has anyone out there chosen the new guy?

2

Replies

  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    I did....

    1.jpg

    That movie was terrible.

    OP: I panic when I have more then one romantic prospect at a time. I'm terrible about SHINY SHINY! So I deliberately stick with the guy I'm with and ignore the 'new guy'. It's how I try to fight the part of me that just likes shiny things.
  • Iron_Duchess
    Iron_Duchess Posts: 429 Member
    I Did. Left my ex for my who is now my husband. I just wanted someone with the potential to be a good husband, father, and provider. It was the best decision I made in my life. My ex was always in trouble, could not hold a job, and had to go into the military to do something with his life. I dated my husband for 6.5 yrs. until he graduated, he is now an engineer, and a good father and provider. I know it was a calculated decision at the beginning, but I love him, and it's all good. :smile:
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    lol this is confusing even me I have replied to so many...theres nothing wrong with my current. Hes great. we share an apartment. I just feel a little weird because I met someone and hes great too. I like to spend time with him and its starting to make me feel guilty. I simply wanted to know if anyone else has ever been in a situation where they met someone new and decided to take a chance. Thats all.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    so let me get this straight...judging from the lack of details in your post...there's nothing WRONG with the old guy...you just want a newer model?

    .....i'd do that to my microwave....ooops...i mean deathbox...

    but not a guy...

    ha i guess it was vague. nothing wrong with the old guy. But someone else came along who is equally wonderful. Chosing between the "models" and going with the newer one is what I was curious about.

    Nope.
    Most adults don't play games..
  • I left my first boyfriend for my second boyfriend and my second boyfriend for my third boyfriend and still waiting for someone to leave my third boyfriend for.

    Kidding, I have been with the 3rd one for almost 8 years and we are lifers.

    Lifers, huh. Damn, cause you look JUST LIKE my 3rd wife.....
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    lol this is confusing even me I have replied to so many...theres nothing wrong with my current. Hes great. we share an apartment. I just feel a little weird because I met someone and hes great too. I like to spend time with him and its starting to make me feel guilty. I simply wanted to know if anyone else has ever been in a situation where they met someone new and decided to take a chance. Thats all.

    I feel bad for the current guy.
    Seems as though he may get blindsided by this..
  • GBOGH_5
    GBOGH_5 Posts: 174 Member
    Story of my life...
  • perfectingpatti
    perfectingpatti Posts: 1,037 Member
    lol this is confusing even me I have replied to so many...theres nothing wrong with my current. Hes great. we share an apartment. I just feel a little weird because I met someone and hes great too. I like to spend time with him and its starting to make me feel guilty. I simply wanted to know if anyone else has ever been in a situation where they met someone new and decided to take a chance. Thats all.

    Gotcha. I've known several people who have done this. For some, it turned out fine. For a couple of others, they lost their first guy for good over it and it turned out that new guy wasn't so great. Is the new guy worth losing the current guy over?
  • shanmackie
    shanmackie Posts: 194 Member
    i basically always did it, but it doesn't give your heart a chance to heal. i wouldn't recommend it.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    Leave the first guy so he can get on with his life while you pander after the next nice guy to wander along.
  • I met my husband when I moved back home and started my new job. He worked there.. My boyfriend at the time hadn't moved up here yet, and as soon as I met my husband, I knew there was something there. I broke up with my boyfriend at the time before he even asked me out because I knew there was something special there... 5 years, two kids and a wedding later, I still have my best friend... best decision ever!!! :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    Leave the first guy so he can get on with his life while you pander after the next nice guy to wander along.

    Yea, this.
  • TheSink
    TheSink Posts: 97 Member
    If I may so bold, if you have two "wonderful" men and are contemplating leaving your man for a new man simply because he is new, then, my dear, you do not deserve either of them.

    of course it is not at all just because he is new. Next time i should explain myself better.

    Actually, next time you should not explain yourself at all.
  • alpine1994
    alpine1994 Posts: 1,915 Member
    Yes, it turned out to be a nightmare and now I'm back with the old guy and we are happier than pigs in s***.
  • ShreddedTweet
    ShreddedTweet Posts: 1,326 Member
    I ALWAYS had someone waiting in the wings when I was a teenager and in college but it's not a good idea to do that when you're old enough to know better! Taking time on your own is the best favour you could do yourself...
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    lol this is confusing even me I have replied to so many...theres nothing wrong with my current. Hes great. we share an apartment. I just feel a little weird because I met someone and hes great too. I like to spend time with him and its starting to make me feel guilty. I simply wanted to know if anyone else has ever been in a situation where they met someone new and decided to take a chance. Thats all.

    Gotcha. I've known several people who have done this. For some, it turned out fine. For a couple of others, they lost their first guy for good over it and it turned out that new guy wasn't so great. Is the new guy worth losing the current guy over?

    no, I dont think so. I was just wondering, its a strange feeling. Its new for me and i thought maybe this was just something that other people may have experienced.
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    If I may so bold, if you have two "wonderful" men and are contemplating leaving your man for a new man simply because he is new, then, my dear, you do not deserve either of them.

    of course it is not at all just because he is new. Next time i should explain myself better.

    Actually, next time you should not explain yourself at all.

    I'm gonna go with this!
  • lavieboheme1229
    lavieboheme1229 Posts: 448 Member
    lol this is confusing even me I have replied to so many...theres nothing wrong with my current. Hes great. we share an apartment. I just feel a little weird because I met someone and hes great too. I like to spend time with him and its starting to make me feel guilty. I simply wanted to know if anyone else has ever been in a situation where they met someone new and decided to take a chance. Thats all.

    I'm not passing judgement, I'm just asking- but do you consider that a form of emotional cheating to some extent?

    My fiance is the best thing that ever happened to me. There was 1 instance where he had blown me off and I was pissed at him, so I went with my friends to Boston for the 4th of July. And they brought their guy friend who had his girlfriend blow him off for the holiday also. We were flirty, but never once did the idea cross my mind that he could be a "newer model".
  • Drunkadelic
    Drunkadelic Posts: 948 Member
    lol this is confusing even me I have replied to so many...theres nothing wrong with my current. Hes great. we share an apartment. I just feel a little weird because I met someone and hes great too. I like to spend time with him and its starting to make me feel guilty. I simply wanted to know if anyone else has ever been in a situation where they met someone new and decided to take a chance. Thats all.
    yep currently doing it. But I was settling for my ex and I knew it. He was a nice guy but the connection was just never completely there. If you love your current man, he treats you well, you enjoy his company and the sex is satisfying, I would really think long and hard before you make any rash decision. *snickers* I said long and hard...
  • Odiliawine
    Odiliawine Posts: 116 Member
    Honestly, it almost sounds like you're bored of the current guy and looking for a reason to go with the new one. Yes, I have done this and yes, it ended in disaster. Do I regret it? No because I am fully aware that if I really loved guy #1 I wouldn't have had a wandering eye in the first place.

    You really only need to ask yourself one thing, do you look at your current guy and say, "Yeah... I can do better"?
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    oh my. I just said that because someone else did. i dont think of men in terms of new models.
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    Honestly, it almost sounds like you're bored of the current guy and looking for a reason to go with the new one. Yes, I have done this and yes, it ended in disaster. Do I regret it? No because I am fully aware that if I really loved guy #1 I wouldn't have had a wandering eye in the first place.

    You really only need to ask yourself one thing, do you look at your current guy and say, "Yeah... I can do better"?

    no not really. i am luck as hell to have him. hes great to me.
  • FabMrFox
    FabMrFox Posts: 259 Member
    If I may so bold, if you have two "wonderful" men and are contemplating leaving your man for a new man simply because he is new, then, my dear, you do not deserve either of them.

    ^^^^^this.
  • I was with my fiance all through college. Even though the relationship was largely over (for me), meeting someone new gave me the push I needed, and I moved out and gave the ring back, which was very difficult since guy 1 was a great, awesome, nice guy who was crazy about me, I just didn't feel the same. But now I'm married to the new guy :) Even though I miss guy 1 sometimes, I am happy with my decision three years later. Ultimately, I had to realize that if I truly loved guy 1, which I did very much, I was being selfish and unfair by hanging onto him. I recommend the book called something like "Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay."
  • Odiliawine
    Odiliawine Posts: 116 Member
    Honestly, it almost sounds like you're bored of the current guy and looking for a reason to go with the new one. Yes, I have done this and yes, it ended in disaster. Do I regret it? No because I am fully aware that if I really loved guy #1 I wouldn't have had a wandering eye in the first place.

    You really only need to ask yourself one thing, do you look at your current guy and say, "Yeah... I can do better"?

    no not really. i am luck as hell to have him. hes great to me.

    So then, cut off ties with new guy and get better connected with your current hubby. Maybe you're just looking for something he isn't offering you.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    I am the new guy.
  • cmcollins001
    cmcollins001 Posts: 3,472 Member
    My ex-wife did it several times while we were married...if you want you can ask her. She finally settle on someone to marry and married him the very night out divorce was final. Then divorced him. She's was pretty good about going from one guy to another actually.
  • Why leave, why not just have both?

    well this i would consider cheating.


    so cheating is only physical and not emotional? Because I'm guessing you got to know guy #2 while with guy #1, right?
  • JezzD1
    JezzD1 Posts: 431
    i don't understand this question. are you asking if people have broken up with someone for the sole reason of dating someone else?
    I think she is talking about cheating on someone with someone else and then leaving that person for the one she cheated with???
    Nevermind I read the rest of the post lol anywho I would just say careful cuz the grass isn't always greener on the other side (it is green where you water it lmao) ---couldn't resist anyway. If you decide that was a mistake guy number one may not want you back after "moving on" so quickly...
  • katz22
    katz22 Posts: 116 Member
    Has anyone out there had an experience where they were with someone and left them for someone new? how did it happen and how did it work out for you?


    Did it a lot from age 15-20, because the relationships just faded fast. Current boyfriend I've had for 7 years :)
    Just remember the old saying "the grass is always greener" you don't want to get into a new relationship only to find yourself pining for the previous partner.