Anxiety / Anger

2

Replies

  • elprincipito
    elprincipito Posts: 1,200 Member
    feel the same...this is why i became really good at beating the hell up out of boxing bags and speedbags. Once i am there i feel so relaxed and it's fun (especially the speedbag as it requires concentration)
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
    Give diaphragmatic breathing a chance. When you have anxiety the stress hormones enter your system. They go away when you are able to calm down.

    It does not seem like it at first but the breathing works and there is science to back it up.

    http://my.clevelandclinic.org/disorders/chronic_obstructive_pulmonary_disease_copd/hic_diaphragmatic_breathing.aspx
  • Pixi_Rex
    Pixi_Rex Posts: 1,676 Member
    Wil Wheaton said this:

    I haven’t ever felt suicidal, but I do have Depression and Anxiety. I suffered for no good reason for decades, until I couldn’t reconcile my awesome life with feeling terrible all the time. Talking therapy wasn’t ever enough for me, and I was very resistant to medication, because I believed (and continue to believe) that we are an over-medicated culture.

    But, still, I wouldn’t just sit around and suffer if I had a treatable non-mental illness, so I went to a doctor, and I got better. Now, I take some medication every morning, and it has made all the difference in my life.

    I remember the first week after I started meds, Anne and I were out for a walk. I felt her hand in mine, and realized that I didn’t have any lingering tension or unhappiness just buzzing around in my skull. I was just enjoying a walk with my wife, and holding her hand.

    And I began to cry, because I was so happy.

    “It’s like I was in a loud room for so long, I didn’t know how loud it was,” I said, “and all I have now is the ringing in my ears.”

    She squeezed my hand and I said, “I’m going to remember that ringing in my ears, so I never go back into that room again.”

    That was about four years ago, and I’m happy to say that I’ve stayed out of the room. I can actually enjoy my friends, my family, and my life. I have bad days from time to time, but I know they’ll pass, and — most important of all — I may have Depression, but Depression doesn’t have me. I know that’s sort of corny, but it’s pretty accurate, too.

    So, please, if you or someone you know suffer from Depression — with or without thoughts of suicide — please talk to someone, and get help from a doctor. As Jenny says, Depression lies, and you don’t need to let it control your life.

    Will Wheaton and Jenny Lawson are the sole reason I went to the Dr. I talked to him, I was put on anti-depressants, I did talk therapy and guess what. 2 years later I am still off my medication (my Dr. took me off them to see if I could cope and I haven't had to go back since) , I still do talk therapy , I eat a good diet, I work out and I am able to smile and laugh and not hate the entire world around me. I Do have times where I want to crawl in a hole and die still and those are the times my therapist sees me the most. I have come close to going back on my medication twice but was able to work through the dark hole on my own.

    Please OP if you can go talk to your Dr. try several different medications if you need to, do the therapy if you think it will help but do not live in anger and anxiety I did it for many years of my life and I can tell you they were he hardest years I have ever had. Just because one medication didn't work doesn't mean there isn't one that wont.
  • MissJanet55
    MissJanet55 Posts: 457 Member
    Meditation might help. It's worth a shot, and sure won't hurt. There is a teacher called John Kabat Zinn who uses meditation in conjunction with anxiety issues and health problems. If you're uncomfortable because of the "woo woo" element, he approaches it from a very Western point of view.

    I hope you find something that works for you. Sometimes it takes some shopping around to find the thing that works for you, and sometimes it's just time - you might need to wait it out.
  • nicehormones
    nicehormones Posts: 503 Member
    I get the same way. Endorphins really can only take you so far, though. I've lived mostly my entire life being angry at everything and everyone. I think as you get older, you're perspective of the world just changes. Like if I drop something on the ground in the morning in the kitchen that I have to clean up (I am not a morning person), I will sometimes get so furious that it has a domino effect on the rest of my day. It's stupid and ridiculous, and I know it. However, when I am in a good mood and actually TRY and look at the good things, I find that good things happen to me. I do better at work and make more money when I care less about *kitten* customers. My real only current problem in life is money... Hey, isn't everyone in that boat right now? If that's my WORST problem in my life, what do I really have to be angry about? I must be doing pretty well. I have noticed time and time again, the more I make an EFFORT at being GRATEFUL for the things I do have in my life, the happier I become. I've also learned to stop taking things so damn personally. What's the point in anger? It takes too much effort to be mad and upset all the time. I'm sorry I can't offer any specifics to help you. But maybe just trying to see things from a different perspective will help.
  • LovelyLifter
    LovelyLifter Posts: 560 Member
    joint-smoke.jpg

    :love:
  • I've been dealing with depression, anxiety & panic for the past 7 years ongoing. I know what you're going through.

    Unfortunately, there is no little pill that will get rid of any of what you are experiencing. My doctor has put me on pretty much all of them now (and I could go into great detail of each of them but I won't).

    What I've found has worked, combined with my medication (which really only help with the panic and depression):

    1. Therapy. If you aren't happy with your therapist, find another. You have to find someone you are comfortable with & that you can trust.
    2. Tell your doctor what isn't working. BE FIRM. You know your body better than anyone. Too many people are too complacent with their mental illness.
    3. Watch your diet. I have a list of foods I avoid as they trigger my panic attacks.
    4. Exercise. It really does help. I hate to exercise but I've been noticing how much it has been helping me the past month now that I've been rather consistent with it.
    5. Meditation. You don't have to get all new-age on it. There are basic meditation and deep breathing exercises you can practice, just sitting on bed as soon as you get up or before you fall asleep.

    I also post daily affirmations here, there and everywhere (probably much to the annoyance of my social media friends and followers).

    I've also been thinking of investing in a punching bag, as I have anger issues too. So far, just working out to music and all that has been helping.

    Good luck!
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    I haven't read all the comments. You don't have to answer this question here, but do you know if there is something that you are angry about? I went through something really horrible when I was a child, for a long time, and I was not able to do anything about it. I was not allowed to cry or get mad, or say stop, or anything. I had a lot of anger about knowing that I didn't want these things happening. I tried to do things to stop it, but I was a child and I was not mentally, emotionally, or physically able to defend myself against an adult (a parent). So, I learned to accept it and be obedient in an attempt to at least minimize the violence. For a long time it was difficult for me to feel anger about it because of how I had shut those feelings down and the fear I felt associated with the experiences and the person.

    But, when something would remind me of it or when I was in a safe and supportive space in my life I would have panic attacks and outbursts of feeling out of control angry. It was all of the feelings that I had about the past feelings that I had not been able to stop what was happening and that I could not express or say, but had always wanted and needed to. So, I directed it at the wrong person.

    So, for me it was not a chemical problem, I needed to let myself know that it was ok to direct the feelings to the proper place, to face those feelings and to talk it out, write it out, dance about it.

    For me that really saved my life and my relationship with my husband and allowed me to be a good mother (when I eventually became a mother).

    So, maybe it is chemical or something like that for you.

    But, if there is something you are angry about (whatever it may be, if there is something you will know what it is), dealing with that will really help you. It was the only thing that helped me. I had to learn to deal with the anger I had about the things I needed to allow myself to be angry about. And I needed to learn the skills of how to calm myself and manage my emotions in my present life (which was really very wonderful).
  • louiselebeau
    louiselebeau Posts: 220 Member
    Weed.... I wish
  • Wil Wheaton said this:

    I haven’t ever felt suicidal, but I do have Depression and Anxiety. I suffered for no good reason for decades, until I couldn’t reconcile my awesome life with feeling terrible all the time. Talking therapy wasn’t ever enough for me, and I was very resistant to medication, because I believed (and continue to believe) that we are an over-medicated culture.

    But, still, I wouldn’t just sit around and suffer if I had a treatable non-mental illness, so I went to a doctor, and I got better. Now, I take some medication every morning, and it has made all the difference in my life.

    I remember the first week after I started meds, Anne and I were out for a walk. I felt her hand in mine, and realized that I didn’t have any lingering tension or unhappiness just buzzing around in my skull. I was just enjoying a walk with my wife, and holding her hand.

    And I began to cry, because I was so happy.

    “It’s like I was in a loud room for so long, I didn’t know how loud it was,” I said, “and all I have now is the ringing in my ears.”

    She squeezed my hand and I said, “I’m going to remember that ringing in my ears, so I never go back into that room again.”

    That was about four years ago, and I’m happy to say that I’ve stayed out of the room. I can actually enjoy my friends, my family, and my life. I have bad days from time to time, but I know they’ll pass, and — most important of all — I may have Depression, but Depression doesn’t have me. I know that’s sort of corny, but it’s pretty accurate, too.

    So, please, if you or someone you know suffer from Depression — with or without thoughts of suicide — please talk to someone, and get help from a doctor. As Jenny says, Depression lies, and you don’t need to let it control your life.

    Well said and awesome! :happy:
  • binglebandit
    binglebandit Posts: 531 Member
    I try to do something that occupies my attention. If I can't concentrate on the things that bother me then I can calm down. If finals or projects are building up and it's making me anxious, I start making something. Crocheting or knitting is nice because the motions are repetitive. You can also count the stitches while you work so you are keeping your mind busy. Reading is also a great idea, though it can be hard if you're really upset.

    If it's just for a short amount of time I try to pick a relaxing song and repeat it over and over in my head trying to remember the lyrics. This helps me control my breathing. It can also be helpful to say positive things. For example, I'm terrified of shots, hence having to control my breathing so I don't faint. Thinking, "I'm so scared right now" isn't very helpful. So I try to think phrases like, "I'm fine".
  • Pamela, you just described me! I'm 35 and STILL have anger issues, and I know exactly what you mean by not being able to stop being mad. I just can't seem to let stuff go.
  • Redbird99ky
    Redbird99ky Posts: 305 Member
    I used to be terribly depressed, like took a razor to the bathtub once (and not to shave). I felt hopeless and like my life had no purpose. I met someone (ended up marrying him, lol) who introduced me to Jesus. I had heard people talk about Him, but he was the first person I had ever met that actually knew Him personally. Once I accepted Him and asked Him to come into my life and gave my life to Him it's been an upward spiral ever since! A lot of people know of God, but u gotta find Him yourself. Find a good church to start, and give Him what you are and see what He can do with it (it's amazing how far He's brought me, and I know He can do the same for you)

    ^^^ THIS!!! <3<3<3

    I was similar, suffering from suicidal depression, had been prescribed Celexa, but I didn't have anyone who really introduced me to Jesus. I had someone who told me to pray "God, IF you're there, help me" (I was an atheist). I did more than that, I said "God if you're there, show me the way". ... I didn't even think or expect anything to come of it ... but ... well, God showed up and took my depression away in a few short hours ... I have RUN towards Him ever since, and I have not had a depressed day since ... where there was anger and hate, and anxiety and angst, there is now peace and joy and love and happiness ... and peace ... did I mention peace? It's a peace that surpasses all understanding, or that "perfect peace" as in "in harmony with all of creation" Since then, I HAVE come to Christ, and instead of dreading the next day, I embrace each day as a blessing, a gift from God, to be unwrapped in His presence!

    ETA: FTR, I never filled that Celexa script ...
  • Beckycm1971
    Beckycm1971 Posts: 40 Member
    I know Jesus personally as well, and I know my life without Him would be so much more difficult because I have lived without him, but I'm not high on Him anymore. I seek Him and spend time with Him but I don't feel at peace about much of anything except knowing where I will be going when I die, and that wasn't even an issue for me. It's the day to day struggle that's so difficult. I have spent the last two years trying to find my way back to that amazing feeling of being in love with Jesus, and I can't find it. With doing everything I know I need to do, I just can't find it.
    I used to be terribly depressed, like took a razor to the bathtub once (and not to shave). I felt hopeless and like my life had no purpose. I met someone (ended up marrying him, lol) who introduced me to Jesus. I had heard people talk about Him, but he was the first person I had ever met that actually knew Him personally. Once I accepted Him and asked Him to come into my life and gave my life to Him it's been an upward spiral ever since! A lot of people know of God, but u gotta find Him yourself. Find a good church to start, and give Him what you are and see what He can do with it (it's amazing how far He's brought me, and I know He can do the same for you)

    ^^^ THIS!!! <3<3<3

    I was similar, suffering from suicidal depression, had been prescribed Celexa, but I didn't have anyone who really introduced me to Jesus. I had someone who told me to pray "God, IF you're there, help me" (I was an atheist). I did more than that, I said "God if you're there, show me the way". ... I didn't even think or expect anything to come of it ... but ... well, God showed up and took my depression away in a few short hours ... I have RUN towards Him ever since, and I have not had a depressed day since ... where there was anger and hate, and anxiety and angst, there is now peace and joy and love and happiness ... and peace ... did I mention peace? It's a peace that surpasses all understanding, or that "perfect peace" as in "in harmony with all of creation" Since then, I HAVE come to Christ, and instead of dreading the next day, I embrace each day as a blessing, a gift from God, to be unwrapped in His presence!
  • Redbird99ky
    Redbird99ky Posts: 305 Member
    I know Jesus personally as well, and I know my life without Him would be so much more difficult because I have lived without him, but I'm not high on Him anymore. I seek Him and spend time with Him but I don't feel at peace about much of anything except knowing where I will be going when I die, and that wasn't even an issue for me. It's the day to day struggle that's so difficult. I have spent the last two years trying to find my way back to that amazing feeling of being in love with Jesus, and I can't find it. With doing everything I know I need to do, I just can't find it.
    I used to be terribly depressed, like took a razor to the bathtub once (and not to shave). I felt hopeless and like my life had no purpose. I met someone (ended up marrying him, lol) who introduced me to Jesus. I had heard people talk about Him, but he was the first person I had ever met that actually knew Him personally. Once I accepted Him and asked Him to come into my life and gave my life to Him it's been an upward spiral ever since! A lot of people know of God, but u gotta find Him yourself. Find a good church to start, and give Him what you are and see what He can do with it (it's amazing how far He's brought me, and I know He can do the same for you)

    ^^^ THIS!!! <3<3<3

    I was similar, suffering from suicidal depression, had been prescribed Celexa, but I didn't have anyone who really introduced me to Jesus. I had someone who told me to pray "God, IF you're there, help me" (I was an atheist). I did more than that, I said "God if you're there, show me the way". ... I didn't even think or expect anything to come of it ... but ... well, God showed up and took my depression away in a few short hours ... I have RUN towards Him ever since, and I have not had a depressed day since ... where there was anger and hate, and anxiety and angst, there is now peace and joy and love and happiness ... and peace ... did I mention peace? It's a peace that surpasses all understanding, or that "perfect peace" as in "in harmony with all of creation" Since then, I HAVE come to Christ, and instead of dreading the next day, I embrace each day as a blessing, a gift from God, to be unwrapped in His presence!

    Daily prayer, meditation, and keeping myself in His Word helps, as does giving to Him those things I can't do anything about, and keeping the eternal perspective in sight. This is all temporary, and I need to make the best use of the gifts He has given me. If I die tomorrow, I get to be with Him, and if I don't I get to help Him do His work here on earth. I heard a pastor once say "If you know how the story ends, the plot twists are largely irrelevant" ... That helps too.
  • maqsmj
    maqsmj Posts: 697
    first you need a Boy friend if u r still single, othing can calm you down better than getting laid, Yoga, and lift some F***ing weight when u r mad, eight are the only thing that made me survive college without beating anyone xD

    meditation
  • crazytreelady
    crazytreelady Posts: 752 Member
    Give diaphragmatic breathing a chance. When you have anxiety the stress hormones enter your system. They go away when you are able to calm down.

    It does not seem like it at first but the breathing works and there is science to back it up.

    http://my.clevelandclinic.org/disorders/chronic_obstructive_pulmonary_disease_copd/hic_diaphragmatic_breathing.aspx

    This stuff. Soooo weird. I have literally sat for an hour listening to my breathing.
  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
    I run and listen to techno music.

    you sleep. I suggest taking naps if that will help.
  • I have struggled with severe depression for seven years. I know how it feels to get stuck in a world of darkness. Some things that I do to prevent emotional breakdowns and nights of frustrations are learning different workout routines, hang out with an old friend, day trips, bubble baths with music, retail therapy (:, and going on long walks. I am also a nanny, and I enjoy spending time with younger kids. I babysit for a family with three year old triplets and a seven year old. I think spending time with kids at that age range can really help those with depression because kids enjoy the simple things in life. Just enjoying the little things in life has helped me so much.
  • eatathome
    eatathome Posts: 81 Member
    With all due respect, Jesus People, mental illnesses are real, actual illnesses that are suffered by people of all walks of life (yes, even those who "know Jesus").

    If someone on these forums told someone not to get their insulin Rx filled and just take a walk with Jesus, the whole community would jump down their throats.
  • I got a wood stove. Chopping elps every day except TOM. Then I go shooting at the range.
  • Doodlewhopper
    Doodlewhopper Posts: 1,018 Member
    I am a type A and always burning with impatience. I generally keep it contained and hidden until I am on a mission. LOL I do make an ^zz of myself at times.

    I had a business failure that completely ruined me. I lost everything but my house and cars and it was due to a malicious and uncalled for reason.

    I stayed awake at night fixated on killing the dirty b who caused this, that was all I could think of.... and though I did act on my desires, he got away and left the area and hasnt been seen in years. Lucky us.

    I realized that I was going to a dark place and had to get control somehow. My brain told me it was a total waste to ruin my life over such a slug, but my heart said I still had to do it.

    One day it just came to me, find a way to physically burn my rage. I found a bicycle and rode like the possessed. I rode hard and fast and before long I left my guts on the road....and I wasnt mad anymore, i was too damn tired.... and now I had another goal, get my weary and burned out behind back to the house! LOL

    It took months, and often I had to jump on the bike several times a day. I rode on the highway so I could totally go into myself and not have to contend with some jack wagon driver getting me mad again. I started riding every day 15 miles and then going farther, 35 - 50 miles and then found a group for weekend rides. I was in the greatest shape of my adult life.

    Im not being dramatic or overstating anything. I was on the verge of ruining many lives by acting out on my rage....though I still have fantasies. LOL

    Another thing you might want to try is soothing classical music.

    Science has found that classical music soothes & reduces blood pressure, and anxiety. It also stimulates the brain into producing serotonin. Google: "classical music serotonin"

    Researchers have found links between diminished serotonin & depression. Google this also.

    I cool down from my runs listening to classical. Hopefully someone here can help with selections as my knowledge is limited. Some of the composers I know are Bach, Mozart, Chopin, Beethoven ,Pachelbel, Strauss, Rachmaninoff, Schubert.

    Try it kiddo.
  • anemoneprose
    anemoneprose Posts: 1,805 Member
    Breathing is totally underrated. It always works for me when I do it (not often enough). But sometimes it feels good to 'get out' of yourself, the situation, whatever - walking for that. Especially around green things if you can (they calm us bc patterns in the leaves/grass). Something about the rhythm, moving without strain, just works to clear my head. The fresh air helps too.

    That's for immediate calming. But your anxiety is about some thing or things, and learning to reframe how you think about them - to change the meanings you give things - really will help most (or in addition to the physical work). I'm sorry you haven't been helped by your therapists so far. There are other ways of shifting your perspective - books, films, talking to friends. I hope you find ones that help you.
  • Redbird99ky
    Redbird99ky Posts: 305 Member
    With all due respect, Jesus People, mental illnesses are real, actual illnesses that are suffered by people of all walks of life (yes, even those who "know Jesus").

    If someone on these forums told someone not to get their insulin Rx filled and just take a walk with Jesus, the whole community would jump down their throats.

    That is an extremely valid reply and statement. I know that mental illnesses ARE very real. My wife knows also, all too well, the pit I was in, and I am sure it was no picnic for her to sit and hear me talk about how I just wanted the pain to stop and the lengths I was willing to go to do so. Interestingly enough, God was not on the list of options for THIS atheist.

    I should have added that i checked with my doctor PRIOR to not taking the Celexa. He was one of the first to know about my experience. I also know that there are MANY who have a relationship with Christ who must take meds.

    I was, however, relating my experience. Apparently God saw fit to do that for me as a means of getting my attention.

    I apologize if my comments appeared to downplay the medical nature of depression.
  • gkwatra
    gkwatra Posts: 431 Member
    I have been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) - I think I have always had that disposition since I always scared easily as a child - don't know why; just high-strung I guess. What helps me, with anxiety and anger/frustration, is meditation and yoga, in conjuction with medical advice. It can be VERY hard to get to where you can control your thoughts, but it is so worth it. Yoga also helps your body and mind in a calming way. The more you practice it, the easier it will be to get your mind to that point. Breathing exercises also help greatly. Much of this is easier said than done, but it is worth it when you practice it. Hugs to you. :flowerforyou:
  • Zomoniac
    Zomoniac Posts: 1,169 Member
    I suffer bad anxiety. I find whisky helps. Note this isn't to be taken as medical advice. It just works for me.
  • gkwatra
    gkwatra Posts: 431 Member
    I am a type A and always burning with impatience. I generally keep it contained and hidden until I am on a mission. LOL I do make an ^zz of myself at times.

    I had a business failure that completely ruined me. I lost everything but my house and cars and it was due to a malicious and uncalled for reason.

    I stayed awake at night fixated on killing the dirty b who caused this, that was all I could think of.... and though I did act on my desires, he got away and left the area and hasnt been seen in years. Lucky us.

    I realized that I was going to a dark place and had to get control somehow. My brain told me it was a total waste to ruin my life over such a slug, but my heart said I still had to do it.

    One day it just came to me, find a way to physically burn my rage. I found a bicycle and rode like the possessed. I rode hard and fast and before long I left my guts on the road....and I wasnt mad anymore, i was too damn tired.... and now I had another goal, get my weary and burned out behind back to the house! LOL

    It took months, and often I had to jump on the bike several times a day. I rode on the highway so I could totally go into myself and not have to contend with some jack wagon driver getting me mad again. I started riding every day 15 miles and then going farther, 35 - 50 miles and then found a group for weekend rides. I was in the greatest shape of my adult life.

    Im not being dramatic or overstating anything. I was on the verge of ruining many lives by acting out on my rage....though I still have fantasies. LOL

    Another thing you might want to try is soothing classical music.

    Science has found that classical music soothes & reduces blood pressure, and anxiety. It also stimulates the brain into producing serotonin. Google: "classical music serotonin"

    Researchers have found links between diminished serotonin & depression. Google this also.

    I cool down from my runs listening to classical. Hopefully someone here can help with selections as my knowledge is limited. Some of the composers I know are Bach, Mozart, Chopin, Beethoven ,Pachelbel, Strauss, Rachmaninoff, Schubert.

    Try it kiddo.

    I am also a type A - and my husband went through a similar experience with a business he started with his cousin & was cheated. It helps to keep in mind that if I obsess over this b*****d and waste my physical & mental energy in him, he wins. He is not worth my life. Karma is a byotch and God will deal with him in due time. But, I will have to answer to God if I waste my life stewing over a low-life who is not worth my time.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
    Is it possible your diagnosis is wrong?

    For years, I was diagnosed with Unilateral Depression and was on antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds. They made me worse. More agitated, more jumpy, I would swing into insane rages. I was unable to physically relax, let alone mentally. A few years ago I was rediagnosed as Bi-Polar, Type 1. I was put onto mood stabilizing medications instead and suddenly things started to even out.

    For Bipolars, SSRI's can be a dangerous combination. Introducing a flood of serotonin into a mind that already has unstable levels of it floating around can increase anger, anxiety, and restlessness.
  • Speak to a doctor about anti-depressants or beta blockers. Drink teas - camomile and ginger are particularly calming. Go for long walks. Find a way to vent - for me, I vent out my stress on original writing and roleplaying (D&D, WH40K, etc). Reading a book/fanfic helps too. Exercise. I find doing something physical gets me into a kind of zen.
  • I suffer bad anxiety. I find whisky helps. Note this isn't to be taken as medical advice. It just works for me.
    Certainly not medical advice, no, but whiskey is classified as a downer, which lowers your mood. Not necessarily in a bad way - it lowers good and bad emotions, and thus I've actually found a shot of a good whiskey very relaxing as it slows my thoughts a bit.