Embarrassed to get fit?

richUK

I started with just a diet, then I started doing exercise programs on video games consoles.. a bit of Wii Sports to begin with, then I moved onto the exercise software like EA Sports Active.. I now cycle to and from work every day (9-10 miles each way).

IMHO it's a question of taking baby steps at first, then moving it up.

I didn't tell anyone I was dieting to start with, then I told people I was eating healthily, then when they noticed a change I'd kick it up a notch. All good. I lost 6 stone in 11 months and have been on maintenance for three months.. still trying to find the right balance, but enjoying it now

Good Luck to you!

mikeschratz

I have always been afraid of failure... and when it came to weight loss, I always failed. But I had the mentality that I was doing this so I could look good, not be healthy. Until I got on this site, then the whole mentality changed. Now I am doing it to be healthy. And all those folks in my life today that are not healthy ask how I did it. My reply is, I am eating healthier and moving more. It ain't a diet, and it ain't something I am doing short term to get to a goal. I am in this for the long run and to stay healthy!

Add me if you want, I would like to be part of your support group!

daniel7121

You are your own worst enemy, you are so consumed in what others are thinking about you that you deprave yourself from enjoying life. Trust me a few years back I walked into the gym and I looked at the beasts working out and thought to myself soon enough I will be within their ranks, 3 years later I am proud to say I walk among them. It's time to make those dreams a reality buddy so go out and do it...

Thanks for your encouragement! I can see how I am my own worst enemy in terms of the mentality. I think part of the reason it resonates with me so much is because I had, in my opinion, a rough childhood at school. Always picked on (or picked last in some cases) for being too fat, overweight, etc. So for me, that mental barrier is a bit harder to get over. But I want to make this happen, for me! Thanks again!!

bevokolanek

"And God said "Let there be light..." haha. This is EXACTLY how things go for me in terms of the small town, everybody knows what I'm doing before I do it mentality.. Thanks for the advice "

lol. I know right??? I can't even leave my house without getting a call or text from my mother, asking where did you go? you car was not at home when I drove by!!! lol Gotta love Moms!!! :laugh:

RVfrog

You have had lots of great comments. I was afraid to go to the gym......so I found a rehab place up the road from me that offers a weight loss program and for $15.00 a wk I get a meeting one on one with a dietitian , blood pressure ck and a 1/2 hour class on nutrition and the use of the gym all for $15.00 a wk. That is a steal.....and to see the older people (who I am one of them...60 I am ) with their health issues and see them working to help heal from surgery and to hear them talk....makes me work harder. Good luck and you'll never know how many people you will inspire while you are getting healthy. Good luck..

IronSmasher

Success is the only option

janelgreo

Bro, don't EVER be embarrassed to make yourself better, healthier, fitter!

Take all that embarrassment, making fun of, hating, etc.. & use it as a POSITIVE! I can honestly tell you, that is THE BEST MOTIVATION! I strive off people who hate on me, who say "YOU CAN'T DO IT", who tell me "YOU'RE TOO FAT"!!

SHOW THEM THAT YOU CAN DO IT!! THAT YOU'RE BETTER & STRONGER THEN THEM!! THAT YOU CAN OVERCOME ALL THE OBSTACLES IN LIFE & MAKE YOURSELF A BETTER PERSON!!

P05T5CRIPT

When I started this lifestyle 6 months ago all I did was walk, but the walk I did was on a footpath on one of the main roads in our town, hundreds of cars passed me and I'm sure in those cars were people i knew. At first I was a little embarrassed to be seen waddling along, but after a while I was so concentrated on beating my previous time for the walk I forgot all about being embarrassed. Now I don't walk this route.....I run it!

The first time I stepped in the gym i joined i felt the size of a house (i wasn't far off lol), but people are so focused on their own training and workout they don't notice you. I don't care if I look a disgusting sweaty mess after a workout, it's my workout and it shows i pushed hard!

Concentrate on you and forget about the rest, just remember you're doing better and going faster than the people sitting behind the wheel of their car or those on their couch, so get out there and go for it! :drinker:

Poods71

I don't live in a small town but I know where you are coming from. What you've got to realise is that most people are probably thinking good on you but they don't want to say it in case they sound patronizing. Just keep at it and eventually it will become such a habit you won't even think about it and people will get so used to you doing it they won't think about it either.

Oh and good on you for getting out there and doing it :drinker:

fields_e

I do feel embarrassed to workout in public, and I know why; It stems from when I was in school, aged 15:
One PE class we were all shoved into the gym, shown how to use the different machines and told to switch every 15 minutes, but do whatever we wanted. I went on a step machine (which is meant to simulate walking up stairs) and some stick thin girls(I had and have no respect for these girls - they always made fun of anyone who wasn't like them) gathered around behind me and went, "Go on girl! Get your knees up!" They weren't being supportive, they were taking the p*ss, and to make it worse, they all went and hovered by a bicycle machine and made loud comments aimed at my size and how I'd be better off in a meadow.

After that I refused to use the step machine and went on to develop a liking for the rowing machine instead, where I got my chance to beat them in a little race (me and a friend started up a race. The girls thought they'd win). I enjoyed it so much, the teacher told me there was other machines in the gym, but I still refused to use the step machine.
Their comments (as well as other people's) have stuck with me so much so I refuse to even go swimming or attend water aerobics.

So to combat said embarrassment I do exercising at home. Anything from Wii Sports/Fit to Zumba & yoga. In the summer I'm hoping to get a bike and go out on Sundays down the 4 mile dirt track which goes through the meadows. Failing that I'm sure it's a lovely walk

With all the technology around including the Wii Fit and the XBox/Kinect (which I don't have -yet) you're a lot more able to hire out games from Lovefilm or getting games from online stores that allow you to workout in private.
Just by Zumba, Yoga and dog walking (and a healthy diet) I lost 5Kgs this summer (and put it back on since August due to laziness and other stuff going on - but I am now determined to get rid of this weight!), so don't let embarrassment keep you from losing weight, just find ways to work around it

bluebug53

My thought is who cares! You do it for your self, not for anyone else, have enough respect for your self to not worry what others say or do. They need to get their own life. Anyway once you start looking and feeling better, you may be an inspiration to others! And someone told me one time "If you think people are paying attention to you, you are wrong, everyone is to busy worrying about their own stuff or what other people may be or may not be thinking of them" So get out there and get fit, be an inspiration, feel great and live life to the fullest!!!!!

cassiegal724

I'm embarrassed also, not so much about people I know, but those I don't. I want to join a gym to start lifting, BUT I don't want to pay for it and I'm nervous about trying something new in front of people. For this reason I love working out at home. I never used to walk or jog around my neighborhood, but now that we have a dog, I don't feel embarrassed anymore cuuz I'm walking/running the dog and that feels more socially acceptable to me.

on the same token - I know this is stupid because whenever I see someone out walking or running I feel proud for them especially if they're overweight because they are taking care of themselves and I love to see that in between all the gluttony, self loathing, and poor health that's all around me every day!

Melaniec78

Let it be your motivation. I completely understand your feelings and when I felt like that I changed my thinking. Think about the end result and how they will all see that you did it!!!! Let it be your reason to keep going. When I quit smoking I told people so that I could be held accountable and shamed if I didn't follow thru.

calajane

I'm embarassed as well. it's something I do for myself, and I don't want others to comment on it.

yksdoris

I live in a big city but I can fully relate. when I first joined my gym I was really bad - I was verging on obesity, had no stamina at all, weak knees because of weak muscles and no confidence. That first walk in the gym door was so scary... I was *this* close to crying when the instructor asked me what my goals are... so instead of saying I wanted to lose weight I went "I just want to be more fit, with stamina and stuff". I then coasted for about a year and a half until I finally got serious with the whole shebang including calorie counting and weigthlifting.

There's a link that floats about on MFP that you really should read (just replace "girl" with "boy" and keep reading): http://flintland.blogspot.com/2012/05/hey-fat-girl.html

Now that I've lost over 30 lb, I'm not only less shy about being there but also feeling more comfortable with communication with the gym staff, the other people doing their thing... Sometimes I can even give tips (such as "there's a movement sensor behind that door that's now blocked - close the door and jump up and down, then the lights will come on"). Once one of the guys who's been there at least as long as I have; he actually said to me that I'm an inspiration: he sees lots of people come, be there for a month or two and then disappear again. That was the nicest compliment!

dancerom

and another thought about it: I feel that "the others" often feel guilty and embarrassed by people actually DOING the change and start to live healthy/care for themselves/exercise. Because you prove them that you can do it. And then they should be able to do it too... and there excuses melt away.
It's their subconscious embarrassment you feel and think it's yours. But actually it's theirs. So let it be theirs and go for your goals.

It's hard I know. And a lot of the ideas before can help you with it. It's your life!

divacat80

Not sure if I'm the only one with this problem so I thought I'd ask.. Long story short, I am sort of embarrassed for people to see me attempting to get fit. I live in a small town of 2,000 people, so everybody knows everybody. And everybody knows everybody's business. And for some reason, when I am out in public for a walk or a jog, I pray and hope that nobody I know will see me. Why? I'm not exactly sure. Anybody with similar feelings?

not exactly. i don't care about neighbours or people that see me everyday seeing me working out. But there are some people I don't get along with and who are always wanting me to fail in whatever I do, so that they feel better about themselves.
They are not fit nor they look fab or anything. They could use some exercise themselves. But they love pointing out how unfit I have always been and I bet they're talking behind my back about how I still have my muffin top and huge hips and how I'm losing my boobs and what a waste of time my efforts are being.

THAT's the kind of people I don't like seeing me strive for getting fit. I try to look happy while I workout so that they don't think I'm weak at this and prone to failure. Why? because that wouldn't be the truth! exercising and dieting is hard but I'm actually enjoying it. So when they ask "so... again going to the gym huh?" I always reply with a cheerful "YEAH!!!" as if I was going dancing on a saturday night or something :P
When they see me eating healthy and say "again with the boring salads huh?" I'm like "what do you mean?! this is DELICIOUS!". I know they think I'm crazy because they do know how much I love junk food but I try to make it look like my greenies are my fave food on Earth XD

What's worse... those are actually family members (in laws, but supposed to be family)

As for neighbours and people at the gym, they have always been supportive (though I'm sure they think I got a gastric band or something). At the gym I see all sorts of people (yes, choosing the right gym is important, you don't want it to be celebrity-posh gym) and they're all fighting hard against obesity, heart problems or against physical injuries. So we all share a feeling of pride for our accomplishments.

If you feel ashamed or embarrassed just think that you might feel that way until you get fit, once you get fit you won't feel like that anymore. And guess what? it won't be THAT long until you are in a healthy weight and good physical condition. You're probably facing more embarassment by being overweight and by others' stares than what you would have to face at the gym. People at the gym are too focused in their own exercise routines to notice anything beyond their dumbells.

heypurdy

Not sure if I'm the only one with this problem so I thought I'd ask.. Long story short, I am sort of embarrassed for people to see me attempting to get fit. I live in a small town of 2,000 people, so everybody knows everybody. And everybody knows everybody's business. And for some reason, when I am out in public for a walk or a jog, I pray and hope that nobody I know will see me. Why? I'm not exactly sure. Anybody with similar feelings?

I was the same way! I grew up in a very small town and I knew everyone. I was afraid to go for runs because I was just starting out and not very good. I didn't want people I knew to drive by and see me! I actually started using a personal trainer in another town about 15 minutes away so I didn't care who saw me. Now I don't live at home so I run outside all the time in my new neighborhood. Plus I'm better at it haha. But for you, it'll soon pass! If you don't want to run outside then join a gym a little farther from home! Once you're more confident in yourself you won't care who sees you. Good luck to you.

GluttonousGirl

If anything you might inspire someone else to start doing the same! Keep going!

ktsmom430

That's exactly how I feel, even after all the weight I have already lost. I live in the country. Everyone around us has at least 10 acres. I do my walks around the part of our yard that we mow, and hope no one drives by and sees me walking. I walk for an hour. Since daylight savings started I only walk on the weekends because it is dark when I leave in the morning for work, and dark when I get home. We have a gym at work so I work out on the eliptical in the morning before work, M-F, and before anyone else gets in in the morning, because I don't want them to see me. I am totally self consious about any criticism I may receive. But to be honest, I have only received positive comments from everyone. It is just me, being in my comfort zone.

LittleMiss_WillLoseIt

Do you exercise nakkid?

Otherwise, no.

^ this! && don't let anyone tell you anything. At least you are making the step in the right direction of living a healthy lifestyle.

briebear77

I live in a big city but I can fully relate. when I first joined my gym I was really bad - I was verging on obesity, had no stamina at all, weak knees because of weak muscles and no confidence. That first walk in the gym door was so scary... I was *this* close to crying when the instructor asked me what my goals are... so instead of saying I wanted to lose weight I went "I just want to be more fit, with stamina and stuff". I then coasted for about a year and a half until I finally got serious with the whole shebang including calorie counting and weigthlifting.

There's a link that floats about on MFP that you really should read (just replace "girl" with "boy" and keep reading): http://flintland.blogspot.com/2012/05/hey-fat-girl.html

Now that I've lost over 30 lb, I'm not only less shy about being there but also feeling more comfortable with communication with the gym staff, the other people doing their thing... Sometimes I can even give tips (such as "there's a movement sensor behind that door that's now blocked - close the door and jump up and down, then the lights will come on"). Once one of the guys who's been there at least as long as I have; he actually said to me that I'm an inspiration: he sees lots of people come, be there for a month or two and then disappear again. That was the nicest compliment!

I LOVE that link you put in here. I think everyone should read it! Thanks for sharing so I could read it again.

nascarted10

I used to live in a small town so I understand. But my main thought now is "screw them all". Makes life much easier and happier for me.

Adamanda5

I live on an Army post. I feel like I am surrounded by fit, healthy people, and because I am nowhere near that level of fitness, I also feel self-conscious. But I walk anyway! And for what it's worth, when I see someone heavier than I am walking/running/exercising, I do not think nasty, judgmental things; I am inspired! If someone who has farther to go than I do can put in the effort, then why can't I? If they are brave enough to do it, I can be. Keep working! You'll get there!

MSam1205

Everyone has given remarkable, supportive and ecouraging advice, I'd quote them all if there was space!! I don't know but a few folks in my neighborhood, and yet still felt uncomfortable walking for exercise. Having a dog changed all that in two ways. One because he's young and needs the exercise, and two I walk with him and most people probably think I'm doing it for him :laugh: little do they know it's more for me! He's happy when we do extra blocks cuz there's a lot more tree's to smell and mark:happy:

deksgrl

Stick with it, walk, jog, lose weight, get fit and just maybe you'll inspire some of those other 1,999 people in your town to do the same.

This. Be seen, be proud. Let it motivate you to succeed and let it motivate them to get off their butt.

ashleyfs200

The only people that will talk about it are the people that know they should be out doing it too! Never worry about what other people are thinking or saying about you - if they have nothing better to talk about then be proud that you're so important! Good luck!!

jayche

I kind of had a different problem: When I first started going to the gym I was concerned about how other people might see me as "too weak" or "too skinny" and laugh. Then I realized that the only person who really noticed me in the gym was myself and that everyone was too busy looking at themselves, the ridiculously huge guys deadlifting 600+ pounds for reps or the hot chicks doing squats or on the elliptical.

The people I hung around with who started noticing my body changing as a result of working out didn't ridicule me but were inspired and started to go to the gym themselves once they could see that I could do it.

SarahAFerguson

Here's the thing, some people will judge you, they would be doing that anyway because they are insecure in themselves and need to focus on the flaws of others. Some people will be critical, either because they are also insecure or because they care about you and have mistaken ideas about health and fitness. Some people will admire you and will be inspired to follow your example. All of these people can provide you with motivation to keep going. If you decide you don't want to be the local poster child for health and fitness then you can close your drapes and do a workout video at home.

embracingmycurves

Just remember your doing this for you. You can do anything you put your mind to!