The things people say to bigger people...

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HannahK08
HannahK08 Posts: 35 Member
in Chit-Chat
When friend/family say "Oh you're beautiful.. You dont really need to lose weight." or "You're so smart and pretty that it doesnt matter what you weigh..its whats on the inside that counts"


I HATE IT!!!!! Instead of telling me that Id rather hear someone YELL AT ME TO GET OFF MY FAT A** AND EXERCISE.
Maybe its just me lol

thoughts?
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Replies

  • TropicalFlowerz
    TropicalFlowerz Posts: 1,990 Member
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    #1 thing i've always heard.......but you've got such a pretty face,,,(akward pause),whatever!!
  • sagetracey
    sagetracey Posts: 607 Member
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    Before you know it they will be telling you not to lose any more weight, even though you haven't reached your goal.

    I managed to silence once cousin by replying that I would stop when I was as slim as she was ( we are similar in height).
  • Laura_Suzie
    Laura_Suzie Posts: 1,288 Member
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    Ugh, I have family on total opposite sides of the spectrum. My grandmother says, "You don't need to lose weight, I don't want you to get too skinny." Then, my mom and sister goes, "You need to lose weight!", "Should you really be eating that?", etc.

    I personally hate both. I know what's best for me. I know when I've gained weight and I know what weight I would like to get down to. I don't need extra input.

    Don't even get me started about directors who tell you that you need to lose weight... :noway: It always starts with, "There is a certain look you need to have as an actress..." and it always ends with, "I'm not saying that's the reason why you didn't get the part." YEAH RIGHT. Then why the hell did you even bring it up?
  • RubyRubixcube
    RubyRubixcube Posts: 258 Member
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    #1 thing i've always heard.......but you've got such a pretty face,,,(akward pause),whatever!!

    I dont know you, so I dont care if I hurt your feelings...

    but you ARE very pretty :)
  • JaseyMakesHerMove
    JaseyMakesHerMove Posts: 37
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    Oh no, in my immediate family it's the opposite. My dad's an exercise nut that was always picking on me when I was younger to work on my weight but it didn't make me want to work. Just made me feel crappy. Mom has weight problems too and she has always been supportive, not always perfect but she's good about accommodating it all.

    My friends sort of walk on eggshells around it. They never tell me what to do one way or another. But when I need encouragement I have a few gals who are around for me. <3
    Rarely does anyone say I'm pretty, and don't need to lose weight. If they did I would just say "Thank you, but I just want to be healthy for myself." :) I'm sure they have good intentions, just need to be set straight.
  • seehe
    seehe Posts: 946 Member
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    Personally, I would rather not have people give me their opinions that I have a pretty face or that I need to get off my bum and exercise unless I ask them for their opinion!
  • apocalypsepwnie
    apocalypsepwnie Posts: 373
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    URG!
    YES!
    'Shame, she's so pretty!' fffff so it's not ok that I have a nice face when I've got a big bum? Is that reserved only for thin people? Am I stealing something?

    My mum is bloody strange. She tut tuts about my weight and tells me things like 'I am worried you are going to die' jeez ma! I'm not that big! And then when I lose weight she is concerned I'm on drugs or starving myself and trying to make me eat more.
    She does have consistancies, she treats me like a gastronomical alien most of the time by questioning what I can and can't eat and making judgement and she becomes the bloody expert on everything. Like telling me I shouldn't eat meat and veg together in one meal or that my first mouthful should be carbs... BAH piss off! She comes up with crazy things to justify her own diet too lol. And makes me feel bad that she still fits a pair of jeans I had when I was 14. Dude, I've always been fat and I just got fatter so it's not like it's an acheivement.
  • MissCierra2008
    MissCierra2008 Posts: 36
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    My personal favorite: When is your baby due?!? I'm like ....... -____-
  • pain_is_weakness
    pain_is_weakness Posts: 798 Member
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    Your face is so pretty


    you have such "womanly curves" ok yes I am fat in all the right places? whatever


    you are short, short people can't pull it off as well as others . . .erk pisses me off!


    or when people give you the most basic dieting advice 'watch what you eat, it's about portions, drink water, exercise more. Like duh I told you I am losing weight, chances are i am doing most of that already diptard
  • SurfinBird1981
    SurfinBird1981 Posts: 517 Member
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    You will make yourself ill :/
  • Stephanie_Autry
    Stephanie_Autry Posts: 228 Member
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    My personal favorite: When is your baby due?!? I'm like ....... -____-

    OMG! Before I started losing weight someone said this to me- I was in shock...!
  • Raina27
    Raina27 Posts: 133
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    #1 thing i've always heard.......but you've got such a pretty face,,,(akward pause),whatever!!

    Yup! That's all I ever heard!! :ohwell:
  • Keiko385
    Keiko385 Posts: 514 Member
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    I know they mean well but I hate to hear "You carry your weight differently, you dont look like you weigh that much " ...yea the fat is evenly distributed :grumble:
  • hapoo100
    hapoo100 Posts: 940 Member
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    "hey big guy" I would cringe because i knew it wasnt the muscles.
  • Witchmoo
    Witchmoo Posts: 261 Member
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    I've had 'you'd be quite pretty if you weren't so fat'.......that was a corker!!!
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
    LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo Posts: 3,634 Member
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    When friend/family say "Oh you're beautiful.. You dont really need to lose weight." or "You're so smart and pretty that it doesnt matter what you weigh..its whats on the inside that counts"


    I HATE IT!!!!! Instead of telling me that Id rather hear someone YELL AT ME TO GET OFF MY FAT A** AND EXERCISE.
    Maybe its just me lol

    thoughts?
    Mine was the exact opposite. "You have a pretty face but your sister is more beautiful but you could be more attractive if only you lose weight". Ugh I hate that :grumble:
  • TNFirefly
    TNFirefly Posts: 169 Member
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    What I don't get is why parents don't control their kids in public. It is bad enough when people stare, or turn to look at my butt as I pass to see how big it is and giggle. But kids who come and poke my butt and run and laugh? And the mom just laughs and looks away? Seriously? It doesn't matter that I am losing, or that I have logged 5 hours in the gym this week, or that I am desperately trying to make healthy choices for just about the first time in my life. This is what happens when I go to the grocery store. Never fails. Even with a cart loaded with veggies and fruit and they may have donuts and frozen pizza. It still kills me that people tend to no longer consider me to be human. Most of the time they act like I deserve it, and I do see their point. I ate the food, it wasn't forced. I have had a lot of issues that lead to the overeating, yes. I was weak. But now that I am making so many changes, why do you still let your kids abuse me in public and never say a word?
  • saragato
    saragato Posts: 1,154
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    Some people really mean well when they say things like that, but their good intentions kinda turn into sour grapes, so to speak. There are times you don't want the supposedly faux-encouragement to stay the same based on other good qualities. I was always told my personality outshone my weight, but when it came down to it I was known as "the funny fat girl."

    Someone mentioned the "you have such a pretty face" comment. I think everyone hates hearing that because not only is it implying nothing else is pretty about you but also that the rest of the sentence should be, "but you'd be prettier if you weren't fat."

    I had a friend tell me in the 7th grade the only reason I had breasts was because I was fat. Then again he was an idiot and even into adulthood he managed to act like your average junior high kid trolling the internet.

    I've also had people move away from the face comment and comment on my hair instead. Basically they focus on the neck up unless I happen to be wearing a rather weird/amusing shirt. I find it a big unnerving especially if I've made an effort to look nice.
  • mirandamayhem
    mirandamayhem Posts: 772
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    When I was 20 and doing youth work, a rather lovely young boy told me "You should be carrying a road sign with you, to warn of "Wide Load""
  • Illona88
    Illona88 Posts: 903 Member
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    My parents are actively trying to make me eat unhealthy crap, because they don't think I should be losing weight.

    Always saying that I should have some chips or have some candy. I don't need to lose weight. Losing weight isn't good for you, blah blah.

    I am trying to eat well and do some exercise, because I am actually 40 pounds overweight and I want to be healthy and be able to do stuff without getting tired all the time.

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