What's the meanest thing someone said to you?
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1) I've always danced,...ballroom,salsa,hip hop,..etc..,my Mom says Wow!!.I cant get over how agile you are for being so big,or ya know a "larger" woman,!!!....I was 180lbs. at the time,.NOT..bed bound for cryin out loud!!
2) Years ago as a teen,.. my big bro(who I love like a Dad) once said ,Damn Ame,...u might wanna slow down on the icecream....,when his wife spoke up & said leave her alone..she Has a small waist,(28)....she just has really BIG HIPS!(36)...He
says "I'll say 50 footer!!! laugh,laugh.laugh- I was 15,...and cried that night.
3) Mom putting me on my very first diet - at age 10. Nothing needed to be "said"0 -
I don't know that it's 'mean' as such, but it's definitely tactless. Said by a very competitive friend to me when it was apparent I was losing weight [in an effort to sabotage my efforts and rationalize her own weight issues]: "Even though we're the same weight, nobody would guess that we weigh the same, because of our shapes." Meaning: Because I have big boobs and a smaller waist, I look thinner than you.
REALLY?! LOL!
I can hardly wait until I weight significantly less than this person. How will she rationalize being overweight then?
Hollycat0 -
Remember this is coming from a 5'10" guy who weighed 320lbs.....If you are fat you are fat! I tell people i went from a fat pig to just fat and will soon be normal sized.`
All the crap fat people say, even me in the past, about being comfortable with their wieght, or this is who I am; know deep down they are kidding themselves.
The best thing my doctor said to me is you MUST lose some weight, you are way to heavy.
I am now down alomost 55 lbs and feel so much better.
If you don't like what people say then change your lifestyle to a more healthy one and lose the weight.
You know -- you folks that come in here to tell others to suck it up and take the comments as motivation, don't you see that that's why people are on MFP in the first place?
It's wonderful that you all have the most amazing self-esteem that you don't let comments hurt you. Obviously, they hurt other people.
Move along, now.0 -
(picture Korean accent) My best friends mom: WOW you so big for 16
Old deaf FAT aunt from Mississippi: Your legs so big, why your legs so big ( I was 14 and weighed 135 lbs at 5'6") Normal weight.0 -
I went into Victoria Secret when I was smaller than I am now. I had to have been a size 18 at most. When I asked what the largest size they had was the employee looked me up and down with a sneer. I was told 'Oh honey you need to look somewhere else. The only thing you'll fit into are granny panties.' I wanted to slap her. Instead I demanded a manager and proceeded to file a major complaint. I can't stand attitudes like that.0
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karma's a *****!
Hollycat0 -
I walked into the retail store I used to work at and before saying hello, one of my former co-workers came up to me and said "WOW! You've gained a LOT of weight!" I just wanted to punch him in the face. He's the kind of person that likes to instigate and gossip, but that just really really hurt.0
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There are just so many I don't know that I can pick just one...here are two that completely changed my life/way of thinking...
A then-boyfriend "God is punishing you for dabbling in witchcraft" in response to me having emergency lifesaving surgery. (To whit, I didn't *dabble* I studied it for knowledge and had friends who were self proclaimed witches)
A guy who I was interested in dating a year after his last phone call to me, I asked "how come you never called me back?" His reply, "You were just so damn hot I figured you'd be long gone." *sigh* I got really pissed off about this. Was I thin? Yes. Did I dress nice? Yes. Am I a decent, caring, fun loving person? Oh, hell yes. Am I vain? Only about my legs and eyes. Did I tell a mutual friend of ours that "sure I'd love to go out with him and get to know him?" You bet your sweet *kitten* I did. The moron.0 -
{{{{{
HUGS to everyone for mean things said--I literally can feel "some" of your pain I say "some of your pain, because the Bible says "no man "TRULY" knows another person's pain. I agree with that :flowerforyou:
Reading these replies makes my heart hurt for you all. I'm so sorry!
What life has taught me (and I haven't "mastered" the lessons in the least, I'm still learning), but I like to look at this type of meanest as a blessing in disguise as sheer unadulterated pain and a shove to do something about it--if at all possible. I try to look at meanest as the cliche "what does kill you will make you stronger and others like this:
"You shall know the truth, and the truth will MAKE you free"--Jesus
“Pain is only what you allow it to be”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes
You know why we live in a world full of lies and deception? Because the truth hurts. People seem to believe lies like it's nothing but when I'm blatantly honest and it's not what they wanna hear they convince themselves it's a lie. Life doesn't stop for anybody. The sooner you accept the reality of whatever situation you may be in the happier you will be. Brian Zilinek quotes
“The keenest sorrow is to recognize ourselves as the sole cause of all our adversities.”
― Sophocles
The truth hurts but making the right choice is harder..
“Forgiveness has nothing to do with absolving a criminal of his crime. It has everything to do with relieving oneself of the burden of being a victim--letting go of the pain and transforming oneself from victim to survivor.”
― C.R. Strahan
The truth hurts but it doesn't kill. The lie pleases but it doesn't heal.
“Turn your wounds into wisdom.”
― Oprah Winfrey
Truth hurts - not the searching after; the running from!
“Pain will leave you, when you let go”
― Jeremy Aldana
“Behind every beautiful thing, there's some kind of pain.”
― Bob Dylan
“When someone stabs you it's not your fault that you feel pain.”
― Louise Penny,
OK, so truth hurts - but what else does truth do?--Teena Marie
“And so I wait. I wait for time to heal the pain and raise me to me feet once again - so that I can start a new path, my own path, the one that will make me whole again.”
― Jack Canfield
The truth hurts for a little while, but lies hurt forever.
- Eileen Parra
“The cure for pain is in the pain.”
― Rumi
I was running toward my dreams, tripped over reality and hit my head on the truth
- Unknown
“In order to rise from its own ashes, a Phoenix first must burn.”
― Octavia E. Butler
its easy to believe someone
when they’re telling you
exactly what you wanna hear
- Unknown
“Don't make light of any man's pain.”
― Patricia Briggs,0 -
Oh, and one more comment. An acquaintance once told me: "Girl, you got some fat thighs on you!" I went off by myself and cried and cried. Turns out that he thought big thighs were the pinnacle of beauty on a woman. (and I wasn't even overweight at the time - maybe 140 pounds)
Sometimes the insult you think you hear isn't meant that way at all.0 -
A boy in junior high told me I was shaped like a brick, geez thanks. Or that I have HUGE thighs or calves.
Now its comments like, "Boy you better be careful so the wind doesn't blow you away" or people telling my husband he should get his "poor tiny wife out of the cold before she freezes to death" pretty sure I'm not a child and that I can take care of myself or that the wind isn't going to blow a 100 pound object away--snarky comments like that really irk me.0 -
Remember this is coming from a 5'10" guy who weighed 320lbs.....If you are fat you are fat! I tell people i went from a fat pig to just fat and will soon be normal sized.`
All the crap fat people say, even me in the past, about being comfortable with their wieght, or this is who I am; know deep down they are kidding themselves.
The best thing my doctor said to me is you MUST lose some weight, you are way to heavy.
I am now down alomost 55 lbs and feel so much better.
If you don't like what people say then change your lifestyle to a more healthy one and lose the weight.
You know -- you folks that come in here to tell others to suck it up and take the comments as motivation, don't you see that that's why people are on MFP in the first place?
It's wonderful that you all have the most amazing self-esteem that you don't let comments hurt you. Obviously, they hurt other people.
Move along, now.
i'll defend what he said to some extent.
1) remember that men and women talk differently. men have less empathy than women. we like to "solve" problems and answer questions that way. we don't commiserate well.
2) this is a fitness site and i think that poster took that into account with his answer. everyone here should be past the point of making excuses.
PS - i have empathy, but that's only because i'm awesome in every way. :bigsmile:0 -
I know the feeling, I had gained so much weight between the last time I saw my Mom and the next time, when I went home to visit her,she lived about 400 miles from me and I was going to surprise her and didn't tell her I was coming. When I got there and knocked on the door, she wouldn't let me in at first. When she finally did she said, " You have gotten so fat I didn't recognize you."
It took all I had to not burst into tears. Sometimes people just open their mouth without a thought of what is coming out.0 -
Oh..there's a bunch of them.
My mother tried to get me to get surgery for years, and for some reason it really hurt me.Kind of...'Wow my being fat bothers you so much you'd let me go under the knife?' (NOT bashing anyone who's had surgery, I was just too afraid, I have an extreme fear of hospitals and being put under.)
I realize now that she was worried about my health, and it IS horrible... but trying to push me into something I don't want to do...well I don't react well to it. She's very happy I'm doing it on my own now.
At the gym I was on the treadmill and some 'bros' said 'Wow that poor treadmill, what's the weight limit on those things?'
And because I'm an apple I've been asked when I'm due like two billion times. I used to lie and give a fake date because I was too embarrassed. Haven't gotten those comments in a while though!
Mean people do suck though- I wish they'd just stay in their little 'elite' circles and leave me alone. I find that wearing black and having headphones in the entire time I'm at the gym helps. They might be saying it, but I don't hear it. If I don't hear it- it doesn't matter.
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Because of my poochy stomach, I get "Oh, when is the baby due?"...which was tolerable when I was younger...but damn, I'm 53-freakin'-years-old now! Get a clue, y'idiots! :huh:
:laugh:0 -
The meanest thing anyone ever said to me was "I will," after I proposed. That is now number one on the list of things I will never say again.0
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When are you due?
>.<
I have had that one a few times!!!! it's the worst!!!!0 -
Mine really wasn't a weight thing, but I believe it created an eating disorder.
I started breaking out with acne when I was about 8 years old. Yes, 8. I have been seeing derms on and off for a very long time. I was called pizza face, ugly, etc.
The worst was when my grandma created "cures." She told me to put fermented (rotten) strawberries on my face. She even told me to put first morning URINE on my face. When I refused her "cures" she told me that I was just going to keep ruining my skin. I love her more than anything, but she actually did those things.
When I turned 16, I decided that I COULD control my weight and I got very skinny. I figured if I was very skinny, then people wouldn't notice my face as much. I ended up in a treatment center and the rest is history.
My skin is MUCH better now, and looking back I don't think it was ever as bad as I imagined.0 -
People can be so cruel
I've had so many.
Ones that have been embedded in my brain are:
"breathe in Stephanie is coming through"
"awh Steph you're not fat...you're obese"
"you shouldn't go ice skating you'll break the ice"
And my personal favourite
"Steph, you're pretty, clever, your personality is great....you're just fat"
It's all these words that make me stronger and want to succeed and lose the weight.
We can all do this and make people think twice about saying things. We are who we are and we are amazing.0
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