Dating vs. "going out"

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angelicasmommy
angelicasmommy Posts: 303 Member
in Chit-Chat
I can't be the only one who thinks dating and going out are two different things! I havn't been in a relationship in over 2 years, but I have dated a few guys since then. Family and friends are a little confused when they ask if we are going out yet, and I tell them no, we are just dating. I guess I am picky, I don't jump into a relationship, I want to date to get to know them first. So I get "Dating and going out is the same thing." a lot. So far my sister is the only one who is the same way as me.
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Replies

  • hunter624
    hunter624 Posts: 252
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    I don't know I'll have to ask my wife.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
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    One you put out and the other you don't? :huh:
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    And I see it backwards. I've gone out with a lot of guys, but I've dated a few. I see dating to be the long term word.
  • oOMusicBabii
    oOMusicBabii Posts: 494
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    I agree that there is a difference between dating and going out.

    Now which is which is where I flipflop on.
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
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    And I see it backwards. I've gone out with a lot of guys, but I've dated a few. I see dating to be the long term word.

    Same here.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I called it "going out" in middle school. As an adult, I call it dating.
  • Lizlicious2187
    Lizlicious2187 Posts: 178 Member
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    I haven't been in a relationship in about 5 years but I have dated people. For me I consider dating someone the time before you actually have the whole define the relationship talk. I don't really use the phrase going out unless I specifically say, "im going out with so and so tonight". Since I haven't been actual relationship in awhile, it's been a little weird for me trying to figure out if I'm exclusive with someone or not because so many people are different....especially since don't seem to have the balls to bring it up myself :grumble:
  • rossi02
    rossi02 Posts: 549 Member
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    And I see it backwards. I've gone out with a lot of guys, but I've dated a few. I see dating to be the long term word.

    Yep.. this has been how I viewed the two as well.
  • bluebetty32
    bluebetty32 Posts: 1 Member
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    I called it "going out" in middle school. As an adult, I call it dating.

    I agree, but it does seem "going out" implies casual friendships as opposed to "dating" would imply a serious intent. Just a thought.....
  • dansls1
    dansls1 Posts: 309 Member
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    All those terms are just BS definitions of the games people play who don't want a committed relationship IMHO.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I called it "going out" in middle school. As an adult, I call it dating.

    I agree, but it does seem "going out" implies casual friendships as opposed to "dating" would imply a serious intent. Just a thought.....

    I can see it in that context. As in, "I'm going out with this guy tonight." But in the context the OP used, it's a childish term.
    All those terms are just BS definitions of the games people play who don't want a committed relationship IMHO.
    I don't think "dating" is a term for game-playing. I mean, if you're seeing each other seriously (going on dates) but not engaged or living together, what else do you call it? People in more committed relationships often refer back to "when we were dating."
  • angelicasmommy
    angelicasmommy Posts: 303 Member
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    I haven't been in a relationship in about 5 years but I have dated people. For me I consider dating someone the time before you actually have the whole define the relationship talk. I don't really use the phrase going out unless I specifically say, "im going out with so and so tonight". Since I haven't been actual relationship in awhile, it's been a little weird for me trying to figure out if I'm exclusive with someone or not because so many people are different....especially since don't seem to have the balls to bring it up myself :grumble:

    This
  • carriempls
    carriempls Posts: 326 Member
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    If you're talking literal definitions of the phrases they are the same to me. Dating, hanging out with, going out, etc all says you're seeing someone with romantic intentions.

    Sounds like to you "going out" means "in a committed relationship". OK. You can call it that but others probably don't know what you mean by that.
  • angelicasmommy
    angelicasmommy Posts: 303 Member
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    Well when I meet someone, I go on a date because I want to get to know them. I don't say "Hey, lets be exclusive and your my boyfriend!" after the first date, so we continue to date. If, after a few dates I decide that I do want to be exclusive with them, then we are boyfriend/girlfriend (which yes, sounds like a childish term but I can't think of a better term for it) I define dating as the period of time from meeting someone, and the point in time where we "define the relationship."
  • carriempls
    carriempls Posts: 326 Member
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    I agree with you but to me they are the same. I'm dating this guy, I've been seeing this guy, I've been going out with this guy - all the same. All implies you are not yet in a committed relationship.

    Once you are, then you're no longer "just" dating or going out or whatever. You're in a relationship and call each other boy/girlfriend.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    Well when I meet someone, I go on a date because I want to get to know them. I don't say "Hey, lets be exclusive and your my boyfriend!" after the first date, so we continue to date. If, after a few dates I decide that I do want to be exclusive with them, then we are boyfriend/girlfriend (which yes, sounds like a childish term but I can't think of a better term for it) I define dating as the period of time from meeting someone, and the point in time where we "define the relationship."

    I would just say, "We've been on a few dates." Once defined, you're "exclusive" or "exclusively dating."

    I hate the terms boyfriend and girlfriend after a certain age, but I agree it's tough to find something better. I don't like "partner," either. I call mine "the boyfriend" to strangers and by name to people who know us. I don't know what else to call him! lol
  • eatcleanNtraindirty
    eatcleanNtraindirty Posts: 444 Member
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    I agree with you but to me they are the same. I'm dating this guy, I've been seeing this guy, I've been going out with this guy - all the same. All implies you are not yet in a committed relationship.

    Once you are, then you're no longer "just" dating or going out or whatever. You're in a relationship and call each other boy/girlfriend.

    ^^yep
  • pixtotts
    pixtotts Posts: 552 Member
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    interestingly i see them as being different but the other way round...
    going out - casual - its what we did at school "will you go out with me?"
    dating - relationship
    confusingness!
    x
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
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    And I see it backwards. I've gone out with a lot of guys, but I've dated a few. I see dating to be the long term word.


    and just where does "gettin' it onnn" fit in?
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    And I see it backwards. I've gone out with a lot of guys, but I've dated a few. I see dating to be the long term word.


    and just where does "gettin' it onnn" fit in?

    Hooking up. Duh.

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