Does This Make Me a Bad MFPer?

MonkRocker

I have people on my FL, but I have never posted or commented in order to motivate them. I comment on general chit-chat or funny things, but not exercise logs or goals met or anything.

I guess I don't do it because that kind of motivation doesn't work on me. Not that it's not appreciated, but if I can't motivate myself, no amount of virtual strangers on the internet is going to get me moving.

This also means I'm mildly perplexed when someone new posts a "need friends and motivation" thread. I guess it seems odd since they already got far enough to get a MFP account and presumably start tracking what they eat and making other life changes. Is the validation of strangers on the internet the thing that really motivates them to get up and start moving?

Is it just me?

corn63

Horrible. Be gone from my sight.

DarthCeltic

I have people on my FL, but I have never posted or commented in order to motivate them. I comment on general chit-chat or funny things, but not exercise logs or goals met or anything.

I guess I don't do it because that kind of motivation doesn't work on me. Not that it's not appreciated, but if I can't motivate myself, no amount of virtual strangers on the internet is going to get me moving.

This also means I'm mildly perplexed when someone new posts a "need friends and motivation" thread. I guess it seems odd since they already got far enough to get a MFP account and presumably start tracking what they eat and making other life changes. Is the validation of strangers on the internet the thing that really motivates them to get up and start moving?

Is it just me?

only if you would spit on them if you saw them in real life would you be a bad friend on MFP..

then again.. some deserve it..

taylor5877

I have about 20 friends, and I regularly comment to about a handful of my friends. One of my friends is fairly close to my height and weight, and we have had similar years and stories for weight loss/fitness.

At first I was a little, uh, I don't really know what to say to you guys, but now I interact a little each day.

I've totally become that annoying "facebook status updater" type person though

_Elemenopee_

I'm pretty much the same way...I'm not a motivator. It's written in the fine print on my wall though. C'est La Vie!

auroranflash

We are all differen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! do what works for u!!!!!!!!!

DarthCeltic

We are all differen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! do what works for u!!!!!!!!!

i looked so good there.. i hate i put on weight..

Miss_Chievous_wechange

Who cares, you're cute. :flowerforyou:

Sharyn913

I never comment on food logs.

Spartan_Maker

I like being invested in my MFP friends by knowing their individual goals and personalities. They seem to appreciate it. Quite honestly, I get as much out of it as they do. Plus, it allows for a good exchange of information and leads to interesting friendships.

ekz13

nope, it doesn't.... different things motivate different people.. some like to read, and some people do enough talking for everyone

MsTanya77

I personally don't need tons of motivation from others either, I have always been a self-starter, but you must be sensitive to the needs of others. I support my friends on their workouts, NSV's etc, even if I personally don't require the same motivation. We can't expect everyone to be like ourselves. Everyone is in a different place in their journey emotionally and some people need a push to keep going. I do think some people are overly needy and are just crying for attention, but others genuinely need someone to show that they care as they prob don't have any real support in their daily lives.

MissyMissy18

Nope it's not just you! I'm terrible at commenting on exercise logs and what not, but that's just because that stuff doesn't motivate me either! I'm far more motivated when my MFP friends take a little time to get to know me a bit.. I feel more accountable towards folks I've had a conversation with than folks who post the arbritary "well done" 's and nothing more.

kylejh

I try to comment on cardio activity (if it's legit - you'd never see me saying "way to go!" if someone posts they mowed the lawn or cleaned their house), and on weight loss, but never on the end of the day post. The idea of MFP is to be under your calorie goal, so I don't think people need to comment on that.

girlnamedlee

I'm an antisocial MFP'er. I had friends but I had to drop them because seeing what they ate, lost & exercised was making me overly critical of myself. Some might say just don't look but I'm way too much of a voyeur for that.

mcginger1

This site seems to take all kinds. Quiet types just looking to lose weight, attention *kitten* battling daily for validation in the "hottest" threads, and then people like me... observing these behaviors, appreciating the eye candy when it pops up, and thanking those who come up with truly creative things to make me laugh.

Game on.

marthathebear

I never comment on food logs either but it helps me to talk to others about similar problems. To each his own though. I personally need all the help I can get.

ZugTheMegasaurus

Unless I have something relevant and interesting or unique to say, I keep quiet. That's not just on MFP though, that's just how I operate in life generally. For some reason, it bothers people more than I'd expect.

divinebird

I think it's about accountability. Being accountable to strangers you've never met and will likely never meet in person, you get the feeling of needing to move your rear but without the guilt associated with someone you know well. I love the little "you go girl" comments, personally. Every encouragement--no matter the source--is welcome.

bleacheblonde

I guess I am on MFP the way I am in real life...if I'm not motivated intrinsically, then extrinsic motivation won't do a whole lot of good. Encouragement is nice, but ultimately I have to help myself. I think sometimes the fact that I don't really comment on other people's stuff very often might make me seem aloof, but the fact of the matter is that I don't have a whole lot of time to do much besides log my own shizz and occasionally hit the forums. I read other people's updates and sometimes I'll comment, but not very often. I guess perhaps that might be taken as antisocial....if so, I'm sorry, it's not that I don't care! :ohwell:

SusanLovesToEat

I thought that I didn't need the motivation or advice but have found it to be invaluable-especially when **** happens (and it always does) and you find your motivation start to flag.

Really supportive MFP "friends" check up on you and make you feel that your journey and success is as important to them as it is to you.

bleacheblonde

Unless I have something relevant and interesting or unique to say, I keep quiet. That's not just on MFP though, that's just how I operate in life generally. For some reason, it bothers people more than I'd expect.

^^ Me too! I'm not one to speak just for the sake of speaking. I'm a quiet person in general. I'm a thinker, not a talker

Asil02

Well I am a "Chatty Cathy" with my MFP friends. May border on annoying (though I hope not). I enjoy trying to give them an encouraging word or two. Like others I don't usually comment on food diaries....unless it looks like a totally delicious day! ;o)

zestyzaftig

I'm one of those bleeding heart weirdos that doesn't want or need to receive support, but I love to give it.

auntiebabs

Personally, this is something I've got to do for me.

I like the message boards to learn new ideas and approaches. Or even to validate some of my existing philosophies.
I spout off a lot, but I find commenting helps me clarify my thoughts and helps me work out new strategies.

I don't get the whole accountability thing some people have either.
I saw one thread where the OP was furious that people didn't have their diary public.
Accountability may work for her, but
Other people telling me I'm bad and wrong is really the express route to me giving up.
Other people over praising gives me a false sense of success, and I think I don't have to try as hard.
I really need to find my own equilibrium, keep my own council.

I've been a big fan of baby steps. I'm not perfect, but I'm doing better and if I can keep doing a little better. And remember to balance food with life, not get too obsessed with restricting or indulging, hopefully I can get a little closer to happy.

Darkskinned88

i'm the same way, at most i'll toss a "nice" but something about motivating here seems so..(cant think of a word that won't offend) i appreciate friends nice comments and congrats but to say they are motivating me is another story...im a terrible MFPer

cuarrech

Nope it's not just you! I'm terrible at commenting on exercise logs and what not, but that's just because that stuff doesn't motivate me either! I'm far more motivated when my MFP friends take a little time to get to know me a bit.. I feel more accountable towards folks I've had a conversation with than folks who post the arbritary "well done" 's and nothing more.

^^ Me, too.

taunto

Like others mentioned, its all different for others. For me, this site being a fitness site is a priority above all. The folks who're here just for chit-chat got no place in my FL. I like them and do communicate with them but only on forums. On my FL and my newsfeed, I need/give support in terms of fitness. I do make statuses that are not fitness related but if you're not commenting on my workouts/food diary then I cannot keep you in my FL and have to make room for folks who give/need support since I have limited time. I have a bunch of folks I communicate only via forums but my FL need sto stay small

MonkRocker

Horrible. Be gone from my sight.

I see someone has Haterade(tm) on their food log today. :bigsmile:

Who cares, you're cute. :flowerforyou:

Oh behave.


Yeah, I guess I just can't imagine that someone's about to blow off a workout then thinks "wait! a bunch of internet strangers won't say 'atta boy!' if I skip this workout! Guess I better hit the gym!"

I don't think it makes any of us antisocial.

heretic911

I like being invested in my MFP friends by knowing their individual goals and personalities. They seem to appreciate it. Quite honestly, I get as much out of it as they do. Plus, it allows for a good exchange of information and leads to interesting friendships.

I agree 100%.

thatbitchychick

I don't think it's the validation of strangers that makes people want MFP friends. I think it's the possible humiliation of strangers seeing your food journal (which would probably keep me from eating chips) that makes people want MFP friends. Notice I have no friends, LOL!