Living together AFTER marriage....

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  • laarae
    laarae Posts: 332 Member
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    I think it's so funny when we teach our childrens that when you get married everything is "peaches/cream and roses" BULL$H!T-it is work to make a marriage work-everyday. I have been married 26 years and I and he have had to work at it-but we have not given up-we have been through a DUI ($10,000 cost for that mistake of his), cancer, 5 children, bankruptcy, him developing diabetes, deaths of our parents....many, many other things. We live today in such a "throw-away" society that it seems its easier to throw it away than to fix it. I must be too old school for that
    Well that's just fantastic for you.
    I really hope someday if I've been married I have a happier disposition to show for it.


    Again you like most missed the point of this thread, it was kind of a spoof.
    Yep I must have missed the spoof part.
  • XtyAnn17
    XtyAnn17 Posts: 632 Member
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    Yea. I'm *this* close to kicking the husband out.


    He snores and steals the covers. That's grounds for divorce.

    I snore & steal the covers... am I out too?

    Becauseof this i use my own blanket
  • Bentley2718
    Bentley2718 Posts: 1,690 Member
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    I think it's so funny when we teach our childrens that when you get married everything is "peaches/cream and roses" BULL$H!T-it is work to make a marriage work-everyday.

    My parents taught me no such thing. Quite the opposite in fact, my parents taught me, by example, how crappy marriage can be when it's not working.
  • laarae
    laarae Posts: 332 Member
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    Yep I must have missed the spoof part.:laugh:
  • Heather_Rider
    Heather_Rider Posts: 1,159 Member
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    I love being married, and I hope that if GOD FORBID something happens that we are ever forced to be divorced for some reason (because it wont be because we arent in love anymore) that we can still live together.. because for us, it is all peaches & cream! :heart: I dont believe its "work" to keep a marrige happy & strong. I believe once you get over the bumps in the beginning of your relationship that ALL relationships go through.. learning each other, gaining trust, teaching each other about how to respect each other & what each other needs, ect.. (which should be done BEFORE you get married...) then it shouldnt be work at all! (that is if neither person does something stupid to screw it up....

    Maybe im old school or whatever, but I was raised in this environment & so was my husband that you respect and care about the other with every ounce of love in your body... and I guess it rubbed off on both of us. You give and do for the other person as if its the last time you could ever do for them. When my husband works night shift, i get up at 4am out of bed, and i cook him a complete hot meal. when he works days.. and i just dont feel like doing it.. he will work 18 hours, and come home, start laundry, and cook dinner for our family. its about loving each other, and not "expecting" something from the other person, but wanting to do as much as possible for the other at all times. *shrugs* its just the way we work. lol... people tease us and say that there are NO two people more spoiled in the entire world... and they are probably right!
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,780 Member
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    I love being married, and I hope that if GOD FORBID something happens that we are ever forced to be divorced for some reason (because it wont be because we arent in love anymore) that we can still live together.. because for us, it is all peaches & cream! :heart: I dont believe its "work" to keep a marrige happy & strong. I believe once you get over the bumps in the beginning of your relationship that ALL relationships go through.. learning each other, gaining trust, teaching each other about how to respect each other & what each other needs, ect.. (which should be done BEFORE you get married...) then it shouldnt be work at all! (that is if neither person does something stupid to screw it up....

    Maybe im old school or whatever, but I was raised in this environment & so was my husband that you respect and care about the other with every ounce of love in your body... and I guess it rubbed off on both of us. You give and do for the other person as if its the last time you could ever do for them. When my husband works night shift, i get up at 4am out of bed, and i cook him a complete hot meal. when he works days.. and i just dont feel like doing it.. he will work 18 hours, and come home, start laundry, and cook dinner for our family. its about loving each other, and not "expecting" something from the other person, but wanting to do as much as possible for the other at all times. *shrugs* its just the way we work. lol... people tease us and say that there are NO two people more spoiled in the entire world... and they are probably right!

    so.. is that "yes" or "no" to hibbity-bibbity if you decide to live with him in the (unlikely) event the marriage ends?
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
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    I love being married, and I hope that if GOD FORBID something happens that we are ever forced to be divorced for some reason (because it wont be because we arent in love anymore) that we can still live together.. because for us, it is all peaches & cream! :heart: I dont believe its "work" to keep a marrige happy & strong. I believe once you get over the bumps in the beginning of your relationship that ALL relationships go through.. learning each other, gaining trust, teaching each other about how to respect each other & what each other needs, ect.. (which should be done BEFORE you get married...) then it shouldnt be work at all! (that is if neither person does something stupid to screw it up....

    Maybe im old school or whatever, but I was raised in this environment & so was my husband that you respect and care about the other with every ounce of love in your body... and I guess it rubbed off on both of us. You give and do for the other person as if its the last time you could ever do for them. When my husband works night shift, i get up at 4am out of bed, and i cook him a complete hot meal. when he works days.. and i just dont feel like doing it.. he will work 18 hours, and come home, start laundry, and cook dinner for our family. its about loving each other, and not "expecting" something from the other person, but wanting to do as much as possible for the other at all times. *shrugs* its just the way we work. lol... people tease us and say that there are NO two people more spoiled in the entire world... and they are probably right!

    I LOVE THIS! :) THis honestly made my day.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
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    I love being married, and I hope that if GOD FORBID something happens that we are ever forced to be divorced for some reason (because it wont be because we arent in love anymore) that we can still live together.. because for us, it is all peaches & cream! :heart: I dont believe its "work" to keep a marrige happy & strong. I believe once you get over the bumps in the beginning of your relationship that ALL relationships go through.. learning each other, gaining trust, teaching each other about how to respect each other & what each other needs, ect.. (which should be done BEFORE you get married...) then it shouldnt be work at all! (that is if neither person does something stupid to screw it up....

    Maybe im old school or whatever, but I was raised in this environment & so was my husband that you respect and care about the other with every ounce of love in your body... and I guess it rubbed off on both of us. You give and do for the other person as if its the last time you could ever do for them. When my husband works night shift, i get up at 4am out of bed, and i cook him a complete hot meal. when he works days.. and i just dont feel like doing it.. he will work 18 hours, and come home, start laundry, and cook dinner for our family. its about loving each other, and not "expecting" something from the other person, but wanting to do as much as possible for the other at all times. *shrugs* its just the way we work. lol... people tease us and say that there are NO two people more spoiled in the entire world... and they are probably right!

    so.. is that "yes" or "no" to hibbity-bibbity if you decide to live with him in the (unlikely) event the marriage ends?
    Well in my case there was no hibbity bibbity. In fact I wanted to throw up once when he bumped into me. lol
  • fcp1234
    fcp1234 Posts: 1,098 Member
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    I love being married, and I hope that if GOD FORBID something happens that we are ever forced to be divorced for some reason (because it wont be because we arent in love anymore) that we can still live together.. because for us, it is all peaches & cream! :heart: I dont believe its "work" to keep a marrige happy & strong. I believe once you get over the bumps in the beginning of your relationship that ALL relationships go through.. learning each other, gaining trust, teaching each other about how to respect each other & what each other needs, ect.. (which should be done BEFORE you get married...) then it shouldnt be work at all! (that is if neither person does something stupid to screw it up....

    Maybe im old school or whatever, but I was raised in this environment & so was my husband that you respect and care about the other with every ounce of love in your body... and I guess it rubbed off on both of us. You give and do for the other person as if its the last time you could ever do for them. When my husband works night shift, i get up at 4am out of bed, and i cook him a complete hot meal. when he works days.. and i just dont feel like doing it.. he will work 18 hours, and come home, start laundry, and cook dinner for our family. its about loving each other, and not "expecting" something from the other person, but wanting to do as much as possible for the other at all times. *shrugs* its just the way we work. lol... people tease us and say that there are NO two people more spoiled in the entire world... and they are probably right!

    Im too lazy to read it all. But yea I am jealous.
  • diadojikohei
    diadojikohei Posts: 732 Member
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    I have been married for almost 25 years. We have only lived together for 11.5 years!! We have 4 children, who are all perfectly happy with the arrangement. Hubby was military, then worked for a US based company then an Indian one. I love having the time to myself!
    Living together after marriage is seriously over rated!!
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
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    Nah. Vastly overrated. All the fun's gone now the marriage is an actuality.. Do a runner and start off somewhere else under a different name. Start again. I have been doing this for 45 years.

    I'm usually pretty quick, but I have no idea what in the name of Ben and Jerry this means.

    I think someone was using talk to text on their phone and posted it here.
  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
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    My house would be cleaner, the bread would be fresher, the towels wouldn't be found in the garage with car grease all over them... if we didn't live together after marriage... :wink:
  • homerjspartan
    homerjspartan Posts: 1,893 Member
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    only if we're still allowed to do the hibbity-bibbity

    Do you get to do it AFTER if you don't do it during? I mean we've been consistently doing it every 6th Tuesday of the month for about 10 years now......I don't have blue balls, mine are a flourescent glowing aqua.
  • IrishMc
    IrishMc Posts: 24 Member
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    Yea. I'm *this* close to kicking the husband out.


    He snores and steals the covers. That's grounds for divorce.

    One acronym - CPAP. Won't help with the blanket situ, but we wouldn't still be living together after marriage if he hadn't finally started using one:noway:
  • msafunk
    msafunk Posts: 163 Member
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    I lived with my Ex for about 3 months after I ended the relationship, and I was dating the guy I left him for. He hated my guts, but I didn't care-- He treated the cats better than he treated me while we were still 'together.' We weren't married, but we had been together for just over 5 years, and living together for 4.

    I would have moved out right away, but it was a nice apartment, and he and our room mate had to get good enough jobs to take over the rent without me (I was the breadwinner of the household).
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,780 Member
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    only if we're still allowed to do the hibbity-bibbity

    Do you get to do it AFTER if you don't do it during? I mean we've been consistently doing it every 6th Tuesday of the month for about 10 years now......I don't have blue balls, mine are a flourescent glowing aqua.

    I think yes --especially if you don't do it during.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    I think divorce rates are high because people move in together after marriage!

    I think you need to take a look at the relationship between divorce rates and the prevalence of couples living together before marriage. You will find exactly the opposite of what you have described.
  • 1ConcreteGirl
    1ConcreteGirl Posts: 3,677 Member
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    Such a bad idea. I know many people who have lived together after marriage and a number of them are now divorced, paying child support, and/or entirely jaded about the idea of post-marital cohabitation.

    Clearly, it is a direct cause of divorce and family tragedy. Think of the children!
  • msafunk
    msafunk Posts: 163 Member
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    I think divorce rates are high because people move in together after marriage!

    I think you need to take a look at the relationship between divorce rates and the prevalence of couples living together before marriage. You will find exactly the opposite of what you have described.

    And then you have to realize that people who are against "living in sin" are also more likely to not believe in divorce, so the statistics are completely irrelevant.
  • msafunk
    msafunk Posts: 163 Member
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    Wait... Have only, like, 3 people understood that this thread is about living with your Ex after the divorce or breakup?

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