Mike’s Daily Rant 10/30/2012 Topic: Burger Buddies
MikeDaMotivator
Posts: 1,144
When you respect a person, whatever the reason may be, they usually know by the way you act around them. They also know that you respect them by how you treat them. For example, I respect my mother enough to filter my conversation in front of her. Yes I curse, tell inappropriate jokes and I have provocative conversation topics but when she is around, that does not happen.
This weekend I learned that a few of my friends, formally known as, my burger buddies have a respect for me. It’s a bit interesting but I accepted it and kept it moving. Saturday we decided to go watch the Florida versus Georgia game at bar. We get to the bar 30 minutes before kickoff and can’t wait to see the menus. We have all established that we are pretty hungry while waiting to be seated. As soon as the waitress comes back to the table we order a drink while looking at the menu. I order a cup of water and a Carona with lime. I’m not sure what everyone else ordered to drink because I was so focused on the menu. When drinks arrived we all started drinking them right away.
The waitress asked if we were ready to order or if we needed more time? We all said that we were ready. Everyone at the table looks at me and says Mike you order first. I realize what is going on here. Not much explanation was needed but I understood loud and clear. I have had quite a bit of success with weight loss so I am the measuring stick whenever we go out to eat with my burger buddies. I didn’t realize until Saturday how much my food choices affect everyone else’s decision at the table. However, I am now under the microscope so I feel a little pressure. I order a Portobello Mushroom Burger with cheddar and Blue Cheese crumbles, tomatoes and lettuce on a toasted Kaiser roll. Oh and hold the beef please. With a Side of Sweet Potato fries and a pickle. I nicknamed this sandwich the fungus burger.
Now I look up and see them all looking over the menu again. One of my friends asked me where did I see that on the menu? I tell them that I saw it under burgers and just asked to hold the beef. Now it’s their turn to order. Now the pressure is off of me since I have ordered. I then become a little curious to see what everyone else order. They all act as if they don’t know what they want anymore. It’s quite interesting how their minds went blank after I ordered. It almost seemed as if they wanted to go into a huddle and change the play. They ask for more time after the new found confusion over comes them. She comes back after about 5 minutes and now they appear poised enough to order. My friend Adrian looks at me and looks at waitress and orders 20 piece wings with fries. My friend Brice orders the house burger with onion rings. My friend Larry orders a salad and then changes his mind in the middle. This was the strange part that tickled me a little. Larry orders the Philly Cheese hoagie with fries and then apologizes to me after ordering it. When the waitress walks off they say well I’m sorry but I had to order what I wanted.
The part that puzzled me is that they felt the need to apologize to me. That’s when I figured it out that they have a respect for me. They somehow felt that ordering what they ordered was disrespectful so they felt the need to apologize. I told them that we are adults and make our own decisions. I am not offended. I actually would have ordered any of those had I not “Wanted” The Fungus burger. If we are all doing what we are supposed to in our everyday lives, it is ok to order whatever your belly so desires.
However, I know that not one of my former burger buddies are my current gym buddies. So I know that there is a slight difference between me ordering the house favorite and them ordering it. I work-out extremely hard every day and I told them that as long as those calories are burned off, it’s a happy day for us all.
Realize that when you are living a healthier more active lifestyle, people look up to you and respect what you are doing. Dont let them down and even more importantly dont put them down. I could have said a few slick things but I chose not to because I learned that there is a level of respect between us and I certainly dont want to lose that by running my mouth the way that I normally would have with a smart comment.
MikeMontana1914
This weekend I learned that a few of my friends, formally known as, my burger buddies have a respect for me. It’s a bit interesting but I accepted it and kept it moving. Saturday we decided to go watch the Florida versus Georgia game at bar. We get to the bar 30 minutes before kickoff and can’t wait to see the menus. We have all established that we are pretty hungry while waiting to be seated. As soon as the waitress comes back to the table we order a drink while looking at the menu. I order a cup of water and a Carona with lime. I’m not sure what everyone else ordered to drink because I was so focused on the menu. When drinks arrived we all started drinking them right away.
The waitress asked if we were ready to order or if we needed more time? We all said that we were ready. Everyone at the table looks at me and says Mike you order first. I realize what is going on here. Not much explanation was needed but I understood loud and clear. I have had quite a bit of success with weight loss so I am the measuring stick whenever we go out to eat with my burger buddies. I didn’t realize until Saturday how much my food choices affect everyone else’s decision at the table. However, I am now under the microscope so I feel a little pressure. I order a Portobello Mushroom Burger with cheddar and Blue Cheese crumbles, tomatoes and lettuce on a toasted Kaiser roll. Oh and hold the beef please. With a Side of Sweet Potato fries and a pickle. I nicknamed this sandwich the fungus burger.
Now I look up and see them all looking over the menu again. One of my friends asked me where did I see that on the menu? I tell them that I saw it under burgers and just asked to hold the beef. Now it’s their turn to order. Now the pressure is off of me since I have ordered. I then become a little curious to see what everyone else order. They all act as if they don’t know what they want anymore. It’s quite interesting how their minds went blank after I ordered. It almost seemed as if they wanted to go into a huddle and change the play. They ask for more time after the new found confusion over comes them. She comes back after about 5 minutes and now they appear poised enough to order. My friend Adrian looks at me and looks at waitress and orders 20 piece wings with fries. My friend Brice orders the house burger with onion rings. My friend Larry orders a salad and then changes his mind in the middle. This was the strange part that tickled me a little. Larry orders the Philly Cheese hoagie with fries and then apologizes to me after ordering it. When the waitress walks off they say well I’m sorry but I had to order what I wanted.
The part that puzzled me is that they felt the need to apologize to me. That’s when I figured it out that they have a respect for me. They somehow felt that ordering what they ordered was disrespectful so they felt the need to apologize. I told them that we are adults and make our own decisions. I am not offended. I actually would have ordered any of those had I not “Wanted” The Fungus burger. If we are all doing what we are supposed to in our everyday lives, it is ok to order whatever your belly so desires.
However, I know that not one of my former burger buddies are my current gym buddies. So I know that there is a slight difference between me ordering the house favorite and them ordering it. I work-out extremely hard every day and I told them that as long as those calories are burned off, it’s a happy day for us all.
Realize that when you are living a healthier more active lifestyle, people look up to you and respect what you are doing. Dont let them down and even more importantly dont put them down. I could have said a few slick things but I chose not to because I learned that there is a level of respect between us and I certainly dont want to lose that by running my mouth the way that I normally would have with a smart comment.
MikeMontana1914
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Replies
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I agree! Great post!0
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SEE you are not the JERK you claim to be ALL the time afterall, this is a good story. I didnt realize that I have friends and family who do the same thing until you just posted this. Its like oh, they do rethink what they want to eat just cuz im present. Its silly but cute and yes, respectful. But im with you, they are grown and Imma surely eat what I want and they should do the same....0
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Awesome as usuall! I have a friend that always says, "Just so that YOU are aware when we "insert activity here; movie, bar, restaurant" I AM eating whatever I want"
and I always say "Ok, me too" and then gives me the 'are you kidding me?" look when I get a salad :laugh: 0 -
SEE you are not the JERK you claim to be ALL the time afterall, this is a good story. I didnt realize that I have friends and family who do the same thing until you just posted this. Its like oh, they do rethink what they want to eat just cuz im present. Its silly but cute and yes, respectful. But im with you, they are grown and Imma surely eat what I want and they should do the same....
Isn't it something?0 -
\Awesome as usuall! I have a friend that always says, "Just so that YOU are aware when we "insert activity here; movie, bar, restaurant" I AM eating whatever I want" and I always say "Ok, me too" and then gives me the 'are you kidding me?" look when I get a salad :laugh:
Haha!! Thats funny.0 -
This sounds more than respect to me Mike. I know respect is great, but it sounds to me that these guys really LIKE you. They agonized over what to order because they didn't want to tempt you. They want you to continue to succeed. I can respect someone... my boss, my parents, my siblings... but maybe not like them. These guys like you, so they got you to order first. That way, they didn't feel that their choices influenced you negatively.
You're lucky to have such good friends. And you are a role model to them, so who knows... one of these days one or more of them will be ordering fungus burgers too.
Congratulations, on your success... to stay with is for so long and come so far, WOW is all I can say0 -
First of all, I can not wait to eat a fungus burger (almost spelt it booger LOL)..And even more to the point, I can not wait to be a rolemodel!! WTG Mike!!!0
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This sounds more than respect to me Mike. I know respect is great, but it sounds to me that these guys really LIKE you. They agonized over what to order because they didn't want to tempt you. They want you to continue to succeed. I can respect someone... my boss, my parents, my siblings... but maybe not like them. These guys like you, so they got you to order first. That way, they didn't feel that their choices influenced you negatively.
You're lucky to have such good friends. And you are a role model to them, so who knows... one of these days one or more of them will be ordering fungus burgers too.
Congratulations, on your success... to stay with is for so long and come so far, WOW is all I can say
Thank You for the kind words. I think they like me too but I dont think they are worried about tempting me. I have been out with them and they have ordered and not apologized. This time I think they were just expecting me to order something more loaded with calories. I just didnt so tha switched the game up a litlle. It was quite weird. We dont normally have this issue. Not sure where the apologies came from either but it was interesting.0 -
First of all, I can not wait to eat a fungus burger (almost spelt it booger LOL)..And even more to the point, I can not wait to be a rolemodel!! WTG Mike!!!
Thanks and they are so delicious! I say that you already are a role model. When you live and do things the way that you are supposed to people will follow. But remember you are always being watched.0 -
I guess I got the date wrong. 10/29/20120
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I agree! Great post!
Thank You!0 -
Obviously, if they order first, it does make it hard for you to not follow suit, and obviously you don't want them to feel guilty for ordering what they want. Maybe if you just agree that you order first, no take backs, and then they do what they like.
Less pressure for you, you'll still be monitored and there's no avoiding that, but hopefully you can convince them that your choice doesn't have to affect theirs.0 -
Ironsmasher..good idea
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Obviously, if they order first, it does make it hard for you to not follow suit, and obviously you don't want them to feel guilty for ordering what they want. Maybe if you just agree that you order first, no take backs, and then they do what they like.
Less pressure for you, you'll still be monitored and there's no avoiding that, but hopefully you can convince them that your choice doesn't have to affect theirs.
Ultimately thats what it boils down to. I dont want my decision to ever affect theirs. Not my intention.0 -
I am truely surprised you did not lecture them about their poor eating habits and demand they change or the friendship is over. Evidently you are ok with SOME people not being healthy and making changes, while others don't get that pass.0
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I am truely surprised you did not lecture them about their poor eating habits and demand they change or the friendship is over. Evidently you are ok with SOME people not being healthy and making changes, while others don't get that pass.
Saturday. Football. Im sure they werent in the mood for it. Nor was I. Nor did they ask for advice. Give a little take a little. I thought that things turned out perfectly.0 -
I am truely surprised you did not lecture them about their poor eating habits and demand they change or the friendship is over. Evidently you are ok with SOME people not being healthy and making changes, while others don't get that pass.
Plus we went to a bar and there are limited healthy options. We all knew that before we went so we didnt go there to be healthy. Just interesting how things played out.0 -
I am truely surprised you did not lecture them about their poor eating habits and demand they change or the friendship is over. Evidently you are ok with SOME people not being healthy and making changes, while others don't get that pass.
And for the record I have never offered an ultimatum stating that you eat healthy or we arent friends to anyone. That is not how I role. I think you may have misread another post.0 -
I agree completely! Sometimes I do splurge more but it just means I have to work harder on those days. I was invited to an end of summer bbq at one friend's house and a saturday evening get-together at another friend's house, and both of them made sure to tell me there would be healthy/low cal/low fat options. 6 months ago none of my friends would've planned their party menus based on what I would eat! It feels good to be supported by the people who wish us well and want to see us succeed. Unfortunately I have another friend who stopped talking to me in 2007 when I lost nearly 70 lbs in 7 months. She started talking to me again when I fell off the wagon. And now that I'm getting healthy again...for keeps this time... she doesn't talk to me anymore. I wish we could do it together or she could just love me as a friend unconditionally fat or skinny because she is my oldest friend in the world. But we can't tell people how to feel. I know it stems from her own unhappiness because she is over 400 lbs. But I just keep moving forward. Your true friends will stick by you. I'm glad your burger buddies value your friendship enough that they respect your choices when hanging out with you and you influence them enough that they look to see what you're doing before makingtheir choices. That's how friends should be!0
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Nice. I am shocked!0
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I am feeling TOTALLY inspired after reading your post, Mike! Thank you for sharing this! 200lbs is an amazing feat!0
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I agree completely! Sometimes I do splurge more but it just means I have to work harder on those days. I was invited to an end of summer bbq at one friend's house and a saturday evening get-together at another friend's house, and both of them made sure to tell me there would be healthy/low cal/low fat options. 6 months ago none of my friends would've planned their party menus based on what I would eat! It feels good to be supported by the people who wish us well and want to see us succeed. Unfortunately I have another friend who stopped talking to me in 2007 when I lost nearly 70 lbs in 7 months. She started talking to me again when I fell off the wagon. And now that I'm getting healthy again...for keeps this time... she doesn't talk to me anymore. I wish we could do it together or she could just love me as a friend unconditionally fat or skinny because she is my oldest friend in the world. But we can't tell people how to feel. I know it stems from her own unhappiness because she is over 400 lbs. But I just keep moving forward. Your true friends will stick by you. I'm glad your burger buddies value your friendship enough that they respect your choices when hanging out with you and you influence them enough that they look to see what you're doing before makingtheir choices. That's how friends should be!
Wow Im sorry about your friend. She needs more motivation. The question is, who wants to be miserable alone? She feels as if you are leaving her behind but in actuality, you are inviting her along for the ride. Talk to her and tell her how you feel about HER not supporting YOU. Don't lose your friendship if you can help it. If it is a real freindship she will support you and maybe someday join you. Best of luck and congrats on your progress.0 -
Nice. I am shocked!
Go spank yourself :laugh: :laugh:0 -
I am feeling TOTALLY inspired after reading your post, Mike! Thank you for sharing this! 200lbs is an amazing feat!
Thank You very much.0 -
that was great!0
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Way to take control of your health! It is so inspirational to see someone who has taken responsibility and made changes to be a healthier person. So awesome & motivational - makes me want to to go the gym right now 0
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Well, it sounds like you have some pretty good friends.
And you sound like a good friend to them.
Keep being a role model. Nice post!! Thanks!0 -
Awesome as usuall! I have a friend that always says, "Just so that YOU are aware when we "insert activity here; movie, bar, restaurant" I AM eating whatever I want" and I always say "Ok, me too" and then gives me the 'are you kidding me?" look when I get a salad :laugh:
Apparently, we have a friend in common. That is funny, but also a little sad.0 -
That is sweet glad that you have people that respect your journey0
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Way to take control of your health! It is so inspirational to see someone who has taken responsibility and made changes to be a healthier person. So awesome & motivational - makes me want to to go the gym right now
Go ahead my friend. The gym loves us!0
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