Before and After Where People Look Anorexic

Christine1110

I have not seen this...I have only seen heavy people change to a slim down version of themselves....looking healthier : ) Congrats to each & everyone of them for putting themselves first....

rmsrws

Do we have the right to judge others????? We are entitled to our opinions but do we need to speak them out loud?

I went from 252 lbs down to 105. I am healthy, and I am toned. I get called anorexic on a daily basis. The difference between anorexic people and me is muscle definition. I work out almost every day, this is my choice.

If you feel the need to comment then I'd suggest a private message to the individual. Being called anorexic hurts just as bad as being called a fat a** just sayin'

savlyon

There's been a lot of comments referring to the rule "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."

Ok, so if my zipper is down, which is the "nice" thing to do... say nothing at all or tell me in a whisper?

If my boyfriend is cheating on me with your best friend, which is the nice thing to do... mind your own business or tell me in a private message?

In this case, I don' t think commenting on the post something like "Honey, have you been to the doctor lately? You look anorexic..." would be a bad idea. The attention would all go to you and ruin the success. I think that a private message is completely appropriate. A private message that shows caring and concern in the least judgmental approach as possible.

lydia_the_tattooed_lady

I can't NOT say anything to people like that. I try to be nice but honest, i.e. You looked healthier in your before picture.... It's funny though because anybody who does call out the ill-looking person usually gets attacked for being a-holes. They seem to think that your not allowed to give an opinion just because it's a negative one. That's not how life works. I believe in losing weight to become healthy. The point of all this is health. And sometimes people get caught up in the cosmetic aspects of weight loss and end up being unhealthy. Why can't we call them out on unhealthy behavior that is harming them?

MinMin97

MFP does not want to promote ED's, although they do support those who are seeking to recover.
If you see a profile that encourages ED's, you can simply report it.
And you can be an encouragement toward anyone.

LorinaLynn

There's been times I've said something... but it's not just a matter of weight or appearance. There's a lot of other factors. For instance, if someone looks alarmingly thin, AND they're eating 500 calories a day, AND they think they need to cut calories more, AND they're exercising for hours each day, AND they're still not happy with their body, AND want to lose more weight....

firstsip

There's been times I've said something... but it's not just a matter of weight or appearance. There's a lot of other factors. For instance, if someone looks alarmingly thin, AND they're eating 500 calories a day, AND they think they need to cut calories more, AND they're exercising for hours each day, AND they're still not happy with their body, AND want to lose more weight....

Yup, this.

As yet another person who has dealt with anorexia for a large part of my life, let me just say: saying someone "looks anorexic" is like saying someone looks "schizophrenic." One would not say the latter, so why would you say the former?

Looking "very thin" or "unhealthy" is something else, though. It takes away the mental disorder as JUST being a physical appearance, since anorexia is much more than just "intentionally not eating/losing weight." You'd be surprised at how many people with EDs hover around "healthy" weights, but are deeply unhealthy because of the ways they eat, binge, purge, exercise, etc.

That being said: to the OP, I think I'm seeing what you're saying. I have noticed posts where people looked very thin post "weight loss." Too thin. I'm not saying subjective, but saying, "This looks like I did." There are tells; the quality of hair, skin. The way certain bones protrude. Are some people naturally that thin? Sure... those aren't the people in question. And skin/nails/hair = nutrition deficiency. A big tell? Someone saying, "I still have a way to go" or "Please be kind" when they're clearly very thin.

The thing I'm surprised no one's pointed out: during the weight loss process, everyone's a little body dysmorphic--your mind takes an average of three months to "catch up" to really any change in or on your body (You change meds? Three months to reach the blood stream. You change weight? Three months for your perception to catch up). This is evident almost daily with people's posts of, "I know I've lost the weight but I don't see/feel the difference."

So yes, I think it's very possible that some people don't realize how much weight they've lost. The change from obese/overweight/at the top of the BMI to the low end and are happy, enjoy it, etc... but the thought of being "unhealthy from too thin" seems foreign when they've grappled with the opposite of the spectrum for so long.

TL;DR: Please stop using "anorexic" synonymously with "very thin." Yes, I do think people have posted on MFP that are bordering on unhealthy behaviors if not already. Hell, I've dealt with triggers on this site BECAUSE of some posts like that. I think it wouldn't be out of place to point out, "Plug in your measurements to see how you're doing!" as a sly bump to make them check if they're unhealthy.

I do know that the very blase posts of, "Great work, keep it up!" or "You look great" that so many people unthinkingly post can also be damaging in that they can be enabling if the person legitimately looks unhealthy. When people said, "You look so thin!" to me at my lowest points, well, goddamn if I didn't want to look THINNER to keep those responses coming! Anecdotal? Yes. But something to think about in the blurry lines between "extreme weight loss" and "EDs."

gingerjen7

Based on pictures alone, I wouldn't say anything. I'm not going to say, "Wow, you look great, good job" if I don't think they look great, but I won't say that on any progress picture if it's not true. I might say "Wow, excellent progress, keep up the good work" to someone who has made it half way through or something because I think they deserve the accolades and encouragement.

If someone makes it obvious that they have unrealistically low weight goals (like someone who listed their goal weight at 100 lbs and took a lot of pictures from angles that made her stomach look skeletal) then I might say something about it, express concern. If they post encouraging other people to only eat 800 calories or something like that, then I just report it.