A Miscarraige and Evil Doctor

rlshopp6

I am so sorry, that is heartbreaking. To be told what you were in such an insensitive manner, and the timing to hear that when you were dealing with the passing of your baby is that much worse.

Good for you that you are moving past the hurtfulness of what he said, and good luck with all the things you'll do this year to be healthy, for yourself, and for your family.

crudd123

I'm so sorry this happened to you. Get a new doctor right away! I always go with a female doctor! They are more understanding! Good luck to you!

DawnieB1977

OMG that is disgusting. I hope you wrote a letter of complaint. Advising someone to eat only 250 calories is ridiculous and dangerous - where did he do his medical training? Very sorry about your miscarriage too. Were you bleeding then?

Try to put what he said behind you and lose weight for you and your future children.

Emeraldmist20

You are such a strong woman! Dont' let anything, weight, or stupid doctor get in the way of your goals of holding your new baby.

neon7girl

I'd file a formal complaint with the state medical board. If nothing else..it will cause him some pain. Sorry to hear he was a jerk to you...unfortunately many are.

rml_16

OK, for health reasons, of course you should lose weight. And it is better to be a healthier weight in order to have a healthy pregnancy.

HOWEVER, since you were so early in your pregnancy, there is a very good chance the baby just wasn't viable and it had NOTHING to do with weight. It's extremely common to miscarry in those early days before even knowing you're pregnant. I read that something like 75% of pregnancies go that way. All you notice is that you have your period. It happens to fat women, skinny women and everyone in between.

Plenty of overweight women have healthy pregnancies and babies. The fact that the doctor told you to eat 250 calories a day and take a dangerous drug shows you how much what he says should mean to you.

I'm very sorry for your loss.

MB_Positif

My heart just broke for you. There is something severely wrong with that doctor. Beyond unprofessional. I am so sorry this happened to you.

Cindym82

Most doctor's don't have bed side manor, let alone know how to speak to a woman. Sorry you had to deal with that on top of the loss of a child. I wish you the best and you can do it!

Donica_Marie

Im so sorry that happened to you that doctor is an *kitten* and very unsensitive ... This year will be your year good luck!!

AlsDonkBoxSquat

I'm sorry that your doctor was such an *kitten*, especially at such a tender time. There was so much wrong with the way he treated you. He should have never been so callous about your loss, that's a terrible thing. He should have never recommended consuming only 250 calories per day, that's insane. I'm so sorry you went through that, and hopefully as you reclaim your life after that terrible experience and you shed the pounds (and the doctor) you will find your efforts to add to your family successful.

portergolf

Did he tell you to reduce your calories by 250 per day or eat 250 calories per day? Something doesn't seem to be adding up here. I have a hard time believing any doctor would recommend a 250 calorie diet.

Also, you stated you just started your diet and you told him you eat 1,500 calories a day. Did you happen to tell them you just started a new eating program? You don't get 100lbs overweight on a 1500 calorie diet. You either left a good bit of the story out or you weren't completely honest with your doctor and let him assume you have always eating 1,500 cals a day. BTW, if you are eating 1,500 cals a day you don't need a food suppressant.

I am sorry to hear about your miscarriage, I am a father of two little ones and they are special gifts. I hope you guys have success having another one.

Now, I think it’s time to start being honest with yourself and stop making excuses why you can or can't do things. Your profile is filled with excuses. It is so much easier to make excuses than to put in the work but excuses won't get you to where you want to be. We all have crazy schedules, work, commute, kids, chaos. Everyone in my house is up at 5:15am getting ready for the day, eat health breakfast, exercise, get ready (including a 1 and a 2 year old) and out the door (in no particular order).

You know those TV shows you like to watch at night? Well you need to decide would your rather watch those shows and sit on the couch or would you rather attack your goals and do some sort of exercise with that hour. Its about choices, good choices about diet and exercise will get you where you want to be not sulking about being overweight and how things for some reason aren't going your way.

You can do it, you just have to..... well, do it!

Sorry if this was harsh but sounds like you need a kick in the pants and sometimes people who are close to you won't tell you what you need to hear.


Edit - We are in bed by 10:00pm most nights. Sometimes 9:30 and never past 10:30pm. Rest is important and you can't get up at 5am if you are up until 12-1am.

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Yana150

I wish that I could give you a hug in real life - how traumatic that you had to deal with the miscarriage, and then his insensitivity on all at the same time. Even the way he dealt you the news was unprofessional and cruel. My heart goes out to you. I wish you good health and I hope and pray for your next pregnancy to be healthy and harmonious. Be well.

Bobby__Clerici

Wow, sorry you went through this....:flowerforyou:
I value a doctor who tells the truth, but please...BEDSIDE MANOR!
Fire him and shop around for a competent physician who has not let his head run off with his heart.

rml_16

I always go with a female doctor! They are more understanding! Good luck to you!

That is beyond false.

Rogiefreida

That doctor sounds like a royal p***k. I'm so sorry, miscarriages are heartbreaking. Use his harsh words to fuel change in your life. I hope this year brings you healing and strength.

marigiggles

Wow, my heart goes out to you. That was terrible and insensitive of that doctor to say those things to you. Talk about unhealthy as heck also. 250 calories in a whole day?? I think a person could die eating just that. You are beautiful and determined. You can do it. If you ever wanna talk I am here, I am a great listener.

Skinny_minny_mo

i am so sorry for your heartbreak and loss

that dr is a heartless jerk who deserves to be reported!

all the best with your goals hun
xx

atsteele

Just because "just about everyone has them" doesn't mean it's "no big deal". You lost a baby. It's a big deal.

Find a new ob/gyn. He's an *kitten*.

magairlin

I am sorry that you have suffered a miscarriage and I hope that you will soon have a healthy baby. I had a miscarriage once so I know how sad you must feel but don't blame yourself about it. The doctor was very insensitive to say to you what he did but it is true that miscarriage is very common and within 12 months of having mine I had a lovely baby. I want to tell you that I too wondered if I had done something wrong. I think it is common to blame oneself. I was not overweight. I was the weight then that I'm hoping to get back to shortly. If you want to lose weight and get healthy you have come to the right place. Good luck with it.

firstsip

Sorry if this was harsh but sounds like you need a kick in the pants and sometimes people who are close to you won't tell you what you need to hear.

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Your intentions might be good, but your execution is severely lacking. I'm pretty sure her coming to MFP and noting that this was devastating for her is the sign that she had her kick in the pants.