Advice On Saying No?

EBBlue10

This is so silly. I realize that not eating something I shouldn't should be as easy as "no thank you". But....apparently it's not.

For those of you that have struggled with saying no to the cookies at work, the candy dish, the french fries on your long commute home, the "I deserve this because I had a bad day" ice cream.....

What have you done to convince yourself to stop? I know, just do it.........but that's not working for me. I feel like I need someone following me around all the time to make my food choices for me.

This is so frustrating because I have watched my mom deal with this my entire life, and from the outside, it seems so simple.......help....be kind please, I know how silly this is.

TommiEgan

I find it hard to say no. I usually find imagining how I would look if I had my diet consiting of just bad foods generally helps. For me with being tempted to buy food. I take out all my cards and most of my cash in my wallet and I sometimes leave my wallet at home. If I can't afford it I can't have it.
Or replace the food. If someone offers you a cookie, go find an apple!

Rita_Rocker

I know, I watched my Mom "diet" my whole life. For me I don't call it a "diet". That is a 4 letter word for a reason, I think. To me it seems "restricting". Two weeks ago I had TWO ice cream sandwiches 3x/in a week...and I put it on my food log. My trainer says OMG you had sooo many ice cream sandwiches! And I said "and yes, there were delicious"! And I still lost 14 lbs. in 5 weeks and my body fat machine proved I did not starve it off. I choose to not be hard on myself, I am human. I have made SO MANY changes since Oct. 1st but I still crave Cheetos. I have sugar and fast food addiction, I call it what it is. I try to cut myself slack. But then get back on my goals again. I guess I "fell off the Cheetoe wagon"...LOL..

Someone put chocolate chip cookies in the breakroom last week at my job....I wrote a huge note and laid it by the cookies: "Dear Cookies, you have NO POWER over me ! Love, Rita. Worked for me at the time.

Hang in there, keeped focused as you can. The stronger you get and closer to your goal you get it might get easier to say "no" since it will delay you from your goal. Remember...obsticles are put in between you and your goal, to see if you really wanted the goal, or just thought you did. Take care and good luck! Rita

Trickybird

For me I think about the consequences of over eating (the ones I haven't experienced YET):

1. Diabetes
2. Fatty Liver Disease
3. Leaving my daughter without a mother
4. Not being able to ride an airplane, or an amusement ride
5. Knee replacement surgery
6. Death

I think of these and remember this IS in my control and ONLY mine. I owe it to myself, my family and the world to do the next right thing.

Good Luck

BaconMD

Saying No gets a lot easier when you stop saying Never.

Have one cookie instead of one bag of cookies. Have a small slice of cake, not three giant slabs of cake. Have one small bag of chips, not a box of 50 small bags of chips.

Log it.

Fit it into your day.

Breathe.

Live.

leomom72

sometimes its hard for me, but usually i think of WHY i was fat to begin with..things like that..tonight i was at the store and got some paper towels, and grabbed some candy bars for the rest of my family while i was waiting in line, and i was ok with it..it is hard, but can be done..just as we were used to eating at will, we can train ourselves to do the opposite as well..but dammit..i want a candy bar now :laugh:

princessgoddess

Just think about having to record it and then having to stare at it!! That helps me!

VelociMama

For me, it all boils down to motivation. Stress and fatigue can make it harder, but in the end, it's always a choice between wanting to do better every day or not.

I also find it really helpful to carefully plan out meals every day so I know what I'm having and not to deprive myself of treats. I just keep them within my calorie budget.

miracole

portion control and penance runs. LOL

MaryJane_8810002

I think of how much it is going to cost. By eating those cookies at work I am going to feel sluggish and miss my personal training session. Skipping my personal training session I get more fast food and junk food on my way home . I eat the food at home and get mad at myself. The next morning I still feel bloated so I have to shell out for some oolong tea. That has cost me almost $75.00 I could have used to get my hair done. In a nutshell keep a snack in your purse. I keep a yummy Luna Bar (the same company that makes Clif Bars) in there, or some nuts.

Brianna72994

Keep your goals in mind.


Or, if you absolutely HAVE to, use moderation. Only have 1 or 2 pieces of candy, order a SMALL order of fries, eat only half a cookie, etc.

erinmpayne

Sweets at work can be REALLY difficult! (Especially if someone offers you something they home baked! LOL!) What I usually do is just have ONE BITE. Not a huge one, of course, but one that's just enough to taste and just enough to savor! Takes a lot of will-power, but it's worked for me!

sarah44254

Say yes instead.

Ask yourself, "is today the day I'm going to be on track and healthy? AM I AWESOME???"

YES.

incredible_shrinking_man

Hello,

I understand what you mean. It is REALLY hard to say "no" sometimes and it seems like every time I want to be careful there is some circumstance that makes it difficult. It always seems so ironic to me. Restaurants that always gave me small portions make them larger. People around me have birthdays and bring in cake and cookies. Etc.

Unfortunately, I have had to become the King of "no" because I work in film and in this business we have a little thing called "craft services". Producers, in order to keep the crew happy all day, provide a tempting table of FREE food all day long! And trust me, it's not healthy food! I must pass this table hundreds of time a day and it kills me sometimes. It's one thing when you have to pay for food...it's quite another when it is free.

I just want you to know that you can make it. It's difficult, but WELL worth it!

Christopher

ropermom

For me, I try to change my perspective on what a "treat" is for my body. Am I really treating myself when I eat something that I know is not positive for my body because it will make it fat? Or am I abusing myself instead.
If I want to reward myself, why oh why would I eat that cupcake. That is not a reward. That is something that will put weight on and cause me anguish about that weight. Some reward!!
What would a better alternative be? ....

Another thing I will do if I can't stop eating something is just throw it in the trash or pour it down the drain.... Looks better there than it would on my hips!!!
OK If I have to have a bite I take the bite and pitch the whole rest of the box of cookies, cake, etc.
No temptation to fish it out and eat the rest...:sick:

Hope this crazy thinking helps!

SafioraLinnea

My number one motivator is the results I see so far. I have found that it really does get easier saying no after saying no for long enough. I may be a minority on this site, but I don't believe in *ALWAYS* saying no to everything, provided you are absolutely and completely honest with yourself on the calories you eat. If you want to have a candy from the candy bowl, take one.

I remember spending two days thinking about a box of milk chocolate almonds that I bought from a fundraiser.. For me, cravings usually pass in minutes if not seconds. When they don't I make room to indulge slightly. I opened the box, ate two chocolate almonds (ate them very slowly and savored every bit) and then took the rest to my neighbor's house for her son. And I still lost weight that week.

I often will logic with myself when looking at something I'm considering eating, no matter whether it is meal time or not.

My thought process goes like this:
Do I actually like this food? If I don't like it, I refuse to waste my calories eating something I'm not actually going to enjoy.
Is it meal time? (if yes, first food into stomach must be a fruit or a green/orange/red/purple veggie as a part of a proper carb/protein/fat meal. If no, next question)
Am I thirsty? (go get a glass of water, drink water, next question)
Am I really truly hungry? (The answer is almost always no. I then smile and I simply say no and move on.)
If I am actually hungry, do I have calories available to enjoy this food?
If I have available calories, then I eat an appropriately portioned amount. If no, exercise *FIRST* to earn the calories then eat the food. If exercising first isn't possible, I don't need the snack.

skruger22

Saying No gets a lot easier when you stop saying Never.

Have one cookie instead of one bag of cookies. Have a small slice of cake, not three giant slabs of cake. Have one small bag of chips, not a box of 50 small bags of chips.

Log it.

Fit it into your day.

Breathe.

Live.

This is awesome sauce! Nicely put. :drinker:

dragonlagan

For me, I try to change my perspective on what a "treat" is for my body. Am I really treating myself when I eat something that I know is not positive for my body because it will make it fat? Or am I abusing myself instead.
If I want to reward myself, why oh why would I eat that cupcake. That is not a reward. That is something that will put weight on and cause me anguish about that weight. Some reward!!
What would a better alternative be? ....

I read a very interesting quote once say 'you are not a dog, don't treat yourself with food' and it really got me thinking.
I'm not on a diet, I'm on a lifestyle change! I don't want to eat pizza 5 days a weeks, I love chicken and beef and vegetables.

Back on topic tho, I take it week by week. Everyone needs a goal to aim towards but some weeks I feel I need to push harder than others.
One day in work brownies were on the offer and I said 'Can't I got a goal this week', made no sense to the person but saying it made me resist.
On another day a rice krispy bun was on offer and because I had busted my *kitten* the week before I indulged and recorded it in my diary, when they were offered the next day I refused as I had one yesterday.
It's cause and effect, having it everyday is bad, indulging once a week won't hurt. You need a deficit of 3500 calories a week. If you have a bun at 200 calories, make it up and there isn't as much damage done.

Stay the course and if you say 'I will never...' you most certainly will. If the temptation is that big make up for it

deksgrl

I ask myself -

1. Can I fit this into my calorie goal for the day?
Yes - eat it.
No or I'm not sure - go to next question.

2. Can I fit in a 30 minute walk to create room for this?
Yes - eat it.
No or I'm not sure - don't eat it.

You don't have to say NO every time, just when it is not in your best interest.

It is easier to say no if you are not having cravings, so for some people this might mean they cannot allow themselves to have any. For others, this means they plan for room in their calorie budget for these kinds of snacks.

EBBlue10

You all are awesome. It is so nice to have people understand, and offer advice without being judgemental. Just to brag on myself a little....

I teach. This week is educator appreciation week. Yesterday there was an apple in my mailbox. Today, I was greeted by........a full size hershey bar. UGH!!!! I thought of you all and kindly gave my chocolate bar to the secretary.

Success!
Thanks again!

Trickybird

Awesome job!

IronDame

Sometimes I say no and sometimes I say yes. It's a part of life, I know I will never be able to always say no. So today I had a donut. YAY more cardio for me!

hipsdontlie1

I just try to think about how I'm going to feel afterwards rather than thinking about how it will taste. With doing this for so long, I have less cravings especially for sugary treats. I hope this helps, just remind yourself how you will feel afterwards! Although, a treat once in awhile is not that bad, just try not to look at it as a reward, I'm trying this and it's helping get rid of my emotional connection with food.

jessicawrites

It might be a good idea to brainstorm non-food treats. It sounds like a lot of the temptation to say yes is because you "deserve" it after a hard day. Maybe a bubble bath, new nail polish color, yoga class, or buying the latest iTunes song you can't get out of your head instead?

Rosered3333

I completely understand this one. I'm pregnant and so everyone thinks they should be fattening me up and everyone thinks I'm justified in overeating because I'm pregnant.

I'm not very good at this but I think it's best to eat proactively and not be hungry when the sweets and homebaked goods show up. One of my co-workers is an amazing baker and I resist her cookies by always being full and satisfied. And if I have something, I have one; not ten.

Good luck! This is a tough time of year for healthy eating!

Katla49

You all are awesome. It is so nice to have people understand, and offer advice without being judgemental. Just to brag on myself a little....

I teach. This week is educator appreciation week. Yesterday there was an apple in my mailbox. Today, I was greeted by........a full size hershey bar. UGH!!!! I thought of you all and kindly gave my chocolate bar to the secretary.

Success!
Thanks again!

I'm a retired teacher and know the system well. There are LOTS of food rewards on a regular basis. Congratulations on your fine strategy. I hope you're able to stay strong. That said, I kept a box of breakfast bars in my desk drawer for hungry students and did a pretty good job of staying out of them. I didn't do as well staying out of the treats in the break room. I'd say I gained an average of 10 pounds for every year I taught. Most summers I took a chunk back off, but the trend was always up. Now my knees hurt and I'm here getting healthier.

JanaCanada

I don't live in denial. If I want that cookie, I have it, but I make it fit within my daily calorie allowance. If I don't, then it's up to me to work it off. It's just that simple.

60x60

I play a mind game with myself. If I take the treat, I count the calories into my day. If I don't take the treat and say no thank you, I give myself a 20 calorie credit to be used on the weekend. I actually earned 800 calories one work week. I've never cashed in on the weekend for more than 240 calories. Now I don't even go for the extra treat on the weekend, I just compete with myself to see how many "no thanks" calories I earn in a week. December should be a very competitive month.

Geni_B

This is so silly. I realize that not eating something I shouldn't should be as easy as "no thank you". But....apparently it's not.

For those of you that have struggled with saying no to the cookies at work, the candy dish, the french fries on your long commute home, the "I deserve this because I had a bad day" ice cream.....

What have you done to convince yourself to stop? I know, just do it.........but that's not working for me. I feel like I need someone following me around all the time to make my food choices for me.

This is so frustrating because I have watched my mom deal with this my entire life, and from the outside, it seems so simple.......help....be kind please, I know how silly this is.

well for me it is the same way so I have to plan ahead, that means I have to take healthy snacks to work and keep them with me or in my car, I found some good clean recipes on youtube one was chick peas, draining them and then seasoning them and baking them until they are crisp kinda like corn nuts, you can go on the youtube site and type in halthy snack recipes. You can do Kale the same way in place of potato chips. Any way just an idea, or take a banana with you or any other fruit that you like. hope this helps.

dreilingda

Here's something I did that might help you before you develop the will to say no. Plan out each day's food allotment in advance, log it, and then follow the plan. That way you're not just figuring out what to eat as you go and saying no is easy because you would ruin your entire plan with that cookie or cake. Some people say moderation for sweets but I know it's tough for me to only have 1 cookie or 1 ice cream scoop etc. So when I splurge, I like to plan it so that I am in control. Execute a logical plan like this long enough and it will lead to incredibly strong will power.

tschwertley

I agree with the others. Don't always say no....allow yourself to have a treat. If you have two treats, then adjust your calorie intake later in the day. For instance, if I have a cupcake, I don't have a glass of wine later on. If I eat a fattening meal, I just do better the next day. As for executing a logical plan, just decide when you will allow yourself to have a treat. "If I eat a healthy lunch, I can have a chocolate martini later on with friends."