either my father's a jerk, or I'm oversensitive

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Replies

  • NocturnalGirl
    NocturnalGirl Posts: 1,762
    Prove him wrong! You can do it! Congrats on your progress so far :)
  • OnionGirl7
    OnionGirl7 Posts: 33
    I don't know your Dad, but if you think he was being hurtful, then he's probably said a lot worse in the past and your reacting to it.

    My Mother is the ***** Cow from Hell and now when she makes her "comments" I try and smile and think "you sad pathetic cow, go be jealous and spiteful elsewhere, is this really all you have in your life picking on your kids". It really naffs her off that I no longer let her get to me.

    I've learnt The Best form of Revenge? Just carry on with your life and be happy :)

    You are doing really well and If you start the old comfort eating pattern again then he will have won. Do you really want that??
  • sarahg148
    sarahg148 Posts: 701 Member
    Could be a few scenarios:

    1. He's clueless about how difficult it is for you to lose that weight in that time.
    2. He's jealous but doesn't even know it.
    3. Maybe he is overweight himself and is just in denial.
    4. He is supportive, but doesn't know how to show it.
    5. Maybe he's just cynical.
    6. I don't know you either, but maybe you've lose weight in the past and then gained it right back...like a LOT of us. :)

    Regardless...just keep doing what you're doing and really try to focus on changing your lifestyle or else the weight could quite easily come back. It is a daily battle. Just make better decisions with food choices and get in your exercise. And track...it may dissuade you from maybe eating some food you don't really need or even want! Good luck!:bigsmile:
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
    When I let him know that it bothered me he told me I was oversensitive, which I eventually figured out is just an abusive ahole's way of blaming the victim.

    oh geezuz....now her dad is an abusive ahole? aint you a peach
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
    Won't he look like an *kitten* when you look amazing at Christmas:bigsmile: It was a rude comment but use it as motivation, not as an excuse to 'cheat' on your diet.
  • RedHeadDevotchka
    RedHeadDevotchka Posts: 1,394 Member
    That would hurt me if someone said that to me without so much of a "hey good for you" or something before saying the Christmas bit. He may have meant nothing by that, but to not acknowledge your hard work, ya that would hurt a bit.
  • AyaKara
    AyaKara Posts: 220
    My mom made the same comment last night about Thanksgiving! My best friend stays with us for the holiday since her family doesn't celebrate & I was telling her how I was going to eat in moderation & remind myself 'there's always tomorrow to eat again'. My mom was like, 'yeah, okay, we'll see when you're piling the plates together!' She also mentioned how I'm going to do the same thing on Christmas. So, I'm just going to show her otherwise for the sake of my health. & you need to do the same, not only for your dad, but for yourself! :smile:
  • Barbellerella
    Barbellerella Posts: 1,838 Member
    I would have been direct and asked "yeah, so what do you mean by that?" Clearing up any confusion and if that IS what he meant by the comment you could have addressed it then. Rather than stuff in your feelings which now makes you want to eat.
  • editnonnalynn
    editnonnalynn Posts: 495 Member
    I hope he meant, "Oh that is FANTASTIC, sweetheart! That means that you will have a healthy lifestyle habit so you will be strong during the holidays!" Either way, I would throw out any real or perceived rudeness/discouragement, and consider any truth in his statement. Use it as motivation to PLAN your holiday eating and enjoy more than just the food of it. But Do Not do it for him.....

    CONGRATS on your FANTASTIC loss, sweetheart!!!! :flowerforyou:
  • jesse1379
    jesse1379 Posts: 239 Member
    Woman.....:huh:
  • gimpygramma
    gimpygramma Posts: 383 Member
    To quote my friend's 2 1/2 year old grand daughter, "Him's an A**hole."
  • MindyG150
    MindyG150 Posts: 1,296 Member
    Never apologize for your feelings, own them! If it hurt your feelings say so and move on, certainly don't dwell on it...so not worth it!
  • My1985Freckles
    My1985Freckles Posts: 1,039 Member
    Seems like a stupid remark on his part, but I'd let it go and CONGRATS!!!!! 19pounds in 9 weeks is AWESOME! Keep up the good work!
  • Heather_Rider
    Heather_Rider Posts: 1,159 Member
    =(

    Well, its my mom for me.. When my dad said to me.. "WOW, you look like you lost half of your body!" My mom replied.. "Did you see how long her hair has gotten?" with a smirk.

    No, you arent over sensitive.. your dad is a jerk.. and my moms a b*tch. Im sorry love.
  • Yukongil
    Yukongil Posts: 166 Member
    see, I would have just called my dad and *kitten* and then body slammed him, but then I hated my father and was bigger than him. I don't know any advice to give to people that actually care about their dads, sorry.

    but on the off chance you do. Wait till thanksgiving, and he's put the carving knife away. Ask him if he want's some gravy, make sure it is fresh and HOT, then throw it in his eyes. While he's screaming from all that tasty hot gravy burning his cornea, body spear him out of his chair (extra points if you can go out of a window dramatically). He will be dazed and still in a lot of pain from the scalding gravy attack. Grab him by his hair (or in the case of male pattern baldness, the back of his neck) and lock up with him. A swift knee to the gut will double him over. Then grab him around the waist from over top of him and then lift (this is what you've really been doing all those squats and deadlifts for) and power bomb him on the nearest table (dining if still inside, picnic if outside).

    Call him a jabroni and return to your tasty turkey dinner, ask anyone else if they would like some gravy.
  • YoungDoc2B
    YoungDoc2B Posts: 1,593 Member
    But...Christmas IS coming up...am I missing something?
  • My1985Freckles
    My1985Freckles Posts: 1,039 Member
    =(

    Well, its my mom for me.. When my dad said to me.. "WOW, you look like you lost half of your body!" My mom replied.. "Did you see how long her hair has gotten?" with a smirk.

    No, you arent over sensitive.. your dad is a jerk.. and my moms a b*tch. Im sorry love.

    What a very odd response from your mother.... really very very odd.... I'm still trying to decifer that one... how very very odd.... LOL
  • whiteheaddg
    whiteheaddg Posts: 325 Member
    He's your ONLY Dad and he loves you!! I say your being too sensitive!

    I lost my Daddy unexpectedly back in March and would give ANYTHING even my left leg to talk to hear his voice no matter what he said.

    Call him up and tell him you love him (RIGHT NOW!) and thank him for being YOUR Dad. Hug him everytime you see him, because there might be a time that you can't.

    And Congrats on YOUR weight loss!! :)
    This is a wonderful post and something everyone should take in. I am sorry for your loss, but it seems he raised a wise person. No doubt he is proud.
  • BritneysStuntDouble
    BritneysStuntDouble Posts: 849 Member
    Casting a vote for "oversensitive".

    You will not achieve your goals if you assume the worst of people's comments, and then let that affect your behavior. People will always have their comments, and will likely voice them. Time to determine your own fate, and not allow the prevailing winds to push you off course, sister.
  • CoffeeNBooze
    CoffeeNBooze Posts: 966 Member
    I think what you are feeling is disappointment because you expected him to acknowledge how important this is to you and what you have accomplished in just 9 weeks. I'm sure he doesn't want to break you down, he was just more light hearted about the matter than you and knows people are notorious for packing on weight during the holiday. Use it as fuel to show him that won't be you! And also, tell him how you feel, regardless if you think your feelings are questionable. You don't need a forum of people to tell you that.

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