I seriously hate life..
Hey__Im__Krista
Posts: 124
I have had so much success for the first 6 months and its almost like i have been bumped off the wagon and it sped off, because i can't seem to get back on it anymore. I try so hard to stick to the goal and before i know it those calories are gone and im over, every day ive been over. im so tired of doing this alone, with no one really there to motivate me. I feel like such a failure. Im so depressed. its so much pressure to lose weight and im PMSing and it feels like every bite i put in my mouth its just vaporizing, I cant seem to feel satisfied anymore. I go to the gym and i dont feel like im making a bit of difference and everyone around me just eats whatever they want. And even small amounts seems to add up in calories before i know it.
I dont even know why im venting here because all thats going to end up happening is people are going to tell me just to keep trying. All the same redundant speeches they give everyone else. i fail and am alone with everything else in life, why not this too.
I dont even know why im venting here because all thats going to end up happening is people are going to tell me just to keep trying. All the same redundant speeches they give everyone else. i fail and am alone with everything else in life, why not this too.
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Replies
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Talk to your doctor. You may be suffering from depression.0
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I dont even know why im venting here because all thats going to end up happening is people are going to tell me just to keep trying. All the same redundant speeches they give everyone else. i fail and am alone with everything else in life, why not this too.
I'm not sure what you're looking for, here...0 -
Awe
do you do any form of exersise? 0 -
Won't tell you to keep trying. You've done well so far. Will tell you to stop whining!!! Guess what there are lots of people on MFP who feel the way you do. Whining gets you nowhere. Either decide to continue or decide to stop trying. You have that power, use it.
My son and I tease each other about "first world problems". Yours sounds like a "first world problem", so get off your *kitten*, be thankful you are not in an impoverished country where you are starving and be thankful that your only problem is not being "motivated"!
Lecture over! Good luck! I'm cheering for you!
Big Hugs!0 -
Talk to your doctor. You may be suffering from depression.
^^^^ This0 -
Talk to your doctor. You may be suffering from depression.
^^ yep ^^0 -
I don't want to say just get back on and tomorrow is a new day, because I know how frustrating that can be. Plus, you flat our said you aren't looking for that.
So what I CAN say and say with confidence is you are NOT alone. There are people that care about you, care about your health and care about you as a person. If right now trying to lose weight is too much stress, let it go for a little bit. Take a break. There is nothing wrong with needing a break.
The people that you are seeing that are eating whatever they want, they might not really. They could watch strictly what they eat when they aren't around other people. Or they could just be one of those lucky b*tches that can eat whatever they want. But, don't worry about them. Don't worry about what they are eating or doing, just worry about yourself. You are more important than to stress about what they are doing.
Also, if you are PMSing and you feel like you can't be satisfied no matter what you eat, eat anyway. Especially right now. If you are feeling depressed you are losing more of your "happy feelings" because you are losing blood, too (yes that is not at all scientifically worded, but I'm just saying this based on how I am). Being depressed is really hard for me when it is my time of month. I get MORE depressed.
You need to focus on yourself right now.
You can feel free to add me if you want.0 -
Hi Krista,
I know exactly how that is. In fact, I ranted about my situation a few days ago... http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/793204-i-am-an-enormous-failure
I have no speech for you or any of the same stuff that people sya to try and help. All I am going to say is I am proud of you. I am proud of you for being here and making an effort for yourself. i am proud of you for what you have accomplished in your 48 lbs lost. You are a beautiful girl. You may be alone with this, but so am I. I am alone here with my situation which sounds the same as yours. But I guess that means you are not the only one going through this and are actually not alone in this. I will listen if you want someone to talk to.
You are wonderful, and don't let the negativity that creeps in your mind tell you otherwise.
-Brian0 -
Take it easy...do something nice for yourself. You can maintain your current weight for awhile if you want - no harm done, you'll give yourself a little break from the deficit while still being careful not to eat an amount where you would regain any of what you already worked so hard to lose. If the gym doesn't make you feel good, choose a low impact exercise and maybe read a good book while you do it. Allow yourself not to feel it's all or nothing.0
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Go to your GP you sound depressed. Not going to lecture you cause in all honesty it doesn't work. If you want to give up, that's your choice, if you don't then good for you.0
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Had the same conversation with a co worker the other day. She felt the very same way as you do right now. My advice, keep going. The alternative is gaining it all back, which is not an option! Stop thinking about it and just do it. Accept that its your life now and keep on.0
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On the topic of "talk to your doctor". When was the last time you had a complete physical? Suggesting there may be some hypothiriodism here which is essentiallya slow metabolism.
Don't know your issues and the psychological component can't be ignored. I believe most of us got here as a result of poor eating and excercise choices. I also believe that there are likely other factors that contributed to what may be depression. Working on those issues as well can bring on much better results.
Not trying to push my beliefs on you but I'll be praying for you.0 -
I've definitely had days like that where all that goes through your head is that none of this matters and you are just frustrated and HUNGRY. And frustrated. I truly hope things get better for you and that you remember why you started doing this in the first place. At the least, eat on maintenance till 'that time of the month' passes and then re-evaluate.
Best of luck to you.0 -
Ultimately you are the only person who can change your life.
If you need people to make you change, you will not change.
My advice is to do some soul searching, and figure out what you want.0 -
Maybe you could just bump up to maintenance intake for now, until you are feeling better. Then, when you feel ready, cut your calories back down slowly, that way you will be eating enough to feel full, and not be so hungry and you can focus on other things.0
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Won't tell you to keep trying. You've done well so far. Will tell you to stop whining!!! Guess what there are lots of people on MFP who feel the way you do. Whining gets you nowhere. Either decide to continue or decide to stop trying. You have that power, use it.
My son and I tease each other about "first world problems". Yours sounds like a "first world problem", so get off your *kitten*, be thankful you are not in an impoverished country where you are starving and be thankful that your only problem is not being "motivated"!
Lecture over! Good luck! I'm cheering for you!
Big Hugs!
The world needs more realists. This is in my opinion the best response in this thread.
You may indeed be suffering from depression though, but only you can recover from that.0 -
First, not going to tell you to stop whining or just keep going. (I believe in whining as a form of entertainment and a means of retaining some sanity)
I also feel you may be eating less calories than you could be, but without being able to see your diary I can't tell. (1200 calories is not much, but mfp seems to think it's enough for most people) If you're like me (5' 3" 50+ pounds overweight) you might be able to go up to 1600 or so calories, especially since you're going to the gym as well. The only reason I'm bringing up calories at all is because I remember how depressingly difficult it was to try to stick to 1200. I stopped trying. Then lost 10 pounds. I remain baffled.
As for sticking to the whole weight watching thing, I believe in throwing oneself off the wagon every now and again. Also to retain some sanity. Mostly because it's fun.
So, If you WANT to keep going, try taking a weekly weight watching Sabbath (day of rest). Eat whatever. Log nothing. Care not. Then back to the grindstone. There's lots to hate about life, but it could be worse.0 -
It's always good to have someone by our side cheering you on..and that's what this website is for..but in order for you to be happy, really happy, you need to believe in yourself and not let anything stop you..determination is a powerful thing! Either people use it or not..I'm trying to be one of those who uses it..we all have our down days (especially if you're a female..lol..) but you have to keep telling yourself you're beautiful and determined..
We are all here to help!!0 -
you should just give up there is no point in trying0
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Hi Krista,
Interestingly, I just read a chapter tonight from the book "Willpower" by Roy Buameister and John Tierney that talked about how self control and glucose levels are related. It talked specifically (in Chapter 3) about PMS and the "luteal" phase, where a woman needs enough calories to make up for a loss of energy that is directed to the female reproductive system. So, along with everything else PMS can bring (mood swings, irrational actions and thoughts, etc....), there is a craving for more food often times--which conflicts with the desire to lose weight. The books suggests that women do not get enough calories during this time. (PMS = Pass me sweets).
Anyway, you may have been using "PMSing" to describe how you are feeling overall--not just certain times. (What would I know--I'm a guy). But I thought it may be helpful to point out that you may be dealing with a need for more glucose at certain times, and more calories just at the time you feel the worst. It also talked about how fruits, nuts and vegetables will provide a more longer lasting and steady energy burn as they are "low glycemic" foods.
Hang in there!
Bill0 -
Frankly, we are ALL alone in this. We may have husbands and wives, parents and siblings, extended family and friends, all of whom support us...but after all is said and done, we only have ourselves to count on to to what it takes. No one can lose this weight FOR us.
Sure, it's nice to be encouraged by others who walk this journey, but when the computer gets shut off for the day, all you have is you...so you better be the best YOU that you can be. That means taking care of yourself spiritually and mentally as well as physically. No one is one dimensional...we have to nourish our souls as well as our bodies. If you think you may suffer from depression, then see your doctor. Lots of meds out there can help, many of which can help supress appetite and make your weight loss journey more bearable. Spiritually, you can join a church or, if you're not into religion, then volunteer at the homeless shelter or do something else that makes you feel good about yourself. Take up a new hobby. Go back to school or just take a night course. Pamper yourself...it's OK, you deserve it! Get a massage, facial, mani/pedi....whatever. You need to start making yourself a priority.0 -
Congratulations! It sounds like you've discovered something that doesn't work. Believe it or not, this is a significant achievement. Cross it off the list and move on.
I recommend taking an Edison approach and trying something different. If you were doing weights, switch to cardio. If you were doing weights & cardio, switch to sprints. If you were doing low-cal, switch to low-carb or low-fat.
Maybe YOU are not the problem? Maybe you just need to try something different.0 -
What some of the other posters are saying regarding depression could be a concern. It's hard to be physically "there" if you are dealing with your mind. It can take a lot of energy.
Your diary is closed... I know you're just venting but if you want some real advice and not just patronizing platitudes, open it up. Judging from your 6 month loss you're trying to lose 2 lbs a week... Here are some serious questions to consider:
What kind of caloric deficit are you trying establish? Trying to lose super fast for long long periods of time will end up with you struggling against yourself. Did you try eating at maintenance (for your current weight) for a week or two to reset your metabolism before attempting to lose more? It can also be a mental break from the grind of dieting.
Sometimes taking a break from the loss is the best way to proceed. How is your protein intake? are you getting enough dietary fats? Both protein and fat are important to feeling satiety, to help you feel full for longer. If you're eating a lot of carbs, they can in some cases make you feel hungrier as your body burns through them.
Just some thoughts. Great job so far, but try to use your willpower to keep your motivation up. Maybe give this article a read http://www.builtlean.com/2012/10/15/willpower/
Best of luck!0 -
Quit... if this is so damn hard quit... and when you come back gaining back the 49 pounds you have already lost back you can make a post about how horrible it is to have to start over because you gave up.
No one ever said weightloss is fun, or easy or anything like that. Frankly it sucks at times - especially if the scale gets stuck. Only you can make you do this, no one else can it sounds like you are tired of doing this so switch it up, if you want to eat the foods you love do so - I sure due but when I am done cooking it I portion it out into single portions and what I am not going to eat goes right in the freezer - cookies, cakes etc are all like this even my regular meals. If I want chips i buy the small bags, chocolate bars I eat them too I save the chips and chocolate bars for weekends, and ONLY if I have behaved myself all week (its a reward of sorts) if I have been horrible and eaten over my calories every day there is no chocolate bar waiting for me on saturday because I sure don't deserve it (this is what works for me).0 -
I dont lecture ppl.. Put on ur big girl bloomers and either find motivation and get off your *kitten* and do something about y ur depressed, or sit and mope around. Its ur choice. But to loose 48 lbs, that takes lots of motovation. So u probaly have it in u. Just tap into it.0
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No lectures from me.
You've already lost a lot of weight! Keep going! I agree w/ some of the others that maybe you should see a doctor about your depression. Or maybe you've been doing this for awhile and there's some burnout/boredom. Keep it fun, but above all,
BE KIND TO YOURSELF. :flowerforyou: Good luck. You are not alone.
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Hi Krista,
Interestingly, I just read a chapter tonight from the book "Willpower" by Roy Buameister and John Tierney that talked about how self control and glucose levels are related. It talked specifically (in Chapter 3) about PMS and the "luteal" phase, where a woman needs enough calories to make up for a loss of energy that is directed to the female reproductive system. So, along with everything else PMS can bring (mood swings, irrational actions and thoughts, etc....), there is a craving for more food often times--which conflicts with the desire to lose weight. The books suggests that women do not get enough calories during this time. (PMS = Pass me sweets).
Anyway, you may have been using "PMSing" to describe how you are feeling overall--not just certain times. (What would I know--I'm a guy). But I thought it may be helpful to point out that you may be dealing with a need for more glucose at certain times, and more calories just at the time you feel the worst. It also talked about how fruits, nuts and vegetables will provide a more longer lasting and steady energy burn as they are "low glycemic" foods.
Hang in there!
Bill
ermagherd. a boy who speaks period. woot!
seriously, great, interesting response!0 -
You've lost 46 pounds, I certainly wouldn't call that a failure! I still have a hell of a lot of hard work to do to lose that much, I can't wait until I can get on here and say I've lost 46 pounds, I reckon I will be very proud of myself, as you should be!
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everyone gets in that frame of mind once in a while (especially with the "holidays" approaching) --- no one here can do it for you ... Only you can make the decision to continue - I hope you do you have made progress all ready. Remember why you are doing this AND DO IT. Living life is hard quitting is easy --- which will you choose?0
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Here's what I suggest to remind yourself of why it's worth keeping at it:
Do something nice for yourself (get a haircut, facial, etc.) and put on your favorite outfit. Take a picture of yourself.
Now compare that picture to one taken before you started losing weight.
Think about everything you can do now that you couldn't do before... the distance you can run, the weight you can lift, the stairs you can climb... think about the fact that you're not just losing weight, you are making your body stronger and faster and more efficient.
If you still feel like none of the effort is worth it and you still hate life, go talk to a doctor about it. You have a lot to be proud of, and losing sight of that would be folly.0
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