I'm tired and I'm struggling.

Greg3705

Focus on what you can you right, right now. You will develop a new routine that will allow you to get back to exercising like you want. Today take one step in the right direction.

JennKie1

You can do it! You're worth it! Sometimes when I get really stressed out (which it sounds like you've had a lot of "stressful" events recently), I just want to go home after work and lay on the couch and eat some "comfort" foods. We've all been there - I revisit that place more often than I'd care to admit. But.......if I force myself to do my workout, I always feel much better afterwards. It relieves some stress, and I feel better about myself. However, none of us is perfect; we all indulge once in awhile, we all skip a work-out because we just don't feel like it. Did you take "before" photos? When I feel myself getting way off track, I break mine out (they made me cry the first time I saw them) and give myself a little reminder of why I'm doing this. You've lost much more than I have, so you could use yours to see how far you've come! Don't beat yourself up. You know what you need to do, and when you're ready to get back to it, you will. No pressure. Just when you're ready to commit to it because you want to, not because someone else says you should or because you're just feeling guilty.

Graceious1

Stop, refocus then start again. Do what you feel is right for you because you are the one who will benefit.:flowerforyou:

dare2begin

Sounds like your in a rut...shake things up a bit.
Find something you and your boyfriend can do together.
Go on a hike or whatever outdoor activity is around you.
I have also heard that making your self go outside at least once a day, no matter the weather, even for a small walk will do wonders!

So, bottom line, shake things up!!

You got this...you can do it!!

heatherhb55

Wow this sounds familiar, I swear this is just like what I went though. I initially let it get the best of me and got off track, Congrats for catching the error of your ways and seeking help to change it!

While trying to get my groove back I found a couple things that helped me. One was setting a routine for working out and sticking to it, another was keeping healthy snacks handy at work. I actually go to trader joe's and get groceries just for work. When i have healthy food easily accessible it is easier to not eat out.

What really helped me was making up a mantra (yah CHEESY i know but it works)

Mine is "Pain is temporary pride is forever" when I feel like slacking and taking a nap instead I repeat this to myself. It's a great motivator. While I work out on the last mile on the treadmill you will catch me mumbling to myself, I am repeating this to myself to power through.

You can use anything that you feel works for you, i hope this helps you!

Good luck and don't give up.

iiijeniii

Perhaps you could change your profile to just maintain your current weight for a few weeks. Keep logging and exercising when you can ... walks with the boyfriend are good! Give your body a little bit of a break but just enough to maintain. When I was losing the majority of my weight I would lose for 2-3 weeks then maintain for a week or 2. Not really on purpose but that's how it worked out. I averaged 5 pounds down per month - and it didn't seem like torture.

mamasmaltz3

You are getting some great advice. TOM is not the time to be doing self-evaluation. Emotions are real but not reliable. Sometimes you have to make the conscience choice to tell your lying emotions to shutup. The truth is you have lost 24lbs in 4 month! That is great! We fall down, make mistakes, and then we get back up. You can do it, you have been doing it. Keep on keepin on! Add me if you want. I am on here everyday and I try to support my friends. I will even kick you in the pants if you give me permission, lol.

deksgrl

It sounds like you just need to adjust to the new schedule, the new "normal". Make some plans. Look at how things are right now as far as your eating and schedule and exercise and find some ways to make it work for you. If you have a longer commute, maybe that means use your crockpot more, then dinner is mostly done when you get home. Whatever is going to work. I agree with the person who said that you know what you have to do, just do it. Find a way to work it in to your new life.

onevierka

Great advice!

mercymarque

Get back in gear... If you lost that much and want to lose more u will! U have to find ur will and motivate urself, don't get comfortable that's what got u here. Get back exercising, drink ur water, log everything. U can do it because u did it before.

californiagirl2012

I've been on MFP for 129 days. The first 70 or so were great! However, the past 59 or so have been more of a struggle. In September I traveled, I moved, and I celebrated three family birthdays. I'm adjusting to now living with my boyfriend and I have a longer commute. I'm dealing with some issues at work, the weather is changing here in IL and I'm currently dealing with TOM. I'm tired and I feel like I'm failing... I know these are all challenges and/or excuses. I also know I need to recommit to exercise...and I guess I need to get remotivated. I'm still going through the motion but I am disappointed in myself.

Any advice? I know the *best* advice is just do it, but I'm looking for more constructive answers for now...

This is a hard journey. For everyone.

There is no mystery to weight loss, everyone thinks something is wrong, their metabolism is broken, they have low thyroid, they have menopause or whatever issue, they are as unique as a snowflake, whatever. I thought a lot of these things once too but once the doctor helped resolve the health issues for me I learned there is still no magic pill. Most people eat more than they need to and are not at good at estimating calories as they think they are. Most people have a lower BMR than they think they do. The only way to know for sure is to go to a lab and have it tested. It doesn't seem fair to have to eat less and feel a little hunger. It's hard to face the truth of it, very hard. It's not fun. It's drudgery at times. But if you learn to enjoy your smaller amounts of food (necessary to lose weight, since the reason we got fat in the first place was eating too much whether we knew it or not), and rejoice in your victories it can be done.

All I can do is share what worked for me. I achieved my goal at age 50 after beating my head against the wall for 15 years. Yeah anyone can do it, but I can tell you that you are up against a lot when you are older and I believe females have some unique issue to face with hormones and such. The sooner you can get a handle on it the better. DO NOT GIVE UP. As I got older and the weight piled on (and I didn't feel I was eating too much!) everyone kept telling me to give up, this is what happens when you get older. I'm small, and I didn't realize how small I was until I lost the weight. Everyone said I had big bones. I looked hefty because I worked out. Once I lost the weight I realized how small I really was and that small people don't need to eat as much as big people. HINT: If you are short you are probably small.

Your body loses weight in chunks, not linear. I have found that you can do everything right and your weight loss seems to plateau but if you are patient and keep exercising and eating at a deficit (however slight) you will lose it, it will suddenly "whoosh". There are so many variables for the scale; water retention, digestion, hormones, allergies, sodium, carbs, water intake, DOMS, inflammation, the list goes on. People mistakenly think they lose or gain weight when they eat more or less because of these fluctuations.

Losing weight requires tremendous patience. You will not lose it when you want it or where you want it. The body does its thing. Some apparent plateaus can last a month or so. You cannot make it happen faster. You must focus on two things; calories and exercise. Nothing else matters. Scales and metrics don't matter. The day in and day out grind of exercise and calories are all that matters. It is not very exciting until things fall into place. You get your victories and you ride one victory to the next.

The scale is a trend tool. The scale is good but put it away and only check once a week and only use it as a trend tool. It will fluctuate, it does not matter. Take front side and back progress pictures at least once a month. You will see differences that the metrics won't tell you and it's that little bit of NSV that will keep you going until the next victory.

To say eat more is wrong.

To say eat less is wrong.

To find the exact calories needed for YOU to be in a healthy sustainable calorie deficit is the right answer. Wait, if you need to adjust by 100 do it, wait, adjust, wait, adjust, wait. The tortoise wins this race.

All that matters is calories. A healthy balanced diet within a calorie budget for a deficit that is right for YOU is all that matters for weight loss. Don't make it complicated.


Also people play mental accounting games with calories just like with finances. Make steps to make sure you are making accurate measurements. Packaged foods can have MORE than they say but not less (they get in trouble if less so they would rather error with MORE).

If you typically intake sodium at a certain rate your body adjusts, but if you make a sudden change then you will see a spike.

Exercise is for making your lean body mass pretty (especially lifting weights) for when the fat is gone. Losing fat with no muscle is ugly and cardio alone will not make you pretty. You cannot out exercise too many calories.

It really is about calories. I tell people this all the time and they say "Well if calories are all that matter why do you eat so clean???!!" Well, because it makes me feel better, sleep better, and perform better at my sports.

Too many changes at once can be hard on some people. I've always eaten healthy so it easy for me to simply eat less. Eating at a calorie deficit is hard on people; even a small deficit puts your body in a state of flux with hormones and such. Everyone is different. Some people can handle a deeper calorie deficit than others, this is not right or wrong, it just is. Stress in your life affects your hunger hormones; lack of sleep, fatigue, job stress, family stress, financial stress, etc. Add in emotional eating issues and it gets even more complicated. Most people can only handle so much change/stress at once, they try to do too much and fail. Sometimes it might be a better strategy to eat at maintenance and make some small changes first, it really depends on how much stress you are taking in at the moment.

Ge0rgiana

I've been on MFP for 129 days. The first 70 or so were great! However, the past 59 or so have been more of a struggle. In September I traveled, I moved, and I celebrated three family birthdays. I'm adjusting to now living with my boyfriend and I have a longer commute. I'm dealing with some issues at work, the weather is changing here in IL and I'm currently dealing with TOM. I'm tired and I feel like I'm failing... I know these are all challenges and/or excuses. I also know I need to recommit to exercise...and I guess I need to get remotivated. I'm still going through the motion but I am disappointed in myself.

Any advice? I know the *best* advice is just do it, but I'm looking for more constructive answers for now...

Hi, Maria. :flowerforyou: I try not to do any kind of strenuous thinking, decision-making, etc. when TOM is hanging around. When I start to have those frustrated feelings, I just give myself a break and acknowledge that hormones are addling my thinking. I say wait until it passes and then re-assess. HTH.

mcn79

I just wanted to thank everyone for their advice, support and input. I'm feeling MUCH better this week. I took an overdue day off on Friday and really did just relax. I'm back to walking at lunch everyday and I am working towards a more strenuous workout a few days a week. I just need to figure out a way to work it in... I already miss the long hours of daylight. I've also got a better grip on my food choices and am constantly tweaking things. Thanks again for listening!