When is it okay to leave your newborn?

corn63

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/abc-blogs/ok-parent-leave-newborn-124022433--abc-news-parenting.html


Jist of the story: Mom goes on vacation. Leaves her 10 week old with her fiance's mom and a nanny. Now people are calling her selfish and that she wasn't ready to be a parent if she needed to get away from her child after only 10 weeks.


So what about you? I personally don't have kids, but I'm interested to hear the responses as I see nothing wrong with it. As stated in the article, a happy mommy makes a happy child.

rml_16

I see nothing wrong with it, either. But the modern mentality is that once you squirt a person out of you, you're supposed to stop having a life of your own.

DarthCeltic

umm.. 6 weeks in america is norm..

period..

amazing this lady gets this.. but what about the new ceo for yahoo.. which is gonna work through her 6 weeks at home..

Ruthe8

Whoa, I think those people need to worry about their own lives. If she was comfortable leaving the child in their care then what's the problem?

Huskeryogi

I think people need to live and let live. She arranged for absolutely qualified care givers. Why is it anyone else's business?

rml_16

I think people need to live and let live. She arranged for absolutely qualified care givers. Why is it anyone else's business?

Exactly. It's not like she left the kid with her crack dealer.

And why isn't anyone upset with her husband, who also left the baby?

beernpizza

We left our daughter with my mother and mother in law when she was 3 months old to go on a vacation. We missed her a lot, but didn't feel bad or selfish. We needed husband and wife time.

Yanicka1

Good for her.

DarthCeltic

I think people need to live and let live. She arranged for absolutely qualified care givers. Why is it anyone else's business?

Exactly. It's not like she left the kid with her crack dealer.

And why isn't anyone upset with her husband, who also left the baby?

ummm because the political landscape of this country wants to go back to the 1950s..

i blame mad men..

PBsMommy

Wow! Live and let live.

She had someone she knew watch her baby. It's not like she left the baby with a AIDS infested crackwhore at the Kangaroo.

As a mother of a 5 month old, those first few weeks are TOUGH. I don't blame her one bit for taking a break. My mom actually kept my daughter overnight when she was about 12ish weeks old so me and the hubby could get a break and have some us time.... Best 12 hours ever. :laugh:

rml_16

I think people need to live and let live. She arranged for absolutely qualified care givers. Why is it anyone else's business?

Exactly. It's not like she left the kid with her crack dealer.

And why isn't anyone upset with her husband, who also left the baby?

ummm because the political landscape of this country wants to go back to the 1950s..

i blame mad men..

Leave Mad Men out of this! *shakes fist*

That show is awesome.

Honestly, though, people criticized me for taking my daughter to the mall when she was 10 days old. Because of course she was going to catch ebola from all the ebola germs in the mall.

TheDrBuchanan

When many women have to return to their full-time jobs at 5-6 weeks post partum, why is it such a bad idea to get a little R&R after 10 weeks? At that point mom is likely getting little-to-no sleep as well. I was eternally grateful for my parents and in-laws any time they wanted to help us recharge. It definitely goes a long way towards feeling human, confident, and more patient. Shame on our society for condemning this mom (and, as someone else mentioned, NOT her husband).

VelociMama

I'm pregnant with my first now, and I will, unfortunately, have to work from home after my child is born just to keep up with my workload. A lot of women have to do this nowadays or risk losing their jobs.

As long as she left the child with an appropriate caregiver, I don't see the problem.

Fatal1ty2k5

I think people need to live and let live. She arranged for absolutely qualified care givers. Why is it anyone else's business?

Exactly. It's not like she left the kid with her crack dealer.

And why isn't anyone upset with her husband, who also left the baby?

ummm because the political landscape of this country wants to go back to the 1950s..

i blame mad men..

Don't go bringing mad men into this lol

BondBomb

I see both sides of it. She chose what looks like responsible caregivers. Its her child and if he is stressed by her leaving then that's a burden she has to bear. But at 10 weeks postpartum I was practically a crazy person with no sleep and the stress of interviewing nanny's for my return to work.
I personally could not have done it. Being away from my son for work is awful now and he is 2. But it would have been torture when he was a newborn. I even missed him when he was asleep and I was awake. And I do believe a 10 week old would miss her terribly so it makes me sad for him.

ilovemybuggy

It's not anyones business what this lady did. Personally, I had a c-section- and I went back to work after 8 weeks. Everyone is different- some choose to stay longer, some go back when they're allowed- and some have no choice. I had no choice but to go back to work- I had to do what I needed to keep a roof over my sons head and food in his belly, and diapers and clothes on his butt. Live and let live, definitely!

DarthCeltic

I think people need to live and let live. She arranged for absolutely qualified care givers. Why is it anyone else's business?

Exactly. It's not like she left the kid with her crack dealer.

And why isn't anyone upset with her husband, who also left the baby?

ummm because the political landscape of this country wants to go back to the 1950s..

i blame mad men..

Leave Mad Men out of this! *shakes fist*

That show is awesome.

Honestly, though, people criticized me for taking my daughter to the mall when she was 10 days old. Because of course she was going to catch ebola from all the ebola germs in the mall.

i mean no disrespect to the show.. i mean some people believe everything they see on tv.. (oh look.. its a 50s show.. wow women in the kitchen.. i want me sum o that!)

i think its terrible to be honest..

corn63

You're all horrible mothers and I demand you turn your children over to CPS.

Turtlehurdle

Newborn? No.

PBsMommy

I think people need to live and let live. She arranged for absolutely qualified care givers. Why is it anyone else's business?

Exactly. It's not like she left the kid with her crack dealer.

And why isn't anyone upset with her husband, who also left the baby?

ummm because the political landscape of this country wants to go back to the 1950s..

i blame mad men..

Leave Mad Men out of this! *shakes fist*

That show is awesome.

Honestly, though, people criticized me for taking my daughter to the mall when she was 10 days old. Because of course she was going to catch ebola from all the ebola germs in the mall.

Yeah, I had a few distant family memebers that had their jaw drop when they found out we took ours to Target when she was a little over a week. :noway:

I guess we need to put these babies in disenfected bubble wrap and keep them at attached to our hips 24/7.:huh:

rml_16

I think people need to live and let live. She arranged for absolutely qualified care givers. Why is it anyone else's business?

Exactly. It's not like she left the kid with her crack dealer.

And why isn't anyone upset with her husband, who also left the baby?

ummm because the political landscape of this country wants to go back to the 1950s..

i blame mad men..

Leave Mad Men out of this! *shakes fist*

That show is awesome.

Honestly, though, people criticized me for taking my daughter to the mall when she was 10 days old. Because of course she was going to catch ebola from all the ebola germs in the mall.

i mean no disrespect to the show.. i mean some people believe everything they see on tv.. (oh look.. its a 50s show.. wow women in the kitchen.. i want me sum o that!)

i think its terrible to be honest..

:-)

Yeah, I gotcha. I just think the writing and the character development are beyond incredible. If it was a book, it would become a classic, easy. It's just that good.

To be honest, I wouldn't mind not having to go to work. I would have a problem with all the sleeping around, though.

rml_16

I think people need to live and let live. She arranged for absolutely qualified care givers. Why is it anyone else's business?

Exactly. It's not like she left the kid with her crack dealer.

And why isn't anyone upset with her husband, who also left the baby?

ummm because the political landscape of this country wants to go back to the 1950s..

i blame mad men..

Leave Mad Men out of this! *shakes fist*

That show is awesome.

Honestly, though, people criticized me for taking my daughter to the mall when she was 10 days old. Because of course she was going to catch ebola from all the ebola germs in the mall.

Yeah, I had a few distant family memebers that had their jaw drop when they found out we took ours to Target when she was a little over a week. :noway:

I guess we need to put these babies in disenfected bubble wrap and keep them at attached to our hips 24/7.:huh:

Obviously. We must be flogged.

I would have taken her out sooner, but I wasn't up to it. And she didn't even get a cold the entire first year of her life.

Corn -- Mine turns 18 in a month. CPS can't touch me now!

DarthCeltic

i think that people should watch a nurse give a newborn their first bath... its not delicate.. its somewhat rough and then think about what happens to a newborn boy at 7 days old.. then think about where the baby is born.. HOSPITAL.. where the sick people go..

I think the public out of brand new babies is just fine.. did i say go to africa and expose to ebola? no..

AJ_Pete

Sometimes, mama needs a break.
Dealing with a newborn is exhausting... and it's their business. I have friends who go without their kids... and given the chance and having the proper care for my kiddos, I'd jump at the chance at a short adult vacation. She was probably refreshed and even more attentive to her baby after she came back from vacation. People need to stop being so judgmental.

Il_DaniD_lI

I left my daughter overnight for the first time when she was 6 weeks old. I left her with her Grandmother, who I trust. After that one night of me going crazy worrying about her I waited until she was about 6 months. I still only leave her with her Grandmother and don't trust anyone else enough to watch her (shes almost 5).

I don't think it was selfish of her to go on vacation when she had a 10 week old, although I can't imagine ever being able to actually enjoy a vacation knowing I was not with my baby.

harleydall76

I'm not a parent, so I can't say I know the felling, but here is my 2 cents.

First, how long was she gone? I read it quickly and it doesn't say, just the he runs a tournament every summer. But didn't say how long she went for.

If it was a week, or even 10 days, I'd say let her be.

But if it was for the entire summer, then I would say she doesn't deserve that baby.

I realize for me, when I hear parents complain about their kids or saying they need to get away from them, it bothers me because I never got that far and I think people shouldn't take for granted what a blessing they were given. But again, a simple week or so vacation isn't that bad IMO.

auroranflash

Let's all find new fun ways to judge each other instead of making the best out of our own lives!

SoDamnHungry

Wow, people are really judgmental. After carrying a kid for 9 months and then getting no sleep for ten weeks, I'd want a break, too. Not to mention that many woman often suffer from postpartum depression and sometimes just getting away from it helps.

Of course, if she was gone for a really long time, then why the hell did she have a kid?

corn63

According to the article, she was gone 6 days.

Ruthe8

I'm not a parent, so I can't say I know the felling, but here is my 2 cents.

First, how long was she gone? I read it quickly and it doesn't say, just the he runs a tournament every summer. But didn't say how long she went for.

If it was a week, or even 10 days, I'd say let her be.

But if it was for the entire summer, then I would say she doesn't deserve that baby.

I realize for me, when I hear parents complain about their kids or saying they need to get away from them, it bothers me because I never got that far and I think people shouldn't take for granted what a blessing they were given. But again, a simple week or so vacation isn't that bad IMO.

You know what? I don't think it's up to you to decide who "deserves" their own baby.

rml_16

I'm not a parent, so I can't say I know the felling, but here is my 2 cents.

First, how long was she gone? I read it quickly and it doesn't say, just the he runs a tournament every summer. But didn't say how long she went for.

If it was a week, or even 10 days, I'd say let her be.

But if it was for the entire summer, then I would say she doesn't deserve that baby.

I realize for me, when I hear parents complain about their kids or saying they need to get away from them, it bothers me because I never got that far and I think people shouldn't take for granted what a blessing they were given. But again, a simple week or so vacation isn't that bad IMO.

I don't know of any golf tournament that lasts more and a few days -- maybe a week.

And, really, being a caregiver 24/7 to a baby who can't communicate, who cries for no reason you can figure out, losing sleep -- it's exhausting and sometimes the best thing you can do for your child is to take a break and come back refreshed.