Boyfriend help please

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  • Dub_D
    Dub_D Posts: 1,760 Member
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    Just break up.
  • gabby365
    gabby365 Posts: 29 Member
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    :brokenheart: Find a new boyfriend....take it from someone who will be married 30 yrs. this Valentine's, sweetie....:flowerforyou:
    I just recently joined MFP advice from surgery consultant, I need to loose 20 lbs. before surgery. My husband loves his fried, fatty foods, and his Bud....but I weighed 270, down to 258.3, I joined MFP 12-27-2012 and I will never see 270, 260 AGAIN...my husband still eats his way but in NO way would he ever think of making fun or ridiculing me for doing this, suceed or fail I know have his support 100%....you need support....if your boyfriend doesn't provide it...get a new one before you make him your husband....:love:

    This... FIND A NEW BOYFRIEND. Why stay with THAT?
  • MightyDomo
    MightyDomo Posts: 1,265 Member
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    Sounds like many here are saying what I am thinking about this. Honesty is the best policy and if he doesn't choose to support you then you have a decision to make.

    And in my personal opinion and experience I can tell you having an unsupportive know-it-all as your significant other is extremely taxing to both your body and emotions and when you are working on you... what you need is support and not criticism. And he certainly sounds like he's been more critical of you than supportive.
  • islandnutshel
    islandnutshel Posts: 1,143 Member
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    rent the video "supersize me" and watch with boyfriend.

    Stick to your healthy cooking and eating, and you will out live McBoyfriend.

    (that sounds cruel, I mean him no harm, I just hope he figures it out before high blood pressure, diabetes, gout and heart diseas set in)
  • melmar76
    melmar76 Posts: 14 Member
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    Sweetie.... you are completely fooling yourself if you think how he is acting is ok... he has a nasty case of *kitten*! As hard as it, is you need to tell him to support you, love you and treat you with respect or... well, F**K OFF. You deserve better.
  • throttler228
    throttler228 Posts: 28
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    This sounds like a pretty significant lack of understanding and respect on your boyfriend's part. I've been there. I am lucky to have someone way more supportive now.

    McDonalds is healthier because he isn't gaining? Sit him down to watch Super Size Me or something like that, just to give him something on the other side of that spectrum. Skinny doesn't mean automatically healthy if that's what he is eating all day.

    You sound like you know what you are doing, and could really use some positive support. I'd suggest looking for support elsewhere, and consider if you find it worth taking the time and effort to educate your boyfriend about the food he is eating.

    Keep cooking for yourself, don't worry if he eats it, and portion it out in to small lunch sized containers for later, immediately. Get a food scale and be aware of how much you eat, and look up the nutritional values of your recipes. Keep it up! Don't get down!
  • Fitnin6280
    Fitnin6280 Posts: 618 Member
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    You said he may not be aware he is making you feel this way? How can he know if you don't tell him. Everyone is quick to say get rid of him, but if you don't communicate with him then it isn't all his fault.

    Talk to the man, then, if it doesn't get better then you can kick him to the curb. But at least give him a chance to fix it.

    Just my opinion.
  • Slack2ShortGo
    Slack2ShortGo Posts: 74 Member
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    It sounds to me like your boyfriend is suffering from a condition known as "HesanAsshole" basically it causes him to do things that a normal person would think very rude but for him it seems normal.

    No matter what course of action you choose you should definitely tell him to back off.

    I think your best option is a jerkectomy. What this does for you is relieves the stress by removing the cause. It basically takes your boyfriend and relocates him to a different place where he will be free to suffer out his condition in solitude. The main advantage to this one is it actually results in you being single which frees you up to find a guy that is more supportive and deserving.

    Well, I have to agree with the above. I wouldn't have said it so "eloquently" though, but you hit the nail on the head there.
    My wife had a roommate with a boyfriend like yours and they "were" engaged. We couldn't stand watching him run her down. She finally wised up and dumped his *kitten*! I don't think any relationship is worth the emotional distress he is causing you.
    Good Luck.
  • tracymat
    tracymat Posts: 296 Member
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    You're afraid of hurting him by telling him he's hurting you? If it's bothering you so much, you HAVE to say something. Simple.
  • Going4Lean
    Going4Lean Posts: 1,077 Member
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    sit him down and tell him everything you just wrote down and demand more support from him.
  • Drussander
    Drussander Posts: 266 Member
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    Wait, what are your boyfriend's redeeming qualities that make him worth keeping again?
  • collingmommy
    collingmommy Posts: 456 Member
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    I would do the same to him that he's doing to u! Wave turkey in his face , stand over him and complain about the grease smell, tell him "look at all that FAT! ! garbage, " pull up s studies about what McDonalds does to your body! That is what i done to my other half when he didn't like what i was eating! He stopped, i fix two meals most night s, lol occasionally, i slide in healthystuff when he isn't looking, but he eats it! Good luck!
  • ImprovingEla
    ImprovingEla Posts: 396 Member
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    Talk to him calmly while you still can, before you snap right into his face!
    Maybe he really does not realize what he is doing, but if he continues to do this after a good talk and maybe 1 (and I mean just 1) warning, throw him out, cause if he cannot be supportive of your health he can not be supportive in other things you eventually want to change in your life!
  • shunggie
    shunggie Posts: 1,036 Member
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    The boyfriend needs to TRY and understand. He sounds young and foolish. You can be thin as a rail with your heart clogged up, I'm afraid time and his diet will catch-up with him. I think its a good idea to show him MFP, show him how calories and exercise work. I could not have another serious conversation with a person that told me McDeaths food is more nutritious than home-cooked food. Make him watch Super-size Me. This is your health- literally the number of years you have to live if he isn't at least open to supporting you it's a deal breaker.
  • j4nash
    j4nash Posts: 1,719 Member
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    hit him on the head with a frying pan
  • lururu
    lururu Posts: 123 Member
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    Just because your bf is thin does in no way indicate that he is healthy. McDonalds is nice once in a while but eaten every day it's a very unhealthy choice.
    It sounds to me like your bf is being a bit of a wanker about your cooking so next time you want to cook yourself something healthy and delicious ask him to take himself out for a walk. My hubby is thin but he totally supports my weight loss, he eats what I eat (the kids too) and never comments on my food unless I ask his opinion (or I am about to commit diet hare kiri).

    How old is he anyway? Seems like a very immature attitude he has despite his up brining.

    Just focus on yourself Hun, do what you want to do, eat what you want to eat and maybe have a nice long think about being in love with him as opposed to in love with the idea of loving him.
  • Missjilly1025
    Missjilly1025 Posts: 146 Member
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    Ignore it? He's a like a giant ****ing elephant. I know this isn't what you asked but I would get rid of him. He doesn't sound very supportive at all. He either does or doesn't support you - you can't make him understand anything. Either he is there for you or he isn't.
  • maillemaker
    maillemaker Posts: 1,253 Member
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    The point of a partner is to be supportive.

    Does this sound supportive to you?
  • Beckyloo80
    Beckyloo80 Posts: 1,088 Member
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    Boys are a luxury, not a necessity

    That is all
  • barb1241
    barb1241 Posts: 324 Member
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    It doesn't seem like he needs to be a rocket scientist to understand two very BASIC things. He can eat any way he wants to. You can do the same. End of discussion. For both of you. Just doesn't get any simpler than that. If he can eat crap and garbage and is happy doing so, then it is not up to you to change his menu. BUT-the same in reverse; if you want to cook good "real" food, then you have every right to do so, without him trying to change your menu.

    Just sayin'

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