Plus Size Self Esteem

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Replies

  • CurlyGurlie88
    CurlyGurlie88 Posts: 89
    right on girl!
  • Lyssa62
    Lyssa62 Posts: 930 Member
    didn't mean to offend anybody skinny. all I said is a size 00 is not a size. That's crazy and I'm not saying it against the thin people I am saying it against whoever is changing the size of clothes. Growing up there wasn't such a thing as a 00 size of clothes...and believe me we had our share of twigs at school...but at least they wore a "real size".
  • kayemme
    kayemme Posts: 1,782 Member
    Just throwing this out there, why do people assume just because a person is heavyset, they are depressed with low self esteem? Believe it or not, there are gorgeous plus size people who give these skinny minnies a run for their money...Just don't get it...lol

    Around here, the old school "drowning yourself in food" is a common thought for the depression. Because we cant cope, we turn to food, blah blah blah.....

    Its alot of hocum

    i think that used to be the case when food was actually food, but now food's not really food, so it's way easier to gain weight without even realizing it. the worst part is it seems "normal" because it's blasted at you in every direction (television, billboards, internet... it's enough to make a person go MAD, i tell you: MAAAAAD) hehee

    but in seriousness, it used to be more of a stigma to be overweight because it actually takes a fair amount of effort to get heavy on real food which leans on gluttony, which is a big no no "por lo general".
  • kayemme
    kayemme Posts: 1,782 Member
    didn't mean to offend anybody skinny. all I said is a size 00 is not a size. That's crazy and I'm not saying it against the thin people I am saying it against whoever is changing the size of clothes. Growing up there wasn't such a thing as a 00 size of clothes...and believe me we had our share of twigs at school...but at least they wore a "real size".

    what you're talking about is vanity sizing.

    i am a vanity size 14, but in vintage clothing I am a 20. it's a pretty significant difference. it's all about what people want you to buy, so they market the clothing to appeal to the ego
  • barkin43
    barkin43 Posts: 508 Member
    Only thing I am unhappy about is all the skin on my belly.. *kitten* looks like an old ladies *kitten*!!!!
    Heyyy! I resemble that remark! Well, shucks, there goes my self esteem! I hope you're feeling really remorseful for that!
  • Lynxie83
    Lynxie83 Posts: 246
    didn't mean to offend anybody skinny. all I said is a size 00 is not a size. That's crazy and I'm not saying it against the thin people I am saying it against whoever is changing the size of clothes. Growing up there wasn't such a thing as a 00 size of clothes...and believe me we had our share of twigs at school...but at least they wore a "real size".

    Except in baby clothing! :bigsmile:

    Edit to actually add something on the confidence subject:

    I've almost always had high self esteem and confidence (except for a small blip in yrs 11-12 @ college) but it's always been something that I know others struggle with.

    Others in the topic may have already said this, it doesn't matter if you're plus sized, skinny, healthy, young or old, confidence and a high self-esteem is obtainable. I've always found surrounding yourself with positive and bubbly people helps, exercising has a very good side effect (endorphins!! yay) and having a good belly laugh helps too.

    High self-esteem is not a magic bean, some sort of mythical creature you can only capture if you sacrifice 20 virgins. It's not always easy to obtain, but it's totally worth it :bigsmile:
  • mirandamayhem
    mirandamayhem Posts: 772
    didn't mean to offend anybody skinny. all I said is a size 00 is not a size. That's crazy and I'm not saying it against the thin people I am saying it against whoever is changing the size of clothes. Growing up there wasn't such a thing as a 00 size of clothes...and believe me we had our share of twigs at school...but at least they wore a "real size".

    what you're talking about is vanity sizing.

    i am a vanity size 14, but in vintage clothing I am a 20. it's a pretty significant difference. it's all about what people want you to buy, so they market the clothing to appeal to the ego
    That darn vintage clothing problem! (Can't wait to get back into my vintage dresses!)
  • apocalypsepwnie
    apocalypsepwnie Posts: 373
    Wow I didn't realise that when I got to my goal weight I'd suddenly wake up and see that I didn't actually love myself, I was just trying to hide my anger for everyone that was thin.

    FFS!

    Body bashing is never acceptable. From anyone to anyone. I don't think skinny minny is a derogatory term. Pull your head in.

    This is what I meant about people taking out their feelings about the way I look and trying desperately to lunk them to me to justify that feeling.
    If someone told me I was disgusting, even if they were my size at one time, they would get a swift smack in the mouth. I'd only accept positive and supporting comments. Telling me I'm gross, dirty, foul, pathetic or lazy isn't going to help me at all.
    You're messed up in the head if you think that.

    I don't think it's right that someone can tell me I can't love myself because I'm bigger. I'm not sick. My weight does not make me sick. I am healthy and my doctors are always shocked at how healthy and normal I am. I'm not a crazy athlete but I'm not going to die from my weight. However, I don't want to develop anything from my weight as I have a family history of it with a loved one currently in hospital. So I'm changing that.
    Just because you hate me, doesn't mean I do. GROW UP!
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    didn't mean to offend anybody skinny. all I said is a size 00 is not a size. That's crazy and I'm not saying it against the thin people I am saying it against whoever is changing the size of clothes. Growing up there wasn't such a thing as a 00 size of clothes...and believe me we had our share of twigs at school...but at least they wore a "real size".

    Well, actually, it is a size now. Just because it wasn't a size when you were growing up doesn't mean it's imaginary now. So they changed the way they size clothes. It's done and now 00 is a size. And there are real, live people who wear that size.
  • mirandamayhem
    mirandamayhem Posts: 772
    didn't mean to offend anybody skinny. all I said is a size 00 is not a size. That's crazy and I'm not saying it against the thin people I am saying it against whoever is changing the size of clothes. Growing up there wasn't such a thing as a 00 size of clothes...and believe me we had our share of twigs at school...but at least they wore a "real size".

    Well, actually, it is a size now. Just because it wasn't a size when you were growing up doesn't mean it's imaginary now. So they changed the way they size clothes. It's done and now 00 is a size. And there are real, live people who wear that size.

    I think the issue here is the constant sizes changing, and not whether people wear them or not. There is no continuity. This whole vanity sizing has changed how sizes are perceived.
    And in a way I think it has made it more acceptable to be bigger. I'm not saying whether that is a bad thing or a good thing. But the very phrase itself "vanity sizing" places emphasis on a size being acceptable and a person feeling good about themselves based on the size they wear. It is dis-empowering, in the same way that telling a skinny person they are too skinny, or a fat person they are too fat is.
    Health At Every Size. Surely this is what we should be striving for. Being physically, and emotionally healthy wherever we stand on the planet!
    To feel liberated, whoever and wherever you are. To know you are more than a number, more than your appearance.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    didn't mean to offend anybody skinny. all I said is a size 00 is not a size. That's crazy and I'm not saying it against the thin people I am saying it against whoever is changing the size of clothes. Growing up there wasn't such a thing as a 00 size of clothes...and believe me we had our share of twigs at school...but at least they wore a "real size".

    Well, actually, it is a size now. Just because it wasn't a size when you were growing up doesn't mean it's imaginary now. So they changed the way they size clothes. It's done and now 00 is a size. And there are real, live people who wear that size.

    I think the issue here is the constant sizes changing, and not whether people wear them or not. There is no continuity. This whole vanity sizing has changed how sizes are perceived.
    And in a way I think it has made it more acceptable to be bigger. I'm not saying whether that is a bad thing or a good thing. But the very phrase itself "vanity sizing" places emphasis on a size being acceptable and a person feeling good about themselves based on the size they wear. It is dis-empowering, in the same way that telling a skinny person they are too skinny, or a fat person they are too fat is.
    Health At Every Size. Surely this is what we should be striving for. Being physically, and emotionally healthy wherever we stand on the planet!
    To feel liberated, whoever and wherever you are. To know you are more than a number, more than your appearance.

    I agree it's annoying -- even more so when you walk into one store and wear one size and then walk into another and it's too big or too small, not to mention that the exact same piece of clothing, in a different color, will not fit in the same size as another.

    But I found what was said about 00 not being a real size kind of insulting to the people who do actually wear it. It exists, whether you agree with it or not, you know? That's like saying size 28 isn't a size because no one should ever be that big. I don't think the fashion industry is going to change how it sizes clothes any time soon. If someone fits into a 00, that's the size that person wears.
  • poshcouture
    poshcouture Posts: 610
    I wake every morning and mentally prepare myself to walk out the door with my head up high and my self-esteem in the clouds. Why should I feel less than a person because I don't wear a size four? I can work it and strut with the best of them and damn it, I will do just that! I'm a work in progress, but I deserve to feel and look beautiful. I'm sassy, sexy, I can rock 5" heels and a sundress or sneakers and a football jersey and still make it classy.

    Whether you're a 24 for now and wanting that size 4 - find your self-esteem now! Don't wait to love yourself when you're in the "ideal clothing size." Hold that head up and work it!
  • apocalypsepwnie
    apocalypsepwnie Posts: 373
    didn't mean to offend anybody skinny. all I said is a size 00 is not a size. That's crazy and I'm not saying it against the thin people I am saying it against whoever is changing the size of clothes. Growing up there wasn't such a thing as a 00 size of clothes...and believe me we had our share of twigs at school...but at least they wore a "real size".

    Well, actually, it is a size now. Just because it wasn't a size when you were growing up doesn't mean it's imaginary now. So they changed the way they size clothes. It's done and now 00 is a size. And there are real, live people who wear that size.

    I think the issue here is the constant sizes changing, and not whether people wear them or not. There is no continuity. This whole vanity sizing has changed how sizes are perceived.
    And in a way I think it has made it more acceptable to be bigger. I'm not saying whether that is a bad thing or a good thing. But the very phrase itself "vanity sizing" places emphasis on a size being acceptable and a person feeling good about themselves based on the size they wear. It is dis-empowering, in the same way that telling a skinny person they are too skinny, or a fat person they are too fat is.
    Health At Every Size. Surely this is what we should be striving for. Being physically, and emotionally healthy wherever we stand on the planet!
    To feel liberated, whoever and wherever you are. To know you are more than a number, more than your appearance.

    I agree it's annoying -- even more so when you walk into one store and wear one size and then walk into another and it's too big or too small, not to mention that the exact same piece of clothing, in a different color, will not fit in the same size as another.

    But I found what was said about 00 not being a real size kind of insulting to the people who do actually wear it. It exists, whether you agree with it or not, you know? That's like saying size 28 isn't a size because no one should ever be that big. I don't think the fashion industry is going to change how it sizes clothes any time soon. If someone fits into a 00, that's the size that person wears.

    I agree with vanity sizing and inconsistencies within sizing being defeating. I am sad that people need the size on their label to validate them as a human. I use the sizing on my clothes (from brands I wear often and know) or the measurement of the waist/bust to guide me in my success of staying on track but it does not change the way I feel about myself as a person.
    I want to rule out the chance of going to an early grave or the very least not having a full elderly life because of my weight. I'm healthy now but who says that wont change.

    Look, I play derby. I've said it all over the place. If you really want to see WHY all sizes are acceptable go and see a bout. Every single player on that track is useful and effective no matter what their size. Some are big hitters, some are intimidating and others can shut down other players like a bomb. We learn to use our sizes to the best of our advantage against all players of all sizes. I had a girl who stands no more than 5 feet and weigh no more than 45kg/99lbs hand my butt to me the other day. I over double her weight and stand 4 inches taller.
    Even at my size I can keep up fairly and do my job.
    I have a girl that outweighs me by at least 20-30kgs/44-66 lbs and stands 2-3 inches taller who skates faster than me and has better stamina. And she can level any player on that track.
    Health at any size is really shown in this sport and is really empowering. Sure, I'm the fittest I have been in my whole life. I skate 2-3 times most weeks and do off skates strength and cardio related to my sport. It's hard. It hurts. We scream. I've pushed many times until I've vomited.

    I also hate bigger people, or anyone for that fact, body bashing on others who are different from them. Even before I started playing. Someone else's body size is not your business when it doesn't effect you. If you aren't partnered with them or are in a position to care for them if they become ill SHUT YOUR MOUTH.
    Body bashing just tells me that you are insecure about the way YOU feel and need to draw attention away. Just like any other bully. I am personally scared for those who are clearly ill or ones who are doing themselves potential harm from their habits and behaviours. It doesn't however give me the right to call them disgusting, sick or gross.

    I want the people who feel it is their given right to 'call others out' when they lose the weight how they would have felt at their lowest point if someone close or even a stranger called them those names. How helpful it would have been. To say that you think that is your right and one of your goals makes me sick. Way to be positive and helpful.
  • Lyssa62
    Lyssa62 Posts: 930 Member
    Well, actually, it is a size now. Just because it wasn't a size when you were growing up doesn't mean it's imaginary now. So they changed the way they size clothes. It's done and now 00 is a size. And there are real, live people who wear that size.

    and we can agree to disagree.. I don't think 00 is a size. I believe it's like one of the other posters says..it's a vanity issue and somebody with a tag gun is raking in on it.
  • Lyssa62
    Lyssa62 Posts: 930 Member
    I love this site..but it's just like any other forum somebody takes something somebody says and turns it into something it's not. "I" stated "I" do not think 00 is a size. Don't be telling me how I"m bashing people that wear it. I will never agree that it is a size and have 2 double zero friends and tell them on a DAILY basis..that 00 is not a size and our banter is way more fun than arguing with people on here about it.

    and now I read that there are double zero people offended that they are 00 and want a - in front of their number so they can be smaller than they already are. For goddess sake let's just take it to s m l xl and so on so forth..get rid of the stupid numbers.


    http://voices.yahoo.com/double-zero-pants-outlawed-5115177.html
    PS> and another reason I LOVE Tyra!!
  • Lovelyladydawn
    Lovelyladydawn Posts: 41 Member
    .
  • Lovelyladydawn
    Lovelyladydawn Posts: 41 Member
    .
  • Lovelyladydawn
    Lovelyladydawn Posts: 41 Member
    Again, just so I address it, when I wrote "skinny minnies" it wasn't meant in a negative way. Geesh people since when did Skinny Minny become derogatory and offensive? lol Really?? Should have just said "skinny people."
  • Lovelyladydawn
    Lovelyladydawn Posts: 41 Member
    .
  • Lovelyladydawn
    Lovelyladydawn Posts: 41 Member
    Why is it so easy for plus sized people to offend "skinny minnies"? It's like it's okay for you to criticize thin people but, no one should dare ever say anything derogatory about plus sized people.

    I find that troubling.

    I didn't find "skinny-minnies" offensive. Try not to think so negative dear. My friends and I have cutesie nick names for one another and "skinny minny" happens to be one that she gave herself...
  • Lovelyladydawn
    Lovelyladydawn Posts: 41 Member
    When I was plus-sized I stole quite a few men from the skinny girls! LOL But seriously, I have always had a great self-esteem at every size. I wasn't miserable, I wasn't ostracized or mistreated. I had a great social life, still wore beautiful clothes and kept myself look great, as well as feeling great. I never let my size be a factor for anything. I had health issues w/ my weight and I wanted to have a wider variety of fashion options which drove me to lose weight, but I was never a miserable heavy person.


    lol...I'm with you on that...I'm getting skinny for Chanel....lol JUST KIDDING...I do realize fashion is at times better in many walk-in stores when petite, however I always keep it on point..I have alot of confidence, I just hate when I see larger women miserable..I know it's a matter of their experience and their thoughts but, I'd like to motivate others, which is why I posted this...Just because you are large you can still rock a cute heal and outfit, hold your head high and own it...
  • Lovelyladydawn
    Lovelyladydawn Posts: 41 Member
    i was so much more miserable when i starved myself into a size 8-10 when i was 14 years old, now that i'm a size 16, i'm much happier within myself and i love my curves! :D go plus size! woo!

    You go girl!! I'm happy you overcame it and are doing good!! :)

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