Fighting a never ending battle. Im ready to raise the flag

WhitneyT586

Wake up every day and make the choice to do what is right. Set your alarm a half hour early and go for a walk. Don't try to cut calories too low. Eat, but eat healthy foods and allow yourself a treat every day if needed. When I started and what I'm back to doing now is protein shake for breakfast, big chicken or chef salad for lunch, 200 calorie snack of fruit and cheese or yogurt, 500 calorie dinner. I have a treat nearly every day of wine and dark chocolate. Don't try to do what every one tells you to do. You have to do what works for you and you only! Take the advice from others and combine it all into your own plan. I wish you luck and willpower!

NorthWoodsLee

Three things have helped me: 1) I read an article in The Atlantic that gave me the confidence that, despite all of my past failures, it could be done and taught me that sites like MFP are crucial; (2) I started paying attention to the glycemic load of the food I was eating. That meant to cut out processed white flours and pure sugars, to eat whole grains with at least 3 grams of fiber, and to try always to eat a protein with carbs like natural fruits and vegetables. This keeps me from craving more sugary crap; and (3) I finally gave in/quit trying to use pure will power to only eat 3 meals a day and now eat 5 or 6 small meals every day - about every 3 hours, and always try to eat a protein (e.g., a small grilled chicken breast) and a piece of fruit or a nonfat greek yogurt with blueberries or raspberries. I'm never hungry, I rarely have cravings, and I find that it's very easy to cook 5 pounds of boneless skinless chicken breasts cut in half and keep them in a baggie in the refrigerator. I take 2 or 3 with me to work in a smaller baggie, along with some greek yogurts and fruit, and I'm ready for anything. I'll mix in some salads, etc.

I just went in to far more detailed info than I intended. But the keys are: 1) truly believe you can do it - it is 100% a mental game; 2) don't eat crap that either causes a sugar rush and crash or has so many fat calories in it that if you stay under your calorie target you're always feeling deprived and starving because you can't eat anything after your fatty lunch; and 3) eat small meals often. It's worked for me. Down 83 lbs since May 14 and I'm never hungry unless it's time for one of my small meals - and then I eat.

SWilcox818

Is it possible to work out in the evenings after your son has gone to bed? Maybe your wife would enjoy working out also? There are all kinds of videos and work out equipment that can be used at home, rather than at a gym. I often have to work out after I put my daughter to bed because I'm also not a morning person. As everyone else said, just keep fighting. Weight loss is a battle and it's one we have to wage every single day. Take it one day at a time. Definitely re-evaluate your calories. I am shorter than you, weigh less and am eating more calories than 1500 and I'm losing. 17 pounds in 10 weeks. Not as fast as some people, but it's a pace I'm comfortable with. Best of luck, keep fighting!

stacy_1971

Don't you dare raise that flag!

You have a wife and child who need you, and they need you healthy! Losing weight is hard, no doubt about it. I know, you know, we all know, it's hard. Yes, there are some people who seem to lose weight quicker, but you can't compare yourself to them. Just accept that life isn't fair and own your responsibility.

Now, I doubt you have a slow metabolism if you lost 50 pounds previously. As for exercise, you're going have to bite the bullet....it's either before or after work, unless you have a lunch hour. You do have two days off, I'm assuming, in which you can also exercise.

I don't mean to come down hard on you, you seem like a nice family man, so that's why I want you to keep paddling, or whatever metaphor motivates you. Take care of you. You're worth it. You have the head knowledge, so put it to use!

britney523

Your like me , You try to dig in too deep! You want results and you want them now ! I'm learning that u have to take it slow make it about your life and not about your pant size. I am 27 and have gone up and down my whole life .. mainly up but the times I did go down I wasn't trying to lose weight as much as finding activities that I liked to do . I am very competitive and at 5' tall it's pretty hard to get anyone to take me seriously. I joined a Kickboxing gym and holy wow is it fun and BONUS calories burned. I am at the top of my up cycle right now and have made a decision today that I am going to find something I love and do it every day. Don't give it just because it's hard, make it easier and take it slower. PS I've got that same metabolism and it sucks to see everyone around you eating their little hearts out and not gaining an ounce but so what our bodies are really good at telling us whats wrong with what we are doing and if we listen to them that scale will go down and our energy will go up ! Good Luck ... Don't give up ... I'm around if you need more support !

MaxineSummer

I am 20 years older than you and must say that most of my adult life has been and still am duelling with same problems around food as you've described.

One important step is to get help in order to solve the binge eating and get emotional eating under control. Believe me unless the root of the problem isn't cured,no matter how much will power,knowledge,and disciplines you put out there, then something will trigger the head eating and the vicious circle starts.

Your age is at your advantage, so you still have time to use your metabolism and sources of help out there. One day that you don't see food as enemy that controls you,then the weight will start to come off and you'll be free of all these head games.

In the mean time just choose healthy,fresh options and instead of pushing yourself to go to the gym,just play football with your sun or friends, go swimming,walking in the parks,cycling,table tennis,bowling, trampoline with your family, and don't think what will you be eating for the next meal until you are really hungry.

cebreisch

You don't have to eat like a rabbit, but I will tell you that the higher quality of food you have, the more you can eat. One key is to not deprive yourself - that'll cause you to want to binge in a millisecond. BUT when you do have those foods that you love, don't bring them into the house. Go out to lunch...try having only half of it, or some other way perhaps to not wolf the whole thing, and don't take any home. That way you can get it out of your system. Here's my blog on some things that have helped me along the way:
http://baysweightloss.blogspot.com/2012/05/things-that-have-helped-along-way.html

My husband gets up in the mornings, or waits until the girls go to bed to do his exercise. I go to the gym on the way home, or will walk around the neighborhood before I pick them up from our neighbor's house.

One of my doctors said if there's any time to be selfish it's now, because if you don't get a little selfish, then you lessen the chances of getting to your goal - getting healthy so you can spend more quality time with your family.

You can do this!!!

Mummyadams

I work full time too. I have a family too. I am busy too. I love food too.
I get up at 5.30am to get to the gym. I say no to foods that aren't good for me. I say no to that wine after work.
I don't like to get up at 5.30am but I do. I don't know many people who wouldn't rather stay in bed.
I do it - and so can you.

MeganGable

Keep your head up buddy! Ok? I'm beginning my weight loss journey for the zillionth time. I never give up trying though...are your priorities in order for yourself? Are there time-sucking activities you can take out of your day??? That's what I did. Do you watch tv? Get rid of the cable, I don't have it anymore and i don't really miss it, but I'm much less getting sucked into stuff and find other things to do that focus on me and my husband. And it saves money! Don't waste time on facebook, I got rid of that crap too. I focus on myself now. I even got rid of my iphone (which I do miss sometimes, but I have an ipad I do play on a little bit each day here and there). I come on myfitnesspal. Literally, get rid of all things that you can and youll be able to zero in your focus on you/health, your wife, and child more. I promise! Eat less meat and cheese! AND less bread/pasta. Only eat WHOLE WHEAT pastas and breads. Get ezekiel or genesis bread....its a little more expensive but sooooo helpful to digestion and you don't feel clogged all the time! Cool it on the salt!!! Salt your own foods so you know how much your putting in. Only eat out like once a week or less.

ktsmom430

Maybe try to approach this from a different angle. My daughter is your age. My biggest regret is not doing this when she was little so I could do more with her when she was growing up. Do it for your son, your wife and yourself. All things are possible with determination and perseverance. You can do this, and you and your family are worth it. Little steps. Attainable short term goals. One day at a time. You will be surprised at how quickly the months go by, and the goals and challenges that you meet and surpass. The very best of luck to you.

BloodGeist

All I can say is wow....I was not expecting this much help and support. It does light a fire under my *kitten* to get up and go.

I know it says 1500 calories in my plan but thats because I havent adjusted it since ive come back on. I was actually doing 1800 calories. I would consume 1800 + my excersize calories which ranged from 300-800 a day in the past. So i would actually consume about 2100-2600.

I knoq my biggest fuel is for my wife and my son (also have twins on the way ^^) . I want to keep up with my children and set a great example. I want to be by them the entire way and not have to stop and suck wind because I am out of shape.

I am going to head to bed early tonight and get up and go. I know I need to. Thank you everyone for the motivation and support. I am going to keep in touch and with updates.

Tommy_Valentine

"I just feel like i cant do it. I am stuck in this vicsious never ending cycle and rut. I am just so tired of it and how it is such a hard struggle for me. I am so tired of it."

"Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right." - Henry Ford
Before anything, you need to completely change your mindset. If you THINK that you can't do something, you can't. I definitely think you should motivate yourself first before attempting anything.

jlohcook

For find - plan ahead, including those snacks you wanna eat. Not in plan, don't take it or chek f you have extras to spare.

For time, I work full time, have a kid too, not a morning person too. So, what I do is workout at night after dinner on week days, and morning on weekends, and weekends I usually do more, burning more calories to make up for the week.

It's all about setting your mind to it. Go do it, you can.

Whitebone

I've found things that are sweet or that I like that are surprising Low in calories and something I just will never try again. For a while I was eating no fat cottage cheese( high in salt but I have constant levels of low sodium). It was just like eat some kind of nasty medicine I did it for about a month and said forget it. Some days are going to be hard. Those days I try to exercise more. If you don't have time to fit in exercise start small. Like they say "take the stairs and not the elevator." I tell my friend who has owns her business and has 7 kids, you don't have to spend an entire hour on the eliptical try 15 minutes if that's what you have time for. I have enjoyed raking leaves. Burns a ton of calories and its not really exercise.

Some days you will slip and go for the forbidden but tomorrow's a new day. I'm still learning if I cheat on my diet not to blow the entire day. One day under stress I bought a donut I said what the heck you get a discount when you get two and I ruined my calorie count for the day. I should of had one instead I had two at a total of 700 calories. Not a good choice.

Good luck just keep moving
Hope

Crazy4Healthy

Your diary states that your daily goal is 1500 calories, and that you are a 28 year old male. Depending on your height, it sounds like you are trying to restrict your calories too low, and it's causing frustration that results in overeating. Try calculating your TDEE and subtracting 15% to get your daily goal -- I bet it's way more than 1,500/day and you can still lose weight.

I agree with this, you may be eating too little and leaving you hungry. Hunger may lead to binging and then frustration with yourself. Take a look at your goals and re-evaluate, this may help remove one of the time obstacles you feel you face. Losing weight is 99% diet. while exercise is great and I highly recommend it, if you get your diet in order you will still lose weight.

kiachu

Full time job
Full time mother
Full time wife
Full time home keeper
Full time physique competitor
Full time foodie
Full time want it

You have to organize your life and fit this into it. If that means joining a 24 gym and going after the kids are asleep, do that, if it means waking up early, do that. My 24 hour gym just closed down on me so I had to join one farther away but it has childcare so had to make some adjustments, but I made them.

Have a plan, put it in the roadmap that is your daily existence. Just like I got to work everyday from 8-5, I got to the gym from 5-6:30. It's an extension of my day. I don't have an option for skipping out on work for no reason I don't have an option of skipping out of the gym for no reason it is just part of my daily routine. Weekends are for family and errands, period.

I have trouble with food, I like to eat, I like to eat a lot, and I like to eat good. When i'm in contest prep mode its a struggle but I make sure my diet is made up of things I like and I plan and prep. I"m in the off-season but I still can't go hog wild so I have to maintain a plan. I go off this plan occasionally, but I hop right back on it when I feeling to fluffy. I'm flexible. Be flexible.

Personally I wouldn't even use MFP calorie recs or eat back what they say you burned. I would just set one caloric goal and macronutrient goal and stick with that. If you worked out three days a week you could probably lose on 2500 calories. But don't just look at calories look at quality. What is making up those calories. If your diet consist of lean cuts of meats (steaks, chicken,pork, eggs, fishes, turkey bacon, etc), piles of fresh or frozen veggies(kale, broccolli), things like yams, grits, oats, white potatoes, brown rice, white rice, granola, etc) dairy like eggs and egg whites, skim milks or almond milks, greek yogurts, low fat cheese, low fat, low sugar condiments, olive oils and coconut oils, cooking sprays, and what not, you could probably eat large volume of food and reach 2500.

stay strict on the weekdays and have fun on the weekend or special occasions. Practice self control, you can definitely do it.