starvation mode and losing friends

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  • AnneC77
    AnneC77 Posts: 284
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    Say goodbye to that "friend" and be happy you no longer have to deal with their judgement~

    I love this and agree 1000%
  • Alohathin
    Alohathin Posts: 360 Member
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    Well, you already know how I feel about the amount of calories you eat. My problem, however, is not that you eat less than 1200 a day, it's that you do this consistently while burning more calories in exercise than you consume.

    There are a lot of things about your weightloss plan that I am very supportive of. Your dedication thus far is fantastic, and I admire the amount of cardio you are putting in, despite also working a job.

    I know you have said you will reevaluate your calorie consumption after you have lost a certain amount of weight. I urge you not to make a permanent habit of eating fewer calories than you burn in exercise. Because you can do harm to your body if you do it for too long.
  • zeebruhgirl
    zeebruhgirl Posts: 493 Member
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    I've had people ***** at me for that too and it's just outrageous!

    I eat when I'm hungry, if I have a huge salad and the lettuce costs me 20 calories, and I have my 3 ounces of protein and I'm full, why should I keep eating?!

    I eat what makes me feel good, and everyone else can stuff it. haha
  • DonM46
    DonM46 Posts: 771 Member
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    Net 1199 calories and you're gonna die.
    Net 1201 calories and you'll live forever.
    Yeah, right.
  • BodyByButter
    BodyByButter Posts: 563 Member
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    I'll be really honest with you, and I don't mean for this to sound mean. I would be bothered by your cupcake picture more than anything. I struggle with trigger foods and don't watch Food Network anymore because it makes me crave things I don't eat. Seeing that icon in my feed all the time would keep cupcakes on my mind. For the same reason, I don't keep trigger foods in the house.

    Crazy?
  • HypersonicFitNess
    HypersonicFitNess Posts: 1,219 Member
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    I am thinking of un-friending some who are consistently eating less than 1200 calories per day and the reason is because it is unhealthy. Not because I said so but because that is the medical and scientific research. I did have an eating disorder and I can't and won't say "good job" or say nothing at all to someone that is consistently eating below the minimum calories they should be eating. That would be condoning anorexia or bulimia or other eating disorders. I want to be supportive to those wanting to lose weight but I can't support their decision to damage their body.

    BTW - yes you will lose some weight while doing this but you will start to lose lean muscle tissue and organ tissue. You won't notice the damage it's doing to your body right away, but it will happen and if it goes for to long, it might not be repairable damage.

    The other issue with doing a "diet" like this is that when you lose the amount of weight you desire and go back to eating a normal amount of calories, you will gain all of the lost weigh back plus additional weight because your body has now made changes to horde all calories and store any and all fats that you may consume. This will lead you to once again drop to the unnaturally low calories to drop those pounds; but this time you will find it harder to lose those pounds, so you'll drop to even fewer calories and increase your exercise even more; you will fall into a viscous cycle that will may or may not end....if it does it will not end with you in a healthy place or it may end with you in the hospital from cardiac arrest.

    I know this isn't what you want to hear...but PLEASE take it from someone who KNOWS first hand....don't do it!

    Lose weigh the healthy, sustainable way. You have to make a life changing commitment to your health; it's not a short term thing.

    And this is why I am still friends with people who are still eating below the minimum calories they should be eating...I will continue to hound them about it...it doesn't matter if they hide their diary from me. I'm a mom; hiding doesn't make it go away. I will continue encouraging them to eat the right way...they will have to unfriend me.
  • opuntia
    opuntia Posts: 860 Member
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    I'll be really honest with you, and I don't mean for this to sound mean. I would be bothered by your cupcake picture more than anything. I struggle with trigger foods and don't watch Food Network anymore because it makes me crave things I don't eat. Seeing that icon in my feed all the time would keep cupcakes on my mind. For the same reason, I don't keep trigger foods in the house.

    Crazy?

    As an aside, you can use adblock to block someone's userpic if it is bothering you. I do this all the time on sites where people use animated userpics because a lot of them make me dizzy and give me headaches.
  • geebusuk
    geebusuk Posts: 3,348 Member
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    Is there conclusive evidence to show that for EVERYONE eating under 1200 calories per day is unhealthy?
    For many it is, I have no doubt. But I suspect for some they can maintain a perfectly healthy living from that.
    Of course they may not be the ones actually doing it, but that's another matter!
  • Kikilicious84
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    Am I the only one here that's too busy to stalk my friend's diary? Lol

    Sorry you lost a friend OP...that's just how people are around here.

    Good luck on your journey!
  • Alohathin
    Alohathin Posts: 360 Member
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    Is there conclusive evidence to show that for EVERYONE eating under 1200 calories per day is unhealthy?
    For many it is, I have no doubt. But I suspect for some they can maintain a perfectly healthy living from that.
    Of course they may not be the ones actually doing it, but that's another matter!

    There is conclusive evidence to show that EVERYONE who consistently eats fewer calories than they burn exercising is unhealthy.
  • Kikilicious84
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    I'll be really honest with you, and I don't mean for this to sound mean. I would be bothered by your cupcake picture more than anything. I struggle with trigger foods and don't watch Food Network anymore because it makes me crave things I don't eat. Seeing that icon in my feed all the time would keep cupcakes on my mind. For the same reason, I don't keep trigger foods in the house.

    Crazy?

    THIS! Lol this is why I don't stalk diaries...I don't want to think "oohhh that sounds good"
  • Kikilicious84
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    Is there conclusive evidence to show that for EVERYONE eating under 1200 calories per day is unhealthy?
    For many it is, I have no doubt. But I suspect for some they can maintain a perfectly healthy living from that.
    Of course they may not be the ones actually doing it, but that's another matter!

    There is conclusive evidence to show that EVERYONE who consistently eats fewer calories than they burn exercising is unhealthy.

    True...but that number differs between individuals.

    I suggest the OP get her BMR measured to find out where she needs to be.
  • sassi5
    sassi5 Posts: 49
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    YOU CAN FRIEND ME! You are fine and treating your body well. It would take over 3 months of eating about 500 calories a day to make your body go into starvation mode. As long as you are getting all your nutrients and have energy you are fine. Going under your calories a couple of times a week will not hurt you nor is it a bad thing. Good luck!
  • Kikilicious84
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    I deleted someone for their ultra low calorie intake, but I am talking less than 600 cals a day. I felt I got nothing from them. To each their own. I wouldn`t worry about it if it was me.

    I wonder if they were logging everything...hmm
  • Schmelvie
    Schmelvie Posts: 233 Member
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    Sounds pretty petty to me, but unless you really knew this person on a personal basis, then they weren't really your "friend", so it's no great loss. However, I do understand your point of view that it hurts a little.

    Feel free to add me as a friend if you'd like. I need more MFP friends, and I won't judge you. I opened my diary up for public consumption, mostly because I don't care what other people think. I'm the one that knows my body, sees my results, understands what I can maintain, built a plan for myself, and will live with any consequences (good or bad).

    And I understand what you mean about eating clean. The cleaner I eat, the harder it is to get a full day of calories because I'm full all the time just from the sheer volume of food.
  • geebusuk
    geebusuk Posts: 3,348 Member
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    There is conclusive evidence to show that EVERYONE who consistently eats fewer calories than they burn exercising is unhealthy.
    Which of course isn't always the same as eating under 1200 calories.

    And we need a better definition of 'consistently' - is it for a few days, weeks, months, years? Have you got any links to said evidence to hand out of interest?
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    I personally, remove people who consistently eat below 1200 calories.
    I find it triggering, having had anorexia, and still having bulimic tendencies, and I simply believe it is foolish and unnecessary to eat that little, the same as the things I do as part of my ED are probably viewed as foolish and unnecessary to those who have not had an ED. I always eat over 1200, and often above 1600 calories, and believe that eating below will more often than not, lead to falling off the wagon totally or to the weight being gained back once any attempt is made to eat a more regular and healthy amount again. I have seen it happen all too often. You can easily distinguish those who care most about the scale and whom are on 'a diet' and those who care about their health most and whom are in it for a lifestyle change that is sustainable.

    I have had people remove me because of my periodic binge/purge issues, and I don't care, quite frankly. That is the way the world works. People have their own standards, beliefs, limitations. I have been there, in regards to eating ridiculously low calories, done that, got the t shirt. I also have the poor bone density to prove it. I'd sooner keep my metabolism burning at a good rate, and feed my body what it needs, outside of my ED slipups and even with those, I still make sure I am eating, and keeping down over 1500 calories every day.

    To each their own.
  • PS2CR
    PS2CR Posts: 98 Member
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    I am a grown woman and I can make my own choices.

    The first thing I did after putting the app on my iPhone was to log in here and put my profile and diary on private. I did that because this is about my being accountable to myself--not to others--for my choices. The app keeps me honest, and gives me a cumulative record of my nutritional progress. While I don't mind the occasional encouragement from my RL friends, I'm essentially doing this for me, not for anyone else.

    After I got into the forums and discovered this 'unfriending' trend, I was glad I kept things private. I read threads (eg. "Why do some people keep their diaries private?") where it seemed a given that you must want other people poring over your diary and holding you accountable for deviations if you are using this app. Not saying that can't be useful for those who want it, but it seems a stretch to assume all should want that. For me, it would feel a bit intrusive, and it essentially translates into holding myself accountable to everyone's personal opinions on here, some of which I've discovered can be very rigid and narrow if concerning a personal hot button. Trying to meet my goals plus everyone else's is a dependable exercise in futility, for me.

    'Friends' don't truly unfriend you (in real life) for being under your calorie goal on any given day. Only certain people online whose agenda is longer than their fuse might do that. If you choose to keep your diary open, just keep in mind there is a contingent on here who are anxious about eating disorders and being enablers to that, and who may in their zeal be too quick to judge.
  • Alohathin
    Alohathin Posts: 360 Member
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    There is conclusive evidence to show that EVERYONE who consistently eats fewer calories than they burn exercising is unhealthy.
    Which of course isn't always the same as eating under 1200 calories.

    And we need a better definition of 'consistently' - is it for a few days, weeks, months, years? Have you got any links to said evidence to hand out of interest?

    Correct. It's still unhealthy to eat 1500 calories if you are burning 2000 through exercise. (again, consistently. It's not going to be a big deal if you do it once in a while)

    I've read some research on it. I'll have to relocate it when I have time. There are a ton of articles out there that don't cite any scientific sources, and it's a little difficult to weed through them to find the ones that are backed by research. I'll try to do that in the next day or so.
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
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    I've defriended people for eating very few calories. It's not because I have something against them; it's because I want my friends to be somewhat similar to me in what they eat and how they exercise. Or really hot.