A Sad Realization.

STrooper

I wish my husband would read this thread. He is down 50 pounds (around 163) and he looks GREAT, in clothes. He says he can't stand how he looks naked and he doesn't know what to do. People are cautioning him not to lose much more or even any more weight because he is starting to look too thin. He wants to go for 10 more pounds in hopes that he will lose all the belly fat. My husband is VERY stubborn though, sometimes to a fault, and he THINKS he knows this or that and doesn't like to research things or try things out. For instance, I just went through and did all the calculations on my BMR and TDEE to set my calorie intake correctly... I was feeling LOW ENERGY and OVERLY TIRED all the time on 1200/day. Come to find out, my BMR is just under 1400 and my TDEE is 2100... based on my calculations I should be eating about 1600/day, but of course I'm afraid to go up to that level from 1200 so I've baby stepped my way up to 1400.... time will tell...

Anyhow...
Thanks for sharing!!

He will not lose all that belly fat at least not right away or by losing another 10 pounds. In 2011, I stayed at 190 pounds basically for the entire year. The differences I see in pictures taken at the end of 2010 and the end of 2011 are very dramatic for no weight loss. You could see it in the "belly fat" and other fat. I'm now down to 172. Guess what, still some belly fat. Another 10 pounds is not going to make another difference. Sometimes it takes a while to have the bubblewrap move around

Here is something else. If you've become accustomed to yourself looking a certain way, it can be tough to see yourself in a different way. Now it is easier for me to see myself in the context of my lighter weight because much of life has been spent at a weight of less than 185 pounds. But for the 10 years or so where I was over 200 pounds and finally up to nearly 250, I began to view myself through the "fat context." It has taken me a while to get back to seeing myself through the "thin" lens, again.

Even worse is the loose skin (particularly with age). Gone is the tight stomach skin of years ago. The other day I was doing my pushups without a shirt and I looked down to see this skin (where the fat is also still present but I can only "pinch an inch") hanging from my stomach. My thought was "what the hell is this?" I realized that even as trim as I look standing up, the effects of being overweight have taken their toll on parts of my body. Fortunately (and unfortunately as well) I am the only one that has to see that.

upgetupgetup

Well, I'll admit to tripping out when I got to goal weight. Not that it was horrible, but it's not the body I thought I was going to get (ie the body I had in my early 20s.) I have mixed feelings about it, but I think it's best not to fixate on 'bits'. Pay attention to things that you like, and as much as possible, focus on your PROCESS now. Getting a little zen about the workout itself helps take the mind off the anticipated aesthetic results, you know? Generates a whole different feeling about what your body is and does.

(Which is why I think it's good to do something fun, as well as stuff that's just about looking better.)

Reeny1_8

Your story sounds much like the beginning of this inspirational tale, which I've seen linked elsewhere in the forums. She is where I'd love to get to, and her story might offer you some hope too.

http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/07/21/meet-staci-your-new-powerlifting-super-hero/

Wow! That is amazing! Thank you for sharing, well worth the read!!

LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo

The first time I weighed myself at my heaviest, I was 180lbs, 35%bf.

I lost the weight, but I did it the stupid way - cardio, cardio, cardio, more cardio, and eating - total, not net - between 500 and 1500 calories per day, depending on how idiotic I was being at the time.

Current stats - 117 pounds, 23%bf.

This means I went from having 117lbs of lean mass to having just 90. I lost 27 pounds of muscle being an idiot.

Now I have the difficult task ahead of putting muscle back on, when it probably would have been 1000 times easier to preserve what I had and lose the fat more slowly and sensibly.

Take this as a cautionary tale. If you lose weight stupidly, it doesn't matter how much you lose, you won't look good naked, you won't be strong, and you'll have a hell of a lot more work ahead of you after reaching your goal weight once you realize that you are a pathetic pile of skinny-fat squish.

Great post! You sound just like me when I first got to my goal weight via eating 1200 calories a day and only lifting 3lbs. Like most women, I was scared to lift heavy because of the stupid myth of looking like a female Arnold Schwarzenegger that is widespread among the fitness community. But ever since I got serious with heavy weight lifting, everything has changed. And although I weigh 10 lbs. heavier now than when I was a skinny fat 52 kg (115lbs.) 26% body fat, I was able to reduce my body fat percentage to 19% and lost a total of 40 inches plus I'm now able to eat 1700-2300 calories a day without worrying on gaining fat.

Reeny1_8

That's what I'm doing. But hopefully, some of those in my former mindset will read this and make their own journeys much easier and more enjoyable. I'm not just b*tching to b*tch. Just trying to put it out there that excessive cardio + undereating = a frail, weak, squishy body.
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I'm so glad you posted this! I'm a newbie and would never had known any of this had you not of put yourself out there and shared. Thank you! I'm sure it couldn't have been easy. My muscles thank you too

LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo

That's what I'm doing. Cardio, cardio, cardio. I know I should lift... But I'm scared to, I think.

Nah don't be scared of weights. I know where you are coming from and you think that it will make you bulky but based from both my experience and also from other women who embraced the barbells and big dumbbells, it went the other way around.

alexie97

thanks for sharing!
that's exactly why i joined this site i'd much rather be losing fat slowly than losing muscle and being smaller but less defined

LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo

oh and 23% body fat is fine for a woman.

It depends on your age. If you are young like in your late teens to early 20's, a 23% body fat is considered high. That's the reason why ACE designate a range coz that varies according to your age so for fitness (average) range of 21-24%, a young woman should aim for the minimum of 21%.

mmddwechanged

I was a body builder ten years ago. I had awesome abs. I did handstands and cartwheels and upside down pressups. I was proud of how heavy I could lift and quite confident in the "boys area" of the gym. Skip ahead ten years: I do a little resistance, not much. I run about once a week, and I eat at a deficit. Since I started this journey I have almost lost the ten pounds I wanted to lose. I can't lift this year for medical reasons. I am frail and weak, and I probably do fit that awful label: " skinny-fat". But I choose to be proud! I believe that running does strengthen muscles, I believe that losing mass is healthy for me, Next year may or may not be a muscle building year, either way I am learning and feeling good on many different levels. We are all on a different journey. I guess I'm writing this, too, to remind myself that I'm ok too.

michellekicks

I did the same thing. The first time I lost weight I lost 60 lbs and went from 133 1/2 lbs lean mass to 120 lbs lean - so I lost 13.5 lbs lean. This time I did it much more slowly - average daily deficit of 290 calories - and still lost another 4.6 lbs of lean mass but out of about 35 total pounds lost.

I didn't lift. Now I have 116 lbs lean and am lifting. And eating protein like it's going out of style... Not doing it again. Ever.

I feel your pain.

AnvilHead

oh and 23% body fat is fine for a woman.

It depends on your age. If you are young like in your late teens to early 20's, a 23% body fat is considered high.

It also depends on what woman. Some would be happy at 23%; others would prefer to look more lean/athletic/muscular/whatever. It's not a one-size-fits-all thing. I'm a 50-year old male and my bodyfat % is currently in the low end of the "Average" range (18-24% for men), but I'm not satisfied with settling for "Average". Kudos to the OP for setting her goals higher and aiming to rise above "average".

Findekano

I was a body builder ten years ago. I had awesome abs. I did handstands and cartwheels and upside down pressups. I was proud of how heavy I could lift and quite confident in the "boys area" of the gym. Skip ahead ten years: I do a little resistance, not much. I run about once a week, and I eat at a deficit. Since I started this journey I have almost lost the ten pounds I wanted to lose. I can't lift this year for medical reasons. I am frail and weak, and I probably do fit that awful label: " skinny-fat". But I choose to be proud! I believe that running does strengthen muscles, I believe that losing mass is healthy for me, Next year may or may not be a muscle building year, either way I am learning and feeling good on many different levels. We are all on a different journey. I guess I'm writing this, too, to remind myself that I'm ok too.

Oh, absolutely. And as a former bodybuilder, you probably have quite a bit of lean mass to spare that I personally didn't. I definitely didn't mean to offend those who's goals include cardio or exclude lifting for reasons of medical problems or having different goals. Sorry if it came off that way.

Findekano

And, for the record, I could probably be very happy with 23% bodyfat if I had more lean mass. It's not that I want to be, like 10% or something. Ideally, I'd be 18-20% and just have a good deal more muscle mass.

geekyjock76

I did a VLCD experiment on myself years ago and ate 1700 calories (had a 3100 TDEE) and did 60 minutes of cardio on an elliptical at 85% my VO2max, every day, for two months, burning approximately 800 calories in addition to lifting heavy six days a week. Since I was estimated at having 11% body fat at the time, most of the weight I lost came from fat-free mass. On one hand I regret doing the experiment because I lost a lot of muscle that I gained but did learn, personally, how huge deficits and excessive exercise can cause hyperatrophy to fat-free mass in a reasonably lean person.

katy_trail

Cathe Friedrich workouts.

You can start with beginner level workouts for cheap from ebay, or start with some of her newer ones and modify.
Almost every workout of hers uses weights or resistance bands and builds muscle in some way.
she even plans out rotations- suggested schedule of workouts for a month or even 3 months at a time.
you can use her workouts, or sub in what you have already, just keep in mind the type of workout/intensity and so on.

The bright side of this is, now you just have gaining muscle to focus on.
your body isn't fighting itself, and you'll be able to measure your progress.

Justkritter

I feel you. I did 1300-1600 on my daily while still doing HIIT and heavy lifting and indeed got down 10lbs but in the expense of strength. Body still looks the same but I was over-all weaker than I was. That's why I'm slowly trying to repair my metabolism and strength by upping my calorie intake and adding more weight to my lifts. Now I'm at 2130 cal a day still 500 cal behind my goal.

Wetterdew

I started going down this path last year. Now I'm being more patient. I'm glad this thread is getting attention.

Hendrix7

oh and 23% body fat is fine for a woman.

But losing 27 pounds of lean mass is not. That's why an athlete and a model can have the same bf%, but look very different. I look frail and sickly, not strong, and that's what I'm upset about.

percentage wise, your are in better shape now than you were at 180 pounds. this logic doesn't make any sense

It's pretty simple.

It doesn't matter what her bf% scales tell her, the OP is not happy with the way she looks. Which other than health purposes is why we are all here, correct?

You telling her 'oh you BF is ok' is not going to change her mind.

People get too hung up on BF% and wanting to get it measured all the time when this only confirms what you already see in the mirror everyday anyway.

Sarauk2sf

fine, then work out and build muscle now.

You may be missing a major point here - do you realized how long it will take to rebuild the lost muscle?

Sarauk2sf

OP: thank you for posting this.

A few years ago, I was not ambulatory due to illness for a few months and under-ate for a good while longer than that as a result of the recovery. I was lucky that I had a very high LBM to start, however, I lost a significant amount of LBM as a result. At the same body fat as before my illness I am about 10lb lighter. I am now going to have to go through a very long process of recomping to regain that LBM. Do I have to? No - my LBM is still proportionately higher than many women of my height. Do I want to? Yes - I want that LBM back and the muscle definition that goes with it.

I totally understand what you are saying and it really has nothing to do with whether you are at a theoretically healthy body fat %. You are young - you can do it. It will be a long process, but lifting weights to increase your LBM has a huge amount of other benefits and it can be fun. Just make sure you have a good routine.

Sarauk2sf

Thanks for the advice. Anyone have tips for maintaining muscle?

Eat at a reasonable caloric deficit, strength train (full body workout 3 x a week), 1g protein per lb of LBM.

Oishii

When I reached my goal weight my arms were so skinny I couldn't shave my underarms because they had become so concave! I know now that this is something I, personally, wish to avoid, and probably could have avoided had I strength trained.

So I understand where the OP is coming from. I also understand that hearing someone so upset about a perfectly healthy body is also upsetting. I hope that the OP will be happy with her body in the long run, which can be as much about mindset as about BF% or LBM.

Martucha123

great post OP

remeber that even thoug re building muscle is difficult, it's also lost of fun
eat TDEE or slightly above, lift heavy, rest, repeat
you will get there

sarahmoo12

glad i read this never thought of that!!

DavPul

People get too hung up on BF% and wanting to get it measured all the time when this only confirms what you already see in the mirror everyday anyway.

QFT

MissPeppers

I've been there - so good that you've come to that conclusion
Last year I had a lower weight (10 lbs) than I have now, but I like my body a lot better with more muscle.

I hope everybody read this topic!!!!

EvgeniZyntx

Good post and self awareness.

The big picture is that it isn't just about either weight or body fat percent.

Neither weight nor bf% truely equal a way to always improving esthetics, health and fitness. While losing weight or improving bf% can be excellent ways of getting to a better position with respect to those 3 elements the original post clearly shows a case where just losing weight can have negative results.

Looking at three questions:

How much do I want to weight?
What body composition do I want to have?
How fit and healthy do I want to be?

You really want to ask them together.
There are bad solutions everywhere: Weight loss without fitness? Composition without health? Fit but obese?

yoovie

Now you get to have newbie progress again :drinker:

yoovie

Lmao at previous post

Sorry... its just... there's so many words and no conclusion

Muddy_Yogi

Lmao at previous post

Sorry... its just... there's so many words and no conclusion

Maybe he is not finished...many more questions to ask? :huh: