The hardest thing about dating...
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Putting myself out there. I'm so shy...0
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Staying true to myself and falling into traps that lead to self-sabotage. It's the "OMG!-this-guy-is-so-amazing-and-I must-keep-him-because-he-says-he-likes-me" syndrome. In reality, the guy is not so amazing. I just want him to be. This is why I am on a break from dating. I have to learn to be better to myself so I can attract a better caliber of guy. Doormats attract *kitten*.
Yeah I have fallen into that trap before. Its good to take time to step back and reevaluate the situation.0 -
getting out of bed quietly in the morning making to the car before she wakes up :laugh:
I don't even wait for him to fall asleep before I leave... but that isn't the dating I was talking about
I'm confused then0 -
i hate this! why do people hide away in their little portable devices??? gah so annoying! like sometimes i can't even say hi to a girl because she's on her cell phone the whole time. (not talking btw)Putting myself out there. I'm so shy...0 -
For the guys who are shy, nervous around woman and can't seem to find a "date" for that reason. I wrote this on another thread, but deserves to be here too:
I remember being awkward, shy, nervous, worried, sweaty when being approached or approaching a girl.
It took practice, but I managed to change myself(primarily after getting dumped by my ex.) Although I was always assured of myself and had some sense of humor.
Be confident. When I say this I mean don't have your head down when she looks at you, have something to say if she talks to you. Do you see a girl that you like? THEN APPROACH HER. Woman want the best, so be the best you can be. Showcase your swagger. You have value, why does she deserve you?
Dress proper. Looks don't really matter, but if you're wearing something like it came out of your parents class of 79' photo then chances are you crapped the bed. Doesn't mean to wear prada, gucci and $200 cologne. I like vnecks, skinny jeans, toms for casual. Button down/cardigan for clubbing. Still trimming down to get into blazers.
No girl is special. LEARN TO GET REJECTED. Deal with it. Ask yourself what happened, how I can do better and MOVE ON.
Don't put her on a pedestal. She's not the end all be all. Your life doesn't revolve around her.
Practice. Talk to girls. This isn't something that we are born with. It takes time, trial and error. When I mean talk to a girl, I don't mean talk to some girl that you want - right away. I mean talk to the cashier, bank teller, movie attendant, barista, classmate. Build yourself up so you don't get as nervous and transform yourself to a more seductive, charming man. It DOESN'T happen overnight just like a healthy life style. Elevate your social skills. Go somewhere where your attributes can be noticed and feel more comfortable at first. Smart? Library. Buff? Beach. Dancer? Club. Musician? Concerts/Live bands.
Body Language. Look at her directly, not like a criminal, but with some suave, don't put your hands in your pockets, smile, have good posture(straight, elbows back)
Talking to her: Be cool. Now I don't mean having the latest apple product. I mean be assertive of yourself, be calm, relaxed, nice, fun, open to new things. This is where confidence really comes into play. This is where your mindset should be saying you're the man, and she's lucky to be talking to you NOT the opposite. Get her to talk. Lead on conversations(making sure you're in control), don't let her stop, unless she asks you a question then you answer it and follow up with another question. A good opener is always helpful. Make her laugh. Backhand compliments are great if you know how to use them. Being an *kitten* helps. Woman enjoy an *kitten* opinion and thoughts because they don't always correspond to theirs and it creates sparks. I don't mean be a ****, I mean be playful. Listen to what she has to say. LISTEN. LISTEN. That's how you have a conversation and follow up on things. Store something she has said and keep it with you. Mention it later on. Woman love that. Stop talking about yourself. Stop bragging. Have flow in your conversation. If she's talking about dogs, don't mention your friends dog died. NO. STOP. I like to mention my name in the end, adds mystery.
Make sure she's interested. Eye contact. Eye contact. EYE CONTACT. Chances are if she's looked at you a couple times, she's looking for you to talk to her. Girls don't show interest like men. They're subtle. If she's playing with her hair. If she's smiled, a comment, etc. Okay you've now talked to her for a while and it's going well? Don't know if she's willing to give you her number/ interested in you? Few things to look out for... Leaning towards you, starts asking you tons of questions, blushing, tone of voice, posture. You can go for the kill by getting close saying something, if she doesn't reject what you said go for a kiss. If she does reject you. Chin up. Sometimes even with all of these hints she could just be an attention *kitten* or a tease. There's more out there.
Again don't be desperate, kiss *kitten*, try too hard, and being scared of who you're naturally supposed to be - a man.
Most importantly be yourself. Be comfortable with who you are. Do some soul searching. Don't live someone else's life. Don't make it all about someone that can hurt you, mistreat, you and eventually break you. Have self-respect. Love yourself because you are so ****ing worth it.0 -
Putting myself out there. I'm so shy...
your really cute in the pic you can get over being shy by just talking to people0 -
Meeting a confident guy, there are way too many insecure men0
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getting out of bed quietly in the morning making to the car before she wakes up :laugh:
I don't even wait for him to fall asleep before I leave... but that isn't the dating I was talking about
I'm confused then
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I think I like you
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finding a date.
hahahaha
but for real...
Same here...0 -
finding a date.
hahahaha
but for real...
This^0 -
The hardest thing about dating....
My husband doesnt like when I do it. *shrugs*
:laugh:
edited for typo. lol0 -
Finding a guy who is honest ... or one wanting to commiitt... I had a date tonight we planned it all week... and I got ready waitied for him to call nothing I texted 3 xs nothing... rude rude.. if you dont wanna go just say so simple.. ya know ... dont stand me up!0
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Finding Opie Winston in actual-person form.0
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I agree with all the single parents - it's almost impossible to find a time that isn't already packed with lessons, sports or just being there for your kids. And when I get a moment that isn't taken up by any of the above, I need time to just sit and breathe!
It also doesn't help that I work in a clinic that is staffed entirely with women (oh wait, 3 married guys) and that my circle of friends is made up of mostly couples.
And although I've been encouraged to try dating websites it just is way too hard for me to trust that what guys are putting out there is honest.
Because obviously I have no problem being honest with who I am. My profile pic is proof of that.0 -
Definitely the putting myself out there not just in the meeting of guys,
but once I actually found someone I'm interested in and HE'S asked me out ( because i'm way to shy to ever be the first to ask/hit on a guy), then to continue putting myself out there and opening myself to the possibility of being love and loving in return. My wall is high and super thick. Sometimes I really feel like an emotionless being when I'm with a guy who's pouring out his heart and soul to me and I know I can trust him, but all i give back is a "thank you", or a nervous giggle, or some sarcastic comment that evades the topic.0 -
I had the same issue as above. Since I have been on my journey, beginning November 2011, I have made HUGE strides in all areas. I began dating people and I realize now that I can be more discerning about who I choose to date. It feels good to be honest, blunt and to say NO to guys I have honestly assessed as not "keepers". I am actively dating, never did that in my entire life. The hardest part, honestly, is finding a guy that is worth giving up "me" time for.... I cherish MY time, whether it be sleeping in, window shopping, or working out/going to the gym... I come first... I know it sounds selfish, but I put everyone before me my whole life and it got me fat, depressed, miserable and perpetually single.... So, now I am number one... All else falls below that!Staying true to myself and falling into traps that lead to self-sabotage. It's the "OMG!-this-guy-is-so-amazing-and-I must-keep-him-because-he-says-he-likes-me" syndrome. In reality, the guy is not so amazing. I just want him to be. This is why I am on a break from dating. I have to learn to be better to myself so I can attract a better caliber of guy. Doormats attract *kitten*.
Yeah I have fallen into that trap before. Its good to take time to step back and reevaluate the situation.0 -
That stinks!Finding a guy who is honest ... or one wanting to commiitt... I had a date tonight we planned it all week... and I got ready waitied for him to call nothing I texted 3 xs nothing... rude rude.. if you dont wanna go just say so simple.. ya know ... dont stand me up!0 -
When I did shift work it was hard because I was always working funny hours.
Now I'm in a long term relationship the hardest part about date nights is........finding a sitter, finding the energy.
I hope you find your knight in shining armor :flowerforyou:0 -
Putting myself out there. I'm so shy...
Same.0 -
Finding a ball gag that fits him.0
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