How overweight is TOO overweight?

2

Replies

  • KristysLosing
    KristysLosing Posts: 683
    Your ex is completely insane. I've always been more attracted to bigger girls; i love hips and butts. If she don't jiggle, then she ain't worth it.

    I like you. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    Weight is just one factor is how attractive someone is. I could see morbid obesity being a turnoff, since that nearly always means an underlying self esteem issue, but "pudgy" wouldn't be an issue. A kind, pudgy guy with a friendly face is better than a ripped a-hole any day.
  • n0ob
    n0ob Posts: 2,390 Member
    I'm clinically obese...I hope someone shows us fatties some love.
  • ModoVincere
    ModoVincere Posts: 530 Member
    I prefer that my woman be happy with herself. If she's good with it, so am I.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    I don't know man... Can you still be attracted to someone EVEN IF they're a tad pudgy? Maybe you're like me and go more for personality... Maybe not. What do you think?
    Individual preference is what it comes down to. There is no universal answer to this kind of question.
  • philshjips
    philshjips Posts: 41 Member
    Weight is just one factor is how attractive someone is. I could see morbid obesity being a turnoff, since that nearly always means an underlying self esteem issue, but "pudgy" wouldn't be an issue. A kind, pudgy guy with a friendly face is better than a ripped a-hole any day.

    I think if you've got a ripped a-hole then there's some other stuff goin on... :tongue:
  • sarahrbraun
    sarahrbraun Posts: 2,261 Member
    Age may have a factor in it too. The decent guys tend to be less obvious, and the douchecanoe's are out in full force most the time. You look younger to me, so what I have actually read, when guys are highschool/college age, they are programmed to like the skinny hipless societal beauty types, but once they reach around 25 or 26, they start thinking of procreation, and that widen's their perceptions and preferences. Not to mention they finish growing up.
    I do have to say if a guy dumped me and said it was cause I was too fat, I would probably junk punch him (hey being short has its advantages) and make a sarcastic smartass comment about some imperfection of his own.

    THIS^^^ makes a lot of sense. Guys who have grown up tend to gravitate towards the women with curves--a more Marilyn Monroe type body. My friend and I had this discussion just this past weekend. Many women who have had children tend to have a little softness to their curves that guys really like. I had an older gentleman ( like 70ish) tell me that I had a better body NOW (obese) than I did 18 years ago before I had kids when I was a perfect size 8.

    On the flip side, I just ran the numbers...hubby was smack dab in the middle of a healthy BMI range when I met him. 18 years later, he is like 1 point into the obese range. Honestly, I would have never guessed. I knew he had gained weight, but would never guess that he is obese now. Personally, I like a man who is not bony, but not FAT to the point where he has rolls. I like a moderate amount of muscle definition--a ton of muscle is gross.
  • __RANDY__
    __RANDY__ Posts: 1,036 Member
    i love chubby girls
  • LittleMiss_WillLoseIt
    LittleMiss_WillLoseIt Posts: 1,373 Member
    i love chubby girls

    That's why you friended me......I thought it was my amazing awesome personality. Total fail! :cry:
  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
    My wife and I loved each other when we were overweight but I gotta say everything is better now that we're both in shape.

    Better sex = better relationship.
  • strawberrytoast
    strawberrytoast Posts: 711 Member
    If they dont like you the way you are right now- they aint good enough for you.
  • gr8pillock
    gr8pillock Posts: 374 Member
    I don't normally go for a man based on how he looks. I can find someone handsome, but do I want to jump his bones because of it? No. I don't want to jump someone until they make me laugh, or flash me the right smile and then flirt with me the right way.

    I love a rugby player build on a guy, but I once found a VERY VERY big guy unbelievably attractive because of his voice and almost gave him my number, but was too shy to do so.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    "you're sooooo pretty"

    "you're better off without him!"

    "you're perfect the way you are!"



    .... any other affirmations you'd like??



    Anyone with self respect and any sense of maturity isn't going to dismiss someone they love because they are overweight.
  • gr8pillock
    gr8pillock Posts: 374 Member
    Sorry if this was a little misleading. Ive just been doing a bit of thinking about my last relationship. I know how I feel about love and relationships, but many tend to disagree. Not being superficial, I was actually dumped for being too fat, which made me feel just awesome. But it is nice to see that there are genuinely good guys out there who can appreciate a girl for who she is, not her waist size. Thats all :)


    Honey, you weren't dumped for being too big. If a guy claims there is something wrong with you physically and that is why they are leaving, it is their attempt to blame what is wrong between on you both on just you. True love sees past all of that ****. Do you think you'd still be together and madly in love if you were skinny? If you think so, then it still had nothing to do with your weight, it's something to do with him.
  • piggydog
    piggydog Posts: 322
    If you can't take care of your body how would you be able to take care of me?
    I will not date someone significantly over weight... I don't find it attractive
  • darleyschroeder
    darleyschroeder Posts: 322
    Yeah, you can be attracted to someone if they are a bit overweight or even quite large. Generally, people are initially attracted to someone because of how they look. But when you get to know someone they become more attractive or significantly less attractive because of their personality and charm.
    Maybe this is just a girl thing though.
  • _the_feniks_
    _the_feniks_ Posts: 3,412 Member
    To answer the question, when I have to slap your leg and ride the wave in... you may be too overweight.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    I'm clinically obese...I hope someone shows us fatties some love.

    'Obese' is a measure of weight, not fat.
  • darleyschroeder
    darleyschroeder Posts: 322
    My wife and I loved each other when we were overweight but I gotta say everything is better now that we're both in shape.

    Better sex = better relationship.

    This guy has got a point. My hubs was a little chubby, but when he got a labor intensive job he totally muscled up and leaned out. He was super hot before and now he is just super, super hot!
  • Emma_Problema
    Emma_Problema Posts: 422 Member
    Individual Preference

    /end thread

    Unless you're on here looking for compliments :yawn:
  • shell6469
    shell6469 Posts: 54 Member
    WT? This was a waste of time... Why do I open this crap....
  • LondonEliza
    LondonEliza Posts: 456 Member
    Sorry if this was a little misleading. Ive just been doing a bit of thinking about my last relationship. I know how I feel about love and relationships, but many tend to disagree. Not being superficial, I was actually dumped for being too fat, which made me feel just awesome. But it is nice to see that there are genuinely good guys out there who can appreciate a girl for who she is, not her waist size. Thats all :)

    Oh honey, you were not dumped because you were overweight.
    You were dumped because you were unfortunate enough to date an as*ho1e .... who used weight as an excuse to dump you.

    To b@stardise a quote from Winston Churchill:
    You can lose weight but he will always be a d0uche and the sack it came in

    x
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
    Sorry if this was a little misleading. Ive just been doing a bit of thinking about my last relationship. I know how I feel about love and relationships, but many tend to disagree. Not being superficial, I was actually dumped for being too fat, which made me feel just awesome. But it is nice to see that there are genuinely good guys out there who can appreciate a girl for who she is, not her waist size. Thats all :)

    Sorry you got dumped for your weight (especially if the guy knew that going in)......but on the other hand, it's not fair to have certain expectations and standards yourself but then not allow the opposite sex to have them.

    If some guys prefer athletic women, that doesn't make then not "good guys"
  • mercymarque
    mercymarque Posts: 450
    My hubby has the beer gut and man boobs... I still love him and still find him sexy. If he loses it great, if not I still down for him.
  • Routerninja
    Routerninja Posts: 201
    Well, I've been dumped for being fat many times. Most recently she claimed it was a myriad of other issues but it kept coming back to my weight. This was after I had went from 602 to 460 and was still trending downward.

    Am I still fat? Yep (Well, as much as 470 on a very large 6'8" frame can be..). I'm also a lot better off without her since I have someone who loves and adores me just as I am and wants to work together on losing weight to be healthy, not for some superficial BS reason.

    Best Advice I can give?

    Be happy with yourself AS YOU ARE NOW.

    Find someone who loves you AS YOU ARE NOW.

    Build from there.
  • fizzletto
    fizzletto Posts: 252 Member
    I have to confess... I'm a bit shallow. I am a chubby chaser. I love a little bit of pudge on a man. I do not go for muscles or weedy guys. I will admit that my boyfriend's weight (over) was one of the things that made me fall for him. Of course, now that I'm in love with him I don't care what he looks like, but it did attract me to start with. In fact we are getting healthy together these days, and he's now a medium. I am proud of him because he's healthier and more confident and happier. But I do miss that belly sometimes... sigh...
  • Bobtheangrytomato
    Bobtheangrytomato Posts: 251 Member
    Matter of opinion. Although bony people always poke you in all the wrong places :)
  • MissyJessy
    MissyJessy Posts: 1,279 Member
    its a health thing for me... and taking care of yourself... if your overweight and theres no medical conditions restricting eating or working out im not interested and that may be shallow. But how can you expect anyone else to love you if you clearly dont care about yourself?

    However if i meet a great guy who is making efforts to change his life then thats different as long as the attempt is there then we will see where it goes but i typically find myself very attracted to fit men
  • sullus
    sullus Posts: 2,839 Member
    I don't know man... Can you still be attracted to someone EVEN IF they're a tad pudgy? Maybe you're like me and go more for personality... Maybe not. What do you think?

    Sure. You look a little chubby, and I find your picture attractive ...
  • sarahrbraun
    sarahrbraun Posts: 2,261 Member
    My wife and I loved each other when we were overweight but I gotta say everything is better now that we're both in shape.

    Better sex = better relationship.

    This guy has got a point. My hubs was a little chubby, but when he got a labor intensive job he totally muscled up and leaned out. He was super hot before and now he is just super, super hot!

    Junk tends to shrink or grow as a male gains or loses weight! My youngest son went through a chubby phase, and his junk all but disappeared. When he leaned out a little, it popped right back out.

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