Do you bring your babies to the restaurant?
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its got nothing to do with the baby, its the parent
if the baby cries, you remove him
i have always gotten compliments on my childrens behavior in restaunts
and they have been in restraunts alot more expensive than $25.00 a person
its called teaching them manners
This is my view as well. I have taken my kids to fine dining restaurants every since they were babies. My ex-husband was an executive chef, so we always went to upscale places. I would walk outside or into a restroom for crying of bad behavior.
By doing this, and expecting good behavior, my boys know how to handle silverware correctly and cut a steak (which most adults can't do). They don't put their elbows on the table. They chew with their mouths closed. They are polite to waitstaff, and always say please and thank you. They don't do gross things at the table. They know how to use "restaurant voice".
The down side is that they now have expensive tastes, and crave things like smoked cheeses, kobe beef, and sushi...0 -
"However if I'm paying $25 a plate minimum and it's a nice, upscale restaurant, I think it's totally inappropriate to bring young children. No kids menu? Then that place probably isn't for children."
This is the principle we apply when we go out....usually family friendly places but occasionally we will treat ourselves to a bit of an upscale dinner. No kids menu, they don't go....mostly because we can't really afford to feed all of us at $25+ per plate but still...0 -
I have fought on both ends of this. I don't have kids but I've been to places with crying babies.... A grocery store or department store I understand because a mom has to do what she needs to do, she shouldn't be held prisoner in her own home just because she has a baby. But if it were in a nice restaurant where the parent(s) could have made baby sitter plans or something, I think the baby should stay home. When people go to a restaurant the price that they pay for their food not only goes toward the food cost, but it goes toward the atmosphere as well. If they allow children to be running around and babies to be crying (Like a Denny's on a weekend morning) then I'm not going to pay. I would have to speak with a manager or leave. I honestly wouldn't ask them to shut their kid up, as tempting as that is.... They are free to be there, just as I am. So, it's a tough situation.0
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I think it's cute that you think you won't take your baby to place like that one day.
Everyone makes "rules" for their future babies.
And then they have a baby.
This. I used to be the OP. Now I have a kid. I think the point here is that I (like most others) would not leave my child screaming and just ignore it. But crazy us - we tend to meet his basic needs.0 -
My youngest is 22 months old and we have enough trouble getting him to sit at the table through an entire dinner. That said, we have brought him to family style restaurants, but not somewhere that might be considered "fancy" noooooo thank you. :laugh:0
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Last I checked this is America and you can bring your children anywhere but an R rated movie. I might have thought the same way as you before i had kids, but until you have them and know the situation as to why their children are with them, you shouldn't judge. Perhaps there is NO family to care for them and the friggin parent needs a night out. Albeit, I've always kept my kids as quiet as possible when out, stepped outside if I had to and had the most respect I could for others, but we all gotta eat, and kids are a part of us.
Pretty sure, I have seen children at R rated movies... I have seen a 9 year old at a showing of the Dictator not too long ago....0 -
OK I'm going to try to sayt his nicely and by no means did we take our son to fancy rest. but.....
Our son had a medical issue that caused him to become feeding tube dependant for a little over 2 years. He never learned to "eat" like a normal child. We did intensive therapy with early intervention and 2 children's hospitals in order to "teach" him to eat again.
ON top of that, he is non medicated ADHD.
Eating out is hard.
When he was little we tried to go out to eat right after a feeding session at home when either he ate enough orall or I tubed the rest into his feeding tube. Then we had to wait about an hour and head out to eat.
I couldn't just drop him off at a baby sitter.....this was a medically complex kid (healthy now thank GOD) on multiple medications that all had to be timed apart.
At one point one of our early intervention goals was to start doing feeding therapy in public because well, people EAT in public. WE all do.
You would not believe the stares we got. To others, it looked like I had the most spoiled kid on the planet. He would kick, sometimes scream, I started out only feeding him a "snack" at the mall in the food court.
Fast foward to now, he's 5.5 (still unmedicated ADHD) but still does not understand all the "social" skills that come with eating out. He still only eats because it's on a schedule. Very rarely does he eat because he is hungry or likes very much the food put in front of him.
If you saw us out to eat, yes I am still feeding him with his fork or mine or whatever I can get my hands on in order for him to eat. That's just how it is. He will be on his knees, under the table, asking about everything around us. His mind runs 100 MPH 24 horus a day.
It's not because he is a brat, it's because he got dealt a ****ty hand in life and we are still paying the consequences to this day.
We are just glad and amazed he eats by mouth at all. The original goal was to have his tube out by the time he entered K5, well, he enters K5 in the fall and got his tube removed before starting K3. He beat his goal by 2 years people, that is amazing.
I also know a HUGE amount of tube fed children on line. He is the ONLY child I know of how has gone from 100% tube fed to completely oral all at home and did not have to be admitted into an intense rehibilitation feeding program at a children's hospital.
So, please be compassionate when you see a family struggling while they are out to eat. I cannot tell you how many times I would go home and just cry. We got horrible looks all the time.
of course sympathy is called for in your case. but Id have to ask anyway- why not make life easier on all of you and use restaurants that are more appropriate for the behavior? If not for him but yourself. Instead of eating somewhere nice or even borderline nice (chain restaurants) why not mc donalds, chuck e cheese or chick fil A etc.
When my kids were out of control (terrible 2s- boys, basically untrained animals til about 2. 5 or 3 yrs old) Id stay home. Simple. In time they grew into humans and we go where ever we want. They act like gentleman at the table and Im not stressed or crying when I get home.
As I said - you have a certain situation that is unlike most of us. Why not take an easy road once in a while- if not for some peace to others- but for your own sanity.0 -
Depends on the formality of the restaurant.
I used to bring them to more relaxed places and still do as babies/toddlers, but if their behavior became unacceptable (crying/throwing/whining/running around), I would send my wife out to pack them up in the car, then I'd pay the bill and leave. One warning, and then it's over. They learn fast if they can't get away with it.
A more formal, quiet place where there's no kids menu? I don't even bother when they're young and messy. Maybe now since they're older, but I'd bounce them out just the same if they couldn't hold to a proper level of etiquette.0 -
Sorry, but I can't tell you when my baby is going to be fussy and upset. And yes, I will take him out of the room if he starts crying. I'll even hurry my family along and take my food home if things are going that badly. But don't be an a**hole and lump everyone with a crying baby into the same "omg they are so loud and annoying and not taking care of it and I should've have to deal with it and they should just be going to eat crap food at Denny's if they want to go out". Because that's just rude. I am allowed to try to enjoy my life with my family. I had a very unpredictable baby and he could be perfectly content one second, then be screaming bloody murder the next. And even if I DID take him out to calm him down, I still got dirty looks. My daughter was completely different. I've been taking her to symphonies since she was not quite three. She sits still and if she starts getting a little loud, you tell her and she immediately takes it down a notch. And frankly, a kid's menu is NOT what I look for when I eat. I want QUALITY food, and my kids can share off of me. I don't eat out much, but when I do, I don't want fried crap and wilted lettuce.0
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Last I checked this is America and you can bring your children anywhere but an R rated movie. I might have thought the same way as you before i had kids, but until you have them and know the situation as to why their children are with them, you shouldn't judge. Perhaps there is NO family to care for them and the friggin parent needs a night out. Albeit, I've always kept my kids as quiet as possible when out, stepped outside if I had to and had the most respect I could for others, but we all gotta eat, and kids are a part of us.
Pretty sure, I have seen children at R rated movies... I have seen a 9 year old at a showing of the Dictator not too long ago....
How do you know he was 9? lol0 -
The restaurants we go to don't serve babies...anymore...0
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i wouldn't bring my kids to a nice place like OP said, but something casual like applebees, sure.0
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You just referred to someones child as "it"... :huh:
I call my kids "it" matter of fact thats my 9 year olds nickname!
Along with Sponge, Ickybobcrane!
I call mine The Kid, Thing 2 and Painy. Ppl have called me out- move along nothing to see here. "it" is good- when said with love- all these names are cute. Not cute- allowing lil angel babe to cry while Im trying to eat. Then I call it crotch fruit. Rotten crotch fruit at that.0 -
I don't have kids, I don't like kids, especially kids that cry, scream or run around under your feet.
That's why, when I go for a meal, it's at an upscale restaurant. I expect there not to be kids there screaming, running around etc.
Now I do not mind if they are well behaved kids that you don't even notice & this has happened most of the time that I have seen kids at more upscale restaurants (very rarely). Don't even notice they're there sort of thing but I would definitely complain if I did have a screaming child on the next table if it wasn't a family orientated place.0 -
I don't have babies and never will, so I don't really have to worry about this.
That being said, however, I have no problem with babies at restaurants, as long as they are taught to behave. If junior starts acting up, it's his parents' responsibility to either calm him down or remove him, out of courtesy to other customers.
ETA: Even if I were a parent, I don't know that I'd really enjoy going out to dinner with my children. From what I remember, my mother hardly got to enjoy her own meal when we went out because she was cutting her kids' food/bringing someone to the bathroom/entertaining one of the kids. If I were to go out with my husband, I'd just want some "us" time.0 -
it would be interesting to see how many of the people who don't like children "spoiling" their meals don't have kids of their own?
I have 3- screaming kids in restaurants is unacceptable- ALWAYS. Take them out- accept you need a time out for a while from certain places while the kids are young. Before you know they are teens who want nothing to do with you- take your dates then or get a sitter. As a mother of 3 I am here to tell you I do NOT want to hear any kids when I am trying to have an adult evening. I dont want to hear mine, yours or any. Love my kids- tolerate others' - but not in adult venues.
I agree with you!!
Why does a "Family" restaurant make people think they can let their kids act like wild heathens?! I sometimes go to "family" restaurants and I expect my 5 kids to behave. If for ANY reason your kid can't sit and behave then don't go to sit down restaurants. It's that simple. Take them to McDonalds, Chucke Cheese etc.0 -
You just referred to someones child as "it"... :huh:
I call my kids "it" matter of fact thats my 9 year olds nickname!
Along with Sponge, Ickybobcrane!
I call mine The Kid, Thing 2 and Painy. Ppl have called me out- move along nothing to see here. "it" is good- when said with love- all these names are cute. Not cute- allowing lil angel babe to cry while Im trying to eat. Then I call it crotch fruit. Rotten crotch fruit at that.
yesssssssssss new moon! thas how i feeel! mine are said with love and feelings!0 -
OK I'm going to try to sayt his nicely and by no means did we take our son to fancy rest. but.....
Our son had a medical issue that caused him to become feeding tube dependant for a little over 2 years. He never learned to "eat" like a normal child. We did intensive therapy with early intervention and 2 children's hospitals in order to "teach" him to eat again.
ON top of that, he is non medicated ADHD.
Eating out is hard.
When he was little we tried to go out to eat right after a feeding session at home when either he ate enough orall or I tubed the rest into his feeding tube. Then we had to wait about an hour and head out to eat.
I couldn't just drop him off at a baby sitter.....this was a medically complex kid (healthy now thank GOD) on multiple medications that all had to be timed apart.
At one point one of our early intervention goals was to start doing feeding therapy in public because well, people EAT in public. WE all do.
You would not believe the stares we got. To others, it looked like I had the most spoiled kid on the planet. He would kick, sometimes scream, I started out only feeding him a "snack" at the mall in the food court.
Fast foward to now, he's 5.5 (still unmedicated ADHD) but still does not understand all the "social" skills that come with eating out. He still only eats because it's on a schedule. Very rarely does he eat because he is hungry or likes very much the food put in front of him.
If you saw us out to eat, yes I am still feeding him with his fork or mine or whatever I can get my hands on in order for him to eat. That's just how it is. He will be on his knees, under the table, asking about everything around us. His mind runs 100 MPH 24 horus a day.
It's not because he is a brat, it's because he got dealt a ****ty hand in life and we are still paying the consequences to this day.
We are just glad and amazed he eats by mouth at all. The original goal was to have his tube out by the time he entered K5, well, he enters K5 in the fall and got his tube removed before starting K3. He beat his goal by 2 years people, that is amazing.
I also know a HUGE amount of tube fed children on line. He is the ONLY child I know of how has gone from 100% tube fed to completely oral all at home and did not have to be admitted into an intense rehibilitation feeding program at a children's hospital.
So, please be compassionate when you see a family struggling while they are out to eat. I cannot tell you how many times I would go home and just cry. We got horrible looks all the time.
of course sympathy is called for in your case. but Id have to ask anyway- why not make life easier on all of you and use restaurants that are more appropriate for the behavior? If not for him but yourself. Instead of eating somewhere nice or even borderline nice (chain restaurants) why not mc donalds, chuck e cheese or chick fil A etc.
When my kids were out of control (terrible 2s- boys, basically untrained animals til about 2. 5 or 3 yrs old) Id stay home. Simple. In time they grew into humans and we go where ever we want. They act like gentleman at the table and Im not stressed or crying when I get home.
As I said - you have a certain situation that is unlike most of us. Why not take an easy road once in a while- if not for some peace to others- but for your own sanity.
^THIS^
I feel bad for parents in this situation, but a melt down is still a melt down. If the child can't for whatever reason behave then leave. They got dirty looks because they were ruining evreone else's meal. While it's not fair that they can't go out because of thier child's medical problems, it's not fair to anyone else in the restaurant either.0 -
My daughter was completely different. I've been taking her to symphonies since she was not quite three. She sits still and if she starts getting a little loud, you tell her and she immediately takes it down a notch.
This!!! I love Broadway, and I take my daughter to shows with me, she LOVES it, stays in her seat, is quiet and frankly mesmerized by the show.... maybe this year we will try an opera!!!
Its the parents job to teach the child how to behave, was my daughter an angel at 2 or 3, no... but we continue to take her everywhere and she has learned and now at age 5, she understands how to behave in public.0 -
Sorry but I brought my daughter everwhere with us. I work full time and I would never leave her to go out to eat. I spent enough time away from her. And If I am paying $25 a plate then they can put up with my child is the way I see it. She never had crying fits however she was good even as an infant and I think in that case I would of brought her outside till she calmed down. But yes I would bring a child to a high class restaurant.0
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Crying children in restaurants are not as bad as in movie theatres. Thats, what really gets on my nerve! Also people, who constantly talk in movie theatres. Adults can be worse than children.0
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I've tried to take mine... But they bark and bark and bark. It was pretty embarrassing for me. Why can't my kids just sit there and look cute, and stay still? Like other cute Poms do? They are only at their best behavior when I have a greenie in my pocket. But besides that, they tell me what to do. Guess Im one of those parents that gets bossed around by the kids.
Some kids really boss around their parents, and are spoiled brats these days. They learn early how to get their way don't they? Seems like its a minority nowdays that parents have a good balance between the discipline and rewarding system for good and bad behavior. Some do a good job thou. I know some that are pretty great. Butt some should start out with dogs, before they have humans.. And even then I wouldn't suggest having humans for some of those people. It is a nice change when you see those that have well behaved children. Although every child is going to cry from time to time, because they have needs that should be met by the parent. I'd cry too if my parent ignored my needs.0 -
I was traveling alone with my small children and got into a situation that my children were getting fussy at a restaurant and we had just ordered. It started to escalate. Being on a tight budget and not wanting to just walk out on my food I politely explained to fellow patrons that I would be leaving just as soon as my food arrived. The kind waitress boxed my food and got it to me in record time. Fastest service I ever saw. This was not an upscale restaurant by any means but I think that appropriate behavior should be practiced in all public settings. I have had strangers kids take french fries off my tray at McDonald's as the parents stand by thinking it is cute!0
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My daughter was completely different. I've been taking her to symphonies since she was not quite three. She sits still and if she starts getting a little loud, you tell her and she immediately takes it down a notch.
This!!! I love Broadway, and I take my daughter to shows with me, she LOVES it, stays in her seat, is quiet and frankly mesmerized by the show.... maybe this year we will try an opera!!!
Its the parents job to teach the child how to behave, was my daughter an angel at 2 or 3, no... but we continue to take her everywhere and she has learned and now at age 5, she understands how to behave in public.
Yes! Most of the time it is the parents fault not the child's. And you have to start at a young age!0 -
I took my 3 kids to any restaurant ( or any place) I wanted to. They were taught how to behave, If they didn't behave they soon learned the error of their ways. Then we went back in and sat and finished our meals (or whatever). From that point they knew what was expected of them. I was never afraid to take them anywhere by myself. I had people tell me how well behaved they were. Now I take my granddaughter places with me and she's well behaved also. Kids are kids they will test you at every opportunity they can. You just have to set guidelines for them to follow and be very consistent with them (you cant be wishey washy with them).0
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You just referred to someones child as "it"... :huh:
I call my kids "it" matter of fact thats my 9 year olds nickname!
Along with Sponge, Ickybobcrane!
I call mine The Kid, Thing 2 and Painy. Ppl have called me out- move along nothing to see here. "it" is good- when said with love- all these names are cute. Not cute- allowing lil angel babe to cry while Im trying to eat. Then I call it crotch fruit. Rotten crotch fruit at that.
yesssssssssss new moon! thas how i feeel! mine are said with love and feelings!
So I'm guessing you would'nt mind someone other than yourself saying this about your child to your face ...you " just let it sit in it's carrier and scream."0 -
Seems to me people are pretty much echoing my opinion. I wasn't talking children, I was talking BABIES. Hence the word babies. And the fact that he/she/the child (I don't know, which is why I said it, geez, relax) was in a carrier.
And no, I don't have kids. But I have worked in the service industry most of my life. I always appreciate well behaved children, and usually compliment parents on their kids. I guess my irritation is definitely the fact that the child was left to scream untended. As soon as they picked it up to leave it stopped crying. Probably just needed a little soothing, poor thing.
I love kids. I do not love screaming infants in restaurants, and I never will. No one NEEDS to go to an oyster house. We went there for a special occasion. Yes there are always extenuating circumstances, and I probably mispoke by generalizing to every baby on the planet. You can't teach a BABY how to behave in a restaurant. All I was really saying is, if it's crying, pick it up, soothe it, feed it etc. CHILDREN absolutely need to be taught how to behave in public, but maybe an Oyster House should be say, level 5.
We were also there at 8:30pm.
Anyways, thanks for all the replies!0 -
I take my son everywhere. If we go out to eat he comes. But I make sure to have a few toys (quiet) he can play with, his bottle incase he is also hungry. Granted he isn't a fuss baby so when are out he has never screamed, but if I am going so is he. And if you were on vacation how would you feel if you really wanted to go out to a nice dinner but didn't have anyone to watch your kid (I know you don't have any yet, but hypothetically)? And they should have done something to keep them quiet I agree with that also.
My .020 -
Crying children in restaurants are not as bad as in movie theatres. Thats, what really gets on my nerve! Also people, who constantly talk in movie theatres. Adults can be worse than children.
I totally agree with this....0 -
I have a 7 year old and I agree with you. I hate screaming babies in any place (store, food, movie). When she was a baby or toddler, my daughter was not allowed to do that and if she started, she was taken out. Its easier to calm a baby vs a toddler. Now its not an issues but it irks the day lights out of me when parents simply dont care.0
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