Husband not attracted to me...need support!

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  • kdeaux1959
    kdeaux1959 Posts: 2,675 Member
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    Best wishes on your journey; hope your challenges get worked out in the most appropriate end.
  • JFPercy65
    JFPercy65 Posts: 2 Member
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    Hello, please feel free to add me as I am on the same journey. You indicated that your marriage is in troubled waters. We can get you to safety before it sinks. My marriage ended one month ago. Because of my weight gain and medical problems my former spouce found herself attracted to another.

    Best of Luck
  • susiemeri
    susiemeri Posts: 38 Member
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    I sent you a request too - so sorry you're not getting support at home. :(
  • monicalosesweight
    monicalosesweight Posts: 1,173 Member
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    Feel free to add me if you want some help on the gluten free front. I'm gluten free due to a wheat allergy. I can tell you though, there are ways to keep the calories lower when it comes to gluten. It's a matter of being selective and eating differently. I'll be happy to pass on some advice that might help you deal with that.

    Monica
  • invincible_summer
    invincible_summer Posts: 35
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    Sorry to be blunt here,

    "and has told me he is not attracted to me because of my weight gain over the years."

    - Leave him. For your sanity. For your daughters' sanity.
  • User819
    User819 Posts: 271
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    I will gladly support you.
  • cuterbee
    cuterbee Posts: 545
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    Looking at the glass half full... It's good that your husband told you how he felt instead of just running out and having an affair.

    Except that there are some men who start saying this stuff to justify the affair they are currently having. I don't know that I'd rule that out.
  • Trilby16
    Trilby16 Posts: 707 Member
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    Looking good is the best revenge. Lose the weight, then kick HIM to the curb.
  • dallas4u
    dallas4u Posts: 57
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    These message boards are great for support. I haven't read through all the comments - you're headline caught my eye though. Husband sounds rude and non-supportive and super mean.

    Sweetie - there is someone out there for everyone. There are men who love curvy women.

    I would kick him to the curb and find a man who loves you for you and your curves .

    If you are going to keep him, then by all means post on these boards.
  • audra0831
    audra0831 Posts: 244
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    I'm going to send you a friend request.

    My hubby and I have been married for 12 years and we have two children (11 and 9) and I don't know if he's attracted to me or not, because we basically lead separate lives. He's is terribly overweight and he is not willing to make any changes to his lifestyle, not even for the good of the family. So...I also feel like I'm on this journey alone. Different circumstances, but same feelings.

    Like you, I am losing weight for ME. So let's do it together! You will get nothing but support from me - I'm here for you! :flowerforyou:
  • alasuzzo
    alasuzzo Posts: 4
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    The positive thing to note is you are doing this for you. Keep moving forward. Ironically, life is very fluid and can change courses at any moment. You are doing a tremendous benefit for your health and well being and motivating your children. You have also chosen a very positive alternative to a toxic relationship by seeking positive feedback, which we all need, by the way. Feel free to add me as a friend. Best wishes with your weight loss!
    Denise
  • forevermarin
    forevermarin Posts: 10 Member
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    I am a big beautiful women adn I know so because I tell myself everyday. I used to let everyone get to me and yes I need to lose 100 or so but cant get past 7. You have to lose weight for yourself. FInd some great workout music and then some great motivational music. I have different playlist to help me. I know I am the biggest one in the gym when I go but as a wise man once told me, what do I care if "skinny minnie" is next to me, I may never see her again and if I do let her notice how positive I am. Stay positive and get a great support group. Count me in. :happy: Life is hard enough as it is and stress causes you to gain weight. Dont let it affect you.
  • nsivils
    nsivils Posts: 1
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    Remember that this is for you, and you are a beautiful woman but most importantly your kids think you are beautiful to them and in their eyes no one if more beautiful! So hang on to that and just be healthy for you and them. That's all that matters.
    Please feel free to add me as a friend! -Nikki
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
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    Perhaps he DOESN'T want to lose you, and what he said is just him responding out of a sense of panic... feeling like if he convinced you to lose weight... then their attractiveness wouldn't be as threatening to you as a couple. Perhaps he feels somewhat guilty in appreciating their positive feedback too.

    Or maybe he's already cheating on her and he's trying to blame it on her weight gain.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
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    I have celiacs disease :) I totally get the weight gain from gluten free. If you need any support I am also here!

    I didn't know we were supposed to gain weight on gluten free. That hasn't happened to me. I just replaced the wheat with other grains and vegetables - mostly whole, low or unprocessed foods. The only thing that happened to me was the loss of pain, bloating and inflammation. I'm always interested in stuff like this so thanks for bringing it up. Gotta go do research...:flowerforyou:
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
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    Perhaps he DOESN'T want to lose you, and what he said is just him responding out of a sense of panic... feeling like if he convinced you to lose weight... then their attractiveness wouldn't be as threatening to you as a couple. Perhaps he feels somewhat guilty in appreciating their positive feedback too.

    Or maybe he's already cheating on her and he's trying to blame it on her weight gain.

    ^ Sorry, but that idea crossed my mind, too.

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