The Right Guy
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If you aren't losing the weight for you (internal motivation) - for the sake of pride or liking your reflection in the mirror - the external motivations will fade (male attention, approval/praise from others.) It's okay to want those other things, but you'll be happier if you're doing it for yourself.
To be honest, PART of the reason I wanted to get fit was to be more attractive; but I got fed up being so fat. lol I'm not where I want to be, but I'm seeing getting there, feel more confident and have noticed more women are interested/attracted - but I'm not looking right now because my health is top priority right now.0 -
Hold on to that feeeeeelin......street lights, people oooooooohooooohhhhhhhhhh!!!! \m/Don't Stop Believin'0 -
Allow me to play devil's advocate for a moment: the OP's ticker does indicate she's about 50 lbs from her goal. Maybe he's just congratulating her on her success so far and encouraging her to continue and not give up.
Huh? Wha?!good progress , 50 lbs more
I was just fixing to say something similar, but you were much kinder than I was going to be. What a jerk! :mad:
And if he's just a jerk, you can easily say the same thing back to him, as his ticker indicates he is also about 50 lbs from his goal, but he's only lost 8 lbs to her 50...0 -
First off... I don't think "Mr. Right" is real. At least I haven't met him.
But... I gotta say... I think that when I (and you) start doing this for ourselves... and start liking ourselves... than he may appear. Just a thought.0 -
After a bad breakup last year I read the book "He's just not that into you"
I've been single ever since....and now it's quite comfortable to be honest
No drama, no stress, I come and go as I please and can hang out with my guy friends whenever I feel like it.
Why rush?? It's not all it's cracked up to be anyways0 -
People who try too hard rarely get what they want.
Do this for YOU. Your confidence will be oozing from your body, and you will attract the right guy eventually.0 -
Even if he isn't talking about himself, the OP's goal is apparently another 50 lbs, so I don't see what the big deal is.good progress , 50 lbs more
Congrats, you're a *kitten*
Woahhh and here we have an example of girls jumping to conclusions!...If you look at hit ticker...it looks like he has 50 pounds to go...I'm pretty sure he was talking about himself.0 -
Allow me to play devil's advocate for a moment: the OP's ticker does indicate she's about 50 lbs from her goal. Maybe he's just congratulating her on her success so far and encouraging her to continue and not give up.
Huh? Wha?!good progress , 50 lbs more
I was just fixing to say something similar, but you were much kinder than I was going to be. What a jerk! :mad:
And if he's just a jerk, you can easily say the same thing back to him, as his ticker indicates he is also about 50 lbs from his goal, but he's only lost 8 lbs to her 50...
Yea I gotta back gingerjen up on this one.....
Men aren't as stupid as some women like to believe and they can spot that bitter woman a mile away.....sooooo yea0 -
OH sweetie, I understand what you're feeling because I'm fighting the same battle but I've come to this conclusion: EFF IT! Love yourself. Bask in your beauty. Feel your own self worth. Treat yourself well. Know yourself well. Live your life to it's fullest. Treat yourself AND OTHERS with respect always. Be open to life & it's opportunities. Don't wait for love but do what you love! Love will come knocking when it knows your truly ready. Until then - LIVE! xo :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
Very well written. :flowerforyou:0 -
Saying "good progress, 50 lbs more" is rude nowdays?
edit: if someone weights 400, and lost 100lbs, is it MORE rude to say , good progress , 150lbs more. ?0 -
wait what.....
are you interested in the "RIGHT GUY" or interested in all guys "But it still seems to me that guys aren't interested in me"
cause the right guy takes time.....it'll happen....
but any guy? sometimes they are noticing, you just don't notice them noticing...
this right herr0 -
Saying "good progress, 50 lbs more" is rude nowdays?
edit: if someone weights 400, and lost 100lbs, is it MORE rude to say , good progress , 150lbs more. ?
OH NO HE DIDDDDENNNNT!!!!
Get em girls!0 -
I understood what you meant, but perhaps you can't see what other people think you meant. The topic of the OP's post is a perceived lack of interest in her from men. Your comment may be taken by others to mean, "Well, you're still fat, lose another 50 lbs and then guys will notice you." It could come across to others that you're being incredibly shallow and glossing over her accomplishment and focusing on the work she has left to do.Saying "good progress, 50 lbs more" is rude nowdays?
edit: if someone weights 400, and lost 100lbs, is it MORE rude to say , good progress , 150lbs more. ?0 -
I understood what you meant, but perhaps you can't see what other people think you meant. The topic of the OP's post is a perceived lack of interest in her from men. Your comment may be taken by others to mean, "Well, you're still fat, lose another 50 lbs and then guys will notice you." It could come across to others that you're being incredibly shallow and glossing over her accomplishment and focusing on the work she has left to do.Saying "good progress, 50 lbs more" is rude nowdays?
edit: if someone weights 400, and lost 100lbs, is it MORE rude to say , good progress , 150lbs more. ?
It is sad we can get negative feedback, but the more you converse, the more power you give them. It's nice to defend, but sometimes you gotta let it go, and it(he/she) will usually go away too. There's also something called "ignore" option0 -
If he were worth the time.....Yeah, I would. ....I KNEW IT! :mad:Saying "good progress, 50 lbs more" is rude nowdays?
edit: if someone weights 400, and lost 100lbs, is it MORE rude to say , good progress , 150lbs more. ?
OH NO HE DIDDDDENNNNT!!!!
Get em girls!0 -
Allow me to play devil's advocate for a moment: the OP's ticker does indicate she's about 50 lbs from her goal. Maybe he's just congratulating her on her success so far and encouraging her to continue and not give up.
Huh? Wha?!good progress , 50 lbs more
I was just fixing to say something similar, but you were much kinder than I was going to be. What a jerk! :mad:
And if he's just a jerk, you can easily say the same thing back to him, as his ticker indicates he is also about 50 lbs from his goal, but he's only lost 8 lbs to her 50...
Well, apparently, I'm not the only one who took it that way. That's why it's so important to express COMPLETE thoughts in FULL sentences. Would have really taken that much longer to write, "Congrats on your 50lb loss! Only 50 more to go. You can do it."0 -
Huh? Wha?!good progress , 50 lbs more
I was just fixing to say something similar, but you were much kinder than I was going to be. What a jerk! :mad:
Allow me to play devil's advocate for a moment: the OP's ticker does indicate she's about 50 lbs from her goal. Maybe he's just congratulating her on her success so far and encouraging her to continue and not give up.
And if he's just a jerk, you can easily say the same thing back to him, as his ticker indicates he is also about 50 lbs from his goal, but he's only lost 8 lbs to her 50...
Well, apparently, I'm not the only one who took it that way. That's why it's so important to express COMPLETE thoughts in FULL sentences. Would have really taken that much longer to write, "Congrats on your 50lb loss! Only 50 more to go. You can do it." It's especially important when considering that the comment came from a guy and the subject of the thread was about the OP having trouble with the fact that even after a 50lb loss, guys still don't seem to find her attractive.0 -
What's sad about negative feedback? Criticism is just as valuable (maybe even more valuable) than praise. At least from criticism you can grow. Besides, negative feedback also illustrates the right to free speech. There's nothing sad at all about that.
I understood what you meant, but perhaps you can't see what other people think you meant. The topic of the OP's post is a perceived lack of interest in her from men. Your comment may be taken by others to mean, "Well, you're still fat, lose another 50 lbs and then guys will notice you." It could come across to others that you're being incredibly shallow and glossing over her accomplishment and focusing on the work she has left to do.Saying "good progress, 50 lbs more" is rude nowdays?
edit: if someone weights 400, and lost 100lbs, is it MORE rude to say , good progress , 150lbs more. ?
It is sad we can get negative feedback, but the more you converse, the more power you give them. It's nice to defend, but sometimes you gotta let it go, and it(he/she) will usually go away too. There's also something called "ignore" option
Also, I don't think he needs to go away. It was a misunderstanding that can easily be cleared up by and objective observer as long as people are willing to drop their defensiveness. Not a big deal.0 -
Bringing due attention back to Brittany. You're beautiful! Your progress is VERY impressive and inspiring! Keep your chin up. Man or no man life is too short to waste it worrying!So I've been on this journey since February. Lost over 50 pounds and I am so excited! But it still seems to me that guys aren't interested in me. Anybody still struggling with the same thing?
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To everyone saying "You never find the right guy when you're looking for him," I call bull****. I met my fiance on an online dating site. It doesn't get more "looking" than that. We've been together 2.5 years, living together 1.5, engaged 7 months. Having done a lot of dating, I can assure you that he is VERY MUCH the right guy and not "just who came along," and I love him more every day.
::ahem::
Ok, on to the meat of the question: is your incomplete weight loss journey effecting your dating potential. Answer:different guys have different tastes. Ergo, some may be attracted to you as you are now, and some may not. This will be the case no matter what you weigh. If you really want to find Mr. Right, you just need to put yourself out there. TRY online dating, or join a Meet Up group for something you like to do, or whatever. Regardless of what people say, it's very rare that you will just magically happen upon someone who is perfect for you in the course of your every day life. Does it happen? Sure. Should you count on it? Not unless you want your companions in your old age to be feline. Go get 'em, girl.0 -
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:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :drinker:0 -
I know a lot of really great virtual ones... in the flesh though... I don't have hoards of followers. nope.0
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To everyone saying "You never find the right guy when you're looking for him," I call bull****. I met my fiance on an online dating site. It doesn't get more "looking" than that. We've been together 2.5 years, living together 1.5, engaged 7 months. Having done a lot of dating, I can assure you that he is VERY MUCH the right guy and not "just who came along," and I love him more every day.
When I said, "Don't go looking..." I simply meant to stop obsessing over it. Don't look at every single guy you meet and think of him as a possibility. I just meant go out and do things you enjoy simply because you enjoy them. This way, you learn to be happy with or without a man, which breeds confidence, which, in turn, attracts men. Bonus, you to meet guys who enjoy similar activities and interests, thusly, you will have much more in common with them. As far as the online dating thing, you are one of the lucky ones. I've tried several sites with no success, and many people I know have not had any success that way either. Sometimes it works, but more often than not, online dating is a waste of time and money.0 -
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Maybe it is your personality...0
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I wanna be a unicorn too... like that chick in "the last unicorn" except in reverse... tho the red bull scared the **** out of me...
um
nevermind0 -
The right man will come when the time is right. Focus on yourself and your goals because confidence is damn sexy!0
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I will give you my extra $0.02. You will find some guy or many. Who knows. In my opinion, there is no such thing as "the one.." That is some crap that Disney Movies or some other person created. The reality is that there are MANY that can be "the one." It comes down to two people working hard on loving each other. Yes, it's tons of work to keep that alive. It's easy to fall out of love if you really think about it.
Now, do yourself a favor and focus on you. Lose weight or meet your goals cuz you want to look at that mirror and say: "I'm sexy and I know it.." You DON'T want affirmations from guys. You want guys to give you compliments, sure. But you should know your value.
At the end of the day, guys and girls come and go. Love comes and goes. The only love you need to keep, is love for yourself.0 -
TMNT tshirts work, too.Put on an Avengers T shirt. You'll have a group of guys following you around like baby ducks within no time.
shirtless has also proven effective...
LOL!!!0
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