I'm so embarrassed

NureeniWright

You need to just make a few simple changes at a time. For example when I was 20kg heavier I was drinking 1-2 litres of full sugar coke a day. I forced myself to switch to Diet Coke until i liked the taste and then I worked on removing soft drinks from my daily diet. I now have 1 or 2 diet cokes a week and the rest of the time its water, tea or green tea only for me and I like it much better. Its not gonna be easy and you need to stop expecting yourself to be perfect. I find trying to do better today than I did yesterday helps, and even though I go though periods of giving up, I find that those periods get shorter and my motivation endures. Don't compare yourself to everyone else and get stressed out. Focus on yourself. If your boyfriend isn't willing to join you then forget the Idea that you have to eat what he eats. My boyfriend and I shop separately and cook our own meals, Its less romantic but we have different nutritional goals and it works better for us (Also no fighting over the grocery bill! yay!). We have a cheat day once a week and thats our time to eat a nice meal together, we just keep an eye on the portion size.

Find what works for you, don't be stressed if what works for someone else just doesn't work for you. I'm naturally a disorganised person and I like having variety in my foods, so I don't tend to eat exactly the some things every day. I buy healthy foods that I like and can be kept and I decide what to eat on the day. For example I make a freeze bulk amount of Bolognese sauce filled with veggies, then i can defrost it and eat it in many different ways (on pasta, to top of steamed veggies, with a baked sweet potato and 0% fat greek yogurt, add a can of kidney beans for a quick chilli) and sometimes I will still eat out during the week but I make sure to choose a option I know is fairly healthy such as sushi or a burrito salad etc. Try a healthy option when you eat out so you can have a decent amount of food for the calories instead of starving yourself and trying to limit yourself to one chicken strip for dinner (no one has that kind of willpower when their starving and you're just setting yourself up for failure and a guilt trip) Most fast food places have nutrition info online and in store so if you learn to read the nutritional information its really quick and easy to make a better choice.

As for the exercise you need to evaluate if you are at the point where a gym membership is useful to you. Diet is really what counts for weight loss. Either way just try to get out and move a bit more, you don't have to run for an hour, just try to swing by on your way home from work and walk or bike for 20 minutes or go and walk around the block a couple of times. Just do as much as you feel like you can everyday and remember that guilt isn't a good motivator, the feeling of accomplishment and pride when you did a little bit more than you did the day before is what will keep you going in the long run.

Sorry for the super long response but I know where you're coming from and its difficult because you know your acting irrationally and people telling you to just stop really don't help. Try to think more positively about yourself and your accomplishments rather than getting depressed at how far you feel that you have to go.

all4my3boyz

The thing is, I can't want you to lose weight and I can't make your choices for you. It comes down to YOU and you have to decide why you want to do it. Then you have to just get off your *kitten* and do it.

I don't allow myself to "have" to make bad food choices. I pre-plan my meals and I bring all my food with me when I leave for work in the morning. I cook all our dinners. And I plan trips to the gym or plan exercise routines at home and I just don't skip them. I do all this because there is a certain way I want to look and a way I want to feel, and I know that these choices I'm making are helping me to achieve that.

It doesn't mean you can't ever eat at Denny's again. But you aren't going to get what you want by consistently making the wrong choices, especially when you KNOW they are wrong. No one here can fix that for you.

Worth repeating... YOU have to want it and do it for YOU!!

fearless_

Thanks for the advice again...

Today I went to the gym,
and spent 5 dollars...
On a greek salad, and an unsweetened green tea.

I still managed to lose 1.7 pounds this week, which is crazy.

I've decided that I'll only allow myself to spent $5 a day on food,
and make healthier choices.

I talked to my boyfriend,
and tonight he is making steamed vegetables and spaghetti squash for dinner.
&& He said on days we don't hike or go to the gym, we'll at least go for a walk.

I will continue to make baby steps towards a healthy lifestyle..
I do think I turn to food for comfort, because that's how I grew up
but I'm making an effort one day at a time to fix that.

Thanks for the help and support.

swfloridagal

tons of sites to help get finances in order? Hummmmmm..... which ones do you reccommend?

swfloridagal

What is a bootcamp owner?

Excellent suggestions. That pretty much sums up my days worth of food.

celb500

I have mantras to stop me from spending my money on baguettes and pastries.

So for example yesterday I would have killed for a baguette on my way home from work but i repeated motivational quotes and made myself day dream about fitting into that killer outfit i bought next weekend and making my bfs ex so crazy. Stuff like that is what makes me steer clear and it is what keeps me motivated when i go out for a run in the cold. (i have lost 22lbs in 3 months just through cal counting and going out for a run 3 times a week! no money on a gym spent, theres lots of exercise you can do for free!) I used to be EXACTLY like you, my student loan and all my time went on food but you can train your brain out of doing it and reward yourself with clothes in smaller sizes, not big dinners.

YOU CAN DO IT GIRL!

BellaBumbles

I ALWAYS had a hectic work schedule and would stop in-between jobs to get fast food. I realized I was spending 15$ a MEAL and I hardly ever really enjoyed it. I would get upset that it wasn't made just the way I liked it or blahblahblah, then one day I was like 'As IF, Laura! You want good food? Spend that 15$ on healthy groceries and MAKE good food.' Its difficult to eat healthy on a budget, but I never had any problem spending cash on CRAP, so I shouldn't have a problem doing this either. Not one bit of fast food in weeks, and 17 lbs down!

msshiraz

Thanks for the advice again...

Today I went to the gym,
and spent 5 dollars...
On a greek salad, and an unsweetened green tea.

I still managed to lose 1.7 pounds this week, which is crazy.

I've decided that I'll only allow myself to spent $5 a day on food,
and make healthier choices.

I talked to my boyfriend,
and tonight he is making steamed vegetables and spaghetti squash for dinner.
&& He said on days we don't hike or go to the gym, we'll at least go for a walk.

I will continue to make baby steps towards a healthy lifestyle..
I do think I turn to food for comfort, because that's how I grew up
but I'm making an effort one day at a time to fix that.

Thanks for the help and support.

You can do this!! And it feels better sounds like you have some strong support at home too! We will always be here to help you- and congrats and the start of your weight loss/fitness journey!

korsicash

This is going to sound harsh but from your post it sounds like "talk". You are not ready to go down the road to being healthier. You are sabotaging you for some reason and you need to come up with that reason. You know your food choices and spending choices are poor yet instead of stopping you do it any way. When you get real on wanting to change you will. With that said you will have days, weeks, months where you may back slide because we are all human and it happens. Get real, make your self for 21 days do what is right. Mark it off on the calendar. On day 22 it will feel like a habit and you will feel great! Now I am going to take my own advice and figure out why I won't stick to my goals lately....GOOD LUCK!

MissKitty9

You know, I can definitely relate to the boyfriend aspect of this post...my bf & I are always *talking about* eating healthier, but then splurging on heavy dinners & lots of wine. It's like we egg each other on. Because, honestly, it's fun to pig out & be lazy together sometimes. So don't be embarrassed. Plus, the more embarrassed/guilty you feel, the more likely you'll be to root yourself deeper in the habit.

Let it go, & make small changes at a time. You can do it

jr1985

Hey There! Feel free to friend me if you like.

I totally understand where you are coming from. I spend WAY too much money on eating out and fast food. Why? not because I'm necessarily in love with the food... but because it's fast, and I already feel like I have no time.

Best way for me anyways to stay away from it... Just suck it up and force myself not to... I know it sounds harsh... but especially just for now until after the new years? That is only 2 weeks... you can TOTALLY do that... That's how i always have to look at it... I may not be able to be crazy good forever, but I can be crazy good for a month before I go on a trip, eat what I want to when I'm gone, and then set new healthier goals when I get back.

Sounds like time is a huge issue for you too... Maybe ease into your no-eating out by making things you can make quick and easy... like sandwhiches or salads... Crock pots are working girls' best friends! Especially in the winter... yummy soup all ready for you when you get home from work.

LillysGranny

I find it really helpful to write things down......my suggestion would be to make a pros and cons list about why you would want to cook at home and make healthier choices vs. eating out all the time. Mind you, there will be good and bad things about each choice, but when you add it all up maybe it will make you realize that taking care of yourself is really a high priority. Maybe you and your bf could start cooking together!

bgelliott

TL;DR: I spent all of my money on food that makes me fat and sick. Help.

I would LOVE to eat healthy foods all the time
but "I can't afford it?"
I've been complaining about not being able to afford Christmas presents,
not being able to move closer to the beach,
not being able to fix my car...
and...being fat, and sluggish, and having panic attacks, blahblahblah

But yesterday, before work I could afford to get a coffee for me and my boyfriend...
$10, lots of sugar, caffeine and calories... (gee, why am I having panic attacks, why is it sooo hard to stay under calories?)

Alright, one thing...
NOPE I have to work, and There's just "nothing my bf and I can do besides eat..."
$21, nasty old pasta, grossest tri tip sandwich I ever had... but I "had to eat it"

I "didn't have time to exercise before work" ...even though I pay $100 for the gym (I know, right?) I live 10 minutes from the beach, 10-20 from 5 beautiful hikes, etc.

So, I get off of work, still magically under cals, but feel like TOTAL crap...
My boyfriend and I were literally talking about eating healthy, when he says "I want chicken strips"
We pull up to Dennys, I think I'll have 1 strip, and maybe a diet coke...
not chicken strips, 3 vanilla cokes, and mozzerella sticks.
$23

I spent 55ish dollars, in one day... on CRAP.
I had a terrible stomach ache, I was moodswingy and gittery alllll day.
I don't buy new work clothes because a) I "can't afford them" and b) I feel so uncomfortable in clothes, it's unreal.

My boyfriend said if I can go from today to January 1st without eating out, he'll take me to a steak dinner...
That sounds AWESOME but I don't know if I should reward myself with food.

I was wondering... How did you overcome this "problem?"
Any similar stories?
Any advice?
Any ranting?
Anyone want to be my friend? Hold me accountable?
Anyone else get gittery and panicy after certain foods?
Any advice on healthy eating on a budget?

I know, you probably see these stories all the time, and shake your head...
but maybe, me...seeing how ridiculous I am being...and being held accountable will help me in my journey.

My reward was a bunch of new clothes, not food!

c_tap77

Eating well and financing your healthy choices can be really difficult. I work in finance for a living and I still find it really challenging sometimes. And what's worse, when we worry about our finances we generally look for some way to forget about our money troubles and find comfort (which explains why we eat the things we know we shouldn't)!

As far as financing the healthy choices, here are some of the things I do to cut down costs:

1) Coupons! Seriously they are awesome...and by spending maybe and hour or so a week clipping them from the paper and searching online, I cut down my grocery bill anywhere from $50-$100 per trip to the store (sometimes even more)! Along with this keep an eye on the store ads and if you aren't terribly brand loyal you can get things like toothpaste, toilet paper, paper towels, and tons of other stuff for free...yes I said FREE!!!! This will free up some extra money to buy some healthy things.

2) Like several other people said, shop the outer rim of the grocery store. Also, don't always buy pre-packaged fruits and veggies (a lot of times they're more expensive than the ones you weigh and bag yourself). And DON'T go to the store hungry! If you walk into the supermarket with an empty stomach, you'll be more tempted by the Twinkies and fried frozen foods and things that aren't very nutritional.

3) Use a budgeting website. Your bank may even have the tools for you to do this online from their site, but there are so many options and Apps to help manage finances. You can set up 2 separate budgets for food: groceries and eating out.
Another way to go (I used this method with my fiance when teaching him how to budget) is to set a budget and withdraw cash from your account and divide it into envelopes for each portion of your budget. When you run out of money in a particular envelope, that's it! And if you have money left over at the end of the pay period / month (however you want to structure it) you can put it into an "extras" envelope to spend on a treat for yourself!

4) Prep ahead of time! I'm so busy that when I wasn't doing this I was so much more tempted to stop and pick up a burger or other unhealthy foods on the go instead of making good choices. Now I set aside a couple hours during the week (usually Sunday afternoon) and just prep food for the week. I bought a bunch of plastic food storage containers and I bake chicken, steam veggies, and portion out my lunches and snacks for the entire week! That way, in the morning I can just grab what I need out of the fridge and be on my way without having to wake up earlier or put any thought into it. I just choose a movie on Netflix on my Kindle and get my girly chick-flick on while I make meals for the week! Plus, when I have a sudden snack attack there's a pre-portioned healthy option ready to go so I'm not tempted to reach for the Cheetos.

5) Don't totally deprive yourself from eating out. Everybody has that one restaurant that they love and would feel amiss if they never ate there (or rarely ate there) again. Mine happens to be Chipotle---seriously I could eat the stuff every single day and never get sick of it. So instead of saying I will never eat Chipotle, I plan my trips there so a) I have a little treat to reward myself for a couple weeks of hard work sticking to a diet and b) I can somewhat healthier choices when I go an not feel guilty over eating something I love! And if you do happen to make that sudden pit stop and Denny's or McDonalds or (insert your favorite fast food place here) don't let that be an excuse to eat poorly the rest of the day. We all do it: "Well I had the bacon, egg, and cheese bagel for breakfast so I guess it doesn't matter if I get fast food tacos for lunch, and since I've already messed up that bad, there's no harm in having the 7 layer chocolate cake for dessert after dinner!" And then the next morning you wake up and feel crappy about yourself and do it all over again. There's nothing wrong with rewarding yourself with a little treat...but make sure you PLAN it! Plus, if you plan, you can usually find coupons to save you even more money when you go out (see it all ties together).

7) You might want to look around at other gyms to see what options are out there that might help bring the cost down. Before you set out, make a list of the things you like about your current gym and would need to feel successful while training. You can also consider looking for workouts online or buying videos (you can find workout videos for dirt cheap at a lot of stores--even at $10 a piece, you could buy 10 for the price of 1 month at your gym and have a lot of variety)!

Okay so I know I just threw a lot of info out there at you, but all of this works...seriously. Two years ago when I graduated from college, I barely made more than minimum wage and had about $3,000 in credit card debt plus HELLO REAL WORLD finances to take care of.

Using the budgeting tools I mentioned, I not only paid off my credit card, I put a substantial amount of money into savings and I'm paying for a good portion of my wedding. Granted now I make much more than I did two years ago, but I promise it can be done when you barely have pennies to rub together.

Good luck! I hope some of this essay I just wrote helps you reach your goals.

opalescence

You just have to do it. I mean - people ask here all the time how to find "motivation" and how to make the right choices.

The thing is, I can't want you to lose weight and I can't make your choices for you. It comes down to YOU and you have to decide why you want to do it. Then you have to just get off your *kitten* and do it.

I don't allow myself to "have" to make bad food choices. I pre-plan my meals and I bring all my food with me when I leave for work in the morning. I cook all our dinners. And I plan trips to the gym or plan exercise routines at home and I just don't skip them. I do all this because there is a certain way I want to look and a way I want to feel, and I know that these choices I'm making are helping me to achieve that.

It doesn't mean you can't ever eat at Denny's again. But you aren't going to get what you want by consistently making the wrong choices, especially when you KNOW they are wrong. No one here can fix that for you.

^ THIS - all day long this, this and this!

Camilletanis

I understand your frustration.

Eating healthy is expensive, and eating out is more convenient. Unfortunately.

What really helped me in the beginning was cooking more at home. I didn't necessarily start out cooking healthy foods, because the decision to cook more was so that my husband and I could save $$. We both work full-time and have three kids, so buying food everyday was convenient for us. After about a month of doing that, I signed up for a 10-week Weight Loss Challenge at my job. I initially signed up becuase I needed the motivation to start eating healthy and exercising after being inactive for over one year. About half-way through the Challenge, a co-worker suggested that I use the MyFitnessPal app. Using it really helped me to see where I was packing on the most calories, so I gradually began to change what I ate, instead of eating less. For example, I used to eat two bananas everyday as part of my mid-day snack or breakfast. When I saw how much sugar and calories they had in them, I swapped them out for boiled egg whites and one large Golden Delicious apple, which burns more calories in digestion than consumption. (BTW, it may help to look up Negative Calorie Foods) I drank lots of water, and had smaller portions throughout the day, instead of three large meals. It definitley took a while for my body to adjust, but it paid off. I went from 163lbs. to 150lbs.. Not only did I win the Challenge at work, but now my husband is starting to eat healthier on his own.

sramirez952

I know exactly how you felt when it came to money on healthier foods. But it's AMAZING how much money you really do save by buying and making the food yourself instead of going to fast food. For example if you spent $23 on just Denny's for you and boyfriend, just think if you were to go to the supermarket how many things you can buy with that same amount. EXAMPLE: skinless boneless chicken tenders roughly 5-6$ per package about 7 pieces, one pound of green beans or veggie of your choice roughly 2-3$, brown rice or baked potato roughly $3, pricing may very since I live in Texas. Basically you spent $12-15 dollars depending how much you buy. Add a little bread crumbs or seasoning on your chicken, bake instead of fry, roast or steam your veggies,eat a half baked potato w/ light butter or sour cream, and there you go!!! Also whats great you might even have left overs!! What I learned about eating on the go its not about money, but having PATIENCE to make your own food. I rather have went to McDonalds and got a burger only because I did not have the patience to go home and make myself a burger. You will have more control on what is in your food and your spending. Hope this helps!! Good Luck!

c_tap77

tons of sites to help get finances in order? Hummmmmm..... which ones do you reccommend?

Mint.com is fantastic! Can't say enough good things about it! And there's an app so you can track everything on the go.

It allows you to link all of your assets and debt so you can see it all without looking at 20 different websites (on mine I have my bank accounts, credit card, store cards, student loans, 401(k), seriously the sky's the limit with what you can add to this thing).

Not only can you establish budgets, you can set up goals like "pay off credit card debt" or "establish and emergency fund" or "save for retirement" and it helps you plan how much you need to put toward those goals per month to reach them within a certain time period.

kaseysospacey

I used to be like that. I preplan and just try to avoid temptation. I straight up told my SO that I needed to limit X foods and not to mention them or to ask me to get takeout with him, because "in the moment" I'll end up eating so much crap.

1shauna1

Don't reward with food! Find something else! Have your BF take you for a couple's massage or pedicures. Find another way to reward. As for the bad eating day, I think most of us have been there at some point. All you can do is move on from here. Good advice previously!

thrld

You need to set up habits. Because living your life in the re-active way is not working for you. And when you are eating out, you are paying for the convenience -- rather than the value of the food. It is always cheaper to eat healthier.

Start small. Plan your breakfast. -- and hold to it.

Plan a healthy snack (apple, grapes, raisins, nuts ) and measure out 1 portion into a baggie and bring it with you to work.

Plan your lunch. If it is too overwhelming to plan out a week in advance -- then don't. Just make the same thing everyday. Is it boring? yes. But once you get into the routine, you can change it up.

Make a few (1-2) rules that you DO NOT BREAK -- like 'no fried food', 'must eat veggies first' or 'no bread'.

If you are getting food out -- get the smallest size possible. Yes, you can ask for a 'small' at Starbucks -- they have them, even if they are not on the board.

cebreisch

First you have to want to do it. If you go into it begrudgingly, you won't be successful. Knowing what you have to do is a good part of solving the problems, but actually DOING IT is something different - and if you try to conquer the beast all at the same time, you're probably going to fail.

Take small steps. Eliminate the coffee's first. Then, if you're eating out every day for dinner, try cutting it down a couple of days. What can you do today, or what are you willing to do today, that will help you get you where you want to be?
What can you do that will set you up to be successful? Can I get rid of all the crap (chips, dips, sugary cakes/snacks) in my house and replace them with stuff that is healthier for me (light string cheese, yogurt, fruit) that I'm willing to eat? Are you willing to replace one soda or one coffee a day with water?

Once you get a handle on one thing, then just add to it. I used to drive through either McDonald's, Hardee's or Steak 'n Shake EVERY workday. I have probably only done that about 5 times in the last 18 months. Now I usually have yogurt, or fruit, or a protein bar or some combination thereof. Then I lessened my intake of soda's to 1/day at lunch. Then I got a small dorm fridge in my office that has bottled water, string cheese, yogurt, sometimes a salad or pineapple or grape tomatoes....snacks that I'm willing to have instead of worser stuff....and I did it this way so I wouldn't have to go into the kitchen at work and see any of the bad stuff in there.

Further, if you stick to lean, healthy proteins, the fat/carbs will take care of themselves. The better the quality of food intake, the better the weight loss journey will go.

Good luck!!!