News Anchor Stands up to Weight Bullying

tabinmaine

*Puts on flame proof suit*

In my opinion / experience, the only time I get upset when I get called out about my weight is because I know I'm not doing what I need to do to get in shape and I know it.

My "personal struggles" have always been me not eating right or not going to the gym, not saying that's the same for her case so put yer pitchforks away... But I've seen friends and also people on MFP accomplish a lot even with a number of medical conditions stacked against them.

It's all about how bad you want it. Her statements such as "If I could snap my fingers to be a size that I don't have to shop on the plus size rack that would be great" Livingstone said during the CBS interview. Wouldn't we all? Damn, if I had spent as much time working out in the gym as I did wasting time wishing that I could be fit and ripped then who knows... Maybe it'd actually would've happened faster than it's happening now. Wish in one hand, poo in the other and just see which one gets full first.

If you want to be complacent in your level of fitness or lack thereof, than so be it, but taking an e-mail out of context and sensationalizing it (something the media neeeeever does) is a bit extreme in my opinion.

As for him sending the e-mail, was it right for him to do it, I honestly don't know. I don't see it as him going out of his way to be rude or hurtful (though some here seem to think the e-mail was going out of his way), he didn't tell her that she needed to be a size 0 to be a broadcaster, and in his rebuttal to her national response to him, he said he'd still support her and offer her advice. He seemed generally concerned about the situation.

I just think the whole thing got blown out of proportion, I know that when I struggled (still am from time to time) I would've welcomed any advice on what to do to remedy the situation... Hell, I still need / want / am grateful for the advice that I get on here and on my friends list.

Through the whole thing, he didn't get dirty, or insulting or make blanket statements about all overweight people... He didn't even point out the stations foodie Youtube channel (http://www.youtube.com/user/StopLookinGetCookin) where they claim to be "A food blog that serves up simple food, inspiring ideas and connects with readers along the way." Yet all the food they seem to make is sugar dipped in sugar and frosted with sugar. Personally, now that I've changed my diet, I find that there's a lot more simple food that is easier and healthier than theirs.

With all that said, that's been my two cents based my personal experiences / opinions, flame away.

I agree 100% I will wear the flame suit with you !!

mikeschratz

Unfortunately, unhealthy choices manifest as physical appearance. Including her double-chin, thick waist, etc.

She may be a successful working mother of three - but she should focus on being there for her kids for as long as possible by improving her lifestyle. Hell - I bug my mom to exercise all the time, and I bug the rest of my family who eats fried food 90% of the time when it would be just as easy to grill.

I'm not suggesting she starve herself, and I'm not suggesting she go down to a size 0. But if she's obese according to her BMI, (as she says in the video) she is at greater risk for a majority of health problems which are preventable. She doesn't have to starve herself, but dropping the pint of Ben & Jerrys and eating a salad instead of a bucket of KFC for her lunch might do wonders toward improving her overall state of affairs.

I guess the overall point is that her appearance is her choice in a lot of ways - but her health is key and if she still looked the same after getting into a normal weight range I'd say more power to her. But if she's going to be a public figure and whine that pointing out her obesity is akin to pointing out the color of her skin or sexual orientation she's going off the wall worse than the guy who emailed her.

As for your point here: "Does it look like that tactic is working? "

Counterpoint: Look at what site you are on after all of that treatment in your youth.

I love the saying: YOU better be perfect before you judge me...
I too, judge people before taking a look at myself. But I am reminded daily that I am not perfect, and until I am, I have no right to judge others about what they lack in my perspective!
Live and let live... the choices I make today are my own and the consequences of those actions are what make my experiences. I hope that I am not so narrow minded at to think that I have the right to judge others that don't meet my "Expectations"....

KelliW_runner

She's a public figure. Like it or not, public figures are subject to all sorts of commentary and opinion about their lifestyle and presumed choices. Hollywood and the tabloids are much worse. Political figures get it all the time. Look at Chris Christie versus Paul Ryan in terms of the way the media treat them.

If you're going to be a public figure, grow some thick skin and don't whine about "bullying" because commentary on your lifestyle and appearance go with the territory.

rosecp05

You are so on point here. A person who would write such an email after only seeing a TV personality for a few minutes on the air probably has his own problems. Shaming is a terrible tactic that is used frequently by individuals with power and control issues. As for those who think her reaction is over the top, remember that she went on the air with her response after this took a life of its own on the internet. It became something of a neme. I think at that point she had to respond. She took the high road by not identifying the email's author. Good for her!

=====
"He is a bully. He is using a tactic called "shaming". It is especially hurtful in that he hides behind a veneer of concern for the school girls she is leading down the wrong road with her irresponsible weight management.

He doesn't ask her, or suggest, that it may be from an underlying health condition.

He doesn't offer to ASSIST her in making changes. For example, "I would like to offer my free personal training services and nutritional counseling which I hope can improve your life and offer inspiration for your viewers"

You see, there is no helping in criticism if you don't offer your hand to assist. Either mind your own business, or truly commit your time and energy to the cause you found so important you had to take out your time to write an email about someones "social irresponsibility".

I hope that readers that feel this email wasn't bullying reconsider the powerful tactic of shaming. Accusing someone of letting down others and themselves can spiral people into depression so deep they commit suicide.

It IS bullying...of the worst kind.
[/quote]

claw0416

Okay, I am still on the fence on this whole issue. I think in a way he did bully her for the simple fact he made it clear he does not watch her on the news, so he clearly was not a fan or supporter of her. He singled her out and emailed her with a crusade of concern on her weight. Why her? Why does he care what she does..Yes it is concerning since she is a public figure, but he doesn't even watch her..he singled her out..It may have been privately, but he did go to her. So on on that.. I do see it being a little like a bhully, his concern wasn't for her and wanting to see his new caster living healthy..In my OPINION he singled her out because she is over weight..

But I didn't see where his email was really rude..I think it would more hit a nerve with me,because he was not a fan, and just uped and emailed me to tell me I was over weight and needed to do something about it.. Go send moral support and encouragement to someone you actually like watching on tv..

My next thing..I believe she did say this morning on GMA that she has a Thyroid issue that does pose a challenge for keeping her weight under control..

And for the poster that she could not possibly be running 3 days a week.. Who are you to determine who can and can't possibly be running..We don't know her..Maybe she has been running and losing weight, but not making it public..Until you walk a mile in her shoes, don't judge her..

I am sure you will go onto my profile and then come back with something smart or rude to say. But seriously..Why do you think I am on MFP? I am not in denile..I am morbidly obese, should not have gotten this far, and definatly was not a positive role model for my kids..I am making that change now..For myself and my kids..I am not on this kick of the fat people need to stick together..blah blah..blah..I

I do think some good may have come out of that mans email and her news report though..It is one more step to make awareness of obesity, and bullying..What one feels is bullying another may not..Yes she has gotten alot of attention from it, but it has also shaken up alot of overweight people and heatlh people..It may motivate some..Look at what is has stirred up on here..

Just my two cents.......

ceannesjourney

Unfortunately, unhealthy choices manifest as physical appearance. Including her double-chin, thick waist, etc.

Unhealthy choices can manifest themselves in physical appearance. However, many unhealthy choices don't manifest themselves physically or they manifest themselves as society's desired traits -- i.e. many people treat their bodies terribly and are thin. Many people are thin because of the terrible way they treat their bodies. Look at all the thin people who post on here about their starvation tactics, fad diets, or diet drugs. People will do anything to be thin, whether it's healthy or not.

She may be a successful working mother of three - but she should focus on being there for her kids for as long as possible by improving her lifestyle. Hell - I bug my mom to exercise all the time, and I bug the rest of my family who eats fried food 90% of the time when it would be just as easy to grill.

How is it that you know so much about her lifestyle? You are making a lot of assumptions based on ONE piece of information. There is a difference between suggesting lifestyle changes to someone who's lifestyle you know something about and making judgments about a complete stranger about whom you know nothing.

I'm not suggesting she starve herself, and I'm not suggesting she go down to a size 0. But if she's obese according to her BMI, (as she says in the video) she is at greater risk for a majority of health problems which are preventable. She doesn't have to starve herself, but dropping the pint of Ben & Jerrys and eating a salad instead of a bucket of KFC for her lunch might do wonders toward improving her overall state of affairs.

Did you see her eating a bucket of KFC for lunch? Did you see here eating a pint of Ben and Jerry's? Do you know the last time she ate a salad? Again, how do you know this? I am obese by BMI standards and I haven't eaten fast food in years. Nor do I like ice cream. I also exercise regularly and walk everywhere. But you would look at me and judge me in the same, false, way that you are judging this woman.

I guess the overall point is that her appearance is her choice in a lot of ways - but her health is key and if she still looked the same after getting into a normal weight range I'd say more power to her. But if she's going to be a public figure and whine that pointing out her obesity is akin to pointing out the color of her skin or sexual orientation she's going off the wall worse than the guy who emailed her.

The whole "I am concerned for your health" is the biggest BS I've ever heard. I would prefer it if people would stick with "You are fat and I find that unattractive and therefore I am going to harass you about it" than have it covered in this veneer of "concern." Do you not notice how many young, thin, girls post on here asking about how they can starve themselves to be "healthy", stating that they are eating 800 calories a day because they need to be "healthy". Healthy is a word that has almost lost all meaning in the weight context. It has become a euphemism for thin just as unhealthy has become a euphemism for fat. Is this guy going to write to the thin anchors at that station to ask about their daily habits? Or is he just going to assume that anyone who is thin arrived that way by healthy habits?

As for your point here: "Does it look like that tactic is working? "

Counterpoint: Look at what site you are on after all of that treatment in your youth.

Wow. You completely missed my point with that. I am not on this site because judgmental jerks shamed me into wanting to lose weight. Quite the opposite. It is because I feel good about myself *despite* hateful ignorant jerks who think I eat a bucket of KFC every day that I am here. I look back at pictures of myself in high school and see a beautiful young girl who thought she was disgusting and worthless because she was a few pounds overweight and I wish I could go back and tell her different. Or that she had had a role model like that t.v. anchor -- someone to show her that she didn't have to be brought down by the ignorant bullies of the world, whether their hatred is manifest as straight up attacks or as "concern" for her "health."

You, my dear are AWESOME!!!

ceannesjourney

She's a public figure. Like it or not, public figures are subject to all sorts of commentary and opinion about their lifestyle and presumed choices. Hollywood and the tabloids are much worse. Political figures get it all the time. Look at Chris Christie versus Paul Ryan in terms of the way the media treat them.

If you're going to be a public figure, grow some thick skin and don't whine about "bullying" because commentary on your lifestyle and appearance go with the territory.

You obviously have not heard the whole story. She does have a thick skin and she didn't get upset about his comments about her size. What bothered her is that he said, he hardly ever watches her show, but saw a couple of minutes of it and decided to let her know she was not a good role model for young girls.

If he would have just said, "hey your fat, do something about it", she would not have said anything. But he attacked her character when he said that she was not a good role model.

How would you react if someone told you that you were not a good role model?

cmeade20

My thoughts on the matter

A. I don't think bullying is the right term. Had he sent multiple emails verbally attacking her even after she told him to stop I woul then say it crossed the line to bullying.

B. A lot of people are saying she's in the public eye she needs to expect these things. Yes thatt's true. However when you send an email to someone who has the means to draw attention to something at this level you need to also need to deal with it when there's a backlash. The girl may be an news anchor that doesn't mean she doesn't have he right to defend herself

C. I feel like increasingly people can't seem to mind their own damn business and it's irritating. Why does this guy care if she's overweight? MYOB for christ sake

and D. Since when does one have to be in shape to be a news anchor? I don't see it as a requirement.


Yes obesity is a big problem, but honestly we need to keep our noses out of other people's business and let people make their own choices. Like she said she knows she's overweight if she wants to change that she will.

BeautyFromPain

Great topic. Here's what I always think when I see stories like this: Do you think that person doesn't know how they look? Or how fat they are? Did the person writing in to her really think she didn't already know she was overweight?
And since I am not without my own failings, if I do find myself judging someone I try to always correct and think "Who the F*** am I? " When did I become better than anyone? What gives me the right to judge?
Always before you judge others think about how others might judge you. We all have our issues, we need to lift each other up, help each other out, not put each other down.

Just saying.. I avoided mirrors so much I didn't realise how much I had let myself go until I went shopping and had to go up clothing sizes.

Also, I think an overweight individual is a better role model than an anorexic role model.. or as airbrushed as they all are these days in their size 0 dresses.

jessalleyne

The person who wrote the email seemed respectful and concerned. If they had been talking about smoking the point would have been the same.

It isn't an "attack" or "bullying" to show concern for someone. He didn't say "Hey fatass!" or anything like that. He used very clinical terms even used by the FDA. She is right though - she's got very thick skin - but not metaphorically.

I look in the mirror when I'm lifting weights and call myself a fatass if I think about giving up before finishing my planned sets.

A large majority of my region of the country is obese. I wish more people would point it out.

Although I agree that our country has an obesity issue, I think what stuck out to me is that she points out that the person writing the email knows nothing about her. She may have other health issues that she's facing - she might have recently lost 10 pounds and is working at it - there is a human there who the email author knows nothing about. The email author had more concern over how her image was impacting others than who or how she was. And this is the problem. We are overly concerned with image - and not people. That is bullying. Even though he was polite - he wasn't her friend and he didn't care really about her. We need to care about each other & ourselves - to be healthy, not skinny.

mensasu

I might feel better about all of this if I knew that this *concerned* person was also writing to all the anorexic and almost anorexic men and women on TV, in movies and magazines with the same concern about their health and bad influence as a role model. Or maybe the smokers, partiers, "drunk drivers", etc. Yes celebrities are under the spotlight and need thick skin, but there are many bad role models out there. I'm sure he has a anti-fat bias which wikipedia does a decent job on describing: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-fat_bias

rodneyderrick

The email didn't mention anything about beauty or attractiveness. People are putting their own misguided thoughts into the email. I'm sure he talked about being a role model, health, and things like that in the email.

redbird99

Blech.

That was disappointing. Nothing stated in the email was false or cruel or bullying. The dude who wrote it sure is a moron.....but morons say stupid things all the time. I'm really disappointed this turned into some issue it isn't and this woman is being praised. She went off way more than the guy who wrote the email did. She was the bully here, actually.....

Agree...


He sent a private email with comments voicing his opinion. Not bullying. Since when is commenting about something "bullying" - can people not state their opinions anymore? She made his private comment to her public, and is continuing to whip it up into a media frenzy. She IS the "bully", in this case!

Alpina483

We are overly concerned with image - and not people. That is bullying.

No, that is not.

IveLanded

You obviously have not heard the whole story. She does have a thick skin and she didn't get upset about his comments about her size. What bothered her is that he said, he hardly ever watches her show, but saw a couple of minutes of it and decided to let her know she was not a good role model for young girls.

Did YOU watch the video? It was really........immature. She CLEARLY was bothered by what he said and she was OBVIOUSLY really upset and angry about it. And that was a weird and inappropriate way to address it.

WendyTerry420

Woo! Thread #6 of the same topic!

:laugh:

And yet here we are again....reading through the same crap! :drinker:

ascotton80

So it would be okay if he said to an tv anchor - your teeth have a gap go see a dentist or your roots are showing go see a hairstylist or that mole looks cancerous go see a doctor or you got big boobs get them reduced and I could go on. Sorry but judging others that way just seems wrong to me.

Teeth gaps and roots are not health issues.

And if someone had a mole that I thought they should get checked out I would mention it, that is not judging.

That being said, the letter was jerkish.

SyStEmPhReAk

to continue to beat this horse to a bloody pulp...

in my OPINION, she just put herself in a no-win situation... Just two thoughts to consider...

IF SHE:

(a) decides to lose weight at some point - you'd really have to reevaluate the "bullying" aspect of the email. i mean, couldn't his email then be seen as a positive message that motivated her to lose weight? making the public airing of this just a waste of time?

(b) stays at the same weight or gets heavier, then she puts herself at the risk of developing all of the health issues associated with her (self admitted) obesity.

That's what i think at least...

AbsoluteNG

http://www.eonline.com/news/351121/why-jennifer-livingston-wasn-t-bullied-and-benedict-cumberbatch-is-evil

David ****son, chairman of the Bullying Prevention Initiative of California. "Bullying, normally, is what someone, in a very mean spirited way, continually and on a repeated basis, does to another person, typically in a social setting in front of other people…It was a stupid letter he wrote, but he commented privately."

.

AbsoluteNG

Long post to read below so I'll point out the part I find most interesting. The post is from a former TV news anchor who said Livingston is the real bully for exposing a private email to the public.


http://www.monstersandcritics.com/smallscreen/news/article_1704519.php/TV-anchor-Jennifer-Livingston-needs-help-not-bullied-says-noted-bariatric-surgeon

Well said, Dr. Liu, I applaude you!

I'm a former TV news anchor myself, and I actually took the time to write a comment and left it on the FB page for WKBT-TV/Jennifer Livingston (see a copy of my comment below).

Guess what? My comment was deleted within less than an hour of me posting it there. What does that tell us? Ms. Livingston (and her husband, Mike Thompson - who was the first to illegally post the private email online, without the sender's consent!) should both be fired from their respective jobs, because their behaviour violates everything you hold dear as an ethical journalist. Both of them are a disgrace to our profession!
And Jennifer L. also seems to enjoy her little private vendetta against her alleged "bully" - when by definition the only bullies are she and her husband! And WKBT-TV, her employer, letting her run with this bogus bully-spin just to get ratings....

MY COMMENT (as I posted it):

Having been a TV news anchor myself, I can certainly attest to this: if you are working in the public eye you WILL get critique (positive as well as negative) for how you look, or behave et cetera. And pretty much nothing is off limits for some people (unfortunately). And if that bothers you, please QUIT YOUR JOB (and work in an back office where you are not running ANY chances of being exposed to this). Fact of life, and my own experience. BTW, let me quote Nietzsche: "What doesn't kill us, makes us stronger!"
That being said, here are my 2 cents:
+ Mr. Krause's (private) email was condescending, unsolicited and not "nice", but true and NOT bullying in any way.+ Mrs. Livingston's response (made possible by her employer, WKBT-TV) WAS bullying because she took a privately sent email and PUBLICLY exposed the sender's name (without his consent, I would assume) - which is literally one of the most deadly sins a(n actual) journalist can commit (and yes, that means that she is IMO not a journalist). To be frank, and without knowing anything about Mrs. L.'s career background, I highly doubt she learned journalism from the ground up anyway - seeing how dilettantish she handled this whole situation.+ In my humble opinion she blew this whole incident totally out of proportion, and (with the help of her husband and her employer, WBKT-TV) tried to turn this into a "news" story ("dear viewers, bullying week is coming up": my *kitten* - talking about "giving it a spin")!!! Bad journalism, and self-righteousness at its best, Mrs. Livingston. Bravo! + If your ego gets hurt because a viewer sends you an disapproving email lecture, you are WRONG for this job. As simple as that!+ Fact is: Mrs. L. is fat (or highly obese - whatever word you prefer). But (sorry to have to point this out) if you are promoting drinking beer/Oktoberfest and similar life style choices on your PUBLIC social media page, one might just come to think you did "invite" viewers like Mr. Krause to call you (in a PRIVATE email) out on your weight... - or not?!
If I would have been in Mrs. L.'s situation, here is how I would have handled the situation: I would have picked up the phone, called the sender of this email (after having my assistant research his phone #) - and invited him to come into the TV station to do an interview with me, discussing his email and the underlying issue (obesity, and being a role for children and others). Heck, I even would have put in a request to have Michelle Obama and Rosie O'Donnell JOIN us for the segment!
Done right, this would have shown you are not only the bigger person (and human, honest, as well as self-confident!)... but it also would have actually been a great opportunity to educate viewers of any age about the challenges and rewards in battling obesity. Plus, you Mrs. Livingston, would have come out of this smelling like roses all around.
Right now, as it is, your reaction to Mr. Krause's email only shows that his critique most of all put a big dent in your ego (understandably so)... but does that mean you have to publicly take a sledgehammer to crack a nut? Absolutely not. Very disgraceful, and not worthy of your (very public) job and all that it entails.
PS. ...and just in case I misspelled or incorrectly used any expressions/quotes et cetera: English is unfortunately not my first language. But I appreciate any and all critique to help me improve it (and I simply don't care if your comment is condescending or not)! Promise....

astrampe

Is sooooooo tired of hearing about this.... she just can't let it go and is becoming famous because of it. BULLYING MY *kitten* !!
I just heard that she runs 3x a week .......suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure she does BAHAHAHAHAHA

This....except that she might be running - I ran FOUR times a week when I was obese, and nobody would say it when looking at me for 10 minutes....But yeah, she's definitely looking for attention, otherwise she could have answered him via email or ignored him...

2012asv

Thanks for sharing, that was interesting.

KelliW_runner

She's a public figure. Like it or not, public figures are subject to all sorts of commentary and opinion about their lifestyle and presumed choices. Hollywood and the tabloids are much worse. Political figures get it all the time. Look at Chris Christie versus Paul Ryan in terms of the way the media treat them.

If you're going to be a public figure, grow some thick skin and don't whine about "bullying" because commentary on your lifestyle and appearance go with the territory.

You obviously have not heard the whole story. She does have a thick skin and she didn't get upset about his comments about her size. What bothered her is that he said, he hardly ever watches her show, but saw a couple of minutes of it and decided to let her know she was not a good role model for young girls.

If he would have just said, "hey your fat, do something about it", she would not have said anything. But he attacked her character when he said that she was not a good role model.

How would you react if someone told you that you were not a good role model?

You missed the point entirely. If someone is a public figure, they are up for all sorts of commentary, regardless of whether the person offering it has any knowledge of the situation whatsoever. All sorts of people who don't know Marissa Mayer (pregnant Yahoo CEO, had her baby) are attacking her as a role model and making comments that she looks too thin.

Doesn't matter what the issue is - too fat, too thin, drinks too much, too much makeup, dresses too nice, dresses too sloppy, has cellulite - the media and many people are quick to judge and offer commentary over situations they know nothing about.

If you're going to have a career in the public eye, be prepared for the comments that come with the territory. And if you're shocked by the comments from the public or the media - then you were pretty naive in the first place.

peachyxoxoxo

The email came across as polite but subtly passive aggressive in my opinion. Whenever someone calls out a public figure on their weight it's almost always because they don't look how people think they "should," not about how healthy they are. Like someone else said, she could go home and eat next to nothing on some super restrictive diet and she'd be slimmer. But if she was a normal weight, no one would make any comments on her weight. Without having any idea how that weight was being maintained. I'm a normal weight and people would probably look at me and think I look healthy, when in reality, I've struggled with bulimia for a year.

redheaddee

It sounds to me like the letter, although offensive to the anchor, had good intentions. The man who wrote the email has an absolutely valid point. She is very overweight, and although we do not know if she has any health conditions that could affect her weight, she has a career in a visual art. I think she took it well out of proportion in calling it "bullying". Yes, he made a judgement based on her appearance, but hellooo...she is a TV anchor. For someone who was not hurt by his words, she sure made a big deal out of it.

The guy went out of his way to write to her, of course it's bullying. Do you think she should quit her job until she loses weight? You're as bad as the dumb**se who wrote to her.

No I don't. I think she should get the frack over it. If sending an email is bullying, than so is your response to my opinion. He's an *kitten*, she's a crybaby, and you're an idiot. :sad: :sad:

lljksilk

After re-reading the thread, and reading the information about the guy I sort of thought about it and feel a little differently.

1. The guy wasn't being a bully, but his email was somewhat tactless and should have included what he did in his post-shaming statement.
2. The news anchor was being a crybaby about it and was butt-hurt and decided to bully the guy on-air using her position, when she could have just as easily used her position to show a makeover as the guy suggested. She could have taken the high road and done what normal people would do - delete the email and forget about it or act on it in private.

This morning I read a news story about a man who saved a family of 3 from a car that had gone off the road and submerged. As soon as the rescue personnel arrived, he left the scene and didn't try to take credit or make a scene about it. If he didn't need accolades for what many would call an act of heroism - she doesn't need to grandstand on her high horse about how bullying makes her eat and eating makes her fat which makes her get bullied or whatever her point was. It was tactless and shameful on her part, much more than the guy's email was.

Overall, people who are obese need to understand that discussing their weight isn't always a metaphor for "You don't look how I think you should!"

After dealing with obesity in my family and personally, I became much more health conscious. When I mention my feelings toward someone who is overweight, my heart is really focused on them being in a healthier situation so that their quality of life is better. The fact that they "look" fat is incidental.