Something my boyfriend does that bothers me. Mini rant.

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  • andeey
    andeey Posts: 709 Member
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    Be responsible for yourself and focused on what you want to do. Just because you're a couple doesn't mean you melded into the one being. If he wants pizza, let him. If you want pizza, eat it IIFYM. But don't try to dictate what goes in his mouth or throw sarcastic comments around unless you want both of those in reverse.
  • ShreddedTweet
    ShreddedTweet Posts: 1,326 Member
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    Poor guy, it can't be easy having everything you do or say analysed for tone and meaning. He wants to eat pizza let him eat pizza and stop being so womany. It gives the rest of us a bad name!
  • jennyrebekka
    jennyrebekka Posts: 626 Member
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    My gf on occasion likes to try and stick her finger in my butt. Being a hetero male, I'm very not cool with this. However, I try to look at the bright side and am just glad she doesn't try to use her thumb.

    you, my friend, are awesome
  • ShreddedTweet
    ShreddedTweet Posts: 1,326 Member
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    I've been successfully married a loooong time, and I've utilized something that works wonders. It's called "The 3 C's": communicaiton, cooperation, and compromise.

    In a calm, kind, caring way, talk to him about your issue. Use "I feel..." statements instead of "You make me feel..." accusations. Ask for his cooperation in solving the issue, and compromise together on a solution that benefits both of you. You may have to give a little to get a little, but so will he. It may go something like this:

    "Dear, I'd like to discuss our diet journeys. I am working hard to lose weight, and I feel tempted when you eat pizza in front of me. I understand that your diet differs from m ine, and yours may allow you to have those calories, so I don't want to deprive you of what fits into your daily calories. But will you please cooperate with me on a solution so I am not tempted? I feel what might work is if you endulge in whatever you like, just not in my presence. Would that work for you? If not, then I am open to your ideas about how we can work through this together."

    Don't do this. And never describe this as your 'diet journey.'
  • iamkarent
    iamkarent Posts: 145 Member
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    yes, sorry, but I have to agree that if I said a snarky comment like that to someone I would be surprised if I didnt get sarcastic back...

    And as for the eating....I think the true step to a good future comes when you realize you are not on a diet....you are making lifestyle choices,,,and you just have to wait for your body to slowly catch up...it will happen with time...

    But in the meanwhile...have what you want...but have it with thought and in limited amount if not the best option..and planned in to a healthy day..

    Last night I sat here and had a great night with my kids...watched a christmas movie...made peanut butter cookies...and COMPLETELY enjoyed 3 warm cookies....and no guilt whatsoever....even had the hershey kisses on top :)

    This isn't a diet...

    And my boyfriend can eat whatever his heart desires...I want him to be healthy so that he is around a long time...but I have to make these choices for me...and I have to be able to do it with food around me...and people not making the same choices..

    It is actually empowering to make the good choices when you had other options..use it to motivate yourself...but he has to do it for himself.
  • LMT2012
    LMT2012 Posts: 697 Member
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    Boys can eat and drink more. We have to face facts : /
  • jfrankic
    jfrankic Posts: 747 Member
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    How much do you burn every week and how much do you consume?

    After you know that then maybe that pizza or extra helping of PB isnt so bad.
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12

    ^^ Listen to the man. He knows! Figure out your TDEE and then your calorie goal....if you haven't done it this way already. I eat 1/2 large pizza once a week, every week. It's my favorite food. I love every bit of it. It fits into my day, I plan it. And it hasn't hindered my progress. If anything, it has helped me because I'm not depriving myself of my favorite food. Nothing is off limits. :wink:
  • Rizabees
    Rizabees Posts: 80
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    You're the one who started with the joking about you not being able to eat any. : | I'm confused. If he wants to eat pizza, let him. Don't get all passive aggressive with your "jokes" and get all upset when he plays along, thinking it's all innocent fun.
  • 4kuykesh
    4kuykesh Posts: 26 Member
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    In the grand scheme of things, this is probably not that serious of an issue. Relationships are tough, life is tough - choose your battles...
  • daffodilsoup
    daffodilsoup Posts: 1,972 Member
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    This is your lifestyle choice, not his, and if you're responding with sarcastic comments, you don't really get to be offended when he does the same.
  • SweetestHoney
    SweetestHoney Posts: 95 Member
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    Give your boyfriend an opportunity to help you. Ask for his support and to help you stay motivated. So when he does go get the pizza or whatever you aren't as annoyed. Hope that made sense.
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
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    Communicate, communicate, communicate! Conflict avoidance only makes it worse.
  • CarlieeBear
    CarlieeBear Posts: 325 Member
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    My bf likes to serve me my food when he cooks. He'd load up a regular size plate with food and I'd eat more than I should so he wouln't feel bad. Then I'd enter it in MFP and groan. We tried having me fill my own plate, but I knew he liked serving me, so one night when I was using a smaller plate, I told him to try using that sized plate when serving me :)

    He's awesome!
  • katlac1
    katlac1 Posts: 12 Member
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    Sheesh! So much negativity!
  • fearless_
    fearless_ Posts: 75
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    :| My boyfriend is bbqing today..
    and he texted me saying "none for you, Gretchen Weiners"
    hilarious...but i love bbq. :P
    Just don't let his habits effect yours.
    It's hard but..sorry.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
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    My bf likes to serve me my food when he cooks. He'd load up a regular size plate with food and I'd eat more than I should so he wouln't feel bad. Then I'd enter it in MFP and groan. We tried having me fill my own plate, but I knew he liked serving me, so one night when I was using a smaller plate, I told him to try using that sized plate when serving me :)

    He's awesome!

    I've started doing this, too! It works! He is the cook and loves to bring me my food. I'm not sure why, I think it has something to do with presenting his hard work. (I don't cook, so I wouldn't know.) I've requested that he uses a smaller plate to serve me on and bam! Portion control, even if I'm not serving myself.
  • Louisianababy93
    Louisianababy93 Posts: 1,709 Member
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    you can too eat pizza!

    IF IT FITS YOUR MACRO'S .

    1)LEARN ABOUT IT.

    2)EAT ALL THE FOOD! (that your macro's allow)

    p.s i promise it works!
  • JanaCanada
    JanaCanada Posts: 917 Member
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    I've been successfully married a loooong time, and I've utilized something that works wonders. It's called "The 3 C's": communicaiton, cooperation, and compromise.

    In a calm, kind, caring way, talk to him about your issue. Use "I feel..." statements instead of "You make me feel..." accusations. Ask for his cooperation in solving the issue, and compromise together on a solution that benefits both of you. You may have to give a little to get a little, but so will he. It may go something like this:

    "Dear, I'd like to discuss our diet journeys. I am working hard to lose weight, and I feel tempted when you eat pizza in front of me. I understand that your diet differs from m ine, and yours may allow you to have those calories, so I don't want to deprive you of what fits into your daily calories. But will you please cooperate with me on a solution so I am not tempted? I feel what might work is if you endulge in whatever you like, just not in my presence. Would that work for you? If not, then I am open to your ideas about how we can work through this together."

    Don't do this. And never describe this as your 'diet journey.'
    Poor guy, it can't be easy having everything you do or say analysed for tone and meaning. He wants to eat pizza let him eat pizza and stop being so womany. It gives the rest of us a bad name!

    Well, aren't you a special kind of beyotch.
  • KarenJean91
    KarenJean91 Posts: 283 Member
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    I shouldn't have posted this, mainly because none of you know how my bf is.We joke around. He knew i was joking but knows i'm sensitive about this because i'm serious about it. I just know i wouldn't tease him like that if he were in my position. Most of the time I don't say a WORD when he says stuff like that. Even when I don't he makes rude remarks. And for you guys saying i shouldn't care what he eats, i don't. He acts like he is trying to lose weight and eat better but he doesn't. Have i said anything to him about it? No. I DO eat what i want, in moderation. I just didn't know the calories of a food court slice of Sbarro pizza, so i did not get it.
  • KarenJean91
    KarenJean91 Posts: 283 Member
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    Poor guy, it can't be easy having everything you do or say analysed for tone and meaning. He wants to eat pizza let him eat pizza and stop being so womany. It gives the rest of us a bad name!


    um... what?

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