"southern hospitality" myth or no?

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Replies

  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.


    Why do I "insist" on calling it the south? Because I'm from New Jersey, so to me it's the south. Why wouldn't it be? It's further south than South Carolina.

    Any place where outsiders are called "damn yankees" I consider the south. And I heard this many times in Texas. So I consider Texas the south.
  • TyFit08
    TyFit08 Posts: 799 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.


    Why do I "insist" on calling it the south? Because I'm from New Jersey, so to me it's the south. Why wouldn't it be? It's further south than South Carolina.

    Any place where outsiders are called "damn yankees" I consider the south. And I heard this many times in Texas. So I consider Texas the south.

    That's because Texans don't know the war is over. Funny thing, my family is from the Carolinas never heard them say damn Yankees.

    Texas is NOT DOWN SOUTH. It is the Southwest or better yet, its just Texas. That would be like calling New Jersey New England, close but not quite. As a New Yorker who has lived in Texas and family is from Down South (which is basically the Carolinas, Georgia, Alabama etc) I have to say that many Northerners need geography lessons.
  • Southern hospitality does still exist - it's the idea that you can share food with someone, have a nice conversation at a grocery store, and so on. The key is to make sure politics and religion never come up!

    Southern hospitality doesn't necessarily mean that you're better around friends and family than people in the North. It has to do with being more diplomatic/pleasant with people you don't know very well. While it may seem too superficial for people who are used to bluntness, it's about making errands, tasks and brief acquaintances more pleasant.

    This is exactly it. It's all about being more polite to strangers
  • Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.


    Why do I "insist" on calling it the south? Because I'm from New Jersey, so to me it's the south. Why wouldn't it be? It's further south than South Carolina.

    Any place where outsiders are called "damn yankees" I consider the south. And I heard this many times in Texas. So I consider Texas the south.

    I'm from the Carolinas, born and raised, and I've never once heard some say "damn yankees" at least not seriously
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.

    Southern Hospitality is about making you feel welcome and yes I do think Southerners welcome strangers. I have seen my family in South Carolina do it, while my family in NY always looks at outsiders with a degree of skepticism. But I'm right there with them. I'm not going to act like I'm your best friend if I don't know you. Not to say that some Southerners aren't genuine, I like the what you see is what you get approach.

    We are actually more "South Central" as we aren't in the West either... But I do believe it has something to do with us siding with the Confederates in the Civil War.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.

    Southern Hospitality is about making you feel welcome and yes I do think Southerners welcome strangers. I have seen my family in South Carolina do it, while my family in NY always looks at outsiders with a degree of skepticism. But I'm right there with them. I'm not going to act like I'm your best friend if I don't know you. Not to say that some Southerners aren't genuine, I like the what you see is what you get approach.
    Pretty sure any state that hopped on the Confederacy band wagon is in the south. Just sayin'.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.

    Southern Hospitality is about making you feel welcome and yes I do think Southerners welcome strangers. I have seen my family in South Carolina do it, while my family in NY always looks at outsiders with a degree of skepticism. But I'm right there with them. I'm not going to act like I'm your best friend if I don't know you. Not to say that some Southerners aren't genuine, I like the what you see is what you get approach.

    We are actually more "South Central" as we aren't in the West either... But I do believe it has something to do with us siding with the Confederates in the Civil War.
    And you beat me to it.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    I agree with the opinion that it's because there way too many transplants (not that everyone ain't welcome or anything) and the social/cultural dynamics change...


    Oh and "bless your heart" is not a compliment... at all... It is usually is something that comes after a round of gossip.
  • My family is very southern...hailing from Alabama, Mississippi, Tennessee, Texas and Lousiana - very hospitable and a bit old-fashion! As a matter of fact, my mom would give me the "look" if I ever brought a male guest over for dinner and not fix his plate.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.


    Why do I "insist" on calling it the south? Because I'm from New Jersey, so to me it's the south. Why wouldn't it be? It's further south than South Carolina.

    Yankees think everyone else is the South. :laugh:

    Honestly, much of Texas is closer to the West, in terms of attitudes and culture, than they are the South. {And for the record, those of us in the Midwest, (e.g. Kansas City, the middle) aren't in the South either. :wink: }
  • ShreddedTweet
    ShreddedTweet Posts: 1,326 Member
    I come from a small town and honestly when I moved to the city I found it hard not to smile and say 'Hello' or 'Lovely day' to everyone who made eye contact as you passed each other on the street! *rolls eyes at my youthful naivety*
  • TyFit08
    TyFit08 Posts: 799 Member
    Personally I have found a part of Southern Hospitality, ex, being friendly to stranger being rooted in nosiness. At least in my experience most of the random strangers that have started talking to me or that I have witnessed my family start talking to, did so because they wanted to know who I was or what I was about or why I was there. That is why I prefer the North, we don't care about your business and aren't going to go out of our way to know it.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.


    Why do I "insist" on calling it the south? Because I'm from New Jersey, so to me it's the south. Why wouldn't it be? It's further south than South Carolina.

    Any place where outsiders are called "damn yankees" I consider the south. And I heard this many times in Texas. So I consider Texas the south.

    That's because Texans don't know the war is over. Funny thing, my family is from the Carolinas never heard them say damn Yankees.

    Texas is NOT DOWN SOUTH. It is the Southwest or better yet, its just Texas. That would be like calling New Jersey New England, close but not quite. As a New Yorker who has lived in Texas and family is from Down South (which is basically the Carolinas, Georgia, Alabama etc) I have to say that many Northerners need geography lessons.
    Texans don't know the war is over??? Seriously???? Good to know I'm a big, fat, racist.

    Oh and Carolinas are not Down South, sweetcheeks. They're the east coast. Yayyyyy for geography.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    I come from a small town and honestly when I moved to the city I found it hard not to smile and say 'Hello' or 'Lovely day' to everyone who made eye contact as you passed each other on the street! *rolls eyes at my youthful naivety*
    You'd fit right in here, dahlin'.
  • Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.

    Southern Hospitality is about making you feel welcome and yes I do think Southerners welcome strangers. I have seen my family in South Carolina do it, while my family in NY always looks at outsiders with a degree of skepticism. But I'm right there with them. I'm not going to act like I'm your best friend if I don't know you. Not to say that some Southerners aren't genuine, I like the what you see is what you get approach.

    We are actually more "South Central" as we aren't in the West either... But I do believe it has something to do with us siding with the Confederates in the Civil War.
    And you beat me to it.

    Actually Texans are considered both Southeastern and Southwestern...just because we can be!
  • jran3
    jran3 Posts: 105 Member
    it pays to be nice when everyone carries guns

    An armed society is a polite society.
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,810 Member
    I notice a difference when I travel to other places. Not saying people are SUPER nice in the south or anything, but I'm used to strangers smiling at you, men (that I don't know) holding doors open, being referred to as "ma'am," etc...every time I've visited family in the northeast and on the west coast, I notice that the generally "warm" vibe that people where I'm from give off is absent. Not that people are exceptionally rude or anything, but it's just different. Every time my family from both areas have come to visit here, they've always commented on how friendly people seem to be. "Seem to be" being the key phrase...

    I'm from Texas, btw...and yes, I consider myself from the South...Southwest, to me, means New Mexico and Arizona...
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.

    Southern Hospitality is about making you feel welcome and yes I do think Southerners welcome strangers. I have seen my family in South Carolina do it, while my family in NY always looks at outsiders with a degree of skepticism. But I'm right there with them. I'm not going to act like I'm your best friend if I don't know you. Not to say that some Southerners aren't genuine, I like the what you see is what you get approach.

    We are actually more "South Central" as we aren't in the West either... But I do believe it has something to do with us siding with the Confederates in the Civil War.
    And you beat me to it.

    Actually Texans are considered both Southeastern and Southwestern...just because we can be!
    Texas is quite large. Texas has been called the South, the Midwest, the Southwest, the Southeast. The only thing it's definately not is the North.
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,810 Member
    it pays to be nice when everyone carries guns

    An armed society is a polite society.

    Hahahaha TRUE STORY
  • zoegator
    zoegator Posts: 165 Member
    I think "Southern Hospitality" is more of a stranger-type thing, rather than once you actually get to know the person. On the surface, among strangers, I've found that in the South people are nicer than people in the North; you're more likely to have a person hold the door open for you in the South, or smile when passing, or something like that. However, when it comes down to it, in the long run, once you get to know people from the South and North, they're the same.
    (IMO anyway)
  • roachhaley
    roachhaley Posts: 978 Member
    I do think people are more friendly in the South. I definitely know that people from up north are ruder on the telephone - I have a summer job at a call center that deals mostly with people from NY and NJ and BOOOOOOY are they rude! Maybe its because they know they're getting sucked into a bad deal, deep down... (i'm a third party verifier)
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    i lived in georgia for a few months when my ex was in the army. a neighbor came over to invite me over for easter. (i had never exchanged a single word with him prior to this.)
    i thought it was sweet/kinda creepy. my friend said it was normal for people in the south to do it.
    i didn't go, but i wish i had now.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.

    Southern Hospitality is about making you feel welcome and yes I do think Southerners welcome strangers. I have seen my family in South Carolina do it, while my family in NY always looks at outsiders with a degree of skepticism. But I'm right there with them. I'm not going to act like I'm your best friend if I don't know you. Not to say that some Southerners aren't genuine, I like the what you see is what you get approach.
    Pretty sure any state that hopped on the Confederacy band wagon is in the south. Just sayin'.

    the Southwest, there ya go. That says it better than I did.

    ...

    Missouri was split. Many Missourians didn't take kindly to federal troops coming in and wreaking havoc. But mostly, we didn't join any side until the Jayhawkers from Kansas came and did worse than the feds. After our Bushwackers stormed Lawerence, KS, and and made a mess of them, many Missourians high-tailed it to Texas, just as the war was ending. Some of them came back to Missouri after the war; some stayed in Texas.

    I've lived in Missouri my whole life, pretty much just the Kansas City area, but I lived in SW Missouri in the Ozarks for a while. If there was ever such a thing as friendly folks, it's the Ozarks, bar none. Kansas City has some pretty friendly folks too, but when you start to see the rolling hills of the Ozarks, you know you've hit the Promised Land. :smile:
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,810 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.


    Why do I "insist" on calling it the south? Because I'm from New Jersey, so to me it's the south. Why wouldn't it be? It's further south than South Carolina.

    Any place where outsiders are called "damn yankees" I consider the south. And I heard this many times in Texas. So I consider Texas the south.

    That's because Texans don't know the war is over. Funny thing, my family is from the Carolinas never heard them say damn Yankees.

    Texas is NOT DOWN SOUTH. It is the Southwest or better yet, its just Texas. That would be like calling New Jersey New England, close but not quite. As a New Yorker who has lived in Texas and family is from Down South (which is basically the Carolinas, Georgia, Alabama etc) I have to say that many Northerners need geography lessons.

    Born and raised Texan and not only do I not know a single person who uses the phrase "damn yankees" seriously, but I'm well aware the war is over. We're all well aware. We have a LOT of state pride, but please, don't confuse that for being uneducated.
  • jran3
    jran3 Posts: 105 Member
    I'm born and raised in Alabama. Never lived anywhere else. Yes there's nice people everywhere. "Southern Hospitality" doesn't mean everyone in the South (Southeastern U.S.) is nice. There's azzholes everywhere. But we are culturally different about manners, treating women like ladies, chivalry, etc. I think it's a good thing.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.


    Why do I "insist" on calling it the south? Because I'm from New Jersey, so to me it's the south. Why wouldn't it be? It's further south than South Carolina.

    Any place where outsiders are called "damn yankees" I consider the south. And I heard this many times in Texas. So I consider Texas the south.

    That's because Texans don't know the war is over. Funny thing, my family is from the Carolinas never heard them say damn Yankees.

    Texas is NOT DOWN SOUTH. It is the Southwest or better yet, its just Texas. That would be like calling New Jersey New England, close but not quite. As a New Yorker who has lived in Texas and family is from Down South (which is basically the Carolinas, Georgia, Alabama etc) I have to say that many Northerners need geography lessons.
    Texans don't know the war is over??? Seriously???? Good to know I'm a big, fat, racist.

    Oh and Carolinas are not Down South, sweetcheeks. They're the east coast. Yayyyyy for geography.

    Dang it! I guess I missed getting my required Confederacy flag at the meeting.

    Oh and the Southwest in usually considered as Arizona and New Mexico, primarily speaking... (and just reading back Meredith beat me to that one as well)... with that said, the labels of locations are greatly fluid... Anything south of the Mason Dixon line is considered "the South"... Whether it be Texas, Virginia or the Carolina's...

    For example, South Carolina is considered the East Coast, the South, And Southeast United States. Ohio is considered the Great Lakes, Midwest and the North.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    Why do people insist on calling Texas the South, Southwest yes, Down South no.


    Why do I "insist" on calling it the south? Because I'm from New Jersey, so to me it's the south. Why wouldn't it be? It's further south than South Carolina.

    Any place where outsiders are called "damn yankees" I consider the south. And I heard this many times in Texas. So I consider Texas the south.

    That's because Texans don't know the war is over. Funny thing, my family is from the Carolinas never heard them say damn Yankees.

    Texas is NOT DOWN SOUTH. It is the Southwest or better yet, its just Texas. That would be like calling New Jersey New England, close but not quite. As a New Yorker who has lived in Texas and family is from Down South (which is basically the Carolinas, Georgia, Alabama etc) I have to say that many Northerners need geography lessons.
    Texans don't know the war is over??? Seriously???? Good to know I'm a big, fat, racist.

    Oh and Carolinas are not Down South, sweetcheeks. They're the east coast. Yayyyyy for geography.

    Geography is MORE than maps. The Carolinas are part of the ORIGINAL South. Culturally, they are as Southern as they come. :wink:
  • mvtrail
    mvtrail Posts: 13 Member
    I am from NY and live in SC. I think people in the north and south are just different. Everyone in the south thinks "Yankees" are rude. When this is a generalization too. I am not rude, and I also enjoy the laid back lifestyle in SC. And Bless Your Heart is not nice!!!
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    it pays to be nice when everyone carries guns

    An armed society is a polite society.

    Amen and pass the ammo! :laugh:
  • sthrnchick
    sthrnchick Posts: 771
    Having been born and raised in South Carolina....I would have to say "culturally" Southerners are nice in general...of course there are jerks EVERYWHERE and wecertainly have our fair share here.....I had an out of town guest in from the West Coast last week and he was constantly laughing or commenting about how friendly everyone here is...I do think Southern Hospitality is a real thing!