Confused... I'm trading addictions?

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24

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  • MelissaGraham7
    MelissaGraham7 Posts: 405 Member
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    I don't think you have to get hostile with her. She is probably just a caring person and there ARE those who will substitute one addiction for another. Let's face it, most of us got fat by being "food addicts." Experts say that you don't really give up a habit, you replace it with another. So, you are replacing bad habits with good and doing everything correctly. You could simply not get offended at her caring but tell her thanks for her concern but you are doing everything in a healthy manner and plan on this being a lifestyle forever. No one know what motivated the other woman's comment. She may know someone who did that. She may just be showing her concern. It is sooooo easy to misconstrue words on these social sites. Let's not be quick to brand her jealous, insecure, etc. If she's a good friend, call her, for heaven's sake. If not, jot her a note as above and forget about it.
  • Susann1963
    Susann1963 Posts: 126 Member
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    I would say I am addicted to food, whether thinking about it, planning where I'm going to eat it etc. Since my Gastric Bypass I have read that people that have had bypass that can no longer overeat, MAY have issues substituting one addiction for another (example gambling, sex, alcohol). I say MAY because it doesn't necessarily happen and by NO means is it her business! I agree with the above posters that you are doing fantastic and perhaps she is a negative person, wanting to elevate herself with such a passive aggressive comment. Keep up the great work, your loss is fantastic!!
  • Sharon009
    Sharon009 Posts: 327 Member
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    It irks me when people give misplaced advice just because it's something they went through without even having knowledge if its a problem for you as well.
  • jamk1446
    jamk1446 Posts: 5,577 Member
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    I don't think you have to get hostile with her. She is probably just a caring person and there ARE those who will substitute one addiction for another. Let's face it, most of us got fat by being "food addicts." Experts say that you don't really give up a habit, you replace it with another. So, you are replacing bad habits with good and doing everything correctly. You could simply not get offended at her caring but tell her thanks for her concern but you are doing everything in a healthy manner and plan on this being a lifestyle forever. No one know what motivated the other woman's comment. She may know someone who did that. She may just be showing her concern. It is sooooo easy to misconstrue words on these social sites. Let's not be quick to brand her jealous, insecure, etc. If she's a good friend, call her, for heaven's sake. If not, jot her a note as above and forget about it.

    This.
  • cressievargo
    cressievargo Posts: 392 Member
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    I don't think you have to get hostile with her. She is probably just a caring person and there ARE those who will substitute one addiction for another. Let's face it, most of us got fat by being "food addicts." Experts say that you don't really give up a habit, you replace it with another. So, you are replacing bad habits with good and doing everything correctly. You could simply not get offended at her caring but tell her thanks for her concern but you are doing everything in a healthy manner and plan on this being a lifestyle forever. No one know what motivated the other woman's comment. She may know someone who did that. She may just be showing her concern. It is sooooo easy to misconstrue words on these social sites. Let's not be quick to brand her jealous, insecure, etc. If she's a good friend, call her, for heaven's sake. If not, jot her a note as above and forget about it.

    This.

    While this may be true, her comment was in rather poor taste. You don't say something like that to someone you haven't seen in 2 yrs.
  • yourenotmine
    yourenotmine Posts: 645 Member
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    Meh, maybe she was just confused. Sounds like she's trying to look out for you though. Just try to accept it as if she were trying to be the best friend she knew how to be and don't worry about it. People are strange. :)
  • barkin43
    barkin43 Posts: 508 Member
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    Some people just feel the need to comment on things that are none of their business.

    This, exactly!
  • fwalz3
    fwalz3 Posts: 31 Member
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    If being healthy is an addiction - SIGN ME UP!!!
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
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    Unfriend and block... You haven't spoke in 2 years and she comes out the blue with negativity? You don't need that in your life.
  • Linda_Darlene
    Linda_Darlene Posts: 453 Member
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    Ignore her.
  • CJisinShape
    CJisinShape Posts: 1,404 Member
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    Have you asked yourself, what are you putting out there? Are you talking about food, health and fitness in most of your fb posts? If its not an addiction (fitness or fb), could the % of posts related to fitness lead someone to think that's all you care about? Not everyone wants their life story on fb, so they post about topics they are more comfortable sharing, which can lead others to think they are one dimensional, i.e., obsessed. If you note the rest of her message, it was all positive and congratulatory. What kind of friend would she be if she saw you headed for danger and didn't share her concern? Pray about it and ask God to help you see if there is any truth to what she's saying and what to do about it.
  • JenniBaby85
    JenniBaby85 Posts: 855 Member
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    Have you thought of asking her? Maybe she misunderstands what you're doing? It doesn't sound like you're doing anything in an unhealthy manner at all. Surely you can ask her. If she feels it important enough to send you the message, she should be ok with clarifying it.

    ^This. Definitely. Here you may just get Christianity bashing from some people.
  • revtvolson
    revtvolson Posts: 1 Member
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    She probably read it in a book, or more likely, saw it on Facebook and felt compelled to share her "wisdom." At best, she is trying to support you and muffed the job completely. At worst, she is someone who deals with her own problems by making sure she points out what is wrong with others. I'm a pastor, and I would say her remarks have nothing to do with her faith. Tell her thanks for her concern, it was not really helpful, but you assume she meant well. Let it go -- keep doing what you are doing.
    So this lady I used to go to church with several years ago (that I haven't seen in person in about two years) who happens to be my friend on facebook sent me this message... We haven't spoken in a while...

    Hi Jenn, Congratulations on your weight loss, you look great. I just want to remind you not to trade one addiction for another; but to do all things in moderation. Addictions are simply not healthy in the long run. Keep up the good work! Blessings, K


    I'm confused... I don't have any idea why she would send me this message... I don't go to the gym every day (I'm lucky to get there twice a week... )... I haven't lost weight too rapidly... (it has taken me 8 years to lose this much... I take frequent mental health breaks and maintain...)


    How am I trading addictions?
  • Kaimana94
    Kaimana94 Posts: 165 Member
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    If living a healty life style is an addiction then I'm in
  • mahlerosa
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    Maybe she is jealous? IGNORE her. Some people just have to say something negative!! UGH!
  • 4ALongerLife
    4ALongerLife Posts: 26 Member
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    That's someone that is a control freak and jealous of you. She is trying to put doubts in your head. Please pay no mind to morons.
  • flobeedoodle
    flobeedoodle Posts: 176 Member
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    She sounds passive-aggressive. Maybe she doesn't like you losing weight.

    I THINK THIS IS EXACTLY RIGHT!

    My first thought was that the church-lady was mentally unstable. Giving unsolicited advice like that suggests an inflated sense of self-importance that seems larger than just being an obnoxious busy-body, and extends more into the realm of "I have been granted supernatural powers of discernment and am therefore called to counsel all who need it because with great power comes great responsibility."

    In any case, if it were me, I would write the woman off as unfit for friendship and avoid her, regardless of her actual brand of crazy.
  • VanessaHeartsMasr
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    Just saying......sounds rather religious not a spiritual comment. Does she believe our bodies are a temple? Shouldn't we take care of our 'temple'? Keep up the good work; you appear to be on the right track.
    I agree.
  • bastgoddess7
    bastgoddess7 Posts: 64 Member
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    You are not trading addictions. Ignore her, she's hatin. You are leading a healthy life now.
  • back_to_18
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    She sounds passive-aggressive. Maybe she doesn't like you losing weight.

    Yep! ^THIS^ Totally.

    Don't let others spoil your enjoyment of what you've accomplished.