So I need advice... Dont judge

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Brianna72994
Brianna72994 Posts: 887
in Chit-Chat
I never thought I'd have to resort to MFP message boards for advice, but I just need someone to talk to.


Let me start off by introducing myself. My name is Brianna, i'm 18 years old. I have been dating this guy for about 4 months now, he is 16 almost 17. We used to be really close, we would hang out a few days a week and we would text 24/7. He was really special to me, I felt like I could really open up to him. I love him alot. For the past couple of days, it's like he just stopped caring. He started asking for more space, and just acting distant. I dont think there is another girl, he doesnt really talk to other girls (and I was his very first girlfriend). Today, he broke up with me. Obviously I'm devastated, and this is where I need your help. I'm not sure what to do. Should I give up and move on (although I REALLY dont want to, especially since I have bad luck with men) or should I give him a couple days and then try to talk to him again? Please help, any advice is welcome.
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Replies

  • Charlie003
    Charlie003 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    1. Relax.
    2. Breath
    3. Give it a few days.
    4. Do not let it consume your life. He is young. Probably short attention span. Like all guys that age. Ask him starait out what the deal is, then move on. You are young, go have fun.
  • jmc0806
    jmc0806 Posts: 1,444 Member
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    ^ exactly. Guys at his age have no idea what they want... Give it a few days

    And sorry, it sucks when that happens
  • Brianna72994
    Brianna72994 Posts: 887
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    Are you saying I should give it a few days and then try to talk to him?

    Honestly I'm hoping he will change his mind.
  • JessieGurlJb
    JessieGurlJb Posts: 441
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    Sorry about that babe! But to be honest "hes just not that in to you" don't lower your self or hold on to someone who isnt into you. Men are very simple and direct if they want you theyll work for it, if not move on. Dont waste your time your very young there are so many others! Good luck on your journey.
  • DeltaHappens
    DeltaHappens Posts: 10 Member
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    No means no. The world is too vast to waste a single moment being around someone who does not want to be around you. Consider it his loss and never look back. He'll come back around and say he's sorry and he made a mistake. Never live your life for another man (or woman). Set your personal path and move towards it. Eventually you'll find the right person who wants to come along for the ride and it will be a truly great adventure from that point on. Just my two cents. :-)
  • Charlie003
    Charlie003 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    Sorry about that babe! But to be honest "hes just not that in to you" don't lower your self or hold on to someone who isnt into you. Men are very simple and direct if they want you theyll work for it, if not move on. Dont waste your time your very young there are so many others! Good luck on your journey.

    I agree with this.
  • Viveyp21
    Viveyp21 Posts: 65 Member
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    1. Relax.
    2. Breath
    3. Give it a few days.
    4. Do not let it consume your life. He is young. Probably short attention span. Like all guys that age. Ask him starait out what the deal is, then move on. You are young, go have fun.
    i second that!
  • scottbrown78
    scottbrown78 Posts: 142 Member
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    Move on. Don't try to contact him, it makes you look clingy/needy, and neither one of those are attractive.
  • Charlie003
    Charlie003 Posts: 1,333 Member
    Options
    1. Relax.
    2. Breath
    3. Give it a few days.
    4. Do not let it consume your life. He is young. Probably short attention span. Like all guys that age. Ask him starait out what the deal is, then move on. You are young, go have fun.
    i second that!

    The problem is, the heart wants what it wants. You need to override your feelings with logic.
  • Brianna72994
    Brianna72994 Posts: 887
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    Move on. Don't try to contact him, it makes you look clingy/needy, and neither one of those are attractive.

    I dont try to be clingy or needy or anything like that. It is just so hard to move on, when that person is basically the most important thing in your life. All my friends are away at different colleges, so he's basically all I have right now.
  • Charlie003
    Charlie003 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    Move on. Don't try to contact him, it makes you look clingy/needy, and neither one of those are attractive.

    I dont try to be clingy or needy or anything like that. It is just so hard to move on, when that person is basically the most important thing in your life. All my friends are away at different colleges, so he's basically all I have right now.

    We have all been there. It is not easy. Growing pains. He was no Mr. Right, He was Mr. right Now. You need to be a trooper and move on. It stinks, it is hard, and it is not fun. Step by step. Just do not do anything stupid to yourself.
  • Linli_Anne
    Linli_Anne Posts: 1,360 Member
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    You are both young. The world is big.

    It hurts yes. Change is always hard, and even harder when we aren't in control.

    When you love someone, whether it is being returned to you or not, you need to also be able to respect them and their decisions. You'll know when you are ready to truly move-on in terms of another relationship, and if this was your first love, you'll never really forget. Maybe in time you'll be friends, maybe you'll drift apart. None of these events need to define you. Have a cry, have a bath, have a cookie - whatever. Start a new activity - go to the bookstore or library, or coffee shop. Bring your laptop. Find something for you, because when you are confident and happy with yourself, it shows and it attracts all kinds of good people for your life - both friends and lovers.

    It's OK to hurt.
  • ShannonMichelle1985
    ShannonMichelle1985 Posts: 47
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    I would just give it time... You know the saying, If you love them let them go and if they come back they were always yours... Or something like that. I know its hard and im sorry that happened but I would just let him have some time. Maybe he will change his mind, But if you call him and stuff you may push him farther away. If he does not come around then move on... There is a guy out there that will want to spend all his time with you. Sometimes you have to date a few wrong guys to find the Mr.Right
  • BEERRUNNER
    BEERRUNNER Posts: 3,049 Member
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    Truth is he's already moved on!!!! you were the flavor of the month...........at that age guys just wanna have fun!!! Hit it n quit it style!!!:devil:
  • Brianna72994
    Brianna72994 Posts: 887
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    Truth is he's already moved on!!!! you were the flavor of the month...........at that age guys just wanna have fun!!! Hit it n quit it style!!!:devil:

    I guess I should add he never "hit it"
  • zentha1384
    zentha1384 Posts: 323 Member
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    My mom used to always tell me this

    If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they’re yours; if they don’t they never were.

    Give him space, if you are worried something else is going on in a week or two let him know if he needs someone to talk to that you are still there for him. Otherwise do not contact him.

    I had a similar experience with a guy, turns out he wasn't comfortable with who he was and didn't like being labeled by others with how they viewed me and him compared to me (he was shorter than I am and didn't like the fact that people noticed and commented about his height more when he was seen with me). People at that age are very influenced by what others think, peer pressure and all that. If he this is what is going on, and he isn't willing to take crap from others for being with you then he wasn't good enough for you :)

    It isn't the end of the world it is just the end of a chapter in the book that is your life, characters can always come back but sometimes they are gone for good.
  • AimersBee
    AimersBee Posts: 775 Member
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    Truth is he's already moved on!!!! you were the flavor of the month...........at that age guys just wanna have fun!!! Hit it n quit it style!!!:devil:

    I guess I should add he never "hit it"

    and BEERRUNNER is going to say, that's why he moved on.. right beerrunner?
  • missjoci
    missjoci Posts: 412 Member
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    I can't tell you how many times this has happened to me. He's just not that into you. If you keep thinking about him and hoping he'll come back, you'll probably be waiting a long time. (I don't know your situation, it's just not likely) Go have fun with the girls, flirt, watch some funny movies, and try to slowly move away from him. I know it's hard. I'm stuck where you are too, so I understand the uncertainty and pain you're going through. Eventually it gets easier the longer you're away from them. Since he's young there could be so many reasons. The best you can do is focus on yourself and let whatever happens happen.

    Best of luck sweety. We'll all be rootin for ya!
  • AimersBee
    AimersBee Posts: 775 Member
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    1. Relax.
    2. Breath
    3. Give it a few days.
    4. Do not let it consume your life. He is young. Probably short attention span. Like all guys that age. Ask him starait out what the deal is, then move on. You are young, go have fun.
    i second that!

    The problem is, the heart wants what it wants. You need to override your feelings with logic.

    Agreed.
  • BEERRUNNER
    BEERRUNNER Posts: 3,049 Member
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    Truth is he's already moved on!!!! you were the flavor of the month...........at that age guys just wanna have fun!!! Hit it n quit it style!!!:devil:

    I guess I should add he never "hit it"

    and BEERRUNNER is going to say, that's why he moved on.. right beerrunner?


    You know it!! :bigsmile:

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