Relationship question

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tri10806
tri10806 Posts: 192 Member
in Chit-Chat
Anyone ever ended a relationship because the other person just didn't get your fitness obsession and/or gave you crap about how much time you spend working out or your focus on eating right?
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  • Lone_Wolf70
    Lone_Wolf70 Posts: 2,820 Member
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    so what you are asking is if it is ok to break up with your woman because you got in shape and she is still all gnarly?
  • tri10806
    tri10806 Posts: 192 Member
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    so what you are asking is if it is ok to break up with your woman because you got in shape and she is still all gnarly?
    Not a bad guess. :laugh:

    No, just seemed to be a lot of relationship threads popping up. Thought I'd throw that one out there! I've found that it's really hard to date someone that just don't get it.
  • heyitsadam
    heyitsadam Posts: 70 Member
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    Yes... and that's why Little Debbie and I stopped seeing each other.......




    .......total *kitten*, by the way.
  • MiCool90
    MiCool90 Posts: 460 Member
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    Yes... and that's why Little Debbie and I stopped seeing each other.......




    .......total *kitten*, by the way.

    great line haha
  • olee67
    olee67 Posts: 208 Member
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    Yep. Most of us have chosen a lifestyle. Having someone in your life that "doesn't get it" or even resents it doesn't fit. Would you maintain a relationship with a drug addict if you weren't one?
  • stillthesamegirl
    stillthesamegirl Posts: 112 Member
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    I think this is more an issue of you both having a different focus right now. I wouldn't break off the relationship before trying to work through it or maybe trying to get them involved in your fitness goals. But I don't think this reason alone is enough to call off a relationship. I think it's a surface issue of something deeper.
  • supertracylynn
    supertracylynn Posts: 1,338 Member
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    Let's not forget to mention the resentment they have for you because you're strong and fit... yet they keep complaining about the same 20# they're gaining/losing.
  • StarIsMoving
    StarIsMoving Posts: 437
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    Ok... going to take a stab it this one and attempt to keep it politically correct (yes, it's good to try something new everyday, lol).
    So in life people grow - that's fact
    Longevity of a relationship is basically how much do you grow together as well as separately. Sometimes the separately goes at a more rapid pace leaving one behind.
    That being said... it sounds like you have grown a bit faster (or shrank, got more fit, lol).
    Is it ok? I have seen people break up over less.
    Is it "right"... if you no longer seem to have a commonality thread of a major component in your life... fix it.
    *on a side note... can you tell I was just giving one of my kids the "if you don't like something, then fix it, don't bi7ch" talk?? LOL!*
  • Tristalee08
    Tristalee08 Posts: 10 Member
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    Totally loved this. So true.
  • conservativek
    conservativek Posts: 74 Member
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    Seems like a relationship that's held together by true love would evoke enough self sacrifice- from both people involved- to allow for differences like this.
  • ashlinmarie
    ashlinmarie Posts: 1,263 Member
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    I guess it depends on how long you've been together. If she is resentful and b*tching and you aren't totally blowing her off for the gym all the time then she just might not be ready to take the commitment. If she's not into fitness, but supports you for the most part, then you need another reason to get rid of her.

    For us, I had trouble staying on track because my husband refused to get on board with my fitness. I figured if he was happy with me, I'd stay fat. But then he left for basic training and I knew he'd be getting fit and I wasn't able to keep up with him so I started working out and losing weight. Now that we're both on the same page, it is going a lot easier than last time because we have a common goal. I wouldn't leave him over it but this is much better.
  • trevpimp
    trevpimp Posts: 170 Member
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    Haa naa but I like a gurl that gets mad at my workouts. Ha
  • kmhenry84
    kmhenry84 Posts: 96 Member
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    It is hard enough to do this with someone on your side... when you are in a relationship with someone who is unsupportive or jealous of you, it just makes it that much harder.

    And if you're someone who doesn't have kids, but wants kids, it makes it hard if you want to raise your kids to be healthy and fit and to make good solid choices when your partner is not on board.

    Food for thought.
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
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    My last relationship walked out on me as he said these words

    "If you hadn't lost the weight we would still be together"

    after I picked my jaw up off the ground, I felt blessed and relieved that he beat me to the punch.

    But I've also decided that my next relationship has to be with someone that is on the same fitness crusade as I am...he doesn't have to be perfect, I'm not...but he has to be dedicated and active and have fitness goals...

    I think that's fair.
  • amberlongsine
    amberlongsine Posts: 215 Member
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    Is her health affecting yours?

    What about your fitness is she not understanding?

    How does she feel about your fitness journey?

    Why does it matter if shes NOT on your fitness level?

    Do you think maybe she just needs a little motivation to get on board?
  • erinliz
    erinliz Posts: 43 Member
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    I think the best relationships are the ones in which both individuals support the other's goals and those things which make them stronger, healthier and happier. My husband and I decided from the beginning that we would always encourage and support each other in all things that make us better as individuals and as a couple.
  • Everythin2Lose
    Everythin2Lose Posts: 110
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    My recent ex got jealous that I made working out and cooking healthy home-cooked meals a priority (finally got serious about this whole thing!) and he fought me with it the whole time ..... moaning about not spending time with him when I got home from work because I selfishly had chosen the gym and buying fast food at every opportunity.
    He wanted to be the "successful" one of the relationship haha If you're not on the same team and supportive of each others goals it is more than alright to end it! Walk away find someone who is willing to be there and help you to succeed (plus it makes everything more fun if there is some healthy competition ;) )!
  • mminor77
    mminor77 Posts: 313
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    Yes... and that's why Little Debbie and I stopped seeing each other.......




    .......total *kitten*, by the way.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :drinker:
  • avir8
    avir8 Posts: 671 Member
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    Anyone ever ended a relationship because the other person just didn't get your fitness obsession and/or gave you crap about how much time you spend working out or your focus on eating right?

    :flowerforyou:
    tumblr_lhag1tI07a1qeolcio1_500.gif
  • ihateroses
    ihateroses Posts: 893 Member
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    My last relationship went a little bit like this:

    Stage 1: I loved him with all my heart, his heart was not all in it, I was chubby he was fit. I was still very secure with my body but insecure with the relationship. He is a very confident guy.

    Stage 2: I lost weight, started working out a lot, focused on myself more. He started saying I love you more often and became more attentive, but would start obsessing with going out to eat and insisting we do something (like go to the movies) when he knows i have a workout planned or that I'm trying to watch what I eat. Started saying things like "I'm getting fat" about himself....kind of becoming a doormat....this turned me off a lot, especially since pointing out his flaws made him become less and less attractive to me.

    Stage 3: We broke up and he blamed my weight loss and newfound "shallowness".

    I honestly think that a healthy lifestyle is something a couple has to at least try to have in common or the resentment kicks in and the other person starts feeling either guilty or just blame everything on you....

    Me and my current boyfriend made a pact that we will always try to keep up with each other physically and not let ourselves go, and as "shallow" as that may be in a way its also motivating and nice to have the support.

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