Weight loss surgery...
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I'm not looking for sympathy or support and I'm not trolling. I just need to talk openly and honestly to people other than my family. I need real answers.
I am just one of those people that have to be perfect at everything I do. School, work....everything. I was a three sport athlete in high school and was the captain of all 3 sports. I have always been a 4.0 student.
My husband is in the process of getting gastric bypass thanks to his VA medical coverage. He has really bad sleep apnea so I know what a horrible condition it can be. My mother-in-law had gastric by pass 2 years ago and now looks like she can blow away in the wind. I am a research FREAK and know every single pro and con there is.
No one takes me serious and my family tells me they love me no matter what I look like. I know weight loss surgery isn't a "magic bullet" and I know the work that goes in to it. I have had 5 abdominal surgeries over the past 3 years so surgery doesn't scare me. I saw a dietitian today who looked at my food journaling for the past 9 months ( I started long before joining MFP) and told me there is nothing they could recommend that I'm not doing or haven't already done. They told me I need to embrace my body and realize I'll never be my ideal weight. I've seen personal trainers and doctors about my excess testosterone levels which make my muscles unusually bulky and they said I need to avoid all weight bearing activities.
I just can't accept defeat or not being the best. It's not who I am. There has to be an answer and if surgery isn't what is going to help me there has to be something out there that can.0 -
Wow. I have a lot to say in regards to this topic and thread. As a person who has been told by doctors that WLS is a very good option for me, and also as a person who every immediate family member has had, I can tell you my experiences going through consultations, the pre-surgery requirements, the pro's and cons, things you need to understand about WLS, and someone who's witnessed several different types of complications my family members have gone through.
Health Diagnosis:
I am diagnosed with PCOS, Endometriosis, & Intersticial Cystitis. I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism, a heart murmur at the age of 9 (which has resolved itself), and a rare kidney disorder. In addition to physical diagnosis' I am also on medication for chronic depression, high blood pressure, & hypothyroidism.
Weight:
Currently I'm overweight by 150+ pounds. This has caused my depression to spiral as well.
WLS Consultation:
Although I am a candidate because I am overweight by more than 100 pounds, I also have had problems in the past with skin rashes and at the time of consultation (was borderline diabetic). My consultation was about a year ago. I had serious hesitations because I have seen so many complications in three different family members which have all required additional surgeries. I was looking for the lap band because I figured it was reversible, although I was informed that the majority of people only lose about 50% of the weight that they are overweight by, with the help of proper diet and exercise. I was recommended for gastric bypass. I learned through the consultation that this was also reversible, but the percentages of weight loss were much higher. My potential surgeon said, "I've never once seen someone say, jeez, I'm unhappy that I've lost 100 pounds, so I want to reverse it."
Things I Learned Through Consultation + Pro's & Con's:
(Disclaimer: Some of these things are mandated by your insurance, although most WLS pre-op requirements include these)
- You have to lose 10% of your body weight before surgery takes place. They usually give you a 6 month time frame to do so.
- You have weekly weigh ins, and need to track your diet, exercise, blood pressure, and resting heart rate twice a day, and be ready to prepare it.
- If you skip a month of not logging your diet and exercise and getting it approved by either a nutritionist or doctor, you WILL have to start over. In my program, you had to do this for 6 months in a row.
- You have to attend certain group meetings at least once a week in order to prepare you and discuss with others about your surgery
- You go through rigorous medical pre-op testing that is usually spread out through a few weeks, including a sleep apnea test. I did the majority of testing including sleep apnea (although I did not have the surgery).
- You have to meet with a psychologist and a psychiatrist to have a mental evaluation to determine your mental health going into this, and if you are ready for the surgery.
- You have to meet with a nutritionist at least once to outline a proper diet and exercise plan. (Most people see them once every month because they need their food and exercise journal approved, if you do not go to your regular physician).
- Some WLS programs require you to complete reading a book, and then be tested on it. Some even require a course, which means attending them on a regular basis.
- You will meet with your surgeon at least once a month to check on progress. My surgeon required me to go out and buy four books to read. He was fantastic at educating me, and making sure I had enough knowledge to know if I wanted this for myself.
- There are many other requirements we can discuss if you want to message me personally. These are just a few of them.
- This is up to you, there is no one who is going to force you to go to meetings, appointments, weigh-ins - you really have to be diligent and want it for yourself.
- THIS IS A TOOL JUST LIKE MFP IS A TOOL, NOT A FIX ALL. YOU STILL HAVE TO MANAGE YOUR FOOD INTAKE, CALORIES, PORTION CONTROL, NUTRITION, & STAY ON AN EXERCISE PLAN.
- THIS IS NOT AN EASY WAY OUT. IN MANY WAYS, THIS IS HARDER THAN TRYING TO LOSE WEIGHT ON YOUR OWN.
- SOME PEOPLE HAVE NUTRITIONAL DEFICIENCIES POST-SURGERY. THIS ALSO NEEDS TO BE MANAGED DILIGENTLY.
- DEPENDING ON WHICH PROCEDURE YOU CHOOSE, THERE ARE FOLLOW UP PROCEDURES, AS WELL AS COMPLICATIONS THAT PEOPLE MAY NOT REALIZE.
The choice is totally up to you. This isn't just a cosmetic surgery, this is a life changing operation. This will change your life forever. You cannot lie, cheat, or fake your way into becoming eligible for this surgery. Although, again like I said before, THIS IS A TOOL. It is a LIFE CHANGING TOOL. It is nothing more than that. If you choose to not take it seriously post-op, and don't work out, you will be left with sagging skin, that isn't pretty either. My mother made a choice not to exercise, and is still fighting with the depression that now comes along with having excess skin everywhere. She had a choice to exercise and follow through her post-op food and exercise diary, in which she might have possibly been able to avoid skin flaps as a result, or her doctor would have been able to sign off on a surgery to remove them for NON COSMETIC REASONS.
Finally:
I joined MFP and was able to lose a substantial amount of weight without the surgery, which is what stopped me from going forward. However, I am paying for the medical pre-op testing I went through. I fell off the wagon a bit ago, and gained a lot (not all) of my weight back. However, it wasn't until I was brutally honest with myself, (I'm on a 1200 calorie DIET) that I realized I was not doing everything I could to lose weight. I have many medical problems against me, but I am NOT letting them be an excuse as to why I CANNOT lose weight. That is why I am back on MFP.
I wish you luck, I hope others also read this response and give me feedback based on my brutal honesty in this post. I may have gained some of my weight back, but at least I am actively trying to lose it again. If I can do it, with all of my medical "hindrances" - I believe anyone can.
xoxo0 -
Are you seeing an actual endocrinologist about the PCOS and possible thyroid issues? GP's sometimes don't catch on to things that an endo will. My GP said I was fine and my endo discovered a pituitary tumor.
I'm not a doctor, this is a little FYI!0 -
You know what surgery does for you? Forces you to eat cleaner and in small quantities with mild exercise or you get sick.
You know what losing weight naturally is? Eating cleaner and in small quantities with exercise lest you get fat.
I mean. It seems like a no-brainer. It's not magic. Save yourself the recovery, expense, and pain and stop making excuses.
And it is comments like this that make people who have had wls feel really good about themselves. My surgeon is involved in reasearch which has found that in the morbidly obese or super orbidly obese group those who have tried and lost weight 'by themselves' in whatever manner they have over 90% regain all that weight and more. Being in that state is an illness it is not 'making excuses'.
WLS is a tool to support weight loss and after that has been achieved, a healthy life. I will be seeing counsellors to address my overeating and issues with food to ensure I never go back to the way I was. For every person that has regained since surgery there are those who have maintained a healthy weight through controlling food and getting in exercise.
Please do not belittle people who have chosen the surgery route, you do not know the effect your words may have.
AGREED! I had bypass in April 2011 and have lost 110 pounds. I have NO side effects from surgery, aside from the fact that I feel AMAZING! WLS is a TOOL, people!
My comment-OOPS for the editing! --->You are lucky but I think you are in the minority with no side effects. And I think we all seem to be overlooking the fact that a lot of bypass patients regain their weight.
You're absolutely right... LOTS of WLS patients gain the weight back because they are not ready to make the changes that are required to succeed. I work out 5 days a week, maintain a balanced diet, take my vitamins, and see my psychiatrist and physician regularlyl like they have asked me. They warn you about this from the get-go, people choose not to believe it. I personally, refuse to allow myself to fail! I went through too much to get here; time, money, PAIN (not just physical), and hard work, just to revert back to old ways. Something just clicked in me after so many years of being overweight.0 -
Get the depression treated first. When you're depressed it can be impossible to see anything as it truly is. Being thin will not make you happy if the rest isn't right. Trust me, I know.0
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I'm not looking for sympathy or support and I'm not trolling. I just need to talk openly and honestly to people other than my family. I need real answers.
I am just one of those people that have to be perfect at everything I do. School, work....everything. I was a three sport athlete in high school and was the captain of all 3 sports. I have always been a 4.0 student.
My husband is in the process of getting gastric bypass thanks to his VA medical coverage. He has really bad sleep apnea so I know what a horrible condition it can be. My mother-in-law had gastric by pass 2 years ago and now looks like she can blow away in the wind. I am a research FREAK and know every single pro and con there is.
No one takes me serious and my family tells me they love me no matter what I look like. I know weight loss surgery isn't a "magic bullet" and I know the work that goes in to it. I have had 5 abdominal surgeries over the past 3 years so surgery doesn't scare me. I saw a dietitian today who looked at my food journaling for the past 9 months ( I started long before joining MFP) and told me there is nothing they could recommend that I'm not doing or haven't already done. They told me I need to embrace my body and realize I'll never be my ideal weight. I've seen personal trainers and doctors about my excess testosterone levels which make my muscles unusually bulky and they said I need to avoid all weight bearing activities.
I just can't accept defeat or not being the best. It's not who I am. There has to be an answer and if surgery isn't what is going to help me there has to be something out there that can.
Well based on what you've said, it sounds like you've tried everything you can possibly do short of having the surgery. If you feel the need for the surgery, go get a consultation. Otherwise, I think it might be your body's way of telling you that it has achieved its perfection. YOU may not be happy with it now, but you can certainly learn to be happy with it and embrace it. If all else fails, go talk to a therapist who can help you see your value, because if you know in your heart you have tried everything, and nothing else is working (and you don't have major weight related health issues) - you may just need to find the confidence within yourself.0 -
Your story caught my eye as my teenage daughter has gained a lot of weight recently and has had the same tests and the Dr won't do anymore, just told to walk and eat better. (which she does need to do) But I still am concerned there is an underlying medical problem. However, they did say if she came back in a few months eating better and exercising more and still gaining then they would look further. Perhaps you need to take your MFP reports and show the Dr what you've been eating/exercising and see if that makes a difference. Good luck to you.0
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This is a joke, right? Weight loss surgery has its own complications including DEATH! Why would you LIE to put yourself in a situation where you could be at risk for having a complication? Committing to a lifestyle change isn't easy and there will be setbacks, but you're young and you can lose weight if you try.
"Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice." <--- That's from your profile and I suggest you follow your own advice.0 -
She's considering lying to physicians and faking tests to qualify for surgery. This is someone that's making excuses. We're not talking about you, or anyone else.
All you know about her is what she posted above. You do not know her struggles, her life and what has put her in the position where she would even consider such behaviour. It is completely wrong for her to do this but just to be told she doesn't need surgery is not helpful....what excuses is she making?
I bet I can guess though, eating too much rubbish, taking zero responsibility and expecting someone else to fix it. Truth hurts
Just so you know I measure and weight everything. I feel sick with every bite of food. I have to force myself to reach the 1200 calorie goal. My family thinks I'm bordering on turning into an anorexic. Every bite of food I take makes me literally cry. The idea of having to eat back exercise calories makes me want to cut myself.
And that's how you got to 200+lbs?0 -
You can do it! Don't harm urself I just lost a friend to suicide. She has children that are left without a mother and everyone is guessing why she did it. Get some professional help. Track ur food, get out and exercise, don't waste time on failed diet plans or empty calories, drink plenty of water and anything that touches ur mouth u count! With support and a buddy u can do it but u have to put in the effort. Putting on the weight is easy, taking it off will be the hard part. I'm not knocking anyone who does the surgery but it's a cop out and a risk. From what you said on her with ur current mental state you wouldn't qualify. You going to feel better knowing u and only u were responsible for your weight loss. Turn this thing around and use ur MFP friends as support and encouragement.0
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I had a baby in November 2011 and have packed on 50 pounds just since February of this year! I have worked hard in the gym and eating healthy since January.
So you packed on 50 pounds over 7 months while working out hard and eating healthy????I have been eating 1200 caloires and trying to stick to low carb eating although I have to be careful with that since I've already had ketoacidosis once and was warned that it could kill me if it happens again.
You are obviously not actually eating 1200 calories per day if you're working out and still gaining weight. It's time to be honest with yourself! You are not helpless. You have complete control of what you eat and how much exercise you do.
As other posters already mentioned, the point of bariatric surgery is to force you to eat less. That's how it works. There is nothing magic about it. You just don't eat as much afterward b/c you can't.0 -
You sound desperate. #1 be thankful you do not have co morbitities, #2 you want to commit insurance freud? what type of example are you to your child.
Here is a plan for you as you seem to have your mind made up to have surgery. Which does benefit alot of people, in my professional opinion you are not a good candidate, FYI you can fake the psych test and appear to be ready for the surgery.
Talk to surgeons in your area ask them how much your out of pocket expense will be. Then save the money work 2 jobs. If you want this as badly as you say you do, you will work hard.
I know you will bellyache and claim it will take too long no child care these are all excuses. You stated you can do anything you put your mind to so put you r money where your mouth is. Either save the $$ get the surgery or lose the weight by yourself there either way you lose weight0 -
My thought is that if you get the weight loss the easy way without having to work for it and learn new lifestyle habits, nothing will change afterward to keep the weight from coming back. It might be a short-term solution but in the long-term it will just fuel the cycle of depression and self-loathing. If the weight loss is going to stick, you have to change your thinking patterns, eating and exercise habits on the whole and adopt a new lifestyle of healthy choices. I will be praying that you find hope and healing and a renewed mind!0
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I had a baby in November 2011 and have packed on 50 pounds just since February of this year! I have worked hard in the gym and eating healthy since January.
So you packed on 50 pounds over 7 months while working out hard and eating healthy????I have been eating 1200 caloires and trying to stick to low carb eating although I have to be careful with that since I've already had ketoacidosis once and was warned that it could kill me if it happens again.
You are obviously not actually eating 1200 calories per day if you're working out and still gaining weight. It's time to be honest with yourself! You are not helpless. You have complete control of what you eat and how much exercise you do.
As other posters already mentioned, the point of bariatric surgery is to force you to eat less. That's how it works. There is nothing magic about it. You just don't eat as much afterward b/c you can't.
That is so not the point of surgery. I truly wish people would educate themselves on the subject before posting like they know what they are talking about. There is a lot more to it than simply not being able to eat as much.0 -
I'm sorry some people on this message board have been mean to you. "Disgusting" is not a word that should be used to describe any human being. "Disgusting" is a great word for the attitude of a a person who thinks they are entitled to judge the feelings of desperation from a person who is reaching out for help.
I agree that surgery is an excellent option if your physician, under normal honest conditions, thinks that it is in your best interest.
I also agree that you should seek immediate help for your depression. I have battled depression for years, and I know what you're going through. There is so much more to you than your outside appearance.
Other than that, keep your chin up, and keep trying your best. You can do it. Hang in there.0 -
I had a baby in November 2011 and have packed on 50 pounds just since February of this year! I have worked hard in the gym and eating healthy since January.
So you packed on 50 pounds over 7 months while working out hard and eating healthy????I have been eating 1200 caloires and trying to stick to low carb eating although I have to be careful with that since I've already had ketoacidosis once and was warned that it could kill me if it happens again.
You are obviously not actually eating 1200 calories per day if you're working out and still gaining weight. It's time to be honest with yourself! You are not helpless. You have complete control of what you eat and how much exercise you do.
As other posters already mentioned, the point of bariatric surgery is to force you to eat less. That's how it works. There is nothing magic about it. You just don't eat as much afterward b/c you can't.
That is so not the point of surgery. I truly wish people would educate themselves on the subject before posting like they know what they are talking about. There is a lot more to it than simply not being able to eat as much.
Agreed.0 -
I'm sorry some people on this message board have been mean to you. "Disgusting" is not a word that should be used to describe any human being. "Disgusting" is a great word for the attitude of a a person who thinks they are entitled to judge the feelings of desperation from a person who is reaching out for help.
I agree that surgery is an excellent option if your physician, under normal honest conditions, thinks that it is in your best interest.
I also agree that you should seek immediate help for your depression. I have battled depression for years, and I know what you're going through. There is so much more to you than your outside appearance.
Other than that, keep your chin up, and keep trying your best. You can do it. Hang in there.
Also Agreed.0 -
I saw a dietitian today who looked at my food journaling for the past 9 months ( I started long before joining MFP) and told me there is nothing they could recommend that I'm not doing or haven't already done. They told me I need to embrace my body and realize I'll never be my ideal weight. I've seen personal trainers and doctors about my excess testosterone levels which make my muscles unusually bulky and they said I need to avoid all weight bearing activities.
You honestly must be delusional.0 -
By how you want to trick a physician to give you surgery that is proof to me that you haven't given your 110%. You should be ashamed.0
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Or maybe your weight is a result of your depression.
Also, don't go to jail for insurance fraud and not be able to raise your children.
Go to a doctor. NOW.0 -
i'm with everyone else. its absolutely despicable that you would LIE in order to get weight loss surgery!!! There are so many other people out there with ligitimate reasons for getting the surgery. Suck it up, stop putting food in your mouth and move your body EVERY DAY!!!!!!!0
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At 25y/o i am not sure you have yet explored all of your options and given traditional weight loss surgery a real try.
Weight loss surgery is a wonderful tool for those with metabolic issues that have made it impossible for them to lose weight by traditional methods alone. With no co-morbidities you are saying that this is not the case for you.
Also, it is by no means a quick fix. Most on this site have no real idea what weight loss surgery (WLS) entails. I do-- as I had surgery 18 months ago. I am 52 and I had every co-morbidity and metabolic disorder imaginable. So, i am very grateful for the tool of WLS as it has truly helped me to save my life.
It is true, the initial weight loss may occur faster than some other methods of weight loss you still must do ALL of the same things MFP encourages you to do now---eat healthy, exercise, drink lots of water, get plenty of protein, etc. But, it is also a major mental battle and if what you are saying now is true--you also would not pass the psych exam that is required to have this surgery.
You need to focus on getting HEALTHY (physically, emotionally, and mentally)--not on losing weight. When you focus on getting healthy, the weight will begin to drop.
Also, how long has it been since you had your child? Could it be that you are suffering from Post-partum depression?
Additionally, I would also see a good endocrinologist.
Lastly, be really honest with yourself---track every bite you put in your mouth, educate yourself on what foods are most healthy for your body, exercise faithfully every day. If you can't do these things now, weight surgery will not be effective as you will just regain the weight over time.0 -
Or maybe your weight is a result of your depression.
Also, don't go to jail for insurance fraud and not be able to raise your children.
Go to a doctor. NOW.
This. I've blogged a lot about how my depression has affected my health, specifically my weight [rainhoward.blogspot.com if you're interested]0 -
Go talk to my wife(Ashley_Panda) and let her tell you the daily *kitten* she has to deal with after weight loss surgery when she was 17....it has been a living hell for 7 years.0
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Hi,
I was looking at your diaries, and I personally feel you need to take a closer look at what you are eating -- I eat 1300 cals a day and I eat easily twice as much food as you do. Also if you weigh 250lbs, 1200 might be a bit low for you. Maybe try to increase it by 100-220 cals per day?
I think you need to give this more time. I started at 245 lbs, I have an underactive thyroid and I am still plugging along.
It is a lifestyle change and it takes TIME, anything that is a quick fix is teaching you nothing.. You can get weight loss surgery and gain it back, I have seen this with close friends.
And you can't fake a diabetes test. Not sure about the sleep apnea one, but I think that is obsurd to be honest. You need to just stick to it. 250 lbs is overweight but its not 'disgustingly fat' You can do it. I did, so you can too.0 -
My dear............ please know that losing weight will NOT solve all of your problems and make you suddenly happy. Although I can see that being heavy adds to your depression, losing weight will not automatically cure it. It sounds like you are a bit pre-disposed to it since you had self-mutilating behavior in the past with the cutting. I would honestly like to recommend that you find a counselor/psychologist in your area to talk to and share these things, maybe that will also help you figure out if your weight issue is something sub-conscious that is sabotaging your own efforts. It was brave of you to share your issues here, but I think having weight loss surgery before you're mentally prepared for it is a big big mistake. I wish you the best.0
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My husband had weight loss surgery with wonderful results 7 years ago. He would do it again in a heart beat. If you want to talk about the details give me a PM.0
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Weight loss is not instant and it takes time. You are only 25. You said you only started eating healthy in January. It sounds like to me, you need to find some wonderful friends and a great support group- a group of people who started out loving you unconditionally no matter what and who will support you no matter what you are going through. I'm going to suggest something to you that may sound kind of odd, but it may have some benefit if you give it a try, but it is not a quick fix. You need to first work on loving yourself and your family along with eating healthy. Focus on healthy mental exercises while you are working on yourself physically and i bet you will start to feel and see a different you. From your photo, it looks like you have a beautiful family and you just need to remember why you are working on yourself.0
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I would strongly suggest going to see a doctor for your depression....just losing the weight is not going to help. There has got to be a mental reason for the eating patterns. Not time you are stressed and reach for something to eat ask yourself why am I doing this? It is a daily struggle for me. I believe the weight is just a by product of the depression and they needs to be treated first. There is no shame in seeing someone for this. I get alot of flack from my family but I know it is helping to work out some issues and if nothing else make me more aware0
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My husband had weight loss surgery with wonderful results 7 years ago. He would do it again in a heart beat. If you want to talk about the details give me a PM.
Did he fake illnesses to get it?0
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