How to deal with people heavier than you.....

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  • slywon
    slywon Posts: 85 Member
    For the record I was not so much saying that my friends were trying to hurt me or bring me down. They just do not understand I think how I can not be "satisfied" with my body because they would be so accomplished if they got down to that size from their starting weight. The point I was mainly trying to make is that I feel awkward when out and about and I am having a water instead of a coffee with Baileys and whip cream and they say "what r u doing". I don't want my answer in any way to make them feel that they must have major issues because they are heavier than me. Everyone has there own path in life. I love to encourage and share knowledge but I really don't want to preach to anyone ever. (Side note:except my husband. I am having trouble not preaching to him because I love him so much and he is about 60 lbs. overweight and could care less :love: )
  • jwstew007
    jwstew007 Posts: 67
    If, or when, I get skinny enough to get such comments from any overweight friend, I'll be a true friend and explain to them how much better I fell and just how it's not about getting thinner.. it's about getting healthier and they can do the same, then i'd invite them to come workout at the gym with me. (and introduce them to MFP)

    They will either never bring it up again or better yet you actually motivated someone into making a positive change in their life..
  • mamasmaltz3
    mamasmaltz3 Posts: 1,111 Member
    I remember standing with two friends and the one one friend who is tiny was giving the other friend a peice of clothing because it didn't fit her. The friend receiving the clothing looks at me and starts saying how she has a big butt and that is why she is getting the too big clothing. I think we are talking about the difference between a small and a medium. I was standing there wearing a 2xl thinking I wish my butt was that big, and feeling really embarrassed. I say all this just to say that we all need to be aware of our words and how we can hurt people around us without meaning to.
  • gothicfires
    gothicfires Posts: 240 Member
    I think as long as you know you are already beautiful and loosing the 30 pounds to be a more healthier you, then it's great. But if someone smaller than me says something to the affect of 'i need to loose weight because I'm fat' then it's a bit irksome. I've seen women who were smaller than I will ever hope to be once I loose weight complain about being fat... and it took every effort not to say 'well if your pants were the correct size muffin top, you wouldn't feel fat.' and this was at a time when i was 35 pounds lighter than I am now.

    Perhaps not you, but some women deserve that information slap. 'You're small, you're beautiful... acknowledge it, enjoy it!" Even if those women aren't exactly the picture perfect woman society things they should be.

    If you are mentally and physically healthy about the reason that you are loosing weight, then your overweight friends will eventually understand. Give them time and a little respect. Perhaps it will even inspire them to join you.
  • momwhosbusy
    momwhosbusy Posts: 154 Member
    People are used to seeing large people. It's kinda considered normal to be overweight or obese,

    This...my MIL and grandfather in law (All my inlaws are very over weight) are constantly telling me I've lost enough. Finally I said to them that I am JUST barely at a healthy weight for my age and height and they were astonished! My MIL was actually quite logical about it and came to this same conclusion...that we are just so used to seeing overweight as normal that we consider healthy weight too thin.

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