Confused... I'm trading addictions?

2

Replies

  • CJisinShape
    CJisinShape Posts: 1,404 Member
    Have you asked yourself, what are you putting out there? Are you talking about food, health and fitness in most of your fb posts? If its not an addiction (fitness or fb), could the % of posts related to fitness lead someone to think that's all you care about? Not everyone wants their life story on fb, so they post about topics they are more comfortable sharing, which can lead others to think they are one dimensional, i.e., obsessed. If you note the rest of her message, it was all positive and congratulatory. What kind of friend would she be if she saw you headed for danger and didn't share her concern? Pray about it and ask God to help you see if there is any truth to what she's saying and what to do about it.
  • JenniBaby85
    JenniBaby85 Posts: 855 Member
    Have you thought of asking her? Maybe she misunderstands what you're doing? It doesn't sound like you're doing anything in an unhealthy manner at all. Surely you can ask her. If she feels it important enough to send you the message, she should be ok with clarifying it.

    ^This. Definitely. Here you may just get Christianity bashing from some people.
  • revtvolson
    revtvolson Posts: 1 Member
    She probably read it in a book, or more likely, saw it on Facebook and felt compelled to share her "wisdom." At best, she is trying to support you and muffed the job completely. At worst, she is someone who deals with her own problems by making sure she points out what is wrong with others. I'm a pastor, and I would say her remarks have nothing to do with her faith. Tell her thanks for her concern, it was not really helpful, but you assume she meant well. Let it go -- keep doing what you are doing.
    So this lady I used to go to church with several years ago (that I haven't seen in person in about two years) who happens to be my friend on facebook sent me this message... We haven't spoken in a while...

    Hi Jenn, Congratulations on your weight loss, you look great. I just want to remind you not to trade one addiction for another; but to do all things in moderation. Addictions are simply not healthy in the long run. Keep up the good work! Blessings, K


    I'm confused... I don't have any idea why she would send me this message... I don't go to the gym every day (I'm lucky to get there twice a week... )... I haven't lost weight too rapidly... (it has taken me 8 years to lose this much... I take frequent mental health breaks and maintain...)


    How am I trading addictions?
  • Kaimana94
    Kaimana94 Posts: 165 Member
    If living a healty life style is an addiction then I'm in
  • mahlerosa
    mahlerosa Posts: 56
    Maybe she is jealous? IGNORE her. Some people just have to say something negative!! UGH!
  • 4ALongerLife
    4ALongerLife Posts: 26 Member
    That's someone that is a control freak and jealous of you. She is trying to put doubts in your head. Please pay no mind to morons.
  • flobeedoodle
    flobeedoodle Posts: 176 Member
    She sounds passive-aggressive. Maybe she doesn't like you losing weight.

    I THINK THIS IS EXACTLY RIGHT!

    My first thought was that the church-lady was mentally unstable. Giving unsolicited advice like that suggests an inflated sense of self-importance that seems larger than just being an obnoxious busy-body, and extends more into the realm of "I have been granted supernatural powers of discernment and am therefore called to counsel all who need it because with great power comes great responsibility."

    In any case, if it were me, I would write the woman off as unfit for friendship and avoid her, regardless of her actual brand of crazy.
  • VanessaHeartsMasr
    VanessaHeartsMasr Posts: 727
    Just saying......sounds rather religious not a spiritual comment. Does she believe our bodies are a temple? Shouldn't we take care of our 'temple'? Keep up the good work; you appear to be on the right track.
    I agree.
  • bastgoddess7
    bastgoddess7 Posts: 64 Member
    You are not trading addictions. Ignore her, she's hatin. You are leading a healthy life now.
  • back_to_18
    back_to_18 Posts: 28
    She sounds passive-aggressive. Maybe she doesn't like you losing weight.

    Yep! ^THIS^ Totally.

    Don't let others spoil your enjoyment of what you've accomplished.
  • starrrjo
    starrrjo Posts: 101 Member
    'Rain on my Parade' springs to mind.
    Little miss jealous I think.
  • AJ_Pete
    AJ_Pete Posts: 863 Member
    Tell the b*itch to mind her own business and that Jesus frowns upon passive-aggressive judging.


    Keep up the good work.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    Maybe she was just giving general advice and didn't mean anything bad at all.
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    post up this picture on facebook.

    IMG950889.jpg
  • opuntia
    opuntia Posts: 860 Member
    You could simply not get offended at her caring but tell her thanks for her concern but you are doing everything in a healthy manner and plan on this being a lifestyle forever.

    I agree with this. You don't know what motivated her comment, and there are people who get obsessed with losing weight and it can become a disorder, and she may have experience of people she loves going through this.

    Sure, her comment was a bit inappropriate and intrusive, but not everyone knows how to express their concerns in appropriate ways. Especially church people, in my experience. If I were to get offended each time someone gave me inappropriate advice, I'd be wasting a lot of emotion and energy in negativity. It's your choice whether or not to allow yourself to be offended, regardless of her intentions.

    If she meant it in a kind manner, the reply suggested above will put her concerns to rest. And if she meant it in a snarky manner, the reply suggested above will show her that her hostility hasn't touched you in the slightest. Whereas if you reply snarkily she'll have the satisfaction of knowing that her comment ruffled your feathers.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,454 Member
    People still use facebook?
  • juliesjuke
    juliesjuke Posts: 93 Member
    It sounds to me that you are on the right track.Don't let other peoples comments sway you. Keep up the great job !
  • hockra
    hockra Posts: 43 Member
    I would ignore it. Based on what you said about your approach to fitness and losing weight, sounds like you are doing well in that area, and you can be appropriately proud of it! Don't let this comment steal your joy or happiness in your progress! I am a firm believer that God Himself is able to tell us when we are going the wrong way, and it's between Him and us {and yes, I do believe, our close family and friends who really love us, can point out how we can improve, and when done in the right way, it is not meant to hurt us}.

    It's probably inappropriate for someone (even a past friend) who hasn't talked to you in awhile to say something like this...could be considered controlling. It would be different if you had asked for help/advice from this person, but doesn't sound like you did.
  • hockra
    hockra Posts: 43 Member
    DITTO!
    If being healthy is an addiction - SIGN ME UP!!!
  • justjenn1977
    justjenn1977 Posts: 437 Member
    Thanks everyone... Just woke up and got her response... (I work nights)... Apparently she was responding to a post I made a while ago...


    You stated that you were addicted to working out and adrenaline, and that you wanted to get healthy. By definition, an addiction is not a healthy behavior. I know people who are addicted to athletics and they suffer from all kinds of social, physical and emotional issues because of it.

    Medical Dictionary
    addiction ad·dic·tion (ə-dĭk'shən) n.
    Habitual psychological and physiological dependence on a substance or practice beyond one's voluntary control.



    I said "it was an expression, one meant to say I can feel when I don't exercise... Im not in any danger of becoming addicted to it... I appreciate your concern"


    The plan is to ignore future posts...

    I don't know why I let my self esteem get so shattered that every little thing gets taken as a personal attack... I guess I have to work on getting my mind as in shape as my body
  • LilMissSunshine_
    LilMissSunshine_ Posts: 520
    She's just jelly.
  • opuntia
    opuntia Posts: 860 Member
    Aw, bless her - she just took what you said literally, and didn't realise it was an expression. Maybe she is on the autism spectrum - that is a very common autistic trait. I take things literally a lot, so I can empathise!
  • Sharyn913
    Sharyn913 Posts: 777 Member
    My favorite thing in life is when people who you haven't seen or spoken to in ages but are friends with on face book assume they know your entire life.

    It's nice that face book allows you to block what people see on your profile!
  • perfectingpatti
    perfectingpatti Posts: 1,037 Member
    You gotta love the nosy, I mean caring, church people! Hopefully she didn't go to the prayer line to ask the community to pray for you and your new addiction!
  • _VoV
    _VoV Posts: 1,494 Member
    First of all: congratulations on your awesome accomplishments. It sounds like you are doing everything just right.

    Second of all: I think her 'advice' is more about her and less about you. It sounds like the sort of general caution that comes from someone who has experienced trading addictions, or knows someone close who has. Or maybe she read an article in 'Readers Digest' recently.
  • dorthymantooth
    dorthymantooth Posts: 2 Member
    I've had this happen to me before.
  • ScorpionReaver
    ScorpionReaver Posts: 56
    People still use facebook?

    bwahahahaha Frakking EXACTLY :p
  • icandothis_dani
    icandothis_dani Posts: 10
    She sounds passive-aggressive. Maybe she doesn't like you losing weight.

    thats what i thought
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    I'd probs tell her to trade her addiction to put down people with an addiction for reading the bible >.>
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    I'd probs tell her to trade her addiction to put down people with an addiction for reading the bible >.>

    I'd tell her to read the date of the original post.

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