Teenagers..... give me strength

savvystephy

Yes I have an 18 year old teenage girl who KNOWS everything. Dad knows nothing. Does doesn't know that 3500 excess calories eaten will equal a pound gained. Dad doesn't know that eating 2300 calories at 10:20 at night will NOT affect her weight. Dad doesn't know that it is healthier to only eat 4 cups of ice cream and 1 cup of peanut butter with apple slices is healthier than eating the original 8 cups of ice cream she was going to eat. Dad doesn't know that the eating habits she has now will absolutely guarantee she will get the freshman 20 in her first year of college. Dad doesn't know that her individual unwillingness to work out will doom her with being overweight once she gets older. Dad knows nothing.

Oh I can't wait until August 3. I will gladly drive her to college then. Give me strength.

She'll get through it. I was kind of like that when I was a teenager. I HATED my Dad too. But, after going away to college I learned the importance of family relationships and respect and love both my parents. I just have learned that I can't visit with my mother more than a certain amount of time and whatnot. She is going to have to learn about her eating habits on her own. No one but herself is going to make her change. :flowerforyou: She'll learn. You'll see how much she grows even over the course of a few months.

nhendri

OMG!!!!! All of these post are scaring the crud outa me. My daughter is 5 going on 6 and we are having huge behavior issue's now! I cant imagine her as a teenager!!!! AAAAHHHHHH Help lol:noway:

CasperO

For us 18 was easy, ours were pretty mature by then. the 13-14-15 years were like death but took longer. My daughter later told me "I remember being very angry with you, and feeling that my anger was justified - but I can't for the life of me remember just what I was angry about".

This too shall pass.

chefcc

Well it looks like Healthykt78 lives in a perfect world. We should all be so lucky.

CasperO

Which pedal is the break and which one is the gas and where does that darn key go again?:ohwell:

The brake is on the left, the gas is on the right. The key goes in the ignition which is generally to the right of the steering wheel.

Silly Brenda,,,

The clutch is on the left, the brake is in the middle and the gas is on the right. The stick is by your right hand (you're not british are you?) and the wheel is right in front of you. :laugh:

DeeDeeLHF

I am the mother of a 23 year old son and college grad who now lives at home because he can't find the perfect job, a 20 yr old son and college student, a 17 year old son and senior in HS and a very soon to be 13 year old daughter and I also have another daughter who is 10.

All I want to say is it is nice to not be alone!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

My kids are great but having rational discussions with them look just like this thread!:laugh: :laugh: :sad: :laugh:

mrsbeck

Casper and BrendaLee just keep making me love them! :laugh:

I've been biting my tongue hard enough to bleed while reading this thread. I'm just gonna chuckle now, and back away slowly.

God, I've never been so glad to be 34!

m2kjenn

For us 18 was easy, ours were pretty mature by then. the 13-14-15 years were like death but took longer. My daughter later told me "I remember being very angry with you, and feeling that my anger was justified - but I can't for the life of me remember just what I was angry about".

This too shall pass.

I've gotten quite a chuckle from this thread myself. Parenting teens is the most difficult job in the world, nothing can prepare you for it and you just have to figure it out as you go. I have two teenage daughters, 15 & 17, love them to death but there are days I want to lock them in the basement.

I have often said I cannot wait til the day they realize how terrible they have been at times, that first time they say "Mom, I realize now how right you were" that day I will finally feel redeemed. I know it will come, we all eventually come to that place. I also frequently ask my 17 year old when she is asking to do something crazy, consider what your answer will be when your daughter asks this someday - although she doesn't really see the significance of that now, my hope is that little seed will stay in the back of her mind and when she has that conversation someday with her daughter she will remember Mom.

lina1131

Teenagers! :grumble:







Just kidding :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

jmdolan

i have to say that i also got a chuckle from this thread. Im almost 25 now and I was always a decent kid growing up. But man did I have a B*&^hy Side. And i WAS always right. Like i said before, i was a good kid but it doesnt mean I still didnt have my battles with my parents. I made good decisions and sometimes I look back and there were times i WAS right. But there are many times I can look back and say my parents were right... or at least that I can see where they were coming from.

This thread has created such a stir. I think everyone judges and stereotypes to some degree. if not about the way teens act then about something else in the world. And there is probably SOME truth to alot of those stereotypes with the understanding that there will always be outliers. HOWEVER, i think if you ask most teens if there have been times when they disagree with their parents the majority will say yes. And if there are teens that never disagree with there parents then i think to some degree they need to take a bigger stand on what the believe to be right.

The adults in this thread werent stating that teens were dumb or idiots or really putting teens down in general. I dont even think any of them used the words dumb or idiot. They were simply generalizing the fact that teens and their parents dont always see eye to eye... And Im sure if you took a survery of both teens and parents you would find that on AVERAGE this is the case. Again, always recognizing that their are outliers.

MercuryBlue

I'm going to have teenagers in my house in ten years. I'm terrified at the prospect, lol.

Not all teenagers are raging lunatics- some are quite mature for their age! That being said, MANY of them are irrational know-it-alls. Unfortunately, nothing can be done. They really do have to learn the hard lessons for themselves...

(I was ALWAYS an irrational know-it-all growing up. You couldn't tell me anything. Even if I know you were right, I'd say, "I have to see it for myself!")

Some things never change.


Also...

"He who takes offense when none is intended is a fool, he who takes offense when offense is intended is a bigger fool. --Confucious "

sweetteacher123

Keep talking to your teen about healthy life choices. Make sure not to lecture, because that really turns them off. (I know, because my senior daughter tunes me out as soon as she feels I am "lecturing" her.) However, I do know that they do listen...eventually. They will figure out we're not as stupid as we once were. In the meantime, keep fighting the good fight!

HealthyKt78

i have to say that i also got a chuckle from this thread. Im almost 25 now and I was always a decent kid growing up. But man did I have a B*&^hy Side. And i WAS always right. Like i said before, i was a good kid but it doesnt mean I still didnt have my battles with my parents. I made good decisions and sometimes I look back and there were times i WAS right. But there are many times I can look back and say my parents were right... or at least that I can see where they were coming from.

This thread has created such a stir. I think everyone judges and stereotypes to some degree. if not about the way teens act then about something else in the world. And there is probably SOME truth to alot of those stereotypes with the understanding that there will always be outliers. HOWEVER, i think if you ask most teens if there have been times when they disagree with their parents the majority will say yes. And if there are teens that never disagree with there parents then i think to some degree they need to take a bigger stand on what the believe to be right.

The adults in this thread werent stating that teens were dumb or idiots or really putting teens down in general. I dont even think any of them used the words dumb or idiot. They were simply generalizing the fact that teens and their parents dont always see eye to eye... And Im sure if you took a survery of both teens and parents you would find that on AVERAGE this is the case. Again, always recognizing that their are outliers.

Thank you. Based on what you said I was a lot like you. It wasn't the OP that I had a problem with. I realize that a lot of teenagers fit the stereotype. What made me angry was the responses I got to my post. I respect that everyone feels differently about different people and everyone is entitled to their opinion. I understand that teenagers and their parents may not see eye to eye BUT no one agrees on everything. Two adults can have a differing opinion as well as two teenagers. Telling me I lack "the tools" to understand the point of view of an adult or that I only have my emotions to rely on and have no logical skills is what really angered me. I was simply pointing out that not everyone fits the stereotype. It was when I was attacked that I got defensive.

jojo52610

LOL what really cracks me up is every person who posted on this thread whatever their opionion or statement was, at one time were or are guess what .........a Teenager.............

BrendaLee

i have to say that i also got a chuckle from this thread. Im almost 25 now and I was always a decent kid growing up. But man did I have a B*&^hy Side. And i WAS always right. Like i said before, i was a good kid but it doesnt mean I still didnt have my battles with my parents. I made good decisions and sometimes I look back and there were times i WAS right. But there are many times I can look back and say my parents were right... or at least that I can see where they were coming from.

This thread has created such a stir. I think everyone judges and stereotypes to some degree. if not about the way teens act then about something else in the world. And there is probably SOME truth to alot of those stereotypes with the understanding that there will always be outliers. HOWEVER, i think if you ask most teens if there have been times when they disagree with their parents the majority will say yes. And if there are teens that never disagree with there parents then i think to some degree they need to take a bigger stand on what the believe to be right.

The adults in this thread werent stating that teens were dumb or idiots or really putting teens down in general. I dont even think any of them used the words dumb or idiot. They were simply generalizing the fact that teens and their parents dont always see eye to eye... And Im sure if you took a survery of both teens and parents you would find that on AVERAGE this is the case. Again, always recognizing that their are outliers.

Thank you. Based on what you said I was a lot like you. It wasn't the OP that I had a problem with. I realize that a lot of teenagers fit the stereotype. What made me angry was the responses I got to my post. I respect that everyone feels differently about different people and everyone is entitled to their opinion. I understand that teenagers and their parents may not see eye to eye BUT no one agrees on everything. Two adults can have a differing opinion as well as two teenagers. Telling me I lack "the tools" to understand the point of view of an adult or that I only have my emotions to rely on and have no logical skills is what really angered me. I was simply pointing out that not everyone fits the stereotype. It was when I was attacked that I got defensive.

Actually, you attacked the post first. Who are you to tell the OP that he needs to choose a better title for his posts when his original title wasn't a problem to begin with? I guess freedom of speech doesn't extend to the use of the word teenagers when expressing parental frustrations. You'be been going on about something so trivial now for 2 days.

Let me guess, "How dare you call my plight trivial!", right?

sheri3762

to whoever wants to listen to my opinion. Brenda was not out of line my calling someone "hun". It is used by many of us older adults when refering to younger people. Its just an endearment. NOthing more. If someone is offended by it, then I'm sorry. It definately was not meant to be offensive. I use it all the time and I really hope I haven't offended anyone because if I did, there are alot of them! As far as teenagers go, putting them into a catagory is just a way of generalizing. Of course we all know each teen is different. Some better than others. Some more mature and some who think they know everything! I had three that fell into the "lnowing everything" catagory! Of course, my boys were much easier to deal with than my daughter. Its all a learning process. the older get, the more you learn. today, I can happily state that anytime my kids (who are all in their twenties now) need advise or help making decisions. they come to me first. I've been put into the "old" catagory many times by my kids friends (when they were teens) and believe me, I'm definately not old yet!

to the initial post, I really did laugh when I read it! Not about your problems of course, but I laughed at the image it gave me when I thought about all the things my own teens did! Beleive me, it will get easier. We, as parents, all want whats best for our kids, but unfortunately, they have to learn by their own decisions. I've been there and watched them fall and could do nothing about it.

to the young lady who was offended. I'm sorry you were, but just try to understand that we are all a bunch of parents who really need to vent sometimes and our use of words may at times mean general things but by no means do they include everyone!

jrbowers83

At 26, I find myself right in the middle of this little debate. I'm out of the teenage years of feeling like I'm grown up and ready for anything and know it all, and yet I'm not so old that I can't identify with the teenage age group. I have a 6 year old who is already in the display of these same combative type arguments. Also, for the other parents out there do you notice how very similar a teenagers mood swings are to a toddler's temper tantrums? And it makes sense. A toddler is right on the brink of childhood, stuck with being too young to properly communicate his/her emotions and lacking the skills to be independent like they want to. But at the same time they are unsure of themselves and will come running to have cuddle and reassurance from mom/dad. A teenager is right on the brink of adulthood, lacking the life skills to "prove" themselves in the real world, wanting to take on all the adult responsibilities and be respected as an adult and feel that they're "grown-up". But deep down they do still want that comfort and assurance from mom/dad. The security of knowing that they will have someone to cheer them on when they succeed, or someone to fall back on when they do not.
My advice to the parents of teenagers, and it may seem counterintuitive, but try to turn the tables and instead of trying to force your teens to listen and understand you, start listening and understanding what they're doing, what interests them, and what bothers them. Usually this will result in them feeling more secure in your knowledge and a little more two-way communication. On the other hand you may just get another eye roll and "stay out of my business" but keep trying. They are testing boundaries just as a toddler is, so you can't give up easily.
I also just want to say that it is VERY obvious that the parents that have vented about the teens love them very much. My mother never cared so much to even argue back with me. Just yelled at me and walked away. So you're doing something right just to be there and care. Hope this helps :flowerforyou:

MercuryBlue

to whoever wants to listen to my opinion. Brenda was not out of line my calling someone "hun". It is used by many of us older adults when refering to younger people. Its just an endearment. NOthing more. If someone is offended by it, then I'm sorry. It definately was not meant to be offensive. I use it all the time and I really hope I haven't offended anyone because if I did, there are alot of them!

I was thinking the same thing. Also, the word 'hun' or 'hon' is often a regional thing. Has nothing to do with endearment and just how the people speak. But like I said before, "He who takes offense when none is intended is a fool, he who takes offense when offense is intended is a bigger fool. "

Also, there was no 'attacking'. I only saw one person getting defensive and hostile. Ah well..... sucks when people manage to spin a thread in the wrong direction, lol.

HealthyKt78

i have to say that i also got a chuckle from this thread. Im almost 25 now and I was always a decent kid growing up. But man did I have a B*&^hy Side. And i WAS always right. Like i said before, i was a good kid but it doesnt mean I still didnt have my battles with my parents. I made good decisions and sometimes I look back and there were times i WAS right. But there are many times I can look back and say my parents were right... or at least that I can see where they were coming from.

This thread has created such a stir. I think everyone judges and stereotypes to some degree. if not about the way teens act then about something else in the world. And there is probably SOME truth to alot of those stereotypes with the understanding that there will always be outliers. HOWEVER, i think if you ask most teens if there have been times when they disagree with their parents the majority will say yes. And if there are teens that never disagree with there parents then i think to some degree they need to take a bigger stand on what the believe to be right.

The adults in this thread werent stating that teens were dumb or idiots or really putting teens down in general. I dont even think any of them used the words dumb or idiot. They were simply generalizing the fact that teens and their parents dont always see eye to eye... And Im sure if you took a survery of both teens and parents you would find that on AVERAGE this is the case. Again, always recognizing that their are outliers.

Thank you. Based on what you said I was a lot like you. It wasn't the OP that I had a problem with. I realize that a lot of teenagers fit the stereotype. What made me angry was the responses I got to my post. I respect that everyone feels differently about different people and everyone is entitled to their opinion. I understand that teenagers and their parents may not see eye to eye BUT no one agrees on everything. Two adults can have a differing opinion as well as two teenagers. Telling me I lack "the tools" to understand the point of view of an adult or that I only have my emotions to rely on and have no logical skills is what really angered me. I was simply pointing out that not everyone fits the stereotype. It was when I was attacked that I got defensive.

Actually, you attacked the post first. Who are you to tell the OP that he needs to choose a better title for his posts when his original title wasn't a problem to begin with? I guess freedom of speech doesn't extend to the use of the word teenagers when expressing parental frustrations. You'be been going on about something so trivial now for 2 days.

Let me guess, "How dare you call my plight trivial!", right?

Yeah. Like I said, just because I'm a teenager who doesn't see eye to eye with an adult (you) doesn't mean I'm wrong. I will agree to disagree with you because no matter how valid my argument might be, I'm just a teenager with no logical skills. I didn't go on. I didn't respond to anything else you said. I stopped. I responded to one post that I thought was well thought out and supported both view points. And actually it's just been a day but I could be wrong in my counting since I lack a frontal lobe. This is the last thing I'll say to you Brenda so you can choose to respond or not. It seems pretty clear that you've made a good name for yourself on these boards. It's okay though, I know I have supporters out there. They've made a point to tell me privately. In the real world I am seen as a mature adult and when I make this argument with people who actually matter they understand my viewpoint and most agree. I honestly don't care what someone from an online forum feels about me. I find it hilarious actually. And I argue because I'm good at it and it's good practice for law school.

Iceprincessk25

UGHHHH!!! DEAD HORSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!