something else.
People will notice that you are losing weight without you telling them. If there are people you know that don't see you very often, something as simple as posting a new picture of your trim self on Facebook will make the point. Then you can brag to all the people that show an interest. If they are annoyed, they aren't interested.0 -
If you're talking about people in your real life getting tired of you droning on about your weight loss, then you need to stop talking about it. You're being rude.
Absolutely NOT... In my opinion we all have the right to praise ourselves up. This is a section for motivation and support... if you don't have anything to add that is MOTIVATING and SUPPORTIVE...WHY would you post here? :huh:
Truth is, there are plenty of people that don't want or need to hear about it. I am so happy for everyone's weight loss on here, and I love to hear about their progress. I love the fact that I can share it here as well. Truth is though, not many people who aren't doing the same thing want to hear about it. I don't know all their reasons, but when they aren't doing this, breaking that plateau, or picking up a heavier weight, or dropping that last pound to your next mini-goal isn't so exciting. If they don't want to hear about it, they really shouldn't have to listen about it. Post that stuff here where people are genuinely excited about it an understand.0 -
I get it. And I'm going to keep on bragging - so you should too.
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I generally don't care what people think about me. If they don't like my lifestyle, it's their problem, not mine. It's harder when it's family though. Just keep improving yourself for you and let the MIL be jealous. :laugh:0
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If you're talking about people in your real life getting tired of you droning on about your weight loss, then you need to stop talking about it. You're being rude.
Absolutely NOT... In my opinion we all have the right to praise ourselves up. This is a section for motivation and support... if you don't have anything to add that is MOTIVATING and SUPPORTIVE...WHY would you post here? :huh:
Truth is, there are plenty of people that don't want or need to hear about it. I am so happy for everyone's weight loss on here, and I love to hear about their progress. I love the fact that I can share it here as well. Truth is though, not many people who aren't doing the same thing want to hear about it. I don't know all their reasons, but when they aren't doing this, breaking that plateau, or picking up a heavier weight, or dropping that last pound to your next mini-goal isn't so exciting. If they don't want to hear about it, they really shouldn't have to listen about it. Post that stuff here where people are genuinely excited about it an understand.
I agree, I am a more private person, so even though I am also trying to do this, I don't like talking to people about it. Some people don't realize that and it makes it annoying to talk to them when they constantly want praise from me. If I don't seem thrilled about anything, then please drop it. I have a few people who I am comfortable talking about my eating and exercising with, and I mainly just talk to them.
I'd say find a few friends who are comfortable talking about it with you and stick to them. If your Mother in Law is uncomfortable with it, don't force it on her.
Congratulations on all that you have done though.0 -
Sorry to those of you with a-hole mother in laws....but thank you for reminding me that I hit the JACKPOT with mine....who wouldn't dare say a negative word to me. She's always complimenting my weight loss, and tells me all the time how "happy" and "lucky" she is that I married her son. I think I'll bring her some flowers when I see her next time!Most MIL are going to pick at you no matter what. If you weren't trying to lose the weight then she might be giving you a hard time for being overweight. Just ignore her and keep at it.0 -
I have two rules when it comes to talking about yourself.
1. If it has nothing to add to the conversation, then you're bragging.
2. If you're throwing numbers/qualifiers in there to compare/compete against someone else, you're bragging.
2a. If the other person is wanting to compete, then GAME ON.
That being said, it's perfectly okay to brag if you're proud of yourself for your accomplishments. If I win a few medals or a new sword at the highland games or get a bumper crop of tomatoes, then I want to share that with people. But I won't try to wedge it into unrelated conversations. Same with my weight loss - some people are actively interested (like MFP), and some people aren't. So, I may bait the hook once, like saying "I've got a competition" when someone asks what I'm doing this weekend, or if someone comments on me looking thinner, mention what I'm doing. Then if they ask more, then I say more.
That being said - my MIL is about halfway in between - she likes the fact I'm losing weight, but also says that since I've got "a lot more muscle", I shouldn't worry too much about being big. She's supportive without being preachy and uninformed.
She's not a flower person - all I need to do is to "bring her grandbaby" and she's happy! :laugh:0 -
I'm sure losing weight is exciting for you and you're proud of yourself... but no one else cares. Not nearly as much as you do anyway. I'm sure they're proud and happy for you but you need to learn when to shut up about it. NOBODY likes that real life person who goes on and on about their diet.
Maybe you should focus that here. People here care more than average real life Joe because they're on the same journey. This is the place for all that, nit the dinner table.0 -
I have had so many people tell me that i don't need to lose any more weight. most of them weigh between 20 -40 pounds LESS than me. what's up with that? I look different than my 250 pound self, and it freaks them out i think. but i am not done, i am still overweight. i am not aiming for a size 2, but you would think that i was borderline anorexic the way people are reacting.0
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Keep working YOUR program! I totally get that it’s hard when people don’t understand your motivation or that you SOMETIMES need to be motivated! Just keep a smile on your face and say “thanks...but I’m full”.
I get a lot of...You sure don’t eat much...what a waste. OH well...I pay for what I eat or more often don’t eat...so get over it!
Keep up the great work!0 -
you deserve to brag!!!! If people don't like it they can just go away! lol. Everyone works hard for their weight loss and people should understand you want to show it off! If want someone to support you and that you can brag to , add me, I make a good friend! Congratulations on your weight loss!!!!!!0
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F' Em and keep on keepin on. I have been told I am obsessed with it. I think part of it is if I am not thinking or saying something about working out or eating better, i will slip back to the old ways. NOT GONNA HAPPEN!.
Proud of you and Brag all you like!0 -
Yeah I feel you. It takes a LOT of willpower for me to be making better decisions, I have always really struggled with the motivation to TRY. (Really, I think that's the hardest part of losing weight if you ask me.) This past weekend a friend looked at me and said, "Have you been losing weight??" to which I replied, "well I hope so." And she replied, "why?? You look great why do you need to do that??" and gave me this whole speech about how I look great and she wishes she could look like I do. As much as that was flattering - really? I'm overweight based on any medical standard you look at. And as I told her, I gained 15 pounds after I got married two years ago, and it isn't fair to my husband or myself.
I don't get why people try to DISCOURAGE weight loss when clearly its a good idea... and all of this coming from a girl who works out like two hours a day and is doing the Fat Flush Plan. I would think she would understand!0 -
OK, so, I guess BRAGGING is the wrong word. A lot of this that I am talking about is when it is in conversation, that THEY usually bring up...or when I try to say, "NO THANK YOU" to foods and they look at me like I am from another world or something. If they ask, I tell them...I mainly talk about it to people who I know care but, there are those few who ask and then when i tell them, they kinda get all bent out of shape. OR, people ask me to do something (small...like talking on the phone, nothing major) and I say I cant because I NEED to get my walk in or something. Just things like that is what I am talking about.
Yes, i know what it is like for others to make progress and you WISHING you could just DO IT!! WELL, I am done WISHING and I am DOING IT!! If you dont like my posts on FB, dont reply or read...If you dont want to hear my opinion about what I do and what works for me, DONT ASK.
I dont push the issue with people, nor do I make it a big deal in my life.0 -
I'm just the opposite, I don't like talking about it and yet people keep bringing up the topic. I change it as quickly as I can, but I feel as if this journey of mine is private. Don't you wish people could just keep their comments to themselves??
Keep up the good work. You look great!!!
I'm more like you, though it's kind a mix. I've got a very few key friends that I'll talk to about this because I know for sure they aren't going to judge or critic, or are doing something similar. But for the most part I don't tell people all that much. I've been overweight nearly my whole life, and part of that is emotional/psychological, and I need to keep my mindset in a certain way (doing something good for myself, getting stronger) and have to resist a lot of mental habits to keep it there.
I absolutely hate "food police" and whenever someone starts trying to tell me what to eat (unless I've specifically asked them or paid them to) it just makes me want to do the opposite. If you tell someone you are trying to get fitter /healthier /lose weight, everyone has some advice, and most of it seems to involve following someones specific miracle short term diet plan, ugh, or some exercise plan that would be way more than I can do right now. I'm trying to make a life style change gradually, my own way, and so far it's working.
Lucky I know so many people with special dietary needs (and some that are just picky) that no one pushes too much if I don't want to eat something.0 -
F' Em and keep on keepin on. I have been told I am obsessed with it. I think part of it is if I am not thinking or saying something about working out or eating better, i will slip back to the old ways. NOT GONNA HAPPEN!.
Proud of you and Brag all you like!
I think this is my big thing. If I dont keep it front and foremost in my brain, I take too many steps back and have to push forward harder again. I need to make it a big part of my life for awhile so i can get to where I want and to where I feel comfortable. My Heaviest was when I was preggers and I reFUSE to be that big at my next pregnancy if I can help it! HEALTHY is what I want to be so I WILL BE!!0 -
You start off the thread saying very clearly that you are always talking and bragging about your weight loss and people get tired of hearing about it. Then you completely change the story and say that you don't make a big deal out of it and you aren't bragging. How is anyone supposed to respond to that? If you can't say what you mean then there's no point in posting a thread.0
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Yeah I feel you. It takes a LOT of willpower for me to be making better decisions, I have always really struggled with the motivation to TRY. (Really, I think that's the hardest part of losing weight if you ask me.) This past weekend a friend looked at me and said, "Have you been losing weight??" to which I replied, "well I hope so." And she replied, "why?? You look great why do you need to do that??" and gave me this whole speech about how I look great and she wishes she could look like I do. As much as that was flattering - really? I'm overweight based on any medical standard you look at. And as I told her, I gained 15 pounds after I got married two years ago, and it isn't fair to my husband or myself.
I don't get why people try to DISCOURAGE weight loss when clearly its a good idea... and all of this coming from a girl who works out like two hours a day and is doing the Fat Flush Plan. I would think she would understand!
It comes down to people not knowing what it is like to live in OUR skin. We know what we feel comfortable at and, as long as it isnt unhealthy then let us do it and encourage us. I have sugar issues so everyone knows I WILL NOT force myself into an eating disorder and that this healthy living should HELP that.0 -
Why would I post here? Because she needs a reality check. I'm not going to blindly say "ooh you're so awesome and everyone in your life is wrong!"
Absolutely NOT... In my opinion we all have the right to praise ourselves up. This is a section for motivation and support... if you don't have anything to add that is MOTIVATING and SUPPORTIVE...WHY would you post here? :huh:If you're talking about people in your real life getting tired of you droning on about your weight loss, then you need to stop talking about it. You're being rude.0 -
Mommakit79... You are sooo awesome, and everyone in your life is WRONG so I'm super glad that you have MFP to get the MOTIVATION and SUPPORT you need to keep on keeping on! You deserve to be chuffed, you deserve to say "No MIL I'm working on a better me I don't want your desserts, but thanks anyway!" You deserve to be proud and happy about your success! We all do!! :flowerforyou:0
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(clapping) Amen sista!!0
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You start off the thread saying very clearly that you are always talking and bragging about your weight loss and people get tired of hearing about it. Then you completely change the story and say that you don't make a big deal out of it and you aren't bragging. How is anyone supposed to respond to that? If you can't say what you mean then there's no point in posting a thread.
I never said I am ALWAYS talking and bragging about it but, I make it a point to let people know what I am doing.
Ya know, my mother always taught me, "If you cant say anything nice, dont say it at all!" You dont even know me and you are all up in my grill about something that was said and taking out of context (on my part as well...maybe I shouldnt have used the word BRAG).
I AM DONE NOW....saying a prayer and moving forward!!0
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