My experience with women...SMH

Options
24

Replies

  • geebusuk
    geebusuk Posts: 3,348 Member
    Options
    I generally prefer the 'trimmer' lady; one of the reasons for getting in shape myself because I've got to expect men of them feel the same way about men.
    Though to some degree men have it a bit easier as stereotypically it bothers women less.
  • allifantastical
    allifantastical Posts: 946 Member
    Options
    I don't think this is true at all. In my experience, it's opposite. I actually like bigger guys and I can't stand super skinny guys, sorry!

    Me too!
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
    Options
    I find that a lot of women that I hang out with want a man who is in super shape, but plainly doesn't think SHE HERSELF needs to get in shape (only to complain about how self conscious she feels around her man... hmmm)
    (That's just MY PERSONAL experience, and I'm not downing anyone for it, just a thought. I mean everyone wants equality in a relationship, but it seems that that equality doesn't count when it comes to fitness.)

    (And for those who are going to read too much into this, yes yes, there are other things to focus on in a relationship, but no matter how LITTLE the physical matters, the point its that it DOES matter... maybe not to you, but it does to many people)

    Yeah, I've dated a couple of girls like that. It never really lasts. They may look good but the fact they're lazy starts to take it's toll. I would much rather have a girl who doesn't have the perfect body but is active than a girl who looks great but sits around all day.
  • FierceFox81
    FierceFox81 Posts: 89
    Options
    I find that a lot of women that I hang out with want a man who is in super shape, but plainly doesn't think SHE HERSELF needs to get in shape (only to complain about how self conscious she feels around her man... hmmm)
    (That's just MY PERSONAL experience, and I'm not downing anyone for it, just a thought. I mean everyone wants equality in a relationship, but it seems that that equality doesn't count when it comes to fitness.)

    (And for those who are going to read too much into this, yes yes, there are other things to focus on in a relationship, but no matter how LITTLE the physical matters, the point its that it DOES matter... maybe not to you, but it does to many people)

    I agree! I have a very close friend that let herself go once she got married. Her hubby gained some weight too, but she gained way more then him. She picks on him about his weight gain all the time. But goodness...if he does it back, she FREAKS OUT. hahaha

    Then she is always saying how fat she is, and how she needs to workout more..all said while she's eating pizza and drinking a huge beer. SMH
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
    Options
    i dunno....i've seen women like that...but to flip it...i've been with men like that...

    my daughters father made it VERY clear that I was competely and totally ugly and undesirable and that I should be blessed he chose to spend his time with me...

    funny thing...when I dumped his *kitten*, he was VERY upset that *I*, the ugly one, would leave HIM.....

    five years later and and 132 pounds later, everytime I run into him he's made it VERY clear that I'm now "acceptable" for him to take back...

    problem is, you can lose weight, but you can't fix stupid and you can't fix someone who is so ugly inside....

    so he's out of luck.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Options
    aka fat military wives because for some reason sitting at home doing nothing is harder than what their husbands do.

    Are these wives with or without children?

    Because, while what their husbands do is most definitely difficult, it is also very physical. Taking care of children (especially more than one), usually working (I don't know any who don't) and keeping up with a house doesn't burn the calories that traipsing through a dessert carrying 80 pounds of equipment does, but it also doesn't leave a lot of time for exercise.

    Not to mention the depression many feel when their husbands leave for long periods of time. Depression isn't particularly motivating.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Options
    Shallowness is shallow.

    Obviously, attraction is necessary, but to demand perfection in order to be attracted to someone? Eh.

    Thankfully, I have had the good fortune to not know people like that in my life.

    Nobody demanded perfection, that I saw here. I would certainly prefer to have someone be at the same level of fitness as myself. I don't consider it shallow to be attracted to fit and healthy people more than someone who is not.

    The first line of the OP:
    I find that a lot of women that I hang out with want a man who is in super shape,

    From the third response in this thread:
    It's interesting that women do this, but IME I see far more men who couldn't see their belt buckle with a mirror and a map demanding that women look like lingerie models.
  • CORTNEY5
    CORTNEY5 Posts: 87 Member
    Options
    I think it all comes down to personal preference, and of course, when you do get to know their personalities, it becomes less important. But initial physical attraction is definitely important.
  • CORTNEY5
    CORTNEY5 Posts: 87 Member
    Options
    [/quote]
    Yeah, I've dated a couple of girls like that. It never really lasts. They may look good but the fact they're lazy starts to take it's toll. I would much rather have a girl who doesn't have the perfect body but is active than a girl who looks great but sits around all day.
    [/quote]

    There is hope for us active, but not perfect women out there! :drinker:
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
    Options
    My own informal survey says that I see more good looking women with sub-par guys than the other way around.

    Seems to me the male ego is able to overlook far more in the mirror and that women are more likely to find someone less attractive to be acceptable if he has other good qualities.
  • JenniBaby85
    JenniBaby85 Posts: 855 Member
    Options
    I'm married, and one of us is in shape, and the other is not necessarily in shape :tongue: .
  • melsmith612
    melsmith612 Posts: 727 Member
    Options
    It's interesting that women do this, but IME I see far more men who couldn't see their belt buckle with a mirror and a map demanding that women look like lingerie models.

    ^^This. I can't even begin to explain how many guys I know that want girlfriends who look like super models but can't even be bothered to shower twice a week, shave their stubble or go without their daily trips to Wendy's.
  • MrsPong
    MrsPong Posts: 580 Member
    Options
    Your in the military and have the same mindset as my husband (Marine Corps 8 years)... So I understand where your coming from.

    My husband will ALWAYS be in better shape then me...It's his job to be the best shape.

    I have and will always feel as if i shouldnt be eating something "bad" or gain weight bc he will think different of me....Military men complain about their wives gaining weight or not working out, and I get that...but we do not run our lives the same as you military people do... We dont think the same.
  • AEROBICVIC
    AEROBICVIC Posts: 159 Member
    Options
    I feel physical attraction is a big part of a relationship. I was teaching aerobics at a gym years ago and this powerlifter came up the steps as i was going down them, we smiled at each other as our eyes met...I almost fell to my knees, there was something inside me that just brought butterflies. I got a tingling feeling every time I saw this guy. yes, it was his good looks and huge body that was my 1st attraction but a few years later we were introduced, we really got to know each other and I fell in love with his personality, morals, family and everything about him..... and now im happy to say he is my husband! That step incident was about 10 years ago and I still have the same feelings when I look into his eyes. We both have changed, I still teach but have put on some weight. He still lifts but not breaking world records like before and we are still attracted to each other like day 1. There is so much more to physical appearance but it's the lifestyle that is created that builds a relationship...at least in my situation.....we purchased the gym we met at, owned it for 3 years and had a chance to sell and we did. we have less stress in our lives now and can still enjoy working out together and eating a healthy lifestyle as a family. our son lifts and competes with us in powerlifing...it's a family thing with us. It's awesome to take MMA training classes with my son, lift with both of them, talk about our goals, support each other, cook special meals for what they are training for, understand what over training is, when each other needs to rest, when we need an extra push, eat more prot, take in more carbs...ect. The reason i say physical attraction is important, it's how I feel inside about the man I love, it's not something I can control, It's just real.
  • JenniBaby85
    JenniBaby85 Posts: 855 Member
    Options
    It's interesting that women do this, but IME I see far more men who couldn't see their belt buckle with a mirror and a map demanding that women look like lingerie models.

    ^^This. I can't even begin to explain how many guys I know that want girlfriends who look like super models but can't even be bothered to shower twice a week, shave their stubble or go without their daily trips to Wendy's.

    Absolutely, completely and TOTALLY agree!
    I heard a guy say (he was single, thankfully) that he wanted a size 8, and if he married a size 8, he wanted her to STAY a size 8. If she got pregnant, she would have 2 months after pregnancy to lose the weight, or he'd leave or cheat.

    The BIG kicker was, that this man was obese....
  • addaline22
    addaline22 Posts: 114
    Options
    thats a good observation. My hubs is ripped. me, xtra squishy. But following his example after kids and health issues, I am getting down to healthy.
  • ChitownFoodie
    ChitownFoodie Posts: 1,562 Member
    Options
    Me: 100lbs, fit as a fiddle
    Matty: 180lbs, squishy in the middle. He used to be 265.

    Just the way I like it. I've got nothing but love for the "nice guy" regardless of the way he looks. He cooks, he cleans, he takes out the trash, but none of that matters. The only thing that ever mattered to me was the fact that when I need a shoulder to cry on he is there and when I am in the mood to go run (literally run) to the store 2 miles away to get gelato hes coming with me. He doesn't complain, he merely says, "I am there for you because you are there for me." My Matty is one sexy man because he loves me.
  • jr1985
    jr1985 Posts: 1,033 Member
    Options
    Really? I've found the opposite to be true... I know way more girls who are willing to date guys that are out of shape, than guys who will date girls who are out of shape, regardless of what shape they themselves happen to be in.

    But most of the time People seem to date people who are mostly in their league... whether they want to or not.
  • lgreen37
    lgreen37 Posts: 196 Member
    Options
    I want a man that is cautious about his weight - no he does not have to be a buff dude but I do want him to be cautious. I'm not a skinny chick - but I eat right and I am very cautious of my weight. I want him to work out.
  • DonniesGirl69
    DonniesGirl69 Posts: 644 Member
    Options
    aka fat military wives because for some reason sitting at home doing nothing is harder than what their husbands do.

    I'll bet it's boring to be a military wife. No roots, no stability, no strong independent identity... It's not hard to see how someone could get depressed and overweight.

    I was a military wife and was fiercely independent. Maybe that's why I'm no longer a military wife. :wink:
    (or a wife at all, for that matter) LOL

Categories