Confused... I'm trading addictions?

justjenn1977
justjenn1977 Posts: 437 Member
in Chit-Chat
So this lady I used to go to church with several years ago (that I haven't seen in person in about two years) who happens to be my friend on facebook sent me this message... We haven't spoken in a while...

Hi Jenn, Congratulations on your weight loss, you look great. I just want to remind you not to trade one addiction for another; but to do all things in moderation. Addictions are simply not healthy in the long run. Keep up the good work! Blessings, K


I'm confused... I don't have any idea why she would send me this message... I don't go to the gym every day (I'm lucky to get there twice a week... )... I haven't lost weight too rapidly... (it has taken me 8 years to lose this much... I take frequent mental health breaks and maintain...)


How am I trading addictions?
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Replies

  • Sox90716
    Sox90716 Posts: 976 Member
    You're not. Ignore her and drive on.
  • GretchenReine
    GretchenReine Posts: 1,374 Member
    Have you thought of asking her? Maybe she misunderstands what you're doing? It doesn't sound like you're doing anything in an unhealthy manner at all. Surely you can ask her. If she feels it important enough to send you the message, she should be ok with clarifying it.
  • justjenn1977
    justjenn1977 Posts: 437 Member
    I did ask... Haven't gotten a reply yet...
  • trophywife24
    trophywife24 Posts: 1,472 Member
    I'm assuming that she means going from a food addiction to a dieting addiction.

    Please don't let other people projecting their insecurities about weight onto you hinder your path to better health. Congrats on your weight loss :)
  • Glasgow_Vegan
    Glasgow_Vegan Posts: 209 Member
    She sounds passive-aggressive. Maybe she doesn't like you losing weight.
  • cfmay
    cfmay Posts: 19
    Some people just have to put their "two cents" worth of advice in. She seems to have made the assumption your now addicted to being healthy. Sorry...if that's an addiction, there are WAY worse out there. I get her point that she was trying to make, ie: some people stop smoking only to pick up eating candy..
  • katevarner
    katevarner Posts: 884 Member
    I'm assuming that she means going from a food addiction to a dieting addiction.

    Please don't let other people projecting their insecurities about weight onto you hinder your path to better health. Congrats on your weight loss :)

    I agree. Either she's jealous or she's noticed a lot of posts on facebook where you are talking about what you are doing and it seems to her that you are overdoing it. If she doesn't respond to your question, I'd just ignore her. I'd be interested to hear her response if she does, but don't let her get you down. Your description of your journey sounds very reasonable and healthy.
  • cfmay
    cfmay Posts: 19
    She sounds passive-aggressive. Maybe she doesn't like you losing weight.

    I THINK THIS IS EXACTLY RIGHT!
  • 1960HikerDude
    1960HikerDude Posts: 215 Member
    There is a tendency these days to label every bad behavior as addiction. Some folks seek ways avoid taking personal responsibility for their actions. Popular psychologists are more then happy to oblige. Perverts are now sex addicts. Gluttons are addicted to food. Gimme a break! As General Herbert Norman Schwarzkopf once said, "That is what the troops call bovine scatology".

    What you are doing my friend, is replacing bad habits with good habits. IMHO, your friend may be projecting her rationalizations for her bad behavior on to you.
  • AngelsInThighHighs
    AngelsInThighHighs Posts: 247 Member
    Id rather be addicted to being healthy then not :/...Id say your trading up
  • AZKristi
    AZKristi Posts: 1,801 Member
    Some people just feel the need to comment on things that are none of their business.
  • ScorpionReaver
    ScorpionReaver Posts: 56
    You should point out to "K" that she's obviously addicted to getting into other people's business...and Facebook...she's addicted to getting into other people's business on Facebook!
    That's a terrible one :o

    You're looking great, btw

    Reason for edit: Initially left out a quotation mark, D'oh!
  • MinMin97
    MinMin97 Posts: 2,674 Member
    Oohhh. Bad.
    Not true!
    It takes intensity and determination to make a change like this.
    Her bad!
    Yes, I'd put that one out of my mind, if it were said to me...yuck.
  • PaulaDygert
    PaulaDygert Posts: 148 Member
    Coming from a person who is married to an addict (not saying you are but sounds like she is around someone that is) she is probably just trying to bring up a concern out of love for you and your health. But if you are doing everything right which it seems you are!!! Just kindly tell her thank you for her concern but you are losing the weight in a healthy way not overly doing it.
  • MrEyeCandy
    MrEyeCandy Posts: 15
    Just saying......sounds rather religious not a spiritual comment. Does she believe our bodies are a temple? Shouldn't we take care of our 'temple'? Keep up the good work; you appear to be on the right track.
  • JacksMom12
    JacksMom12 Posts: 1,044 Member
    She sounds passive-aggressive. Maybe she doesn't like you losing weight.

    Yep!
  • BSchoberg
    BSchoberg Posts: 712 Member
    "That is what the troops call bovine scatology."
    .

    Ok, that's probably the best thing I've read in DAYS!

    And, it's exactly right --- her messge to you is almost verbatum what my step-mother has said to me (more than once). The worst of it with my step-mother is: she'll pray about it after the fact (never before, mind you) and come apologize to me. We've gone round and round and I just ignore her now.
  • busymomma97
    busymomma97 Posts: 75 Member
    Maybe she thought you were addicted to facebook, as some people truly are, and is now assuming that you will become addicted to this website..as I am!!:smile: Either way, it's not here place to judge or condemn. Welcome to the site, I LOVE it..and yes sometimes I do think I am a bit addicted to the site..but hey, if it helps me on my healthy lifestyle and keeps me motivated then it's a good addiction. People often think addictions are always bad, and that's not always the case. Good luck along your journey!
  • shamr0ck
    shamr0ck Posts: 296 Member
    No idea what your lady friend meant. but i will freely admit i traded my addiction to food for an addiction to fitness. And i don't see anything wrong with that.
  • BarbBlue
    BarbBlue Posts: 251
    She actually sounds like someone that is trying to bring you down. Makes no sense to just send something out of the blue like that if she wasn't. Ignore her and move on.
  • MelissaGraham7
    MelissaGraham7 Posts: 406 Member
    I don't think you have to get hostile with her. She is probably just a caring person and there ARE those who will substitute one addiction for another. Let's face it, most of us got fat by being "food addicts." Experts say that you don't really give up a habit, you replace it with another. So, you are replacing bad habits with good and doing everything correctly. You could simply not get offended at her caring but tell her thanks for her concern but you are doing everything in a healthy manner and plan on this being a lifestyle forever. No one know what motivated the other woman's comment. She may know someone who did that. She may just be showing her concern. It is sooooo easy to misconstrue words on these social sites. Let's not be quick to brand her jealous, insecure, etc. If she's a good friend, call her, for heaven's sake. If not, jot her a note as above and forget about it.
  • Susann1963
    Susann1963 Posts: 126 Member
    I would say I am addicted to food, whether thinking about it, planning where I'm going to eat it etc. Since my Gastric Bypass I have read that people that have had bypass that can no longer overeat, MAY have issues substituting one addiction for another (example gambling, sex, alcohol). I say MAY because it doesn't necessarily happen and by NO means is it her business! I agree with the above posters that you are doing fantastic and perhaps she is a negative person, wanting to elevate herself with such a passive aggressive comment. Keep up the great work, your loss is fantastic!!
  • Sharon009
    Sharon009 Posts: 327 Member
    It irks me when people give misplaced advice just because it's something they went through without even having knowledge if its a problem for you as well.
  • jamk1446
    jamk1446 Posts: 5,577 Member
    I don't think you have to get hostile with her. She is probably just a caring person and there ARE those who will substitute one addiction for another. Let's face it, most of us got fat by being "food addicts." Experts say that you don't really give up a habit, you replace it with another. So, you are replacing bad habits with good and doing everything correctly. You could simply not get offended at her caring but tell her thanks for her concern but you are doing everything in a healthy manner and plan on this being a lifestyle forever. No one know what motivated the other woman's comment. She may know someone who did that. She may just be showing her concern. It is sooooo easy to misconstrue words on these social sites. Let's not be quick to brand her jealous, insecure, etc. If she's a good friend, call her, for heaven's sake. If not, jot her a note as above and forget about it.

    This.
  • cressievargo
    cressievargo Posts: 392 Member
    I don't think you have to get hostile with her. She is probably just a caring person and there ARE those who will substitute one addiction for another. Let's face it, most of us got fat by being "food addicts." Experts say that you don't really give up a habit, you replace it with another. So, you are replacing bad habits with good and doing everything correctly. You could simply not get offended at her caring but tell her thanks for her concern but you are doing everything in a healthy manner and plan on this being a lifestyle forever. No one know what motivated the other woman's comment. She may know someone who did that. She may just be showing her concern. It is sooooo easy to misconstrue words on these social sites. Let's not be quick to brand her jealous, insecure, etc. If she's a good friend, call her, for heaven's sake. If not, jot her a note as above and forget about it.

    This.

    While this may be true, her comment was in rather poor taste. You don't say something like that to someone you haven't seen in 2 yrs.
  • yourenotmine
    yourenotmine Posts: 645 Member
    Meh, maybe she was just confused. Sounds like she's trying to look out for you though. Just try to accept it as if she were trying to be the best friend she knew how to be and don't worry about it. People are strange. :)
  • barkin43
    barkin43 Posts: 508 Member
    Some people just feel the need to comment on things that are none of their business.

    This, exactly!
  • fwalz3
    fwalz3 Posts: 31 Member
    If being healthy is an addiction - SIGN ME UP!!!
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    Unfriend and block... You haven't spoke in 2 years and she comes out the blue with negativity? You don't need that in your life.
  • Linda_Darlene
    Linda_Darlene Posts: 453 Member
    Ignore her.

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